Now left handed people can enjoy girly/gay/boyalley art without having to turn around those satanic right-handed mugs EVER AGAIN! Enjoy a blissful purple frilly flower or comical text or any number of gay things imaginable.... oh fuck it I can't even fake how retarded this product is. It's a fucking MUG with imagery printed on the otherwise. Wow, thanks. Awesome. Great. I could NEVER GET THROUGH LIFE WITHOUT THIS FUCKING THING. God damn it I'm going to buy three of these and crush them up into a fine porcelain powder and snort it all.
Alright, a product that fat people can use to make themselves sweat more! Awesome, way to go television, you've sold me another useless product and I can't wait to use it! OK seriously if I was retarded enough to try this product I would at least make sure it plugged into a wall so I can go ahead and kill my fat self by jumping into a tub of water. The only way this thing is going to make you lose weight is if it shocks the fuck out of you every time you try to grab a donut... fuck, this item is more retarded than a blind person owning a big screen TV.
OK, so maybe that was a little harsh on goths because not even those pasty white mother fuckers would be able to handle carrying one of these things around. This product just oozes stupidity and honestly when the fuck are you going to use it? Halloween? So you are to buy this $20+ novelty item for just one day and you can only use it that one day, once a year? If I catch anybody with one of these things I'm going to shove a stun gun inside their ass and leave it on until the batteries wear out.
Oh sweet chocolate covered Jesus, was this really a product we needed to see in our lifetime? If you needed proof that human beings get stupider as they get fatter LOOK NO FURTHER than this terrific product of twinkie flavored lip balm. Now you can treat your chapped lips and gain a few pounds at the same time, you can never get enough of that delicious twinkie flavoring. Fuck it, am I the only one that thinks this is a pretty great idea? I want ALL consumer products to be twinkie flavored, from toothpaste to vitamins.
Women! Aren't you tired of spending hours on end trying to find that perfect position just to take a piss? SQUAT NO MORE! With the SheWee now you too can have the ultimate pleasure that only a man can by standing up and relieving your bladder! NO LONGER will you be forced to sit on cold porcelain or even remotely care about your health or even be sanitary. Best of all it's reusable! You can piss in this thing over and over and over until you die from a severe bladder infection! Could this product be ANY BETTER? COULD IT? Well then other than it not existing at all?
Yes, now you too can take your pet to Mt. Everest and beyond! This all terrain pet stroller comes with 1/16" solid steel armor plating, an advanced security system that is bark or purr activated when the dog or cat is in danger and more! You can store cups, cell phones, and KEYS IN IT! KEYS! With the All Terrain AT3 Pet Stroller, you can manage to make everyone think you are completely insane and make your pet look stylish while doing it! BUY SEVEN TODAY!
