see you when i see you - Ocean 13

"America, Fuck Yeah" from Team America

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...am_america.jpg

Carebears countdown! 5..4..3..2..1

From Good Will Hunting:

Will: "Why shouldn't I work for the N.S.A.? That's a tough one, but I'll take a shot. Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. Maybe I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never met, never had no problem with, get killed. Now the politicians are sayin', "Oh, send in the Marines to secure the area" 'cause they don't give a shit. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number got called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some kid from Southie takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes back to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile, he realizes the only reason he was over there in the first place was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And, of course, the oil companies used the skirmish over there to scare up domestic oil prices. A cute little ancillary benefit for them, but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back, of course, and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and fuckin' play slalom with the icebergs, and it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic. So now my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive, so he's got to walk to the fuckin' job interviews, which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starvin', 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat, the only blue plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State. So what did I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. I figure fuck it, while I'm at it why not just shoot my buddy, take his job, give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected president."

Stop looking at me swan!!

"If I were gay I could get laid on the subway"

just about anything from the big lebowski, or gangs of new york

clerks gets an honorable mention

37!?.....

I'm surprised with all the Scarface love, no one picked this one:

"In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women."

Not to say it's my favorite, but I think it deserves more credit than "Say hello to my little friend"

But that's just me :)

"Where are you taking us?"
"Mexico"
"Whats in Mexico?"
"Mexicans"

-- From Dusk till Dawn.

Michelle: "And this one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy!"

Jim: [Choking on his beer.] Excuse me?

Michelle: "What, you don't think I know how to get myself off? Hell, that's what half of band camp is... sex-ed! So, are we gonna screw soon? 'Cause I'm getting kinda antsy!"

Priceless! :1orglaugh Even after all these years!

Well do ya' PUNK?



And this was about the best version of this one that I could find. This scene always cracks me up.



And for you drama buffs. This scene where Malkovich goes to fuck Glenn Close has got to be one of the most bad ass displays of the power of pussy ever.




You've had your whole FUCKING LIFE to think things over. What good's a few minutes more gonna do you now?

Wendy. Darling. Light of my life. I'm not going to hurt you. You didn't let me finish my sentence. I said, I'm not gonna hurt ya' I'm just going to bash your brains in. I'm going to bash them right THE FUCK IN!"



I guess Code Red's are a no-no

"where is the stoooone?"-Snatch-Benicio Del Toro

I saw that people were posting these stupid text videos. That shit's stupid. But the movie is hilarious.

Hmmm... that would be anything from "Life of Brian"...

I think the best funny quotes where not in a movie, but in Married with Children.


This is also quite funny :

https://youtube.com/watch?v=D0hpS...eature=related

https://youtube.com/watch?v=oedeK...eature=related