Cocksucking jury duty.
 

Sent in my standard excuse letter that I've been sending for years.... never had a problem getting excused in California.... but apparently Hawai'i has different guidelines for the excuse department.

They just called about my letter and said they cannot excuse me. Fuckers.

So now I gotta fucking go..... end of the month.

well, should be a pretty damn short interview process for me at least..... cuz the first fucking thing outta my mouth is gonna be "I am a fucking pornographer. Thanks, and have a nice trial."

i had to do the jury duty thing a little while back

didnt get called into trial though i just sat in the tank and waited

stop crying

Had to read it three times before I understand it (alcohol is a bad thing), but I am happy we dont have those problems in the Netherlands.

your quite a whiney baby amp

has anyone changed your diaper lately?

when the cops find out you mollest animals in hawaii and they assign me to your jury i am going to make sure you get 400 yrs with a nigga named bubba

hahahahaha

fucking ignorant americans

I got cocksucking jury duty too, March 11th, I need an excuse.

Trust me act like a racist prick and you will be excused

yes I am.
no they haven't... you volunteering to wipe my ass?
looking forward to it.
hahahahaha right back atcha sweet cheeks.
fucking ignorant non-americans.

jury duty sux

Yup yup, same here in Las Vegas....waste of my entire morning:321GFY

Jury duty is your duty as an American citizen so Amp and modelgig stop whining like bitches. :( :)

i gave four years of my fucking life to this fucking country.... that should be good to last me for a while without having to be bothered with deciding the fate of some fucking drugged out twink that got caught selling his ass for some fucking ice.

They interview you first. You just have to come off like a racist asshole. They WILL NOT pick you

You do have a good point. I guess the world is less complex than we once thought.

I always thought being called to jury duty was sort of an honor, like your community is saying "Hey, here is an honest standup guy, please come and help us decide the guilt or innocense of a fellow member of society" ..... or something along those lines. Am I wrong? Is jury duty just a big pain in the ass to be avoided at all costs?


Do you know what kind of a trial it will be Amp? Is it murder? You know it might be quite an interesting experience. Of course if you're swamped with design work and have to put a lot of it on hold for this I can see where you'd be a might pissed.

hahaha... just be sure they don't decide to investigate your sites and put you on trial next :winkwink:

i guess that's one way to look at it....

personally I don't view it as any kind of "honor"..... it's a huge fucking pain in the ass and my time is worth more than $15 bucks a day. (cab fare not reimbursed, no daycare provided, and lunch not included.) And odds are, it's NOT a fellow member of society.... most likely it's some fucking waste of oxygen meth head that stabbed someone for a $5 spot.

the best way the state government can honor me, is to leave me the fuck alone.

besides.... if it's such an honor, there should be a right of refusal. But if you DON'T go, there is a warrent issued for your arrest and then YOU become the criminal.


and that sir, is fucked.

Go in there with the same attitude as you have now..

They will never pick you again:1orglaugh

Kinda hard in Hawaii. Holey

thank god I'm not on Moloka'i or Lana'i.... those poor bastards gotta buy a fucking plane ticket for this shit.

What are the penalties for avoiding jury duty? How much jail time? Fines?

They give you 3 more jury duties:1orglaugh

not sure.... but I imagine they issue a warrant for your arrest for contempt of court.... then it's up to the judge as to how hard you get Lawrence Connered.

tell em your really prejudice against hawaiins

:thumbsup

Those guys are not stupid. If you look angry or sarcastic, the judge will force you to stay.

Then you'll be selected as a juror when the defense and the prosecution select them.

:1orglaugh

I've been there and didn't get selected at the end. Took them 10 hours to select all of them. Longest day ever.

m0h?

hahaha...

i wonder if it ever happens that someone skipping jury duty gets a worse punishment than the criminal found guilty?

Lol.... I'd like to be there when you say it just to look at the lawyers faces.... :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

this is where the extensive tattooing may come in handy.... :Graucho

i doubt either the defense or the prosecution want a guy sitting on the jury that's covered in ink.

They will give you three more jury duties!

you can only be called once a year.

reason #93,492 to own a paysite:

you still make money even when sitting in on jury duty, plus if you're hooked up you can check stats on your cell phone during the case and just throw out random shit if someone asks you a question in deliberation.

hell, most phones even have aim these days ... you could still market your site from the courtroom!

all cellphones, pagers, & laptops must be turned off in the courtroom..... (per my little fucking instruction sheet here....)

also, no shorts, slippahs, tank tops, etc.....

which means now I gotta find clothes and shoes for this shit.

"i gave four years of my fucking life to this fucking country"

being a chef for the military was hard shit eh

I have no idea.... I wasn't a chef.

Can I come stay at your house while your sequestered. If you take long enough to deliberate the sentence, I could have a weeks vacation in Maui!:)

i can imagine it would be. that's a lot of food to cook. and without food, the army couldn't do much.

I believe it falls under the category of "civic duty" or something like that. And yes, there certainly is a penalty for pulling a no-show on it. But that's just the way it is. No sense getting all bent up about it. An Amp's gotta do what an Amp's gotta do.



I'm interested to hear what happens after they ask you what you do. Please come back and share with the class. :D

well, personally I think it's bullshit. What's the next "civic duty" they're gonna put on the books and mandate? Twice a year you get called to go mop the fucking jailhouse floors? How about go in and empty trashcans for the judge for a day? Maybe we should all be required to repaint the parking lot lines once a year so they stay fresh and sharp looking. Or maybe be mandated to take care of the bailif's fucking dry cleaning under penalty of law.


buncha fucking shit if you ask me.

No slippahs? Those are the only shoes I own.

Good thing I still live in Cali and can get out of this crap easily.

My mother always got out of jury duty 99% of the time cause my father was a cop !

Amp - the resident GFY anarchist. you're my hero.

I'm gonna tell 'em straight up.... guilty or innocent, doesn't matter to me... whatever gets me the fuck out of there the fastest.

Amp.. just tell them that you believe "Everyone is GUILTY, until proven otherwise, cuz if you were stopped, or arrested, you obviously did something wrong to attract the attention of the police!" They will tell you to get the fuck out of their court room and never come back, like they did to my buddy who did that in Hayward.. :1orglaugh

hmmm.... good point there. Maybe I should just tell 'em my brother is a cop so, naturally I am biased toward the side of the police. Most definately guilty until proven innocent. :thumbsup

How many read the title and thought hmm I wonder how well that would convert?

That's priceless! :1orglaugh