Earn 40% !!! - Page 2 - GoFuckYourself.com

SteveLightspeed · 05-17-2004, 10:30 PM

50 sarcastic Lightspeeds

Monique Niccole · 05-17-2004, 10:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lightspeed
You want a check? Isn't it a pain to have to take it to your bank? Wouldn't it be better if I just sent you a wire? Of course, I don't expect you to pay the wire fees, I'll eat those too.

Maybe later I can come over and wash your car and mow your lawn?

You're right...wires are better, but if my $33.67 is a minute late, I'll run to the boards and call you a scammer...mmm'kay?

KRL · 05-17-2004, 10:46 PM

It's a bitch to be rich Steve.

That's the funny part of having success in this biz.

SteveLightspeed · 05-17-2004, 10:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Afrekete
You're right...wires are better, but if my $33.67 is a minute late, I'll run to the boards and call you a scammer...mmm'kay?

Deal! Btw, if you do add a link to your site, can you make sure you use a bunch of complete lies about the member's area content? That always converts best!

SteveLightspeed · 05-17-2004, 10:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by KRL
It's a bitch to be rich Steve.

That's the funny part of having success in this biz.

I don't know about "rich" -- I WORK for a living like everyone else...

jact · 05-17-2004, 10:49 PM

Steve, I don't think 60% is enough, can you bump our payout to 100%? I mean, we do send you traffic. Also, I think you should be picking up our hosting tab this month, we really pushed your sites hard and I wasn't happy with the above average conversion ratios.

(By above average I mean better than, not sucky)

TheDatingNetworkCameron · 05-17-2004, 10:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by jact
Steve, I don't think 60% is enough, can you bump our payout to 100%? I mean, we do send you traffic. Also, I think you should be picking up our hosting tab this month, we really pushed your sites hard and I wasn't happy with the above average conversion ratios.

(By above average I mean better than, not sucky)

Hey even after paying our hosting bill, enough was left over to buy me that M3!!

Thanks Lightspeed you guys rock!

Cameron

Dax · 05-17-2004, 11:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lightspeed
I don't know about "rich" -- I WORK for a living like everyone else...

Pffffft!

You know you guys are banking of your webmaster's traffic, otherwise you would have stopped or closed your affiliate program.

SteveLightspeed · 05-17-2004, 11:29 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dax
Pffffft!

You know you guys are banking of your webmaster's traffic, otherwise you would have stopped or closed your affiliate program.

o <- - - - - - - - - here's my point

here's you - - - - - - - - - - - > o

corvette · 05-17-2004, 11:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lightspeed
o <- - - - - - - - - here's my point

here's you - - - - - - - - - - - > o

thats gold, jerry

gold

Pornwolf · 05-18-2004, 02:01 AM

He's on a roll tonight!

Raf1 · 05-18-2004, 03:05 AM

AWW - Kevin · 05-18-2004, 03:31 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by corvett
thats gold, jerry

gold

LOL

anyway the guys at LS are doing good work, everyone needs to vent sometimes !

Jer · 05-18-2004, 06:21 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lightspeed
o <- - - - - - - - - here's my point

here's you - - - - - - - - - - - > o

What a great thread!

johnbosh · 05-18-2004, 06:36 AM

JFK · 05-18-2004, 06:58 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lightspeed
No, 40% is what I get to pay all the expenses with, since the affiliates get 60% off the top...

You need a raise !!

ArikaAmes · 05-18-2004, 07:05 AM

Funny stuff. Keep it coming Steve!

Jive · 05-18-2004, 11:05 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by SleazyDream
i'm not that much of an asshole - i'd let you use my RIDING mower to cut my grass!!!!!!!!

If http://toptrash actually stopped shavin then I couild buy my own shiney new lawnmower?

LadyMischief · 05-18-2004, 11:11 AM

Teeheee... Steve you should have me do your customer support.. I guarantee the affiliates wouldn't be up your ass

It's true though, you guys kick some big time ass... (I'd look cute in a jersey though! *wink*)

plyndrty · 05-18-2004, 11:21 AM

good thread. LMAO. You rock dude

. So true in any biz that you are in.

