So this morning 3 big guys are knocking down my door to collect

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  • Oracle Porn
    Affiliate
    • Oct 2002
    • 24433

    #1

    So this morning 3 big guys are knocking down my door to collect

    This morning I was woken up by loud knocks almost breaking my door down, I get up from bed and see 3 big guys in leather jackets that came to collect the money

    here's what I told them.

    First, be assured that your funds are fully safe and protected. The funds are secure. The details are complicated, because there are funds in motion.

    I also told them that they are my most important asset and I'm not going to treat them anyway other than the best I can.

    Finally I added, "Rest assured that when I know something you will all be satisfied with the results. Again, your money is safe."






    They responded by breaking my nose and smashing my head on the nearest wall they could find. T
    hey will be coming around tomorrow to collect
    Last edited by Oracle Porn; 09-10-2010, 04:00 AM.


  • poisson
    Confirmed User
    • Mar 2003
    • 6474

    #2
    Funny

    Comment

    • ~Ray
      visit hardlinks.org
      • Jun 2003
      • 18361

      #3
      nothing better to do?
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      • Pics Traffic
        Confirmed User
        • Jun 2004
        • 3055

        #4
        Originally posted by Oracle Porn
        This morning I was woken up by loud knocks almost breaking my door down, I get up from bed and see 3 big guys in leather jackets that came to collect the money

        here's what I told them.

        First, be assured that your funds are fully safe and protected. The funds are secure. The details are complicated, because there are funds in motion.

        I also told them that they are my most important asset and I'm not going to treat them anyway other than the best I can.

        Finally I added, "Rest assured that when I know something you will all be satisfied with the results. Again, your money is safe."






        They responded by breaking my nose and smashing my head on the nearest wall they could find. T
        hey will be coming around tomorrow to collect

        Stop being a fucking jew. Oh wait...
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        Comment

        • tabasco
          Confirmed User
          • Jul 2006
          • 2624

          #5
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          • Jarmusch
             
            • May 2003
            • 12479

            #6
            Next time wear a military uniform and put your hands in the air while you say that.



            Maybe they'll believe you.

            Comment

            • Wiredoctor
              Confirmed User
              • Dec 2001
              • 1632

              #7
              Now that was funny....
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              • nico-t
                emperor of my world
                • Aug 2004
                • 29901

                #8

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                • 2intense
                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                  • Dec 2009
                  • 12499

                  #9
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                  • ContentPimp
                    Confirmed User
                    • Nov 2008
                    • 3184

                    #10
                    hahaha, that's a good one but thats exactly how it would be in real life...!
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                    • seeandsee
                      Check SIG!
                      • Mar 2006
                      • 50945

                      #11
                      smells fishy, probably they brake you because of that :P /where is my cash epass
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                      • HomerSimpson
                        Too lazy to set a custom title
                        • Sep 2005
                        • 13826

                        #12
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                        • woj
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                          • Jul 2002
                          • 47880

                          #13
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                          • jturn
                            Registered User
                            • Sep 2010
                            • 41

                            #14
                            Get some money and hire 3 big guys to fight back
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                            Comment

                            • spazlabz
                              Confirmed User
                              • Jul 2003
                              • 6548

                              #15
                              thank you for the levity, it gave me a chuckle

                              Comment

                              • adult-help
                                Confirmed User
                                • Mar 2008
                                • 2450

                                #16
                                You should tell them to go home and that you will wire the money to them...they just need to give you their ID copies and the copy of their latest utility bill with their name and address on it..takes 5 to 7 days..
                                Last edited by adult-help; 09-10-2010, 05:33 AM.
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                                • Oracle Porn
                                  Affiliate
                                  • Oct 2002
                                  • 24433

                                  #17
                                  they only accept cash


                                  Comment

                                  • chronig
                                    Registered User
                                    • Oct 2009
                                    • 2653

                                    #18
                                    You mean the funds being in motion wasn't an acceptable explanation?? ... weird

                                    Comment

                                    • SallyRand
                                      So Fucking Banned
                                      • Jan 2008
                                      • 3487

                                      #19
                                      Originally posted by Oracle Porn
                                      This morning I was woken up by loud knocks almost breaking my door down, I get up from bed and see 3 big guys in leather jackets that came to collect the money

                                      here's what I told them.

                                      First, be assured that your funds are fully safe and protected. The funds are secure. The details are complicated, because there are funds in motion.

