Good "Yo Mama" jokes - GoFuckYourself.com

tbsteve · 05-03-2005, 04:49 PM

Ok, who has a good "yo mama" joke, and a good one, not those lame ones, and something new, dont bring that old shit.

here's one to start off;

you mama is so fat, her picture fell off the wall.

Harmon · 05-03-2005, 04:51 PM

Yo Mama So Ugly:

she put the Boogie man outta business.

she make Michael Jackson look like Brad Pitt

when she wobbles down the street in September, folk say, "Damn it, can't believe it's Halloween already..."

when she applied for the ugly contest they told her 'NO Professionals'

she looked out her window and was arrested for indecent exposure!

minutes after she was born her Mother shouted 'What a treasure!" and her Poppa said "Yes, now let's go and bury her..."

they push her face into the dough mixture when making Monster cookies.

when they took her to the Beautician it took 10 hours....and that was just for the quote!

yer Daddy takes her to work each day so he doesny have to kiss her goodbye...

she put Marilyn Manson out of business.

she was a guard at Snake Mountain

they knew what time she was born cuz her face stopped the clock...

even Harry Knowles refused to date her.

they embalmed her face on a box of super-strength laxatives and sold it empty!

she gets 364 extra days just to dress up for Halloween.

Tony Blair moved Halloween to her birthday.

you papa throws the ugly stick and she goes fetches it every time.

she scared the stitching outta Frankenstein.

we had to tie a steak round her neck so the dogs would play with her.

I heard yer Father first met her at the Zoo.

her shadow gave up.

people at the Zoo pay cash so they DON't have to see her...

her mom had to be Pissed drunk just to breast feed her.

when born, the doctors had to fit her incubator with tinted windows.

hotel managers use her picture to keep away the Rats.

instead of round the ankles, they put the Bungee Jumping cord round her neck.

they gave her a middle name...'accident'.

she fell out of the Ugly Tree, hitting every branch on the way down.

when she walked into the Haunted House, she came back out with a Job Application!

even Slicky Willy Clinton refused to sleep with her...

when she was born the Doc smacked her face.

Your Mama So Fat
when she step on the Weight Scales it says...'to be continued'...

she once went on a seafood diet...whenever she saw food she ate it!

folk exercise by jogging around her!

when she bends over, we enter Daylight Saving Time.

she sat on a Nintendo Gamecube and it turned into a gameboy

she make Kiko the Whale look like a Smartie

NASA plan to use her to shore up the hole in the Ozone layer

she was measured at 38-26-36 and that was just the left arm...

small objects orbit her.

she make olympic sumo wrestlers look anerixic.

when I tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.

when she farted she launched herself into orbit.

she lost a game at Hide&Seek only cos I spotted her...behind Mount Everest.

when I had to swerve to avoid hitting her on the road I ran out of Petrol!

she could be the eighth continent.

she nearly put Safeway out of business

the only thing that's attracted to her is gravity.

her Uni graduation photo was an aerial

when she auditioned for a part in Raiders of the Lost Ark she got the part of the big Rolling Ball.

she make Jabba the Hutt look anorexic.

her fave food is seconds.

her belt size is Equator.

she eats Desert out of a Trash Can lid

she wears an 'X' jacket and Copters attempt to land on her

she shows up on radar.

she needs a map to find her butt.

she fell into the Grand Canyon....and got stuck!

she wears an asteroid belt.

her Passport photo says 'Picture is continued overleaf'

she has TB ... 2 bellys.

she's once, twice, three times a lady.

she was in the Daily Record last week on page 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9.

the circus use her as a trampoline

stunt agencies use her as an air mattress

when she opens the Fridge it says - 'I give up...'

she got a new gig at the Cinema...she works as the screen

she once told me 'I could eat a horse'...believe me, she wasn't kidding!

she deep fries her toothpaste.

bringer · 05-03-2005, 04:53 PM

everytime i hear one i think of in living color

nofx · 05-03-2005, 04:54 PM

yo mommas so fat she has other fat moms orbiting around her

woj · 05-03-2005, 04:57 PM

"when she applied for the ugly contest they told her 'NO Professionals'"

Rilose · 05-03-2005, 05:11 PM

Yo Mama So Fat, her belt size is equator!

tbsteve · 05-04-2005, 04:29 PM

ok ok harmon you win!!!!! didnt think anyone knew that many.

sweetME · 05-04-2005, 04:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nofx

yo mommas so fat she has other fat moms orbiting around her

Loryn · 05-04-2005, 05:04 PM

her mom had to be Pissed drunk just to breast feed her.

Donny · 05-04-2005, 06:17 PM

You're momma is so fat, she can put on a red suit and run through a brick wall yellin' "Cool Aid"

You're momma is so fat, when she says she's just sittin' around the house, she's seriously sitting AROUND THE HOUSE

You're momma is so fat, she has to get outta the car to switch gears

nico-t · 05-04-2005, 07:05 PM

your momma is a fucking crackhead and i double raped her bony ass with two baseball bats and destroyed her uterus when ramming a rusty wrench up her dry snatch

was that a good one? i dont know

05-03-2005, 04:49 PM	#1
tbsteve Registered User Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: AZ Posts: 83	Good "Yo Mama" jokes Ok, who has a good "yo mama" joke, and a good one, not those lame ones, and something new, dont bring that old shit. here's one to start off; you mama is so fat, her picture fell off the wall.