SteveLightspeed · 05-18-2004, 12:28 PM

By the way, for your 40%, you'll need to join the lawsuit against Acacia. If you settle, I'm gonna tear you up on the boards and recommend that everyone boycotts you.

MaDalton · 05-18-2004, 12:38 PM

so fucking right - but unfortunately too much words in a row for the most here to understand.

LadyMischief · 05-18-2004, 12:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lightspeed
By the way, for your 40%, you'll need to join the lawsuit against Acacia. If you settle, I'm gonna tear you up on the boards and recommend that everyone boycotts you.

Lol!

SteveLightspeed · 05-18-2004, 01:06 PM

To summarize

I'd like to find someone who will recruit hot new 18 year old girls that are willing to model nude, then pay her and take her pictures, then update her website regularly and host it on a super reliable, ultrafast server. Also, you'll need to buy lots of extra picture and video content so I won't lose a paying membership too soon.

I'd also like you to cover all the legal expenses, processing costs, and pay the visa registration fees.

I'd like you to provide hosted galleries, full page ads, banners, and maybe even agree to pay my hosting bill.

I'd like you to throw huge parties where I can drink myself silly, while I oggle your hot girls and generally make an ass of myself. I'm gonna need a rug to put out my cigarette on. I want you to take me to strip clubs, and I want you to buy me lapdances all night long.

I want you to do all that for no more than 40% of the net revenue that her site generates. I might even ask them to prepay me even if I can't get her site to convert. And you can pay me by check, but I tend to lose them, so you'll need to be willing to re-issue the ones I lose. But going to the bank is such a hassle, could I just have a wire instead? You'll need to eat the wire fees.

Oh yeah, and I forgot to mention that I'm going to accuse you of shaving and cheating if I can't convert any traffic at 1:500 or better. If you are a day late on my payment, I will publicly crucify you. And I'm gonna need a constant supply of new sites from you, I get tired of looking at one after a couple weeks.

And you better not take a day off, if I try to icq you and you are not there within a few minutes, I'm dropping my links! And no matter how few sales I send, I expect you to drop everything and talk to me as long as I want. I'll need lots of advice and support, you don't mind do you?

I want reward points and christmas cards are nice too. Don't forget I'll also need a non-expiring password to your sites too for "educational" purposes. When I promote your site, I want to be able to say anything to the surfer to make a sale, I don't care if its true or not, pleasing the surfer is your problem.

I'm gonna need a cool baseball jersey customized with my name and favorite number on the back...

And no matter what you do for me, I might just decide to try someone else's program for a while, cuz you are probably making too much money anyway on typeins and upsells...
And if you get someone else pushing your sites, I'm going to drop you completely, because then you'll be "over saturated".

Oh yeah, and you are gonna need lots of sites, and I want to be paid on sales to all of them from your exits. Better yet, I'll require no-console linking codes, cuz I hate popups. But don't even think about paying me less for my joins.

You'll need to join the lawsuit against Acacia, I don't care how much it costs. But if you settle, I'll tear you apart on the boards and recommend that everyone boycotts you.

And I want to lump you in with all the scammers and scumballs that have ever made money on the net. I don't care if you are honest, I have to blame someone for a bad week, and its gonna be you.

Oh yeah, and for your 40%, I want to be able to break my promises anytime, I really don't want you to be able to rely on me. I'll send you traffic when I fucking feel like it. But if you break one of YOUR promises to me, I'll drop you and move on.

Any takers?

Rick Latona · 05-18-2004, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lightspeed
To summarize

I'd like to find someone who will recruit hot new 18 year old girls that are willing to model nude, then pay her and take her pictures, then update her website regularly and host it on a super reliable, ultrafast server. Also, you'll need to buy lots of extra picture and video content so I won't lose a paying membership too soon.

I'd also like you to cover all the legal expenses, processing costs, and pay the visa registration fees.

I'd like you to provide hosted galleries, full page ads, banners, and maybe even agree to pay my hosting bill.

