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-   -   Dear God please help me (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=1027805)

garce 06-25-2011 01:33 PM

Nice cut and paste. Now, post the same story in your own words.

NetHorse 06-25-2011 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SleazyDream (Post 18237068)
It started a couple days ago. I often work late and I hear some noise

Sleep deprivation

Quote:

Originally Posted by SleazyDream (Post 18237068)
Oh well, I shrugged and headed back inside but looking up, as I often do cause I like looking at the stars, i saw what might have been a shooting star. At least at first. I was happy to see it, and it had a tail behind it too, a rare site. Until suddenly it made a right angle turn and headed up into the sky further till it disappeared. I had never seen that before and it made me think i had just seen a UFO.

makes you

Quote:

Originally Posted by SleazyDream (Post 18237068)
Actually some of this is still a little foggy in my memory, but I know I blacked out and then woke up standing up in my front yard. I'd like to say i was missing time, but I didn't check the time when I went out and when i came back in it seemed to be about right, as if I didn't miss any time or the like. Somehow I knew I had been out for a few hours or more though. Weird feeling.

hallucinate and lose track of time;

Quote:

Originally Posted by SleazyDream (Post 18237068)
I felt like a weirdo scratching my ass, and I needed to scratch it all over the hole and such. It got so bad I started to wonder if this is how it feels to be gay, so I looked at some gay porn.

it's also known turn straight-men into homosexuals.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SleazyDream (Post 18237068)
Now this might all seem weird, but tonight as I'm typing this, I know I'm not at home.

No, no, it's not weird at all. You're in another dimension, it happens all the time.

Have a drink, a big meal and a long sleep. Wake up tomorrow and plan to go somewhere with the wife, girlfriend, hooker, boyfriend, juicy, w/e for 3-4 days. You need a vacation.

When you return home, buy a glock. If after you've had time to recollect yourself and a head still pops out of your bush onto your window, blow it's fucking brains away.

If you're strapped for cash you can pickup one of these for less than a glock.

http://www.ammoland.com/wp-content/u...l-od-green.jpg

Reliable and will never jam, good for blowing away aliens in bushes.

NetHorse 06-25-2011 01:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sponsorpimp (Post 18237177)
BE WARNED - SCARY ALIEN!!!



You owe me a monitor, I just shot at it.

femdomdestiny 06-25-2011 02:06 PM

pics,or it didn't happen

NetHorse 06-25-2011 02:12 PM

http://www.demotivationalposters.org...1255300099.jpg

Cash4Me 06-25-2011 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by loreen (Post 18237160)

:thumbsup
hilarious

papill0n 06-25-2011 02:44 PM

someone has a meth habit

halfpint 06-25-2011 02:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by loreen (Post 18237160)

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh very funny


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