05-03-2005, 04:51 PM	#2
Harmon ( ͡ʘ╭͜ʖ╮͡ʘ) Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 20,010	Yo Mama So Ugly: she put the Boogie man outta business. she make Michael Jackson look like Brad Pitt when she wobbles down the street in September, folk say, "Damn it, can't believe it's Halloween already..." when she applied for the ugly contest they told her 'NO Professionals' she looked out her window and was arrested for indecent exposure! minutes after she was born her Mother shouted 'What a treasure!" and her Poppa said "Yes, now let's go and bury her..." they push her face into the dough mixture when making Monster cookies. when they took her to the Beautician it took 10 hours....and that was just for the quote! yer Daddy takes her to work each day so he doesny have to kiss her goodbye... she put Marilyn Manson out of business. she was a guard at Snake Mountain they knew what time she was born cuz her face stopped the clock... even Harry Knowles refused to date her. they embalmed her face on a box of super-strength laxatives and sold it empty! she gets 364 extra days just to dress up for Halloween. Tony Blair moved Halloween to her birthday. you papa throws the ugly stick and she goes fetches it every time. she scared the stitching outta Frankenstein. we had to tie a steak round her neck so the dogs would play with her. I heard yer Father first met her at the Zoo. her shadow gave up. people at the Zoo pay cash so they DON't have to see her... her mom had to be Pissed drunk just to breast feed her. when born, the doctors had to fit her incubator with tinted windows. hotel managers use her picture to keep away the Rats. instead of round the ankles, they put the Bungee Jumping cord round her neck. they gave her a middle name...'accident'. she fell out of the Ugly Tree, hitting every branch on the way down. when she walked into the Haunted House, she came back out with a Job Application! even Slicky Willy Clinton refused to sleep with her... when she was born the Doc smacked her face. Your Mama So Fat when she step on the Weight Scales it says...'to be continued'... she once went on a seafood diet...whenever she saw food she ate it! folk exercise by jogging around her! when she bends over, we enter Daylight Saving Time. she sat on a Nintendo Gamecube and it turned into a gameboy she make Kiko the Whale look like a Smartie NASA plan to use her to shore up the hole in the Ozone layer she was measured at 38-26-36 and that was just the left arm... small objects orbit her. she make olympic sumo wrestlers look anerixic. when I tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips. when she farted she launched herself into orbit. she lost a game at Hide&Seek only cos I spotted her...behind Mount Everest. when I had to swerve to avoid hitting her on the road I ran out of Petrol! she could be the eighth continent. she nearly put Safeway out of business the only thing that's attracted to her is gravity. her Uni graduation photo was an aerial when she auditioned for a part in Raiders of the Lost Ark she got the part of the big Rolling Ball. she make Jabba the Hutt look anorexic. her fave food is seconds. her belt size is Equator. she eats Desert out of a Trash Can lid she wears an 'X' jacket and Copters attempt to land on her she shows up on radar. she needs a map to find her butt. she fell into the Grand Canyon....and got stuck! she wears an asteroid belt. her Passport photo says 'Picture is continued overleaf' she has TB ... 2 bellys. she's once, twice, three times a lady. she was in the Daily Record last week on page 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9. the circus use her as a trampoline stunt agencies use her as an air mattress when she opens the Fridge it says - 'I give up...' she got a new gig at the Cinema...she works as the screen she once told me 'I could eat a horse'...believe me, she wasn't kidding! she deep fries her toothpaste. __________________ [email protected]

05-03-2005, 04:53 PM	#3
bringer i have man boobies Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: van down by the river Posts: 13,082	everytime i hear one i think of in living color __________________ 333-765-551

05-03-2005, 04:54 PM	#4
nofx Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Virgin Mary's womb Posts: 16,826	yo mommas so fat she has other fat moms orbiting around her __________________ Often times I wonder why There's love and hate, theres live or die. When sickness comes I must decide: When feelings go, theres suicide.

05-03-2005, 04:57 PM	#5
woj <&(©¿©)&> Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Chicago Posts: 47,882	"when she applied for the ugly contest they told her 'NO Professionals'" __________________ Custom Software Development, email: woj#at#wojfun#.#com to discuss details or skype: wojl2000 or gchat: wojfun or telegram: wojl2000 Affiliate program tools: Hosted Galleries Manager Banner Manager Video Manager Wordpress Affiliate Plugin Pic/Movie of the Day Fansign Generator Zip Manager

05-03-2005, 05:11 PM	#6
Rilose Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: USA Posts: 565	Yo Mama So Fat, her belt size is equator! __________________ GFX/WEB/PRINT r i l o s e @ h o t m a i l . d o t c o m

05-04-2005, 04:29 PM	#7
tbsteve Registered User Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: AZ Posts: 83	ok ok harmon you win!!!!! didnt think anyone knew that many.

05-04-2005, 05:04 PM	#9
Loryn Super Connector Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 12,853	her mom had to be Pissed drunk just to breast feed her. __________________ ~ loryn@loryntaylor . com ~ RIP TD

05-04-2005, 06:17 PM	#10
Donny As you wish... Industry Role: Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 13,754	You're momma is so fat, she can put on a red suit and run through a brick wall yellin' "Cool Aid" You're momma is so fat, when she says she's just sittin' around the house, she's seriously sitting AROUND THE HOUSE You're momma is so fat, she has to get outta the car to switch gears

05-04-2005, 07:05 PM	#11
nico-t emperor of my world Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: nethalands Posts: 29,903	your momma is a fucking crackhead and i double raped her bony ass with two baseball bats and destroyed her uterus when ramming a rusty wrench up her dry snatch was that a good one? i dont know