Zomg I am drunk and lonely and the diet isn't working
 

Oh well I tried to change my diet to change my attitude but so far I am very weak, and still stuffing myself with angus and brie.

I am very very lonely.. and i am telling you all because you're like my family.. There's the old fucks (baddog), the retarded cousins (carlothegimpo), the pervert uncles (dirty frank), the huggable aunties (polish), and the wierd second-cousin slut girls (everyone else)..

So, help me, dear family, before I erm... become a senator.

:Oh crap:Oh crap how did you know it was vodka?

Sigmund Freud says: "When drunk and lonely don't call a friend, call a hooker".

Drop the bottle!

Bro, you need a girl

I like it!:thumbsup

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

It sounds like you're really frustrated with your current situation. What kinds of things do you like to do (besides having brie and drinking vodka)? Maybe that could be a good place to start thinking about stuff you could do that involves meeting people...

Get rid of all that shitty food in your apartment and fill it up with vegetables and negative calories type food (like a ton of celery). Next, hire a trainer and start working out. You have no motivation, so might as well hire somebody to give it to you. Give yourself 90 days and don't puss out.

you never know when someone is serious here or not

but as a favorite member of your family, I'm telling you to change your life
go exercise, go jogging (i just did it, even though im 45 lbs overweight, getting tired very fast, and risk a heart attack :error)

try to be more focused, make more money, or just change industries, get a job in real life, could be more fun, even if it pays less

you may try some meds temporarly as well

oh and get laid (but not with your hand) :winkwink:

oh and be more positive

let's start with this:

say 3 good things about this man:


http://marucha.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/obama.jpg


... yes, you can do it!

don't listen to a word polish_aristodork says, guy is a complete toolbag and probably has a worse life than you

Start by eating one less shitty thing a day, and go from there. And cut back on the liquor LOL :thumbsup

by the way, the best way to get ripped is to have an exercise buddy