So I just woke up, and I remember one of my dreams......
I was invited to go on some kind of Playboy/Adult yachy cruise on the Chow Praya river in Bangkok. It was a small yacht, but large enough to hold plenty of fun.
I scoured the top deck looking for girls who were ready to party, but only found disinterested people mingling and warming up to the party with their cocktails.
So I move down to the lower deck, and magically I am in the living room of
the house I grew up in. To my right is the sliding glass door that led to the backyard, to my right is the hallway that leads to the downstairs bathroom, and in front of me is the back of the couch where my mother is watching TV, aware of what I am doing - but more aware of the television.
Through the sliding glass door I see two girls who are looking at me like I am a glass of water in the Sahara. One is plain, but undeniably cute (think Bailey from
Bailey's Room), and the other is her dimply cousin (think
Banana Brandy). They both stroll over, and by the time they get to me I am on my back, naked, they're naked, and
they both go to work on smokin' my pole.
They both climb a little higher on my body so I can wrap my hands around and get a good middle finger inside each of their assholes at the same time. But their assholes are DRY - like they've been lined with that brown paper grocery bag you get at supermarkets. Crinkled, rough, and funnel shaped. But, FUCK IT, I've got two hot girls, and
I'm going to finger their dry, brown paper assholes.
The girl on the left makes a funny sound in her stomach. Suddenly, her asshole isn't dry anymore. In fact, my finger is the only thing preventing it from becoming
a complete shit geyser. I decide the warm goo that has now assaulted my left middle finger is too much, and I pull out.
She unleashes a string of foul excrement all over the floor! About 30 thin
ballpoint-pen-sized pieces of shit in a puddle of ass gravy! Both girls - VERY humiliated, run down the hall to the bathroom. I know I need to clean it up before anyone on the couch notices - so I jump into the kitchen and grab the newspaper and some carpet cleaner. It's not long before whole mess is cleaned up.
Afterwards, I follow the girls outside - and the location is changed to an outdoor street market near my current house.
The girls disappear into the crowd, as if we'd just parted from seeing a movie together, and I light up a cigarette and think to myself, "What a Wondeful World."
Here's what I'm thinking....mixing gin, vodka, and a pack of old menthols I found in a jacket pocket don't make for the best nightcap........
