I had sex in the kitchen - GoFuckYourself.com

kane · 06-05-2012, 05:56 PM

As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while. She has moved into an assisted living center. My brother is getting divorced and is going to stay with me for a while but he isn't moving in for a few more weeks. So last night the girlfriend and I are watching a movie and messing around. She suggests that since time alone in this house seems to be non-existent we should do it in the kitchen just because we can.

I have to admit, it wasn't as cool as it looks in porn. The freaking tile floor is hard and I bruised my shin, she nearly fell off the counter when I set her up on it and as I had her on the counter and was thrusting away I smacked my balls into the handle on the dishwasher.

We both ended up laughing more than anything else.

Clearly being a pornstar is a talent.

bluebook18 · 06-05-2012, 05:59 PM

you should take away your balls out in the kitchen

pornmasta · 06-05-2012, 06:01 PM

sex in the kitchen ? like in a porn movie ?
So now, ask your girlfriend to do the same thing as in this picture:

kane · 06-05-2012, 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pornmasta

sex in the kitchen ? like in a porn movie ?
So now, ask your girlfriend to do the same thing as in this picture:

that is hands on directing.

thegreatestporn · 06-05-2012, 06:17 PM

Next time make her start cooking. Then do it standing up while shes making a meal. Its a win win!

kane · 06-05-2012, 06:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thegreatestporn

Next time make her start cooking. Then do it standing up while shes making a meal. Its a win win!

Not a bad idea. . . the problem is she might be the worst cook ever. She can make mac n cheese, but that is about it.

AaronM · 06-05-2012, 09:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kane

Not a bad idea. . . the problem is she might be the worst cook ever. She can make mac n cheese, but that is about it.

Try it while she's cooking bacon.

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude · 06-05-2012, 09:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaronM

Try it while she's cooking bacon.

Sounds like you and your wifey both need to spend more time in the kitchen - her cooking, and you basting...practice makes perfect!

ADG

shake · 06-05-2012, 09:50 PM

Remind me not to eat off your counter

alias · 06-05-2012, 09:54 PM

Bro, I stay positive & so should you.

Instead of "freaking tile floor is hard and I bruised my shin, she nearly fell off the counter when I set her up on it and as I had her on the counter and was thrusting away I smacked my balls into the handle on the dishwasher"

May I suggest:

This cum slut was so demanding of all my cock that I didn't even notice how I was pulverizing my lower leg as I fucked her hard on the tile.

I was demolishing that ass so badly that I barely noticed the repeated impact of my engorged sperm sack on the appliances."

Also, pics.

CheeseFrog · 06-05-2012, 10:07 PM

Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while".

baddog · 06-05-2012, 10:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CheeseFrog

Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while".

Chosen · 06-05-2012, 10:31 PM

Pics or it didn't happen

Chosen · 06-05-2012, 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CheeseFrog

Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while".

LoL

ottopottomouse · 06-05-2012, 10:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by alias

Bro, I stay positive & so should you.

Instead of "freaking tile floor is hard and I bruised my shin, she nearly fell off the counter when I set her up on it and as I had her on the counter and was thrusting away I smacked my balls into the handle on the dishwasher"

May I suggest:

This cum slut was so demanding of all my cock that I didn't even notice how I was pulverizing my lower leg as I fucked her hard on the tile.

I was demolishing that ass so badly that I barely noticed the repeated impact of my engorged sperm sack on the appliances."

Also, pics.

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude · 06-06-2012, 02:03 AM

If you get tired of sex in the kitchen you could always read a book:

Of course, there is always sex on the beach:

Then you would probably be bitching about the sand getting in everything...

ADG

joerudy1988 · 06-06-2012, 02:09 AM

what was the camera man doing?

Lykos · 06-06-2012, 02:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AsianDivaGirlsWebDude

If you get tired of sex in the kitchen you could always read a book:

Of course, there is always sex on the beach:

Then you would probably be bitching about the sand getting in everything...

