Fuck Banks
 

Man, it is fucking useless trying to use a bank as a middleman for liquid funds.

I deposit thousands, then 6 DAYS LATER try to spend the thousands but get denied because they have up to 6 BUSINESS days to clear the funds. FUCKERS. :feels-hot

What kind of bullshit is that?


"Out of state checks"
BULLSHIT.

These are the same checks that I deposit all the time and have NEVER bounced. EVER.

So let me get this straight... if I happened to be IN arizona for example (ccbill) then I can have the funds right away. RIiiiiight.

Because proximity has SO FUCKING MUCH to do with banking these days.

Oh man, i have nothing but problems with bank.

It seems the more money i bring the more tight assed they get.

wait tell you get an out of country check that they tell you will take only 15 buisness days to clear .. so im like 15 days fuck it ill just wait the 15 day sbut that 15 days turned into 30 days with weekends / holidays that feel in that month and then i get fucked on the exchange rate

Exactly... Mother fuckers...

Its been much longer than 6 days, but with holidays and weekends it gets stretched out.

Maybe if the FUCKERS would work past 2pm they could get a FUCKING CHECK CLEARED.

Jesus... I just called to bitch them out some more and they do me the gigantic HUGE Favor of agreeing to release $400 in funds tomorrow.


THANKS FOR NOTHING ASS WIPES. What the hell?
Oh, so $400 of my out of state money is perfectly okay to clear but the rest is not??????


Sigh.

ahah i had that problem , talk to your bank manager if your doing big volumes and you have some very good credit they'll waive that shit ... did so for me :thumbsup

Good to hear.

As an individual I have unbelievably good credit, but my company 1)has never borrowed any money and therefore has no repayment history
2)has never even taken out a credit card because I've always done wire transfers or debit cards or checks

So the high cash flow adult biz has effectively put this company in a never-had-credit situation... Hmmmmph.

Its doing high volume, but compared to a "real" mainstream corporation its relatively low, so I don't know what kind of breaks I can get. Its worth asking...

I guess its true: "Cash is King" but out of state checks into a bank is not king until 6 business days later. :(

The longer banks hold checks and wires, the more interest they collect that doesn't go to any customer. They're in the business of cash, bankers have been the greediest bastards on the planet since the Rothschilds started inbreeding. Don't expect them to do shit for you unless your balance is 8 figures. Once you have a balance banks are great to you though.

Unfortunately 8 figures ain't gonna happen anytime soon, and I'd be a fool to keep 8 figures in one bank account... :)

I didn't mean one account, I meant 8 figures with one bank. That could include several accounts and investments, banks have high end financial planners for larger clients.

Banks are full of shit.

My bank does pretty good by me. In the early days (1996) they would hold a check here and there, but that stopped within a month or so. Haven't had a check held since then.

Right now banks present the accual check to the other bank, meaning if I send you a check your bank will send that check bank to my bank to clear, that can take many days or even more.

The good news is their is a brand new system being built, if it works out some banks will be able to clear funds SAME DAY!

http://www.sunspot.net/business/bal-...ness-headlines

read the link its interesting

It took me a couple of switches, but I've found a bank that treats me well... I'm in Australia and they'll convert my USD cheques (ie 'foreign') on the spot. No funds withholding at all, or any conditions such as minimum balance. The only cheque that has ever bounced is the rubber globill one, and that hasn't affected my standing with them. (phew)

The strange thing is that an Australian cheque will still take 3 days to clear, while I get paid on the spot for international ones... they even ask if I would like cash!

After the announcement of a legal "dispute" I had about 3 years ago, the branch manager at my bank took it upon herself to put a 20 day hold on all my US cheques. The strange thing was, the dispute involved one of my clients from Canada, not the US. My US income was a separate part of my business from the work I did for this Canadian client.

