The Worst Guitar Player In The History Of Rock...
 

Drum roll please...

Yngwie J. Malmsteen. Jimmy Hendrix is going to rape the soul of this fat Swedish idiot. Oh look! Purple Haze! It could have been worse - he could have tried to play Red House! Shit, he already tried and failed...



Sorry, that was fucking embarrasing... This idiot asshat can noodle faster than a Korean Ramen Chef, but his feel for music is, how you say, lacking. As in - Paginini is your God? Cool, stick the violin, poseur.

Yngwie is the worst guitar player in the history of rock and roll.

What follows is yet another video, from my good friend Tony Springer - Wild T. He may be old and washed up, but he can still destroy Yngwie. The man is brilliant. Its a shit recording from a shit club and he's playing with shit musicians that he barely knows. If ouy're from Toronto, Tony Springer is your God.

Too bad he was overhwelmed by cocaine and failure.



Personal anecdote below:

I'd love to post a video of FIRE live at the Roxy in Toronto. I can't, though, so maybe you can ask David Bowie about Wild T. If you that doesn't work out, you'll just have to take my word for this...

Anyway, circa 1992, my band opened for Wild T & The Spirit a number of times. We had the same management as Rik Emmet, Tony Springer, and others.

These were guys I thought I knew. Well , I knew Tony, anyway - and I remember going into their dressing room to have a drink and shoot some shit... This was in London, 1992 or 1993, and, as always - Tony had some new guys filling in. Sil Simone told me to fuck off.

I broke his nose. Good times. Mayhem breaks out. Tony is sitting in the corner, ignoring everything. He just hired these guys - he doesn't care. He's actually smiling to hmself.

Sil is curled up on the floor, crying like a baby and Jojo - Wild T's bass player - runs at me. My best man Johnny B slaps Jojo to the ground like a piece of paper, then he walks over and drops Kareem - the drummer - onto the floor. Because he could.

Half of Tony's band is crying for their mothers, and I ask - Hey, Tone. Everthing cool?

Wild T says, "Yeah. What you doing tonight?" We ended up not only opening for him, we were his backup band that nght. I've know the dude for over 30 years. He used to let me play the Strat in this video.

He's a good man, and maybe the best Canadian blues guitar player ever. Better than my late, great friend Jeff Healey, better than Colin James, and David Wilcox.

A more recent video of my good friend Tony Springer.

I appreciate the cat, but you didn't read all that.

fuck, I'm so sick of Yngwie bashing.. what the hell is so wrong with that purple haze version of his? FEELING? Give me a break. he is making faces and playing behind the tempo sometimes just like all your FEELING gods do..

I agree with you garce, it's missing something

as a guitar player I wonder about it too, like that little almost imperceptible delay in timing or rush of timing, little extra bend on not as much bend at the exact right time, there are so many variables that make a song played by a human on a guitar different than if it was programmed in note for note to a computer

but on a side note, Yngwie does have some good songs that he performs with great feel that really bring some mood out of me, but him doing purple haze is not on par with his status in the guitar world

you nailed it. Malsteem is a fast shredder, granted. But it has 0 music in him, he has 0 emotion, he has 0 creativity, just a speed freak, nothing else.

Seeing that vid I think it's a perfect example: while Hendrix had a love for visual impact, it came from music, from sheer creativity, from breaking grounds and trying to reach new horizons. When I see this Malsteem vid, he looks like an old lady whose only goal in life is conformism, settling with establishment and buying old ladie's bijoux. He's to Hendrix what Muzak is to rock :Oh crap

That explains the stupid hair.

That second guy sounds like me in my parent's basement circa 1973.

I`m assuming that was sarcasm. I HOPE that was sarcasm.

Making faces? WTF? He's prouncing around with shiny locks (shiny locks he lost 20 years ago...) and flashing his smile.

My imitation of Wingwee: Noodly-noodly-wanker-wanker-noddly-bah-HE-a-doodly-do! Boodly-oop-A7iqMWZX-kA-ca-shing-badaly-boodly! A7iqMWZX-kA = a reverse 32nd note rake. Got to give him credit for that.

Yangszte, Wangfag, Yingwoo, whatever the fat fuck calls himself - the idiot bastard is a laughing stock. He`s not a guitar player, he`s hypocritical a fiddle player. Keith Richard would walk over Yangshangwhoopie`s corpse and 50,000 people would cheer.

Yngwie is the single most pâthetic guitar player in the history of music. I`ll put my money on Django. Yngwie (or whatever the fuck) is a noodling, idiot joke.

So sayeth the garce.

The last thing on Jimi's mind when he composed Purple Haze was a fat Swedish fisherman playing the song with his teeth.

Yngwie - technically brilliant as he is - should stick to his Paganini noodling and just let Jimi and Ritchie quietly take their places in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. That is ONE PLACE where Yngwie will NEVER be welcome.

Noodle-noodle-parmesan-a taste of old Italy! Yngwie is shit. The fat asshole would not know what rock and roll was even if Elvis rose from the grave and kicked him in the face.

That`s enough. Yngwie has about as much to do with rock and roll as ABBA does. Actually, ABBA is more influential than that fat idiot.

Disagreed. I am the worst guitarist in rock...

Widdley WAHHHHH widdley widdley WAHHHHHHHHHHHH

This thread reminds me of star trek nerds arguing about dilithium crystals and warp cores and the space/time continuim thingy.

What do you think of Buckethead Garce? Similar line of thought I gues.

Hey I'm in Toronto as well, wanna go for drinks or something? You seem like an interesting guy :) I also love guitar, my dad is a big music fan and I was raised on guys like Jeff Healey, Wilcox, etc. My favourites are SRV and BB King. Even if BB wasn't "the best" that guy can make my spine tingle. Also really love great blues harmonica, Junior Wells, Little Walter, Musselwhite, etc.

I guess you remember Crowbar from Toronto? With their one album "Greatest Hits" :P

and how you know about that argument is beyond me...

I agree with you, Garce... Yngwie is lame. Comparing him to Hendrix is like comparing Lady Gaga to the Beatles. A lot of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

that yngwie is a real showman!!!!

talk about music taste of extremely old fucks, could you please stop these threads with lame, almost black and white videos of these has beens?

I do think Jeff Scott Soto (sic) was the best part of Trilogy

AzteK: what's with the constant long hair sniping??

-Loki-

I bet Robbie loves Yngwie.

Well put. :thumbsup

I must be the worst Guitarist ever!


When I was young, I had a guitar & amp for about my 11th birthday, joined a band & left the band about 2 months later (my choice to leave lol...). For the record, Im pretty good at violin & keyboard, just wasnt all that on the guitar.... :pimp

Heres to te best ever guitarist :thumbsup

You've got to give him credit for throwing the guitar 20 feet up in the air and then not even bothering to catch it. :1orglaugh

He's good at what he does, granted playing Jimi is not what he does(or atleast should do)

Who?....

Who cares? Oh wait...

What about Frank Marino?

Something about that douchebag long hair and pompous 80's attitude makes me want to repeatedly bash him in the face ... and I'm not a violent person. It's been a few decades, time to move on.