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. . . your idea of high-quality entertainment is a six-pack and a bug-zapper.
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. . . your whole family is Democrats except little Mary. She got to readin?.
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. . . you think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are ?Gentlemen, start your engines.?
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. . . you kissed your own wife at midnight at the New Year?s Eve party.
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. . . you?ve ever taken reading material into an airplane restroom.
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. . . you?ve ever gotten an official letter of recognition from a tobacco or beer company.
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. . . you vacuum the sheets instead of washing them.
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. . . you?ve ever valet parked a snow plow.
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. . . you?ve ever stood in line to have your picture made with a freak of nature.
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. . . you break wind in public and blame it on your kid.
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. . . you?ve ever had to siphon gas from your lawn mower to put into your truck.
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I win it all again
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. . . you?ve ever paid for a six-pack of beer with pennies.
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. . . there are hubcap wind chimes anywhere on your block.
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post Bot Alert!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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. . . you have a Bud Light pool-table light hanging over your dining room table.
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. . . the strongest smell in your house is butane.
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. . . you think paprika is a Third World country.
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. . . you ask the preacher, ?How?s it hanging??
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. . . you go to a stock car race and don?t need a program.
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. . . you have a bumper sticker that says, ?My mother?s an honor student? at the local junior high.
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. . . you think potted meat on a saltine is an hors d?oeuvre.
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. . . you played the banjo in your high school band.
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. . . the velvet paintings in your house were bought from an art dealer on the side of the highway.
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. . . you have no hubcaps on your car because you?re using them to feed your hunting dogs.
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. . . you can?t visit relatives without getting mud on your tires.
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Quote:
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. . . your mother doesn?t put shoes on to go grocery shopping.
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. . . you?ve ever been blacklisted by a bowling alley.
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. . . you honest-to-God think women are turned on by animal noises and seductive tongue gestures.
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. . . anyone in your family has ever purchased peroxide in a gallon container.
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. . . you don?t think baseball players spit and scratch too much.
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. . . you?ve ever been to a wedding reception at the Waffle House.
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partayyyyyy time
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