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Old 06-12-2004, 03:56 AM   #851
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Q. What does a blonde do with her hahahaha after sex?
A. She takes him down the pub.
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Old 06-12-2004, 03:57 AM   #852
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Q. How many blondes does it take to make a chocolate chip cookie?
A. Five. One to stir the mixture and four to peel the M&M's
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Old 06-12-2004, 03:57 AM   #853
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Q. What's the similarity between a blonde and a dog's turd?
A. The older they get, the easier they are to pick up
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Old 06-12-2004, 03:58 AM   #854
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Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a washing machine?
A. You can dump your load in a washing machine without it following you around whining for a week.
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Old 06-12-2004, 03:58 AM   #855
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Q. Why are blondes only allowed 30 minute lunch breaks?
A. It takes too long to retrain them if they take an hour.
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Old 06-12-2004, 03:59 AM   #856
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Q. What's the similarity between blondes and carpenters
A. They both have saws in their box
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:00 AM   #857
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Q. What does a blonde say after her doctor tells her that she's pregnant.
A. Is it mine?
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:00 AM   #858
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Q. Why was the blonde so pleased to complete a jigsaw puzzle in 18 months?
A. Because the box said "From 2 to 5 years"
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:01 AM   #859
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Q. How do you make a blonde laugh on a Saturday?
A. Tell her a joke on a Wednesday
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:02 AM   #860
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Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a fridge?
A. A fridge doesn't fart when you take your meat out.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:02 AM   #861
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Q. Why does a blonde drool?
A. Because she is full.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:03 AM   #862
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Q. How do you tell when a blonde is having her period?
A. She's only wearing one sock.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:04 AM   #863
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Q. What's the difference between a computer and a blonde?
A. You only have to punch information once into a computer.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:05 AM   #864
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Q. What does the label in a blondes knickers say ?
A. NEXT!
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:05 AM   #865
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Q. What's the similarity between Robert Maxwell and blondes ?
A. Both go down in Tenerife.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:06 AM   #866
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Q. Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
A. Red means stop.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:06 AM   #867
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Q. Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
A. You can park in the handicapped spots.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:08 AM   #868
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Q. Why do blondes wear so much hair spray?
A. So they can catch all the things going over their heads.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:08 AM   #869
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Q. Why do blondes wear hoop earrings?
A. So they'll have someplace to rest their ankles.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:09 AM   #870
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Q. If a blonde and a brunette jump out of an airplane at the same time, which one would hit the ground first?
A. The brunette ; the blonde would have to stop to ask directions.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:09 AM   #871
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Q. What is the difference between Bigfoot and an intelligent blonde?
A. There have actually been sightings of Bigfoot.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:10 AM   #872
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Q. What does it mean if you see a blonde with square boobs?
A. She forgot to take the Kleenex out of the box.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:10 AM   #873
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Q. Why do blondes like tilt steering wheels?
A. More head room.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:11 AM   #874
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Q. Why don't blondes like pickles?
A. They can't get their head in the jar.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:12 AM   #875
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Q. What's the first thing a blonde does in the morning?
A. Goes home.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:12 AM   #876
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Q. What's the mating call of a blonde?
A. Gosh, I'm so drunk!
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:13 AM   #877
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Q. What's the mating call of a brunette?
A. Are all the blondes gone?
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:14 AM   #878
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Q. What do blondes and computers have in common?
A. You don't know what you are missing until they go down on you.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:15 AM   #879
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Q. What is the difference between a blonde and a Cream Egg
A. It costs 20p to lick out a cream egg!
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:16 AM   #880
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Q. How is a blonde like a beer bottle?
A. They are both empty from the neck up.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:16 AM   #881
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Q. What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A. Gifted!
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:17 AM   #882
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Q. What do you call a blonde with a whole brain?
A. A Golden Retriever!
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:17 AM   #883
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Q. Why is a blonde like a turtle?
A. They both get fucked when they're on their back.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:18 AM   #884
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Q. Why do blondes wear red lipstick?
A. Because red means "Stop, wrong hole."
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:18 AM   #885
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Q. Why do blondes have TGIF on their shirts?
A. Tits Go In Front.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:19 AM   #886
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Q. What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
A. Her ankles.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:20 AM   #887
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Q. What do you say to a blonde that won't give in?
A. "Have another beer."
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:20 AM   #888
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Q. What's a blonde's favorite wine?
A "Daaaady, I want to go to Ibiza!"
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:21 AM   #889
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Q. What do you call a blonde with a pound coin on the top of her head?
A. All you can eat, under a quid.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:21 AM   #890
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Q. Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A. Because that's where you wash vegetables.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:22 AM   #891
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Q. How do you get a blonde to marry you?
A. Tell her she's pregnant.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:23 AM   #892
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Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a Porsche?
A. You don't lend the Porsche out to your friends.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:23 AM   #893
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Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a toilet?
A. A toilet won't follow you around when you've dumped in it.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:24 AM   #894
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Q. Why did the deaf blonde sit on a newspaper?
A. So she could lip read.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:25 AM   #895
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Q. How do you drown a blonde?
A. Don't tell her to swallow.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:26 AM   #896
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Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A. Catch it, pull out the pin and throw it back.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:26 AM   #897
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Q. What do you call a blonde lesbian?
A. A waste.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:27 AM   #898
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Q. Did you hear about the blonde lesbian?
A. She kept having affairs with men
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:28 AM   #899
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Q. Why did the blonde stop using the pill?
A. It kept falling out.
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Old 06-12-2004, 04:29 AM   #900
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Q. Why don't blondes use vibrators?
A. They chip their teeth.
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