Super Bowl Halftime Show Marred By Functioning Sound System - The Onion - America's Finest News Source



"Super Bowl Halftime Show Marred By Functioning Sound System
SPORTS NEWS IN BRIEF
February 7, 2016
Vol 52 Issue 05 Food · Sports · Music · Nfl Football · Super Bowl 50

SANTA CLARA, CAâ??Disappointing the thousands of fans in attendance as well as an estimated 100 million viewers watching at home, the Super Bowl 50 halftime show was marred Sunday by the stadiumâ??s functioning sound system, sources confirmed. â??Right from the beginning, the sound was working normally, and unfortunately, I could clearly hear the singing,â?� said 29-year-old spectator Joe Kessler, adding that the showâ??s audio feed, which was amplified throughout the stadium and transmitted to television broadcasts with no technical issues, made the performances by Beyonce, Coldplay, and Bruno Mars completely unbearable. â??There was definitely nothing wrong with the speakers or the microphones. Itâ??s a shame, because the perfect sound quality just ruined the whole thing.â?� Kessler added that he hopes Super Bowl organizers would learn from the incident and avoid a similar disaster next year."











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They killed the football

yup :thumbsup

guess they're brainwashed because the media hypes it up like it's the 2nd coming of christ. If you get conditioned like that since birth you go along with the hype.

You would certainly never see Tom Brady back away from a fumble the way Cam did

and why is beyonce so popular? Her "music" is fucking horrible, she always manages to create complete shit that is so bad that it irritates. When i listen to the radio i can mostly just ignore the bad songs that come up, but her songs in particular are so bad and annoying that i always have to turn it off.

Nope.

It's nothing more than a fun time with friends and family indulging in food and beverages spectating a game.

No need to psychobabble it.

Bruno Mars was kinda good but it mostly sucked

Same here. Not a fan.

:thumbsup:thumbsup:thumbsup:thumbsup:thumbsup

https://scontent.cdninstagram.com/hp...01555647_n.jpg

This is the way to do a rainbow at Levi.

They should've had Lady Gaga do a halftime song set with the surviving Grateful Dead members and John Mayer filling the Jerry role. That would have been a thousand times more exciting and meaningful than what they did because of the synchronicity of the 50 year anniversaries.

Of course a band that has roots in huge LSD laced parties probably doesn't make the "family friendly" cut... but it would've been way more meaningful in terms of being in the Bay Area, and the band's historic and unique relationship to the tech pioneers that make the sound, network, and visual arts at Levi so unique.

I think Cam wasn't "avoiding" the fumble melee. It only seems that way in slo-mo. In real speed he is trying to anticipate the bounce and that one split millisecond of indecision is what makes him hesitate anticipating a bounce towards him mistakenly.

Glad the Panthers lost though. That is what they get for his stepping on a 12 flag. Also, a 43 year old who moves like he has bricks in his pants is pretty cool winning the big one on the eve of his retirement; that is always going to be good even if it isn't that interesting to watch. But, I like great defensive games. D in any sport only gets the credit they deserve when a championship is won.

hang on now...Manning is only 39, not 43 :)

You had me at John Mayer!

My bad, was watching Jaramir Jagr on the tube as I was typing and transposed the two; you are correct.

Manning still moves slower than a drunk grandma.

Yeah, his physical play wasn't very good. I think his mental mastery of the game is very good. He definitely knows how to read the field very well.

But his body couldn't quite keep up.

It's a shame really. People like you and me get a little older and we can go to the doctor and get testosterone therapy.

Athletes can't (as long as they are still playing). So they end up unable to compete with the younger guys. :(

The exact opposite of professional bodybuilding. A guy Manning's age would be in the prime of his competitive years (since they can take steroids in MASSIVE amounts).

Not saying that pro football, basketball, or baseball should have players on massive amounts of steroids.
But I do think it would be only fair if they allowed testosterone therapy.

Perhaps set a level of free testosterone in the blood that is equal to the average man at age 25.

That way a guy in his 30's (and even well into his 40's) could still play at a high physical level by keeping their testosterone levels at an optimum level.

It would be freakin' awesome to have a guy like Manning with all of his experience and knowledge of the game still be able to "go" physically as well.

Just seems kind of unfair that "normal" people can get testosterone and keep their bodies in shape and their cocks hard...but a pro athlete has to suffer without.

It would've been a better show if Lady Gaga had done the halftime thing and Bruno Mars did the National Anthem.

Maybe he thought it was still the regular season?

No way cause Lady Gaga nailed the National Anthem and Bruno would've tried to add his flair to it and I hate that shit. I gotta say I didn't think Gaga would do a good job at the anthem but she was amazing.

Watching the game while being in a restaurant in a third world country with salsa blaring from a nearby bar, I didn't care about the half time show. I just thought it was funny more than anything. However it had too much symbolism/propaganda to my liking.

Plus having no sound made me draw my own conclusions: If you like D or play D yourself, this was a great game with a lot of sack and fumble action. Go D!!! :thumbsup

That's one gross piece of disinformation.There is much more to growing old than just declining testosterone levels. And in fact, even that is not a given as in primitive rural areas old men have just as much testosterone as young men

I very much doubt that a highly trained 39yo athlete has problems with his testosterone levels. Testosterone is not the holy grail. Consistent training & recovery is. And really for a QB the most important thing is to read the field. Which he did very well as you state.:winkwink:
Kudos to him, they won! :pimp