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-   -   Tell me ladies, why do so many women walk alone at night? (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=833526)

CDSmith 06-08-2008 05:51 AM

Tell me ladies, why do so many women walk alone at night?
 
That's a question that has been on my mind of late. After seeing several news articles, one about an 11 yr old girl walking on a road in rural Manitoba getting raped and killed last year, then a 14 yr old in the city, and several others about women getting raped or otherwise assaulted while walking to their car after work, or while walking through a dark poorly lit park at night alone, and of course the thousands upon thousands of rapes going on across every city and town in N. America... PLUS the fact that in the USA alone a rape occurs every two minutes.

Isn't that enough to at least take some measure and get someone to walk with you or phone for someone to come and pick you up?

Yet every night there they are, women out walking alone. I find it unbelievable. For instance, I take long walks usually quite early in the morning, and sometimes late in the evening. My usual route passes me through several parks and down along the riverbank close to downtown. I often pass lone women walking, and have noticed that they often glance very nervously at me as I pass. Now granted, I'm a big gronk of a guy, but the fact is I'm the one guy that they can feel safe with, but of course they don't know that. But shouldn't that twinge of fear in and of itself be enough to scare them into having more sense in their heads? It obviously doesn't.

Now, some women will say they like their freedom, and don't want to lower that freedom by having to call someone or have someone hold their hand every time they have to walk to their car. To that I say yes, better to risk getting assaulted rather than curb your "freedom as a woman" that .01%. Sarcastic, yes... but is it not true? Would that rape statistic not be at least somewhat lowered if women would stop walking alone at night?

Ladies, do you think nothing at all of just heading out the door alone whenever you feel like it?

What is the general consensus on this?

I realize most rapes are done by someone known to the victim, in fact in reported cases it's over 70%. But I also know that around 60% of all sexual assaults go unreported. The stat that surprised me the most is that only about 6% of rapists actually do any prison time.

Source here: http://www.rainn.org/statistics

Zuzana Designs 06-08-2008 07:07 AM

I won't walk alone at night and I don't use parking garages. When I worked in the mall when I was younger and didn't leave until 10pm with a big dark parking lot, I had pepper spray in my hand or had another employer walk with me. I was in early highschool in Sacramento, CA when the big "Second-Story Rapist" shit was going on, so my parents made sure I didn't take any risks. I'd rather give up a little "freedom" and be safe. Besides, if I'm the one being careful I'm still in control of that freedom. If I give that power into a rapists hands, I've lost all freedom I have.

CDSmith 06-08-2008 07:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zuzana Designs (Post 14293341)
Besides, if I'm the one being careful I'm still in control of that freedom. If I give that power into a rapists hands, I've lost all freedom I have.

Incredibly good point.

raven1083 06-08-2008 07:49 AM

I hate to walk alone at night! I'm scared

LadyMischief 06-08-2008 08:06 AM

I only walk alone at night with my dogs. Aside from my own ability to take care of myself (self-defense courses and some kickboxing) as sweet as my dogs are they would kick the ass of ANYONE who tried to hurt me.... man, animal or anything.

VikingMan 06-08-2008 08:41 AM

Young girls buy into the rubbish idea they "don't need a guy around" and many of the guys they do pick to date are total cowards. These west coast guys are REALLY cowards for the *most* part. On top of being cowards they give old senile women a run for them money in the gossip department. Totally pathetic excuses for "men" IMO. I guess it has something to do with them not ever having a father in their lives. Los Angeles is not as bad as places like Seattle. Seattle is full of total pussies. Don't even try to deny that because if you do then you have either never been there or have blinders on.

Where I grew up in Colorado if a girl was even disrespected verbally the entire neighborhood would pummel any offending douchebags within an inch of their lives. I can think of countless times I left guys bleeding on the street and even sometimes I was the one left bleeding.:1orglaugh I am not tough guy that is for sure and have had my ass kicked many times but I would still fight regardless because that is how I was raised by my father and older relatives.

I have a place in Venice, Ca and 99% of the guys there are complete cowards and many of the women would be angry at you for defending them against a verbal assault:2 cents:

I know this may make me sound like a monster but at this point a woman would have to be my good friend in order for me to defend her. If I was driving down the street now and saw some random female being attacked I would merely dial 911. I doubt I would get out and risk my life. Sad because this goes against everthing I was taught as a child.

Several years ago one of my friends tried to defend a girl who was being beat up outside a bar by her boyfriend. The douchebags friends joined in and beat my friend up to the point he was never the same mentaly. I bet that girl continued to date her loser boyfriend.

