Star Trek Beyond Crap: Why did they turn Star Trek into the Avengers? - GoFuckYourself.com

LovinNothin · 11-06-2016, 01:51 AM

Loved the 1st movie in the series. Had style, great effects, solid story, nice way to start the series.

2nd film, Please, rehashed crap, not original, horrible lifting of the "Khan" script while trying to be cute by switching the details around...wow so clever. Please. Toss in blue eyed Klingons and what happened to their 5 year mission?

3rd film, Beyond: The first half hour was great!!! As I was watching it, it felt like Star Trek. Had a few nice moments, pacing started to develop, nice action kicked in with the destruction of the ship.....loved it.... then..... uh.... WHAT THE FUCK?

After that it was nothing but explosions and gun fire every fucking 3 minutes while trying to keep your mind off the fact that they forgot to write in a story, other than, "I got his artifact and he wants it back. THAT'S THE STORY??

The action felt like it would never go away. My eyes became numb as my brain craved some kind of story to cling to.

Every other scene was outrageous as the crew of the Enterprise has turned into the Avengers. Lt. Uhura has turned into a ninja warrior, Capt Kirk turned into Evil Knievel, and they turned Spock into an emotional little girl???

What happened to Star Trek?? Where are the juicy stories, with amazing new worlds? OK, that digital bendable city was ok to look at, but we've seen it a million times in other movies, in fact you can see the exact same city in the previews of Dr. Strange. Yawn. How about something NEW??? Where are the "Strange NEW Worlds" like Kirk says in the opening credits?

Kirk and Spock get a room already. Watching them get mushy is like watching a bad gay novela. And who is the genius who made Sulu Gay??? WHAT THE FUCK??? OK, sure, toss in some gays to be politically correct, but Sulu was never gay. How about turning Uhura into a lesbian? She can dump Spock for Carol Marcus...Now that would be some political correctness we all wouldn't mind seeing.

AND CAN SOMEBODY in the make up department create a NEW evil alien???

How many times do we have to see the same dam lizard man??? Must all the aliens have human bodies and faces???? (yes, I know he's a human underneath, but come on already)

Look familiar?

That's because his cousin was in Galaxy Quest.

2MuchMark · 11-06-2016, 11:09 AM

Thank you!

I completely agree with everything you said.

The 3rd Star Trek movie in the reboot was dogshit. It was stupid beyond belief, and was all-action-zero-story. I hate saying it was "Fast and Furious in space" because it was directed by Justin Lin, but it really was "Fast and Furious in Space".

I saw the movie only once, and that was enough for me. Some of the things I hated about it were:

- Disregard for the rules of the Star Trek Universe.
- Total disregard for basic kindergarten-level physics & science.
- Complete lack of scale. The Enterprise looked like a toy. It moved like a jet plan instead of the massive ship that it is.
- Complete lack of distance. They got from the star base to the alien planet instantly like it was just next door.
- Totally STUPID resolution and method to beat the alien bad guys. I actually GROANED and FACE-PALMED at that scene, made fucking worse by over-use of the song "Sabotage" by Beastie Boys". (The song was already used before dumbasses!)
- Fucking RHIANNA singing the theme to Star Trek Beyond? WTF!
- The Enterprise had no character. In Star Trek: The Motion Picture, the Enterprise had a personality and was a thing of wonder. In Beyond, it's a disposable toy.
- The movie created zero sense of wonder for me. When I see a sci-fi movie, even if it takes place in a very familiar universe, I want to feel like I'm there.

It sucked it sucked it sucked!

I like almost all of the Star Trek movies for one reason or another. Even Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (Where they find "God", directed by William Shatner and considered the worst movie in the franchise), is better than BEYOND.

LovinNothin · 11-12-2016, 09:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by **********

Thank you!

I completely agree with everything you said.

The 3rd Star Trek movie in the reboot was dogshit. It was stupid beyond belief, and was all-action-zero-story. I hate saying it was "Fast and Furious in space" because it was directed by Justin Lin, but it really was "Fast and Furious in Space".

I saw the movie only once, and that was enough for me. Some of the things I hated about it were:

- Disregard for the rules of the Star Trek Universe.
- Total disregard for basic kindergarten-level physics & science.
- Complete lack of scale. The Enterprise looked like a toy. It moved like a jet plan instead of the massive ship that it is.
- Complete lack of distance. They got from the star base to the alien planet instantly like it was just next door.
- Totally STUPID resolution and method to beat the alien bad guys. I actually GROANED and FACE-PALMED at that scene, made fucking worse by over-use of the song "Sabotage" by Beastie Boys". (The song was already used before dumbasses!)
- Fucking RHIANNA singing the theme to Star Trek Beyond? WTF!
- The Enterprise had no character. In Star Trek: The Motion Picture, the Enterprise had a personality and was a thing of wonder. In Beyond, it's a disposable toy.
- The movie created zero sense of wonder for me. When I see a sci-fi movie, even if it takes place in a very familiar universe, I want to feel like I'm there.