                                      I also told them that they are my most important asset and I'm not going to treat them anyway other than the best I can.

                                      Finally I added, "Rest assured that when I know something you will all be satisfied with the results. Again, your money is safe."






                                      They responded by breaking my nose and smashing my head on the nearest wall they could find. T
                                      hey will be coming around tomorrow to collect
                                      Almost made me spew coffee on my keyboard!

                                      Toooooooooooooooo funny!

                                      Sally.

                                      Comment

                                      • Oracle Porn
                                        Affiliate
                                        • Oct 2002
                                        • 24433

                                        #20
                                        Originally posted by chronig
                                        You mean the funds being in motion wasn't an acceptable explanation?? ... weird
                                        They told me that the next motion these funds need to go is into their pockets otherwise I won't be able to do any kind of motion for a long while
                                        Last edited by Oracle Porn; 09-10-2010, 07:34 AM.


                                        Comment

                                        • Matyko
                                          PsyHead
                                          • Aug 2005
                                          • 8674

                                          #21
                                          At least some sense of humour in these crazyyy times..
                                          ;)
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                                          • Darkcrni
                                            Confirmed User
                                            • Jun 2007
                                            • 1704

                                            #22
                                            Nice.....lol...nice!

                                            Comment

                                            • Oracle Porn
                                              Affiliate
                                              • Oct 2002
                                              • 24433

                                              #23
                                              neccessery bump?


                                              Comment

                                              • Jack Sparrow
                                                Almost goners..
                                                • May 2008
                                                • 11420

                                                #24
                                                You owe money to a gay club?

                                                Comment

                                                • Laur1s
                                                  Registered User
                                                  • Aug 2010
                                                  • 94

                                                  #25


                                                  P.S. It should be the same with Mallick

                                                  Comment

                                                  • pOrRiDgE
                                                    Confirmed User
                                                    • Jul 2006
                                                    • 176

                                                    #26
                                                    Originally posted by Laur1s


                                                    P.S. It should be the same with Mallick
                                                    Who is that?
                                                    -<Enemy of the state>-

                                                    African virgins: Curing Jews of AIDS since 2008

                                                    Comment

                                                    • pOrRiDgE
                                                      Confirmed User
                                                      • Jul 2006
                                                      • 176

                                                      #27
                                                      Originally posted by pOrRiDgE
                                                      Who is that?
                                                      And what is he doing threatening me with bankruptcy?
                                                      -<Enemy of the state>-

                                                      African virgins: Curing Jews of AIDS since 2008

                                                      Comment

                                                      • HBKKH
                                                        Confirmed User
                                                        • Jan 2008
                                                        • 1013

                                                        #28
                                                        that's awesome
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                                                        • Tjeezers
                                                          Webmaster
                                                          • Mar 2007
                                                          • 16603

                                                          #29
                                                          that was DRY

                                                          you got a sense for humor in some sort of way

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                                                          • lazycash
                                                            Troll Patrol
                                                            • Aug 2002
                                                            • 15214

                                                            #30
                                                            Time to turn on the safety valve so they can't get to the money.
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                                                            • Kenny B!
                                                              Confirmed Abuser
                                                              • Jun 2003
                                                              • 5718

                                                              #31
                                                              You should have told them you're just the middle man
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                                                              • PornMD
                                                                Mainstream Businessman
                                                                • Jan 2007
                                                                • 9291

                                                                #32
                                                                Originally posted by Oracle Porn
                                                                This morning I was woken up by loud knocks almost breaking my door down, I get up from bed and see 3 big guys in leather jackets that came to collect the money

                                                                here's what I told them.

                                                                First, be assured that your funds are fully safe and protected. The funds are secure. The details are complicated, because there are funds in motion.

                                                                I also told them that they are my most important asset and I'm not going to treat them anyway other than the best I can.

                                                                Finally I added, "Rest assured that when I know something you will all be satisfied with the results. Again, your money is safe."






                                                                They responded by breaking my nose and smashing my head on the nearest wall they could find. T
                                                                hey will be coming around tomorrow to collect
                                                                Funny, I had the same thing happen to me, except I was smart enough to have an eager friend who tends to deal with these people greet them at the door and tell them all that while I escaped out the back. I also made sure that once they beat up my friend and got around to the back that my Filipino housekeeper was there to greet them, say they were me, and give them some more BS in poor English on my behalf.
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