Monique Niccole 06-08-2008 08:44 AM

Some women don't have someone to call to walk them where ever they have to go at night. If there's no one there to call and you have to go where you have to go, what do you do? Suck it up and walk like a big girl.

That said, there are some things I just don't do alone at night (using the ATM outside, etc.)

CDSmith 06-08-2008 09:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Afrekete (Post 14293477)
If there's no one there to call and you have to go where you have to go, what do you do? Suck it up and walk like a big girl.

Or, you can do whatever you have to do during daylight hours... or just suck it up and not go. No milk in the house? I say tough shit, it can wait til tomorrow. Sounds awful I know, but I don't see it as living in fear so much as I see it as just knowing what goes on out there in the world and doing something to help prevent it from happening to you.

Monique Niccole 06-08-2008 09:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14293522)
Or, you can do whatever you have to do during daylight hours... or just suck it up and not go. No milk in the house? I say tough shit, it can wait til tomorrow. Sounds awful I know, but I don't see it as living in fear so much as I see it as just knowing what goes on out there in the world and doing something to help prevent it from happening to you.

I'm not advocating skipping around town at 3 am for something frivolous, but what if you worked late and have to walk from your office to the train or your car to your building? I'm definitely not about to shut myself in at 8pm just because I don't have someone to escort me where I need to go.

You can drive yourself nuts worrying about what could, possibly, maybe happen or you can go and live your life. I'm as safe as possible, but I'm not about to give criminals and rapists that much power over my life.

CDSmith 06-08-2008 09:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Afrekete (Post 14293575)
I'm not advocating skipping around town at 3 am for something frivolous, but what if you worked late and have to walk from your office to the train or your car to your building? I'm definitely not about to shut myself in at 8pm just because I don't have someone to escort me where I need to go.

You can drive yourself nuts worrying about what could, possibly, maybe happen or you can go and live your life. I'm as safe as possible, but I'm not about to give criminals and rapists that much power over my life.

I thought it was illegal for companies/stores to have a female worker alone on duty past a certain time of night? I'm pretty sure it is where I am. Employers have to provide a ride home, or other co-workers to walk each other to their cars etc.

Like I said earlier, there are those who talk about freedom and just living their life carefree, but I've known way too many women who used to be like that until they got assaulted. Now they don't go out alone.

Angry Jew Cat - Banned for Life 06-08-2008 09:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ******* (Post 14293472)
Several years ago one of my friends tried to defend a girl who was being beat up outside a bar by her boyfriend. The douchebags friends joined in and beat my friend up to the point he was never the same mentaly. I bet that girl continued to date her loser boyfriend.

It's that sort of female mentality that has lost all my respect for women.

miss_bellabellini 06-08-2008 09:41 AM

Research shows that women are most likely to be sexually assaulted and abused by those closest to them, like partners, friends, and family. So you aren't necessarily safe in your home. Women should be able to walk alone at night because we should be confident to live our lives with freedom while at the same time listening to our intuition and keeping our eyes wide open.

RayBonga 06-08-2008 11:34 AM

No idea rape and assaults on women were so common in the US.

Where I live most girls wouldn't have any problems leaving alone from work late (say 10-12 pm). Strange, I thought this would be a big problem in latin America and Africa but not on the US.

Ayla_SquareTurtle 06-08-2008 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14293601)
I thought it was illegal for companies/stores to have a female worker alone on duty past a certain time of night?

I've never heard of anything like that in my whole life.

Afrekete summed it up well. Some women don't have the privilege of deciding not to walk at certain times of the night.

Obviously, it SHOULD be 100% safe to walk at any time of the day or night even for children, but here in the real world, that's just now how things work. That being said, there is a balance to be found between being careful and alert and being a paranoid shut in.

I live in an area where pretty much everyone has a car, so if you are walking, you are essentially alone except for drivers on the road. I wouldn't want to walk around here at night by myself personally, but I do see people doing it at times, both men and women. Now in a city like NYC or the bay area? Yes I would walk alone at night in areas I was familiar and comfortable with. I would be more safe than I would have been here in mostly driving area, but something could still happen.

CDSmith 06-08-2008 12:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by miss_bellabellini (Post 14293619)
Research shows that women are most likely to be sexually assaulted and abused by those closest to them, like partners, friends, and family. So you aren't necessarily safe in your home. Women should be able to walk alone at night because we should be confident to live our lives with freedom while at the same time listening to our intuition and keeping our eyes wide open.