ADG

brassmonkey · 06-06-2012, 04:21 AM

you have a bedroom? turn on some music and bang out

Bill8 · 06-06-2012, 04:24 AM

bent over a table or counter is the only thing that ever really worked for me as far as kitchen sex goes.

TisMe · 06-06-2012, 04:37 AM

Please cancel my roast beef with mayo on rye.

Also, CheeseFrog makes a very good point

Verbal · 06-06-2012, 06:59 AM

Neuken in de keuken

Wizzo · 06-06-2012, 07:04 AM

I'm just glad your GF was there or this would be a much different thread...

Chosen · 06-06-2012, 07:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AsianDivaGirlsWebDude

Of course, there is always sex on the beach:

Then you would probably be bitching about the sand getting in everything...

ADG

This one is really cool

martinsc · 06-06-2012, 07:43 AM

hehe, yeah, the kitchen isn't the most comfortable place for that.... hehehe

adultchatpay · 06-06-2012, 07:49 AM

It should be served with bacon and eggs.

MarkDeus · 06-06-2012, 07:52 AM

You should leave that stuff to pros.

Worst appliance I've done it on was a drying machine. All you heard is loud noises because it moves around, and the sides are goddamn cold.

sperbonzo · 06-06-2012, 07:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CheeseFrog

Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while".

DAMN! You beat me to it! That's EXACTLY what I was thinking as I started reading... Like, whaaaaaaaaaat?

.

John-ACWM · 06-06-2012, 08:32 AM

fun times

2intense · 06-06-2012, 08:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pornmasta

sex in the kitchen ? like in a porn movie ?
So now, ask your girlfriend to do the same thing as in this picture:

kane · 06-06-2012, 11:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CheeseFrog

Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while".

LOL you have a great point.

This was a case of too much information

PAR · 06-06-2012, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kane

Clearly being a pornstar is a talent.

So was she able to make you a sandwich at the same time?

ShoeBox · 06-06-2012, 02:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kane

As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while. She has moved into an assisted living center. My brother is getting divorced and is going to stay with me for a while but he isn't moving in for a few more weeks. So last night the girlfriend and I are watching a movie and messing around. She suggests that since time alone in this house seems to be non-existent we should do it in the kitchen just because we can.

I have to admit, it wasn't as cool as it looks in porn. The freaking tile floor is hard and I bruised my shin, she nearly fell off the counter when I set her up on it and as I had her on the counter and was thrusting away I smacked my balls into the handle on the dishwasher.

We both ended up laughing more than anything else.

Clearly being a pornstar is a talent.

LOL maybe your mom should come back home

newb102k · 06-06-2012, 05:48 PM

nice share of experience!

kane · 06-06-2012, 05:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PAR

So was she able to make you a sandwich at the same time?

Sadly, I did all the work and then bought her dinner. . . . greedy woman

shimmy2 · 06-06-2012, 06:29 PM

i film girls in kitchens/bathrooms for the lighting and the audio comes out better in enclosed areas. its not practical or comfortable to do it on a hard cold dirty floor. leave it to the movies

06-05-2012, 05:56 PM	#1
kane Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: portland, OR Posts: 20,684	I had sex in the kitchen As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while. She has moved into an assisted living center. My brother is getting divorced and is going to stay with me for a while but he isn't moving in for a few more weeks. So last night the girlfriend and I are watching a movie and messing around. She suggests that since time alone in this house seems to be non-existent we should do it in the kitchen just because we can. I have to admit, it wasn't as cool as it looks in porn. The freaking tile floor is hard and I bruised my shin, she nearly fell off the counter when I set her up on it and as I had her on the counter and was thrusting away I smacked my balls into the handle on the dishwasher. We both ended up laughing more than anything else. Clearly being a pornstar is a talent.