I'd like you to throw huge parties where I can drink myself silly, while I oggle your hot girls and generally make an ass of myself. I'm gonna need a rug to put out my cigarette on. I want you to take me to strip clubs, and I want you to buy me lapdances all night long.

I want you to do all that for no more than 40% of the net revenue that her site generates. I might even ask them to prepay me even if I can't get her site to convert. And you can pay me by check, but I tend to lose them, so you'll need to be willing to re-issue the ones I lose. But going to the bank is such a hassle, could I just have a wire instead? You'll need to eat the wire fees.

Oh yeah, and I forgot to mention that I'm going to accuse you of shaving and cheating if I can't convert any traffic at 1:500 or better. If you are a day late on my payment, I will publicly crucify you. And I'm gonna need a constant supply of new sites from you, I get tired of looking at one after a couple weeks.

And you better not take a day off, if I try to icq you and you are not there within a few minutes, I'm dropping my links! And no matter how few sales I send, I expect you to drop everything and talk to me as long as I want. I'll need lots of advice and support, you don't mind do you?

I want reward points and christmas cards are nice too. Don't forget I'll also need a non-expiring password to your sites too for "educational" purposes. When I promote your site, I want to be able to say anything to the surfer to make a sale, I don't care if its true or not, pleasing the surfer is your problem.

I'm gonna need a cool baseball jersey customized with my name and favorite number on the back...

And no matter what you do for me, I might just decide to try someone else's program for a while, cuz you are probably making too much money anyway on typeins and upsells...
And if you get someone else pushing your sites, I'm going to drop you completely, because then you'll be "over saturated".

Oh yeah, and you are gonna need lots of sites, and I want to be paid on sales to all of them from your exits. Better yet, I'll require no-console linking codes, cuz I hate popups. But don't even think about paying me less for my joins.

You'll need to join the lawsuit against Acacia, I don't care how much it costs. But if you settle, I'll tear you apart on the boards and recommend that everyone boycotts you.

And I want to lump you in with all the scammers and scumballs that have ever made money on the net. I don't care if you are honest, I have to blame someone for a bad week, and its gonna be you.

Oh yeah, and for your 40%, I want to be able to break my promises anytime, I really don't want you to be able to rely on me. I'll send you traffic when I fucking feel like it. But if you break one of YOUR promises to me, I'll drop you and move on.

Any takers?

That's a great business plan for starting a successful partner program.

Evil Chris · 05-18-2004, 01:42 PM

Steve, have you considered stand up comedy?

You'd probably make more money and you can tell the hecklers to fuck their hats.

commonsense · 05-03-2009, 08:41 AM

Excellent thread

Iron Fist · 05-03-2009, 08:45 AM

I miss seeing Steve's threads....

seeandsee · 05-03-2009, 08:46 AM

LadyMischief · 05-03-2009, 08:56 AM

Hahahhaha I'm with you Steve!

Loryn · 05-03-2009, 09:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveLightspeed

And you better not take a day off, if I try to icq you and you are not there within a few minutes, I'm dropping my links! And no matter how many sales I send, I expect you to drop everything and talk to me as long as I want.

I'll need lots of advice and support, you don't mind do you?

Nice bumpo!!!

Easton · 05-03-2009, 09:12 AM

very hilarious and too true Steve!

Jay-Rock · 05-03-2009, 11:22 AM

Damn dude sounds like you need a break.

notime · 05-03-2009, 11:32 AM

Steve making a comeback?

SBJ · 05-03-2009, 11:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jay-Rock

Damn dude sounds like you need a break.

he's taken a nice long break from this board but even now his threads get bumped

Classic thread!

Diomed · 05-03-2009, 11:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SteveLightspeed

Oh yeah, and I forgot to mention that I'm going to accuse you of shaving and cheating if I can't convert any traffic at 1:500 or better. If you are a day late on my payment, I will publicly crucify you. And I'm gonna need a constant supply of new sites from you, I get tired of looking at one after a couple weeks.