You're right, but I did already include that fact in my first post. I know full well that the stats say most women (in fact over 70% of REPORTED cases) are committed by someone close to them... but, I also cited the stat that says over 60% of all sexual assaults go unreported. That tells me there may very well be (and probably is) a lot more cases of rape occuring with women walking along, probably mostly at night or in areas they really should be alone in.

In an ideal world you're right, women SHOULD be able to walk alone and be confident to "live out your lives with freedom" etc... but in case you're unaware of it this isn't an ideal world.


By the way I should mention here, self defense items such as tasers and pepper spray are illegal where I am. Only cops are allowed to carry and use them. What are the laws on that where you are? (you as in everyone reading this)

What self defense weapons are legal where you are?

CDSmith 06-08-2008 12:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ayla_SquareTurtle (Post 14293934)
I've never heard of anything like that in my whole life.

Well now you have.

It's a labor law here in Manitoba (where I'm from). Maybe it's something that should be looked into in other areas, what do you think?

Ayla_SquareTurtle 06-08-2008 12:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14293949)
Well now you have.

It's a labor law here in Manitoba (where I'm from). Maybe it's something that should be looked into in other areas, what do you think?

Honestly, I wouldn't mind seeing some sort of escort system in place for all employees, male or female. If you want someone to walk you to the train, your car or whatever, you get it, no questions asked. The one job I had where I worked at night offered escorts out to your car and also had a buddy system where you would walk out with the same group each night. I've found that it's pretty easy to get someone to walk out with you if you ask, but some people may not even think of it.

Ayla_SquareTurtle 06-08-2008 12:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angry Jew Cat (Post 14293610)
It's that sort of female mentality that has lost all my respect for women.

Trash comes in all flavors.

Jman 06-08-2008 01:01 PM

Hehehe maybe I should put up an add on craigslist as a chick walker.

You pay me i'll walk with you :-D

Monique Niccole 06-08-2008 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14293601)
I thought it was illegal for companies/stores to have a female worker alone on duty past a certain time of night? I'm pretty sure it is where I am. Employers have to provide a ride home, or other co-workers to walk each other to their cars etc.

There isn't a law like that in the US. When I worked in an office in Brickell (Miami), I would often work late and be the last person out of our office. No security in the building and I would walk a few blocks to get to my car or about an equal distance to get to the the Metrorail. Brickell is a busy business area during the day, but at night the area is pretty deserted.

There are plenty of single, working women who are required to do the same thing every day.

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14293943)
By the way I should mention here, self defense items such as tasers and pepper spray are illegal where I am. Only cops are allowed to carry and use them. What are the laws on that where you are? (you as in everyone reading this)

What self defense weapons are legal where you are?

We can carry pepper spray here and I think (someone correct me if I'm wrong) tazers are okay too. When I lived in Miami, I carried a keychain pepper spray, but I don't carry anything anymore since I'm in a more suburban area.

nosey 06-08-2008 01:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jean-Francois (Post 14294002)
Hehehe maybe I should put up an add on craigslist as a chick walker.

You pay me i'll walk with you :-D

:1orglaugh :thumbsup

baddog 06-08-2008 01:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14293601)
I thought it was illegal for companies/stores to have a female worker alone on duty past a certain time of night? I'm pretty sure it is where I am.

If it was ever a requirement here, you can thank women's lib for it being illegal to discriminate against women like that.

Quote:

Employers have to provide a ride home, or other co-workers to walk each other to their cars etc.
I hope that is a joke. If not, is that part of Socialism? Would this be something we could look forward to if Obama was elected?

baddog 06-08-2008 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14293949)
Well now you have.

It's a labor law here in Manitoba (where I'm from). Maybe it's something that should be looked into in other areas, what do you think?

I think employment laws would be violated when employers started not hiring women because they can't work at night.

CDSmith 06-08-2008 06:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by baddog (Post 14294100)
I think employment laws would be violated when employers started not hiring women because they can't work at night.

Nope, it's a safety issue. You can't, for example, put a female staffer on all night alone working your gas bar here. It's begging for trouble so employers aren't allowed to do it. Period.

And I agree with it.

baddog 06-08-2008 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14294827)
Nope, it's a safety issue. You can't, for example, put a female staffer on all night alone working your gas bar here. It's begging for trouble so employers aren't allowed to do it. Period.

And I agree with it.

Violates so many laws here it isn't even funny.

CDSmith 06-08-2008 07:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by baddog (Post 14294834)
Violates so many laws here it isn't even funny.

Too many young girls have been raped and killed working alone at night over the years, it was time to change those laws.

So that's what we did.

Because they needed changing.


Tell me, would you seriously be able to sleep at night knowing that your daughter was working alone nights at some inner city convenience store or gas bar etc? I doubt I'd be able to, having been out and around the city late at night all these years and knowing what I know about what can and does happen out there.

baddog 06-08-2008 07:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14294856)
Tell me, would you seriously be able to sleep at night knowing that your daughter was working alone nights at some inner city convenience store or gas bar etc? I doubt I'd be able to, having been out and around the city late at night all these years and knowing what I know about what can and does happen out there.

Dude, you obviously do not know what my daughter does for a living. She has been fucking kidnapped in the course of her employment.

Trust me, my daughter is in plenty of danger, 5 days a week,

wyldblyss 06-08-2008 07:23 PM

Where I live we have at least the illusion of safety. We have a walking trail along the lake outside my door and yes I have walked alone on it at night, but it has always been when there are still people on it going for walks in the evening.

st0ned 06-08-2008 07:32 PM

Maybe to pick up...err get picked up by...some random guy?? :winkwink:

CDSmith 06-08-2008 07:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by baddog (Post 14294862)
Dude, you obviously do not know what my daughter does for a living. She has been fucking kidnapped in the course of her employment.

Trust me, my daughter is in plenty of danger, 5 days a week,

So my question stands, and no, I had no way of knowing what your daughter does. You've never talked about her to me.

I'm not sure why you seem to be goiing against me on this, my whole position in this thread (and those local labor laws I mentioned) are FOR better protection for women. How is that a bad thing?

J. Falcon 06-08-2008 07:39 PM

Why live in fear?

baddog 06-08-2008 07:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14294881)
(and those local labor laws I mentioned) are FOR better protection for women. How is that a bad thing?

When I worked at McDonald's back in 68, women could not work there. Know why?

Because the potatoes for french fries were fresh and came in 50 pound bags. Women were not allowed to lift over 25 pounds, ergo, could not work at McDonald's.

Ayla_SquareTurtle 06-08-2008 07:45 PM

Protecting people is an admirable goal, but it does need to be done in a way which doesn't end up limiting people in other ways. For example, what if a woman is the most qualified candidate for a promotion at her office, but the new position would require her to stay late one night per week and close up the office by herself. Should she just get stuck, never able to advance? Should the company have to pay for two employees to do a job which only takes one to do properly? I think there's a better way.

CDSmith 06-08-2008 07:45 PM

And that has to do with this law...how? That law was probably changed over time, no? Did any of those potato sacks rape and kill any women? I doubt it.

I honestly don't get you sometimes dude. :D

tony286 06-08-2008 07:49 PM

one night my wife and I were going home from the diner and on 41 which was dark and empty its 1am.There was this hot blonde chick running in short running shorts. I thought to myself, this girl must have a 9mm in her waist band or is a kung fu expert because the area she was running is pretty barren at night. She could scream her head off and no one would hear where she was.

CDSmith 06-08-2008 07:50 PM

Simple question: Would you want your 18 yr old daughter working the night shift at a stop n shop or any small convenience store or gas bar etc in a downtown area of pretty much any big city?

I know I wouldn't. I have two neices that age and would be worried sick if either took that kind of job. Too many young girls have been raped and murdered in the past while working at such places. I recall back in the 80's a girl here was raped and killed while working alone at a donut shop. That case sparked the issue and set the wheels in motion for the change in labor laws we now have.

I don't know how any sane person, especially a parent of all people, would argue with me about it.

baddog 06-08-2008 07:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14294908)
And that has to do with this law...how? That law was probably changed over time, no? Did any of those potato sacks rape and kill any women? I doubt it.

I honestly don't get you sometimes dude. :D

Women's lib came along and said it was illegal to discriminate against women, and they could lift 50 pound sacks as easily as men could.

The point was that the law that prevented women from being able to work at McDonald's was there to protect them from injury.

See how laws meant to do one thing can have repercussions?

collegeboobies 06-08-2008 07:52 PM

They have an urge to get raped obviously.

J. Falcon 06-08-2008 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by baddog (Post 14294898)
When I worked at McDonald's back in 68, women could not work there. Know why?

Because the potatoes for french fries were fresh and came in 50 pound bags. Women were not allowed to lift over 25 pounds, ergo, could not work at McDonald's.

