Fawk!! - Warning too much information in this post
 

Ok,

Just had one of those nights!

1.Went to a resturant with some friends.

2. Got hooked up with a guy.... kind of a blind date.

3. Guy is good looking we hit it off... I'm a big girl.. I figure I'm going to get laid.

4. After dinner the guy excuses himself.. Has other things to do. (Turns out he is gay.. Imagine the odds in Paris.) Fine I have a shower massage... not the first time and won't be the last.

5. On the metro I start to feel sicky. Turns out the roast beef I ate was bad.

6. Thank heavens it was late at night. I crap myself on the metro.

7. Get home... sit on the toilet for 30 mins and have a shower. Clean up and put my dirty clothes in the laundry.

8. Go to bed... what a fucking lousy night.

9. Get up this morning... I ruined the new expensive white linen bed sheets I recently purchased... I got my period a week early.

If this message grossed you out or pissed you off....
GOOD!!!!! It makes me feel better!

thanks for the info, sorry you didn't get laid.

you just did an entire skit of 99% of the female comedians. :1orglaugh

Like we need to know this shit! Buy some diapers and always wear one and you wouldn't have shit your pants or fucked up your sheets.

:thumbsup

post pics

Yea Yell at ME! Get pissed off that you read my post! Give me your pain!!!!
It makes me happy to see your mind suffer!!!!

OK, I'll play...
You're a terrible terrible person and you deserve every crappy roast beef sandwich you ever get. I am scarred for life by the images triggered by this thread and it's all your fault! I hope you can live with yourself and just so you know, just like your date you turned me gay too!

:upsidedow

:Oh crap This thread makes baby jesus cry.

You crapped yourself?

Damn.

I dont want to hear that from a girl.

As far as i know girls dont shit...aight? Let alone crap their pants.

C'mon Franck, who did you think all those rows of the pink packs of Depends in Walmart were for? Pooping queens? :upsidedow

Thank you! You made me laugh!!
I can have a good day now making people around me miserable.

In the way that only a Jewish-Quebec'r on her period living amoungst cowardly gay frenchmen can.

How old are you painintheass?

Dont ze french drive you nuts? I usually cant stay there longer than 1 week.

Are you *******?

35, Divorced with 2 mostly grown sons, streatch marks and my own house with no mortgage.

Hmmmm well at least your honest.

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh
ok ok.. so tell us...

was it the squishy kind of poop? did it squish up into your fish hole to? and squirt out the top of yer asscrack?

hahaha fuck i'm dying here

You talk about shitting yourself with no problems....& you like to torment people.

You're my kinda girl...hit me up sometime ; )

I would never crap myself in the metro

I've been here for some time and they are just now starting to really piss me off. (Hey after my ex-husband I have the patience of a saint.)

« Le vrai Français » have the mannerisms of little old ladies.

They are the biggest racists I have ever met in my life. (The KKK and Nazis can take lessons from them) They treat even people from other french speaking nations with disdain.

And I'm in the land of being able to make piss and fisting videos. But good fucking luck getting any of the girls to do it. Hell.... A barging chip with them is the promise to NOT put them on the box cover.

"Shit half the time I get a girl by telling her that the photos and footage is NOT for diffusion.. Just personal use" They still sign the release and I use the footage.

I don't bother to distribute in france anymore... The fucking paperwork just isn't worth it. For each dollar I make here I can make 30 in another country with less work.

I'm actually working toward shutting down operations here and leaving. I've thought about Germany but I don't speak German.

LOL "Up into my fish hole" thats funny.

No it was more like the worst wet fart on record. Just enough for me to stand up because I was worried it might soak through to my skirt.

"Shit half the time I get a girl by telling her that the photos and footage is NOT for diffusion.. Just personal use" They still sign the release and I use the footage.


Will you marry me?

How about I just fuck you a couple of times and you can just give me half of what you own up front.

You are disgusting and vile.

Look on the bright side, you didn't get a potato stuck up your ass.

Im just a little curious. aRe yuou sure the guy was gay or did he just intuitively know what a painintheass you are and know the fucked up shit that was gonna go down?

Sure, you can have half my debt for a couple good fucks. But you can't have half my weed.

Not up on divorce or seperation. Debt before the fucking remains with the person that incurrs it.

As for you weed.... keep it. Been there.. done that.. It's a waste of money.

Bigger kick is to watch people who are stoned make idiots of themself.

Gay - strike one
Period - strike two
Shit self - strike three

Yer Out!

This thread is worthless without pics...

Now what the fuck am I supposed to take a photo of?

My panties in the clothes basket?
My stained bedsheets?
My streatch marks?

Like dude... get a clue.

All of the above. People will pay for it, maybe you have a new niche, fat women who shit themselves while on the rag.

:( Im sure somewhere theres a niche and a fucking site for it.. My guess would be somewhere hosted in Russia :1orglaugh

She must be new to GFY

Testing New Sig

Sounds like the makings of a high rated made for TV movie.

ew. That kills off any ideas for a paysite.

I'm breast-less and streatch marked... Not fat.

If you're going to insult me... Get it right! :1orglaugh

Big as in 400 pounder?



He's not gay, it was just a nice way to say "fuck off"



Sounds like you've done it before.



You didnt shower first? So you smeared shit all over the toilet?




Linen is exspensive? Since when?

Stretch marks eh? so you USED to be a big girl and then lost weight quick eh?

http://www.dumpstersluts.com/dump/20...208/ugly07.jpg



eh? eh?

LOL.... you guys Rock!

No I'm not a 400 pounder. The best way to describe myself is this.. And I'll do it in imperial for ya's.

I'm short.. really short. I try to claim 5 foot tall. But I don't have the courage to look at the tape measure. And if I weigh 100 pounds soaking wet I would be amazed. I'm pretty fucking scrawny by any standard.

My chest is flat. So friggin flat that there are greater hills in Saskatchewan. Fuck I'm still waiting for my first bra. And I breast fed and all that happen was I got bigger brown rings. The pregnant boob enlargement fairy never visted me.

I have stretch marks. Big ones. I gave birth to two boys and each one was over 9 pounds. And like all french women when I was pregant the only place I got fat was my stomache.

I had to use a mirror to see my feet. Shit midgets could stand under my stomach to hide from the rain was how big my stomach was. But I had penci thin legs and arms and it was a miracle I didn constantly topple over during my pregnancys.

Yea I shit myself before. Haven't done it in years and the last time I did I was pissed drunk and got my head beat in.

yea I did sit on the toilet first. It was better than letting it all fall out of my ass and on my bathroom floor. Because afterall, I would be the one that had to clean it up.

And it's obvious your a guy because if you were a woman you might know that 120 thread linen is expensive. But I bet you didn't even know that linen comes in different qualities.

Actually, youd be surprised, we have some of the biggest fairies in the world on this board, Juicy, school this lady on bed sheets.

Opps typo... 220 thread

nice story :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

finally - A woman that isn't worried about being politically correct!

Nice to meet you PITA, I'm the COF (cranky old fart) known as vicki ;)

im enjoying your attitude over here painintheass! :thumbsup

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh