GFY Advice thread... what have you learned the hard way?

[will76]

12 years ago I was bartending and finishing college, and about to start my own business that would result in making lots of money and therefore allowing me to make lots of business decisions and investments. It was my first rodeo and the first time I was making decisions with no history or experiences to help guide me through them. I made some mistakes. The first thing I learned was to not make the same mistake twice. The second thing I learned was that it was better to learn from other people's mistakes than your own.

What mistakes have you made (business related, bad investments, etc...) that you learned from that you can share with others.

I'll start it off with one of my own:

One of the most important lessons I learned (that everyone who is successful for the first time early in life should pay attention to).... every thing you touch doesn't turn to gold. Just because you excelled at one thing and made lots of money doesn't mean everything you do will be a home run. I jumped into several investments/business deals where I had little to no experience but I thought it would come easy and I could kick ass doing that as well. Most times it failed. Stick to what you do best, but if you do venture out and do something new then understand you are a noob. Seek out others who are successful at what ever the new thing is you want to do and learn from them, pay them for help and guidance if you need to.

Try to put it into prospective. How many times you see new people pop up here who think they going to make millions but they have no experience and they have no idea what they are doing. One classic example was a guy ( he posted here for a while) wanted to hire me to help him kick off his new cam site. But after a short conversation I could see how this deal was going to work out, he had been ignoring everything I was saying and telling me why I was wrong and this was going to work for him. He had made millions in some offline business that had ZERO to do with the internet much less porn. He had researched cam sites for 6 months (as if this made him an expert) and was going to prove me wrong. His site lasted about 4 months and I doubt he ever made more than a couple thousand in transactions and he spent well over 100K in just programming. Don't be that guy if you venture into something completely different than what you had been successful in. Check your ego at the door, learn as much as you can and listen to what successful people tell you. Don't jump in with your eyes closed and no parachute.


Feel free to post helpful advice about situations you went through and things you learned the hard way.

[baddog]

I should be a multi-millionaire, but the people that were running the company I invested in did not know how to delegate responsibility. Sometimes things grow beyond your abilities. It is then that you should not be afraid to hire professionals. Yes, they may be expensive, but the saying that it takes money to make money is dead on accurate.

[MetaMan]

I have learned that mistakes are not mistakes at all. Through my failures is why I am so knowledgeable now. The more you talk about actually doing something is time better spent actually doing it.

Each and every time i have "failed" i have learnt 10x more from it.

Also to keep true relationships going even if you have to suck it up and take blame once and a while. When you "work with" a group of people who realizes no one is perfect everyone ends up learning and advancing further in the long run.

The struggle and my hardships have also made me respect money 1000x more and the people with it. When i was younger i was on salary and money came much easier. Now that I have paid my dues and bridged the gap into my own business' i now know much better to save my money and invest it in my personal business rather then blow it on fly by day things.

[Angry Jew Cat - Banned for Life]

don't go acting all nigga rich at the first sign of money.

[VladS]

Focus, don't start a ton of projects at the same time if you don't have the resources to do so.

Don't try to reinvent the wheel, there's no need to and most probably, you can't. There may be rare cases where you're a genius and you do reinvent the wheel, but that's like a one in a million case.

Research, think, plan, have a strategy, treat this as any other serious offline business, be a professional.

[Kiopa_Matt]

Never mix friends and business. 98% of the time, it doesn't work. Keep your personal & business lives separate.

[Agent 488]

Smoking grass and drinking beer is like pissing into the wind.

[baddog]

Originally Posted by Kiopa_Matt

Never mix friends and business. 98% of the time, it doesn't work. Keep your personal & business lives separate.

What if you become friends after you are business partners?

[Nicky]

Originally Posted by baddog

the saying that it takes money to make money is dead on accurate.

[AsianDivaGirlsWebDude]

I was on the Program Board at my University that booked lectures and concerts for the students.

There was a good local band named Romeo Void that we booked for a free NOON show at the Student Union Amphitheater.



The Romeo Void band members asked us if the opening band playing some shows with them could also do a short set since they were a new band from Ireland trying to get some exposure.

The price was right (FREE), and so we added the Irish band on...it turned out that the name of the band was U2.

I guess you could say that was a lesson learned the easy way...

? Always be ready to collaborate

? Give good people a break

? Take calculated chances

ADG

[theking]

OP said business related or investments...and I have never made a bad business deal or investment...came close several times but pulled it out in the end.

[HerPimp]

Call it as you see it. Excuses are for losers. You either have it or you dont. Give bonus and be generous for good work. Dont wait to fire a bad apple.

[Paul Markham]

Originally Posted by Angry Jew Cat

don't go acting all nigga rich at the first sign of money.

Spot on. 2.5 years ago the shit hit our fans twice. If we had pissed all our money away we would of been in trouble.

We were careful, didn't sell our content outright, saved some money, bought our house and now can site back and relax. Except Eva hates being a housewife.

[Sarah_Jayne]

That if you don't take time to learn as you go it becomes a huge deal to catch up later.

[cjhmdm]

This one is easy...

don't

trust

anyone

in

this

biz.

[12clicks]

Older California corks don't hold up as well as their counterparts in Bordeaux.

[will76]

Originally Posted by 12clicks

Older California corks don't hold up as well as their counterparts in Bordeaux.

Thanks I will remember that nice time I am buying wine.

[signupdamnit]

1. When your gut tells you something is wrong always go with it.

2. Always try to stay ahead of everything at all times.

[Agent 488]

Originally Posted by Paul Markham

Except Eva hates being a housewife.

what's the old saying?

[Barefootsies]

I learned everything in adult, and online, the hard way. I did not have any formal training in HTML, design, or content production. I learned them all on the fly, and via feedback from members and patrons. Also reading boards, and talking to people to get tips and tricks.

Because I came up through the trenches, it has been awesome in hindsight to help stay ahead of the curve. However, it is a slow, methodical, way to learn the business. Something few have patience for.

[3xTom]

be extremely selective in making business partners

Its not IF but WHEN they will totally try to screw you over...

That is All....

Tom

[onedree]

Eleanor Roosevelt's maiden name was Roosevelt.

and

The notes in the Chimes when the 'NBC' peacock is on TV is :
Note : G
Note : E
Note : C

Which stands for General Electric Corporation

Which General Electric happens to own NBC ...

How can anyone possibly sleep at night without knowing that information ...

[BlackCrayon]

persistance does not always equal success. know when to keep going and know when to give up.

[Shap]

There is no quick money. Every time I've gotten involved in something that promised nice return with low time investment i lose money. There's no work like hard work ;)

[baddog]

Originally Posted by 12clicks

Older California corks don't hold up as well as their counterparts in Bordeaux.

Afraid you are right.

[spazlabz]

you can catch more flies with honey then you can with vinegar. Show people your good side, take time to try and understand their point of view and a lot of conflicts can be resolved amicably. Communicate, most people are more understanding if you take the time to explain things to them rather then avoiding them. Be honest even if it hurts

[bronco67]

The biggest one for me is "never let 'em see you sweat" or "cooler heads will prevail".

I worked at a company a few years back where I was the shit. I ran an animation department, and could do no wrong in the eyes of my boss.

Some kid was hired to work under me who was smooth with people, and excelled at working the system. It took him 3 years, but he used every underhanded tactic to undermine me and somehow get me behind the 8 ball with the boss.

I remember the one moment where I fucked up. It was when I finally broke down to tell the boss what was going on, and how this kid was a sack of shit that did just enough work to not get fired, etc. The sack of shit was sitting in the meeting also.

When the boss didn't see what I saw(he was a sucker), I expressed my point with such a rage and intensity for about a half hour, I must have looked like a psycho.

Sack of shit was cool headed, and acted like nothing phased him.

I was on my way out of the company I had helped build from that point on. It took about 3 months of me being a lame duck manager to realize I should get the fuck out of there and leave them with a useless turd whose only skill is creating the perception of value, where there is none.

I work for myself now, because if I'm going to work for an asshole, it's going to be me.

[BV]

Originally Posted by will76

12 years ago I was bartending and finishing college, and about to start my own business that would result in making lots of money and therefore allowing me to make lots of business decisions and investments. It was my first rodeo and the first time I was making decisions with no history or experiences to help guide me through them. I made some mistakes. The first thing I learned was to not make the same mistake twice. The second thing I learned was that it was better to learn from other people's mistakes than your own.

What mistakes have you made (business related, bad investments, etc...) that you learned from that you can share with others.

