Joke of the day: - GoFuckYourself.com

DVTimes · 06-03-2005, 05:21 AM

Joke of the day: A little boy walks into his parents' room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. The mom sees her son and quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has seen. She dresses quickly and goes to find him. The son sees his mom and asks, "What were you and Dad doing?" The mother replies "Well you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it to help flatten it." "You're wasting your time," said the boy. "Why is that?" asked his mom, puzzled. "Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on her knees and blows it right back up."

sonofsam · 06-03-2005, 05:22 AM

lol, thanks for the early mornin' laugh

Manowar · 06-03-2005, 05:23 AM

wildgirl · 06-03-2005, 05:29 AM

lol

adonthenet · 06-03-2005, 05:29 AM

thanks ! haha good one

Pete-KT · 06-03-2005, 05:29 AM

Oldie but funny everytime i read it

GMX · 06-03-2005, 05:42 AM

good one,

gecko · 06-03-2005, 05:44 AM

heh good one

Miss Vlasta · 06-03-2005, 05:54 AM

Have one as well:

Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation. "How'd you die?" the first man asks the second.
"I froze to death," says the second.
"That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?"
"It's very uncomfortable at first", says the second man. "You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How about you, how did you die?"
"I had a heart attack," says the first man. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I ran down to the basement, but no one was hiding there, either. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died." The second man shakes his head. "That's so ironic," he says.
"What do you mean?" asks the first man.
"If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive."

Terry · 06-03-2005, 05:57 AM

2 laughs for the price of one.. thanks!

FilthyRob · 06-03-2005, 06:19 AM

heard it, but still a good laugh

chadglni · 06-03-2005, 06:19 AM

Vitasoy · 06-03-2005, 06:24 AM

heh that one is not bad at all

Dalai lama · 06-03-2005, 06:26 AM

Not bad

Mefo · 06-03-2005, 07:13 AM

lol classic joke

sevent1 · 06-03-2005, 07:28 AM

lol cool

axelcat · 06-03-2005, 07:41 AM

xXxtreme2005 · 06-03-2005, 07:42 AM

good laugh

jimmyf · 06-03-2005, 07:55 AM

Two ninety year old men, Moe and Sam, have been friends all their lives. It
seems that Sam is dying of cancer, and Moe comes to visit him every day.

"Sam," says Moe, "You know how we have both loved baseball all our lives,
and how we played minor league ball together for so many years.

Sam, you have to do me one favor. When you get to Heaven, and I know you
will go to Heaven, somehow you've got to let me know if there's baseball in
Heaven."

Sam looks up at Moe from his death bed, and says, "Moe, you've been my
best friend many years. This favor, if it is at all possible, I'll do for
you."

And shortly after that, Sam passes on.

It is midnight a couple of nights later. Moe is sound asleep when he is
awakened by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calls out to him,
"Moe..... Moe...."

"Who is it?" says Moe sitting up suddenly. "Who is it?"

"Moe, it's me, Sam."

"Come on. You're not Sam. Sam just died."

"I'm telling you," insists the voice. "It's me, Sam!"

"Sam? Is that you? Where are you?"

"I'm in heaven," says Sam, "and I've got to tell you, I've got really good
news and a little bad news."

"So, tell me the good news first," says Moe.

"The good news," says Sam "is that there is baseball in heaven. Better
yet, all our old buddies who've gone before us are there. Better yet, we're
all young men again. Better yet, it's always spring time and it never rains
or snows. And best of all, we can play baseball all we want, and we never
get tired!"

"Really?" says Moe, "That is fantastic, wonderful beyond my wildest
dreams! But, what's the bad news?"

"You're pitching next Tuesday"

LittleSassy · 06-03-2005, 08:03 AM

thanks for the laugh!...

sickkittens · 06-03-2005, 08:18 AM

That was funny....back in 1992.

taibo · 06-03-2005, 09:03 AM

lol nice one

06-03-2005, 05:21 AM	#1
DVTimes xxx Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: UK Posts: 31,544	Joke of the day: Joke of the day: A little boy walks into his parents' room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. The mom sees her son and quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has seen. She dresses quickly and goes to find him. The son sees his mom and asks, "What were you and Dad doing?" The mother replies "Well you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it to help flatten it." "You're wasting your time," said the boy. "Why is that?" asked his mom, puzzled. "Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on her knees and blows it right back up." __________________ The Affiliate Program

06-03-2005, 05:22 AM	#2
sonofsam Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Vancouver Posts: 18,638	lol, thanks for the early mornin' laugh __________________ I like turtles.