06-05-2012, 06:17 PM	#5
thegreatestporn Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: May 2012 Location: Los Angeles, California Posts: 516	Next time make her start cooking. Then do it standing up while shes making a meal. Its a win win! __________________ CrakRevenue \| WebCamWiz - Free WebCam Whitelabel \|

06-05-2012, 09:54 PM	#10
alias aliasx Join Date: Apr 2001 Posts: 19,010	Bro, I stay positive & so should you. Instead of "freaking tile floor is hard and I bruised my shin, she nearly fell off the counter when I set her up on it and as I had her on the counter and was thrusting away I smacked my balls into the handle on the dishwasher" May I suggest: This cum slut was so demanding of all my cock that I didn't even notice how I was pulverizing my lower leg as I fucked her hard on the tile. I was demolishing that ass so badly that I barely noticed the repeated impact of my engorged sperm sack on the appliances." Also, pics. __________________ https://porncorporation.com

06-05-2012, 10:07 PM	#11
CheeseFrog Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: AZ Posts: 1,724	Dude, the next time you make a thread about having sex in the kitchen, don't start it off with "As you may or may not know my mom was living with me for a while". __________________ Cary \| AIM: cheesefrog \| ICQ: 4287002

06-06-2012, 02:03 AM	#16
AsianDivaGirlsWebDude Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: San Francisco Bay Area Posts: 38,323	If you get tired of sex in the kitchen you could always read a book: Of course, there is always sex on the beach: Then you would probably be bitching about the sand getting in everything... ADG __________________ Asian Diva Girls - Exclusive Photos and Videos Asian Diva Girls Affiliate Program (50% ccBill Revshare)

06-05-2012, 05:59 PM	#2
bluebook18 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Soon On Mars Posts: 4,082	you should take away your balls out in the kitchen

06-05-2012, 06:01 PM	#3
pornmasta Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 19,208	sex in the kitchen ? like in a porn movie ? So now, ask your girlfriend to do the same thing as in this picture:

06-05-2012, 09:50 PM	#9
shake frc Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Bitcoin wallet Posts: 4,663	Remind me not to eat off your counter

06-05-2012, 10:31 PM	#13
Chosen VIPPay.com \| AdultWebSponsors.com Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 63,151	Pics or it didn't happen

06-06-2012, 02:09 AM	#17
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06-06-2012, 04:21 AM	#19
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06-06-2012, 04:24 AM	#20
Bill8 Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2001 Posts: 1,901	bent over a table or counter is the only thing that ever really worked for me as far as kitchen sex goes.

06-06-2012, 04:37 AM	#21
TisMe Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 1,719	Please cancel my roast beef with mayo on rye. Also, CheeseFrog makes a very good point

06-06-2012, 06:59 AM	#22
Verbal Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Tampa, FL Posts: 3,420	Neuken in de keuken

06-06-2012, 07:04 AM	#23
Wizzo 2011 GFY Hall of Fame! Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Back in Texas! Posts: 15,224	I'm just glad your GF was there or this would be a much different thread... __________________ Looking for Opportunity!

06-06-2012, 07:43 AM	#25
martinsc Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: 127.0.0.1 Posts: 27,047	hehe, yeah, the kitchen isn't the most comfortable place for that.... hehehe __________________ Make Money

06-06-2012, 07:49 AM	#26
adultchatpay Let's Make Money Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 8,784	It should be served with bacon and eggs.

06-06-2012, 07:52 AM	#27
MarkDeus Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2011 Posts: 643	You should leave that stuff to pros. Worst appliance I've done it on was a drying machine. All you heard is loud noises because it moves around, and the sides are goddamn cold. __________________ marc@pornerbrosDOTcom marc@givemegayDOTcom ICQ: 631-877-938 Resistance is futile. Lower your domains and surrender your scripts. Prepare to be assimilated

06-06-2012, 08:32 AM	#29
John-ACWM Work Work Work Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: EU Posts: 20,060	fun times __________________ Video Chat Forum

06-06-2012, 05:48 PM	#34
newb102k So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2011 Posts: 667	nice share of experience!

06-06-2012, 06:29 PM	#36
shimmy2 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Dominican Republic Posts: 3,251	i film girls in kitchens/bathrooms for the lighting and the audio comes out better in enclosed areas. its not practical or comfortable to do it on a hard cold dirty floor. leave it to the movies __________________ Make $$$ with Toticos.com! \| Email: 1bluemiata@gmail \| Joutube: ShimmyCash \| Faceberg: ShimmyCash