I'll start it off with one of my own:

One of the most important lessons I learned (that everyone who is successful for the first time early in life should pay attention to).... every thing you touch doesn't turn to gold. Just because you excelled at one thing and made lots of money doesn't mean everything you do will be a home run. I jumped into several investments/business deals where I had little to no experience but I thought it would come easy and I could kick ass doing that as well. Most times it failed. Stick to what you do best, but if you do venture out and do something new then understand you are a noob. Seek out others who are successful at what ever the new thing is you want to do and learn from them, pay them for help and guidance if you need to.

Try to put it into prospective. How many times you see new people pop up here who think they going to make millions but they have no experience and they have no idea what they are doing. One classic example was a guy ( he posted here for a while) wanted to hire me to help him kick off his new cam site. But after a short conversation I could see how this deal was going to work out, he had been ignoring everything I was saying and telling me why I was wrong and this was going to work for him. He had made millions in some offline business that had ZERO to do with the internet much less porn. He had researched cam sites for 6 months (as if this made him an expert) and was going to prove me wrong. His site lasted about 4 months and I doubt he ever made more than a couple thousand in transactions and he spent well over 100K in just programming. Don't be that guy if you venture into something completely different than what you had been successful in. Check your ego at the door, learn as much as you can and listen to what successful people tell you. Don't jump in with your eyes closed and no parachute.


Feel free to post helpful advice about situations you went through and things you learned the hard way.

The biggest thing I learned is that when you start a thread about giving advice and being smart you should try to use proper grammar and know the difference between "prospective" and "perspective"

[Big Ben]

Good thread.

My : Have a vision. Focus on it. Don't break the tools if you don't get results as fast as you want. Avoid self sabotage. Treat hardships as a temporary phenomena. Keep yourself positive and treat others as you want to be treated.

Peace.

[will76]

Originally Posted by BV

The biggest thing I learned is that when you start a thread about giving advice and being smart you should try to use proper grammar and know the difference between "prospective" and "perspective"

seriously? If you haven't learned by now proper grammar doesn't factor one bit into success much less giving advice. If you too busy looking at each word and if it is spelled right, used correctly, you going to miss the message.


Some of the most illiterate people on the planet post here and have made hundreds of thousands of dollars a year. I'll listen to what they have to say and keep my red pen in my pocket. English teachers really don't make much money.

[Caligari]

Originally Posted by baddog

Yes, they may be expensive, but the saying that it takes money to make money is dead on accurate.

gotta disagree with that.
many have started with nothing, invested nothing except alot of time and made money.
hell its quite possible right now to hook up with some free blog systems/free hosting from sponsors and make decent coin with little to no investment.

[$5 submissions]

Always focus on SUSTAINABILITY

[bronco67]

I wouldn't say I learned this the hard way, but it's just a philosophy that makes sense to me:

Never try to make a quick buck from a client, at the expense of a long term relationship.

[Agent 488]

Originally Posted by BV

The biggest thing I learned is that when you start a thread about giving advice and being smart you should try to use proper grammar and know the difference between "prospective" and "perspective"

exactly. if they never mastered basic life skills that you should have learned in grade six would you trust them with your business?

on a more positive note, it is never too late you get your GED.

[carzygirls]

most programmers are good at the beginning and then suck later... there are no good programmers even the ones you pay a lot.

If you find a good one, keep him/her, then icq me his/her details and keep the programmer for yourself.

All programmers on gfy are lazy, of no value to the bottom line

[digitaldivas]

i have learned that not all women are nice.

[will76]

Originally Posted by Caligari

gotta disagree with that.
many have started with nothing, invested nothing except alot of time and made money.
hell its quite possible right now to hook up with some free blog systems/free hosting from sponsors and make decent coin with little to no investment.

In most cases i would say it is true, and it is definitely a lot easier to make money if you already have lots of it.

I started this business 11 years ago with about a $2500 investment into a new computer and paying someone to build me a website. I've made lots of money with out having had a pot to piss in, but that is not the norm.

On the flip side I know of someone locally who inherited a ton of money, he purchased a lot of land several years ago in areas just out side of town. About 20 years later due to expansion that land is worth a lot of money, millions more than he paid for it.

People who have a lot of money can invest in long term deals, which will pay out a lot of money over time. People who do not have lots of money need to invest it into deals that will yield results now because they need the money to live off of. It makes it a whole lot harder to be successful if you starting off from day one broke vs someone who already has millions to play with.

[will76]

bump for more lessons learned the hard way.

