Some funny things said in courtrooms
 

http://rinkworks.com/said/courtroom.shtml
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Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all?"
Witness: "Yes."
Lawyer: "And in what ways does it affect your memory?"
Witness: "I forget."
Lawyer: "You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?"


Lawyer: "What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?"
Witness: "He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'"
Lawyer: "And why did that upset you?"
Witness: "My name is Susan."

now this is funny:

* Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?"

The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.

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There is some great ones in there for sure

hahahahahaha lol

* Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?"
* Witness: "Gucci sweats and Reeboks."

:1orglaugh

old but funny :)

Now that was funny I needed a good laugh:thumbsup

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

when asked why 2 Live Crew song about raping a girl was art, Henry Louis Gates Jr told the judge

whites are not capable of understanding black art or appreciating it. and the only reason white people find this song about raping a young girl obscene is white racism"

http://www.congratstothewinners.com/...live-crew.html

even the judge found his testimony ridculous and noted so in his 62 page decision.

Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"
Witness: "I only have one, you know."


Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?"
Witness: "By death."
Lawyer: "And by whose death was it terminated?"

Q: And where was the location of the accident?
A: Approximately milepost 499.
Q: And where is milepost 499?
A: Between milepost 498 and 500.

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes
Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?


Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.

Q: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30pm
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.

haha those are great

Funny ones :1orglaugh

lol those were funny

I havent heard this one before... just awesome!!

lololololol

:) some great one here