| Michael2017K |
04-16-2005 11:51 PM |
You have all been scammed into believing Julian actully owns underwear. I have researched Ms. Sosa and I found something extremely questionable.
Let me tell you my life story. After many years as a PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR I have learned to trust nobody but my partner Al. Al grew up in a small neighborhood in Queens, NY. The big city. He then moved to Cleveland. Yes the big city. He was a sheisty little m^ther focker. When he was just 11 years old he reached the weight of 290lb! He was taller than the average hooligan. Us kids used to make fun of him and call him mean names like the jolly green giant or igor. But anyways, let's cut to the chase.
That is irrelevant to the reason you are reading this. The real question is "WHY IS HE MY PARTNER?". Well I'll tell you why. Me and big Al were fierce enemies. We had duels in the school playground. We brought real guns to these massive events. My good buddy was a trustworthy admission collector. He was TicketMaster of our events. He was in control of some 1,900 peasants at our events.
12 years old and in the sixth grade me and my associates have already established the biggest underground gambling ring right in the heart of our city.
We have never been uncovered. The school officials knew something was up. They could smell it. They smelled the stench that would radiate from our dirty sweaty souless bodies after recess and we would always be thrown against the block wall. Well back to the chase, me and big Al had scheduled a duel. It was on a Wednesday. Pizza day.
I remember that lunch. We used to love those pizzas even though they were absolute crap. It was possibly the worst. Their meat was made of muslims. It was TOTAL CRAP. Disgusting. Kids were always in the school nurses office. Well anyways BACK TO THE DUEL! We rushed at 11:20 AM on the HOTTEST Wednesday of the year. I was sweating, he was was melting. I pull the dog out of my holster before he could ever get to his.
He had a MASSIVE heat stroke and couldn't get that thing in his mouth MEANWHILE I ravaged the HOTDOG LIKE A BEAST. I stand beside my fellow bosom buddies declaring victory! VICTORY!
Meanwhile the school guards had called an ambulance to help Allen out. He had not only a stroke but because of his MASSIVE weight he almost died from a heart attack at the age of only 12. I said ALMOST! Meanwhile me and my clansmembers celebrated the victory with the pizza feast arranged by the lunch masters. The meal was downed with fine pint of whole chocolate milk. ehhh yea i went to the office and told em i was sick. That hotdog and the massive lunch our lunch masters had prepared for us was just too much. I puked when I got home and felt better :)
After all that I commanded my mother to drive the chariot to the Hospital and carry me to LITTLE ALLENS ROOM. Once I step foot beside his bed I declared VICTORY again! I said "I defeat thy Al as he lay as a cow-ard HAHAHA"
Well anyways I felt bad about his massive obesity at such a young age. But I liked him better after that gastric bypass surgery. We became good friends through the mideval school years and through HIGH school. We went to the police academy together. After a couple years on the force we started a Private Investigators firm. It's like working at Google except we RISK OUR LIVES. We do bounty and repo work on the side.
Now, we have come to the standard and conclusive conclusion that Ms. Sosa does not wear underwear. So to be fair she would have to post nude pictures of herself. yep...
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