It sucked it sucked it sucked!

I like almost all of the Star Trek movies for one reason or another. Even Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (Where they find "God", directed by William Shatner and considered the worst movie in the franchise), is better than BEYOND.

oh, and one last thing.... Funny how the Enterprise was a few years into their deep space mission, supposedly in space where no man has gone before... yet there was a Federation base near by for them to access?? Makes no fucking sense.

They write this shit for 12 year olds. The original TV series had more thought applied to the scripts than these new films do.

11-06-2016, 01:51 AM	#1
LovinNothin So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2015 Posts: 565	Star Trek Beyond Crap: Why did they turn Star Trek into the Avengers? Loved the 1st movie in the series. Had style, great effects, solid story, nice way to start the series. 2nd film, Please, rehashed crap, not original, horrible lifting of the "Khan" script while trying to be cute by switching the details around...wow so clever. Please. Toss in blue eyed Klingons and what happened to their 5 year mission? 3rd film, Beyond: The first half hour was great!!! As I was watching it, it felt like Star Trek. Had a few nice moments, pacing started to develop, nice action kicked in with the destruction of the ship.....loved it.... then..... uh.... WHAT THE FUCK? After that it was nothing but explosions and gun fire every fucking 3 minutes while trying to keep your mind off the fact that they forgot to write in a story, other than, "I got his artifact and he wants it back. THAT'S THE STORY?? The action felt like it would never go away. My eyes became numb as my brain craved some kind of story to cling to. Every other scene was outrageous as the crew of the Enterprise has turned into the Avengers. Lt. Uhura has turned into a ninja warrior, Capt Kirk turned into Evil Knievel, and they turned Spock into an emotional little girl??? What happened to Star Trek?? Where are the juicy stories, with amazing new worlds? OK, that digital bendable city was ok to look at, but we've seen it a million times in other movies, in fact you can see the exact same city in the previews of Dr. Strange. Yawn. How about something NEW??? Where are the "Strange NEW Worlds" like Kirk says in the opening credits? Kirk and Spock get a room already. Watching them get mushy is like watching a bad gay novela. And who is the genius who made Sulu Gay??? WHAT THE FUCK??? OK, sure, toss in some gays to be politically correct, but Sulu was never gay. How about turning Uhura into a lesbian? She can dump Spock for Carol Marcus...Now that would be some political correctness we all wouldn't mind seeing. AND CAN SOMEBODY in the make up department create a NEW evil alien??? How many times do we have to see the same dam lizard man??? Must all the aliens have human bodies and faces???? (yes, I know he's a human underneath, but come on already) Look familiar? That's because his cousin was in Galaxy Quest.

11-06-2016, 11:09 AM	#2
2MuchMark Videochat Solutions Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Canada Posts: 48,559	Thank you! I completely agree with everything you said. The 3rd Star Trek movie in the reboot was dogshit. It was stupid beyond belief, and was all-action-zero-story. I hate saying it was "Fast and Furious in space" because it was directed by Justin Lin, but it really was "Fast and Furious in Space". I saw the movie only once, and that was enough for me. Some of the things I hated about it were: - Disregard for the rules of the Star Trek Universe. - Total disregard for basic kindergarten-level physics & science. - Complete lack of scale. The Enterprise looked like a toy. It moved like a jet plan instead of the massive ship that it is. - Complete lack of distance. They got from the star base to the alien planet instantly like it was just next door. - Totally STUPID resolution and method to beat the alien bad guys. I actually GROANED and FACE-PALMED at that scene, made fucking worse by over-use of the song "Sabotage" by Beastie Boys". (The song was already used before dumbasses!) - Fucking RHIANNA singing the theme to Star Trek Beyond? WTF! - The Enterprise had no character. In Star Trek: The Motion Picture, the Enterprise had a personality and was a thing of wonder. In Beyond, it's a disposable toy. - The movie created zero sense of wonder for me. When I see a sci-fi movie, even if it takes place in a very familiar universe, I want to feel like I'm there. It sucked it sucked it sucked! I like almost all of the Star Trek movies for one reason or another. Even Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (Where they find "God", directed by William Shatner and considered the worst movie in the franchise), is better than BEYOND. __________________ VideoChat Solutions \| Custom Software \| IT Support https://www.2much.net \| https://www.lcntech.com