[epitome]

I never saved for a rainy day and thought I was a super hero despite having a debilitating disease. It all caught up with me in 2008 following an unexpected surgery that knocked me out for awhile.

[Aussie Rebel]

Originally Posted by cjhmdm

This one is easy...

don't

trust

anyone

in

this

biz.

I agree

[glowlite]

To listen twice as much as I speak.
Still haven't mastered that but I'm much better

[WarChild]

I learned the truth; There is no spoon.

[jimmycooper]

Great thread. Here's one.
Sometimes you'll be really good at doing things that you don't necessarily want to be good at doing and sometimes you won't be good at doing things that you want to be good at doing.

[Joshua G]

i learned through the launch of JoshGirls that i did not take the proper steps to learn the skills needed to create & sell a program. I created the site due to my love for the content i created. Nobody else is doing it.

But i should have learned to be an affiliate first, learn the techniques to generate traffic & sales. Then i should have obtained customer feedback to tailor my content to what customers want to see. Then i should have built a clip store. If i found some success there, upgrade to a paysite.

I hold out hope that i can build off what i have created, but i need to invest far far far more work in marketing. My marketing program is a complete disaster.

[glowlite]

Originally Posted by joshgirls

i learned through the launch of JoshGirls that i did not take the proper steps to learn the skills needed to create & sell a program. I created the site due to my love for the content i created. Nobody else is doing it.

But i should have learned to be an affiliate first, learn the techniques to generate traffic & sales. Then i should have obtained customer feedback to tailor my content to what customers want to see. Then i should have built a clip store. If i found some success there, upgrade to a paysite.

I hold out hope that i can build off what i have created, but i need to invest far far far more work in marketing. My marketing program is a complete disaster.

That speaks volumes, seriously

[CurrentlySober]

That drinking too much, is neither big, nor clever...

Fun? Hell yeah, but not a good idea in general

[CurrentlySober]

Serious answer:

If you are going to sign ANY legal document, make sure you read it IN FULL before you sign it...

If you dont understand it 100% DONT sign it until an independent person has read it for you, and explained it fully...

Even then, STILL read what you are signing, incase anything has been changed.

[jimmycooper]

Originally Posted by will76

In most cases i would say it is true, and it is definitely a lot easier to make money if you already have lots of it.

I started this business 11 years ago with about a $2500 investment into a new computer and paying someone to build me a website. I've made lots of money with out having had a pot to piss in, but that is not the norm.

On the flip side I know of someone locally who inherited a ton of money, he purchased a lot of land several years ago in areas just out side of town. About 20 years later due to expansion that land is worth a lot of money, millions more than he paid for it.

People who have a lot of money can invest in long term deals, which will pay out a lot of money over time. People who do not have lots of money need to invest it into deals that will yield results now because they need the money to live off of. It makes it a whole lot harder to be successful if you starting off from day one broke vs someone who already has millions to play with.

Agreed.

I quit my advertising job and went through a phase where I would either be freelancing at the advertising company I had previously worked, or working full time in real estate sales. I always had a good salary in advertising, but was never able to save anything because NYC is expensive and I lived beyond my means. During the months of only doing real estate. there were times when it would be kind of tough because money would come infrequently. In big chunks, but infrequently nonetheless which made it kind of difficult. Not only from just a 'paying for essentials' standpoint, but because it required money to play the part and go after the clients I wanted.

After doing that juggling act for a while, there was finally an instance where a medium sized chunk of money came during the middle of a freelance assignment, which meant that I didn't NEED the money. At the same time, there were two back-to-back investments that sound as if they'd be high risk, but were absolute nobrainers (first buying DNDN and then shorting GM), so I pretty much went all in and it worked out. Then I shifted to a low risk strategy and am now able to either pay myself or reinvest approximately 1.5% of that money every month.

So, I guess the lesson to be learned is that sometimes the timing of opportunities will completely suck and sometimes they won't. Sometimes you can afford to take risk and sometimes you can't.

Case in point. After doing my site for a year and working really, really hard and learning a ton, there's a pretty good chance I may end up going back to do something similar to what I had done before at the end of the summer. Knowing that gives me the ability to take more risk in decisions involved with operating the site and whatnot. Etc, etc.

[twistyneck]

Originally Posted by cjhmdm

This one is easy...

don't

trust

anyone

in

this

biz.

A - Fucking - men

[DatingGameExpert]

........