So does that mean if Obama becomes president they will outlaw french fries at McDonalds? :1orglaugh:1orglaugh

CDSmith 06-08-2008 07:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by baddog (Post 14294917)
Women's lib came along and said it was illegal to discriminate against women, and they could lift 50 pound sacks as easily as men could.

The point was that the law that prevented women from being able to work at McDonald's was there to protect them from injury.

See how laws meant to do one thing can have repercussions?

Funny as hit sounds, I recall not one women's libber arguing or otherwise putting up any kind of fuss when the laws here were changed.

I think the young girl found dead in the washroom of that donut shop back in '84 had something to do with it.

CDSmith 06-08-2008 08:07 PM

Fucking Baddog, unreal, he's STILL arguing with me about this labor law and all it's finer points etc.

Dude, just think of it in terms of safety for a young girl in your family that you care about. It keeps them SAFER, how can you not understand that? Some laws are designed to do that even though it may curtail your freedoms a bit, like seatbelt laws, helmet laws etc. They're designed to save lives, this one is no different.

Obviously if it comes up for a vote in your state you are going to vote against it. Gread, do that.

rowan 06-08-2008 08:08 PM

Looking at it from another angle... I've sometimes wandered (usually in a car) into situations where I'm not sure if I'd be helping by stopping, or just scaring the girl more. Like a guy walking half a block behind a girl, could be entirely innocent, could be something else. What does a stranger say to a girl so as not to freak her out totally, and make it clear you're trying to help?

baddog 06-08-2008 08:15 PM

You lost me. You guys voted on a labor law? Interesting. I guess I missed the post where you mentioned that. When did this happen? Link?

J. Falcon 06-08-2008 08:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rowan (Post 14294956)
Looking at it from another angle... I've sometimes wandered (usually in a car) into situations where I'm not sure if I'd be helping by stopping, or just scaring the girl more. Like a guy walking half a block behind a girl, could be entirely innocent, could be something else. What does a stranger say to a girl so as not to freak her out totally, and make it clear you're trying to help?

My wife once had her car die down on a dark part of a highway, and as she was running (not walking) to the nearest gas station, a car pulled up beside her. The guy must have sensed that she might be alarmed at a man stoping to help her, so he said something to the effect of "Do you need some help? Don't be scared, I'm a family man, I'm riding with here with my daughters" And his daughters were in the backseat. My wife got in the car and he drove her to the gas station.

So yeah, even when you're trying to help someone you should take caution. A person in distress may not understand your intentions, especially a women on a dark highway. :2 cents:

Rorschach 06-08-2008 08:18 PM

It shouldn't even be called rape if a woman walks around late at night, her firm body barely concealed by her flimsy outfit. If you tease a man for long enough, he's going to take what he wants.

CDSmith 06-08-2008 08:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by baddog (Post 14294973)
You lost me. You guys voted on a labor law? Interesting. I guess I missed the post where you mentioned that. When did this happen? Link?

You know what I mean. Don't you 'mericuns sometimes have campaigns like "Vote no to bill c-62" or something? If it's a proposed law such as this, a regional labor law for example don't they sometimes let people have an opinion on whether or not they want it?

Stop nit-picking with the argument man. :D

baddog 06-08-2008 08:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CDSmith (Post 14294979)
You know what I mean. Don't you 'mericuns sometimes have campaigns like "Vote no to bill c-62" or something? If it's a proposed law such as this, a regional labor law for example don't they sometimes let people have an opinion on whether or not they want it?

I can not remember any time that any campaign to modify a labor law was launched, and I used to be very involved with my union.

Not nitpicking, looking for facts. So, link to the law? Did it pass? When?

J. Falcon 06-08-2008 08:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rorschach (Post 14294977)
It shouldn't even be called rape if a woman walks around late at night, her firm body barely concealed by her flimsy outfit. If you tease a man for long enough, he's going to take what he wants.

HUH??? :Oh crap

CDSmith 06-08-2008 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by baddog (Post 14294981)
. So, link to the law? Did it pass? When?

Oh shit, I live here man, I know about this law, that's all. Look up the province of Manitoba labor laws if you must, and pour through all that they have online if you don't want to take my word for it.

Maybe I should round up a few cabinet ministers from the legislative building to post so you can feel like you believe me.

Fuck.

CDSmith 06-08-2008 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rorschach (Post 14294977)
It shouldn't even be called rape if a woman walks around late at night, her firm body barely concealed by her flimsy outfit. If you tease a man for long enough, he's going to take what he wants.

Ladies and gentlemen I give you exhibit 1, the perfect reason why women should not walk alone at night.

Fucking chilling post dude.


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