So I had my lawyer phone her up and have a little chat with her. Since the track record on those US cheques was always 100%, with no NSF's or anything, it was unfair to punish me, especially in light of the fact that the legal issue hadn't even been resolved much less decided. In effect, the bank bitch had me guilty until proven innocent.

2 days after that phone call I visited the bank to make a deposit and she called me over to tell me the "hold" had been lifted. I told HER that when my mortgage is up for renewal I will be moving all my banking elsewhere. I'm happy to report that as of Dec. 19th 2003 all of my finances and banking are being handled by another bank. Oh, and those legal "dispute" charges were withdrawn 2 years after they were brought.



If your bank is putting an arbitrary hold on your funds for no good reason, then it's time to go talking to other banks who will be all too happy to receive your business.

use wires if you can. eliminates most of the bullshit.

10 days to clear the funds here ..

As long as you have sufficient funds in the account too cover a possible nsf and you have a good history with the bank, they shouldn't be placing a hold on the checks.

Here, in my local bank, I have to wait 30 days +/- ... now that's a fucking long time.. even when it's a check drawn on my own US bank account.. crackheads..

Don't let them bullshit you, it takes 3 days to clear the Fed. Anyone who tells you otherwise just bring that up, a manager will usually cut you a break. Those are just stupid bank policies so they can earn money off your cash being held in their vaults. Out of country checks do take longer, though.

- Titus

Rules are rules and because some people in society are clueless idiots who could not live without being told what to do, EVERYone in society (even the non-clueless) have to follow them. Society has always been this way. So dont get mad when the bank makes you follow their rules.

lol

:1orglaugh

that's fucked up

my checks clear overnight,id be pissed if i had to wait 30 days :glugglug

My Checks clear instantly

use wires

instant cash in your account

not all banks are like that...
depends how u deposit the check, through a teller or a machine.

My bank usually never holds the checks which i deposit through a teller but when they do try to act stupid and say we willl hold ur check bla bla bla i say im taking my business elsewhere, than the stupid teller goes to her supervisor and the supervisor says okay we wont hold the money...

FUCKERS

This is the shit that pisses me off as well, one of my banks says 20 days, the next says 30, it's not even that I'm in a rush, it just seems retarded in this day and age.

in australia it takes 28 business days for an international cheque to clear, even a casheir's cheque issued by a US bank, then they charge you $10 on top of it

Which bank?

Actually, I think I just answered my question. Which Bank!

Try Westpac or Bank of Melbourne if you're in Melb. Once you have a relationship with them they will do 4 or more USA cheques for a flat $AUD10 fee. Mine get cleared on the spot with no hold.

Don't complain, when I receive US check, it's 21 business day!

I've had good luck with local banks. It's the big boys that'll fuck you unless you have a high balance

Back in the day when intertest rates were high,,,

My accountant told me to setup a checking account with a small opposite cost bank.

You deposit a check from 1 account to the other but it takes 7 business days to clear, so you would earn 9-11 days interest on your money in both banks!!!

As this thread proves... rules are only for those who can't afford to get around them.

Definitly:BangBang:

My bank will hold any cheque if it's over a certain number ($2000 or something)...

Pisses me off, because a buddy wrote me a cheque, and the funds were removed from his account the day I deposited it... So what were the 5 days for? My bank already received the funds from the other bank...

:321GFY

The secret is to get cozy with your branch VP. Take him out for a night on the town like he's never had. Limo, barely dressed sexy girls, the works. Get him totally blasted and laid by the end of the night. Get lots of pics of him with the girls when he's wasted. Lots of pics.

You'll "own" him after that and will never have a problem with getting your checks cleared ever again.

:Graucho :Graucho :Graucho

:1orglaugh

Good advice KRL, i'll see what I can do...


BTW, who's bumping my month old threads and why?

here at my bank it's supposed to be 21 days to clear in your bank account but I made a special deal with the boss :thumbsup

Either establish a relationship with this bank or move to another one which will allow you to use your deposits immediately or very quickly.