This made me smile.

05-17-2004, 10:30 PM	#51
SteveLightspeed Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Lightspeedworld Posts: 7,940	50 sarcastic Lightspeeds __________________ Abra-cadabra!

05-17-2004, 10:46 PM	#53
KRL Entrepreneur Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: USA Posts: 31,429	It's a bitch to be rich Steve. That's the funny part of having success in this biz. __________________ If you would like to develop your domains, you can lease inexpensive foreign labor from the leaders in the field at iWebmasters.com TO LOWER YOUR COSTS AND INCREASE YOUR PRODUCTION! * * * * * * * * * * * * Domains Adult News KRL's Newsletter Biz Tips Just Listed Domains

05-17-2004, 10:49 PM	#56
jact Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Oakville, Canada Posts: 9,134	Steve, I don't think 60% is enough, can you bump our payout to 100%? I mean, we do send you traffic. Also, I think you should be picking up our hosting tab this month, we really pushed your sites hard and I wasn't happy with the above average conversion ratios. (By above average I mean better than, not sucky) __________________ Free agent

05-18-2004, 02:01 AM	#61
Pornwolf Drunk and Unruly Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Hollywood Posts: 22,712	He's on a roll tonight! __________________ I've trusted my sites to them for over a decade... Webair, bitches.

05-18-2004, 03:05 AM	#62
Raf1 Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Writer for hire :) Gallery descriptions, articles, blog posts etc. ICQ: 209 356 106 Posts: 12,117	__________________ 80% Revshare or 30$ PPS on $1 trials: 200 Niches = Vidz.com Galleries / FLVs / Embeds 3 & 5mins FLVs \| RSS & Tube Feeds \| Matching Thumbs \| FLV Browser & Exporter \| No Prechecked Xsales >> Mobile Redirection Script: mobile.vidz.com also paying 80% net Lifetime << ICQ: 198-394-557

05-18-2004, 06:36 AM	#65
johnbosh Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: The Netherlands, Rotterdam Posts: 8,965	:D

05-18-2004, 07:05 AM	#67
ArikaAmes Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 3,081	Funny stuff. Keep it coming Steve!

05-18-2004, 11:11 AM	#69
LadyMischief Orgasms N Such! Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Oakville, Ontario Posts: 18,135	Teeheee... Steve you should have me do your customer support.. I guarantee the affiliates wouldn't be up your ass It's true though, you guys kick some big time ass... (I'd look cute in a jersey though! wink) __________________ ICQ 3522039 Content Manager - orgasm.com [email protected]

05-18-2004, 11:21 AM	#70
plyndrty Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Tampa Posts: 1,477	good thread. LMAO. You rock dude . So true in any biz that you are in.

05-18-2004, 12:28 PM	#71
SteveLightspeed Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Lightspeedworld Posts: 7,940	By the way, for your 40%, you'll need to join the lawsuit against Acacia. If you settle, I'm gonna tear you up on the boards and recommend that everyone boycotts you. __________________ Abra-cadabra!

05-18-2004, 12:38 PM	#72
MaDalton I am Amazing Content! Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 39,822	so fucking right - but unfortunately too much words in a row for the most here to understand. __________________ AmazingContent.com - providing only the best content and service since 2003 Monetize your content on Veegaz.com - one of Germanies largest VOD sites Got German traffic? We convert it into money for you! Skype: madalton02826 - Email: oltecconsult [at] gmail [dot] com

05-18-2004, 01:06 PM	#74
SteveLightspeed Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Lightspeedworld Posts: 7,940	To summarize I'd like to find someone who will recruit hot new 18 year old girls that are willing to model nude, then pay her and take her pictures, then update her website regularly and host it on a super reliable, ultrafast server. Also, you'll need to buy lots of extra picture and video content so I won't lose a paying membership too soon. I'd also like you to cover all the legal expenses, processing costs, and pay the visa registration fees. I'd like you to provide hosted galleries, full page ads, banners, and maybe even agree to pay my hosting bill. I'd like you to throw huge parties where I can drink myself silly, while I oggle your hot girls and generally make an ass of myself. I'm gonna need a rug to put out my cigarette on. I want you to take me to strip clubs, and I want you to buy me lapdances all night long. I want you to do all that for no more than 40% of the net revenue that her site generates. I might even ask them to prepay me even if I can't get her site to convert. And you can pay me by check, but I tend to lose them, so you'll need to be willing to re-issue the ones I lose. But going to the bank is such a hassle, could I just have a wire instead? You'll need to eat the wire fees. Oh yeah, and I forgot to mention that I'm going to accuse you of shaving and cheating if I can't convert any traffic at 1:500 or better. If you are a day late on my payment, I will publicly crucify you. And I'm gonna need a constant supply of new sites from you, I get tired of looking at one after a couple weeks. And you better not take a day off, if I try to icq you and you are not there within a few minutes, I'm dropping my links! And no matter how few sales I send, I expect you to drop everything and talk to me as long as I want. I'll need lots of advice and support, you don't mind do you? I want reward points and christmas cards are nice too. Don't forget I'll also need a non-expiring password to your sites too for "educational" purposes. When I promote your site, I want to be able to say anything to the surfer to make a sale, I don't care if its true or not, pleasing the surfer is your problem. I'm gonna need a cool baseball jersey customized with my name and favorite number on the back... And no matter what you do for me, I might just decide to try someone else's program for a while, cuz you are probably making too much money anyway on typeins and upsells... And if you get someone else pushing your sites, I'm going to drop you completely, because then you'll be "over saturated". Oh yeah, and you are gonna need lots of sites, and I want to be paid on sales to all of them from your exits. Better yet, I'll require no-console linking codes, cuz I hate popups. But don't even think about paying me less for my joins. You'll need to join the lawsuit against Acacia, I don't care how much it costs. But if you settle, I'll tear you apart on the boards and recommend that everyone boycotts you. And I want to lump you in with all the scammers and scumballs that have ever made money on the net. I don't care if you are honest, I have to blame someone for a bad week, and its gonna be you. Oh yeah, and for your 40%, I want to be able to break my promises anytime, I really don't want you to be able to rely on me. I'll send you traffic when I fucking feel like it. But if you break one of YOUR promises to me, I'll drop you and move on. Any takers? __________________ Abra-cadabra!

05-18-2004, 01:42 PM	#76
Evil Chris OG Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: 3rd from the Sun Posts: 13,231	Steve, have you considered stand up comedy? You'd probably make more money and you can tell the hecklers to fuck their hats. __________________ It PAYZE to post on GFY chris at payze.com \| Skype chriswrp

05-03-2009, 08:41 AM	#77
commonsense So Fucking Banned Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,790	Excellent thread

05-03-2009, 08:45 AM	#78
Iron Fist Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 23,400	I miss seeing Steve's threads.... __________________ i like waffles

05-03-2009, 08:46 AM	#79
seeandsee Check SIG! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Europe (Skype: gojkoas) Posts: 50,945	__________________ BUY MY SIG - 50$/Year Contact here

05-03-2009, 08:56 AM	#80
LadyMischief Orgasms N Such! Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Oakville, Ontario Posts: 18,135	Hahahhaha I'm with you Steve! __________________ ICQ 3522039 Content Manager - orgasm.com [email protected]

05-03-2009, 09:12 AM	#82
Easton Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Phoenix, AZ Posts: 9,825	very hilarious and too true Steve! __________________ New models booked and shot every week... MILFs, pornstars and teens. Girls for every niche and project. Looking for high-quality affordable exclusive content? Check me out at Easton Content for all the details.

05-03-2009, 11:22 AM	#83
Jay-Rock Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Porn Valley Posts: 2,779	Damn dude sounds like you need a break. __________________ HD and 4k Content Production by JayRock http://jayspov.net http://blackforwife.com http://cospimps.com SKYPE JAYROCKCONTENT [email protected] Twitter @jayrockcontent

05-03-2009, 11:32 AM	#84
notime Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: cyberspace Posts: 8,020	Steve making a comeback?