06-03-2005, 05:29 AM	#4
wildgirl My Sig was too Big! :( Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 2,554	lol __________________ My Best Money Maker:

06-03-2005, 05:44 AM	#8
gecko ****** Join Date: Jun 2002 Posts: 21,846	heh good one __________________ [email protected]

06-03-2005, 05:54 AM	#9
Miss Vlasta Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 1,005	Have one as well: Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation. "How'd you die?" the first man asks the second. "I froze to death," says the second. "That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?" "It's very uncomfortable at first", says the second man. "You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How about you, how did you die?" "I had a heart attack," says the first man. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I ran down to the basement, but no one was hiding there, either. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died." The second man shakes his head. "That's so ironic," he says. "What do you mean?" asks the first man. "If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive." __________________ PrivateCuties.com - Affiliates wanted... Amateur teen paysite, 50% revshare, CCBILL free hosted galleries, 10% webmaster referrals. Czech-Models.info - Content store... You can have these models on your site!

06-03-2005, 05:23 AM	#3
Manowar jellyfish Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 71,528

06-03-2005, 05:29 AM	#5
adonthenet Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 16,753	thanks ! haha good one

06-03-2005, 05:29 AM	#6
Pete-KT Workin With The Devil Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: West Bloomfield, MI Posts: 51,532	Oldie but funny everytime i read it

06-03-2005, 05:42 AM	#7
GMX Registered User Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: AT Posts: 54	good one,

06-03-2005, 05:57 AM	#10
Terry Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Montreal Posts: 1,604	2 laughs for the price of one.. thanks! __________________ TengaCash ICQ: 6776764

06-03-2005, 06:19 AM	#11
FilthyRob Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Anaheim - CA Posts: 6,741	heard it, but still a good laugh __________________ AKA - Clubsexy

06-03-2005, 06:19 AM	#12
chadglni Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: PEI, Canada Posts: 6,924	__________________ Sign up here - Dating Site affiliate program

06-03-2005, 06:24 AM	#13
Vitasoy GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 58,202	heh that one is not bad at all __________________ [email protected]

06-03-2005, 06:26 AM	#14
Dalai lama Strength and Honor Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Europe Posts: 16,540	Not bad __________________ A program you can trust. Gallerybooster Run multiply TGPs of 1 script

06-03-2005, 07:13 AM	#15
Mefo Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Amsterdam Posts: 6,169	lol classic joke __________________

06-03-2005, 07:28 AM	#16
sevent1 Registered User Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 80	lol cool __________________ X

06-03-2005, 07:41 AM	#17
axelcat Adult Locals Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: West Coast Posts: 25,450

06-03-2005, 07:42 AM	#18
xXxtreme2005 Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: st louis/IL metro area Posts: 717	good laugh __________________ GOT TRAFFIC?.......I BUY TRAFFIC ICQ 318-368-640

06-03-2005, 07:55 AM	#19
jimmyf OU812 Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: California Posts: 12,651	Two ninety year old men, Moe and Sam, have been friends all their lives. It seems that Sam is dying of cancer, and Moe comes to visit him every day. "Sam," says Moe, "You know how we have both loved baseball all our lives, and how we played minor league ball together for so many years. Sam, you have to do me one favor. When you get to Heaven, and I know you will go to Heaven, somehow you've got to let me know if there's baseball in Heaven." Sam looks up at Moe from his death bed, and says, "Moe, you've been my best friend many years. This favor, if it is at all possible, I'll do for you." And shortly after that, Sam passes on. It is midnight a couple of nights later. Moe is sound asleep when he is awakened by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calls out to him, "Moe..... Moe...." "Who is it?" says Moe sitting up suddenly. "Who is it?" "Moe, it's me, Sam." "Come on. You're not Sam. Sam just died." "I'm telling you," insists the voice. "It's me, Sam!" "Sam? Is that you? Where are you?" "I'm in heaven," says Sam, "and I've got to tell you, I've got really good news and a little bad news." "So, tell me the good news first," says Moe. "The good news," says Sam "is that there is baseball in heaven. Better yet, all our old buddies who've gone before us are there. Better yet, we're all young men again. Better yet, it's always spring time and it never rains or snows. And best of all, we can play baseball all we want, and we never get tired!" "Really?" says Moe, "That is fantastic, wonderful beyond my wildest dreams! But, what's the bad news?" "You're pitching next Tuesday" __________________ Epic CashEpic Cash works for me Solar Cash Paysite Plugin Gallery of the day freesites,POTD,Gallery generator with free hosting

06-03-2005, 08:03 AM	#20
LittleSassy Confirmed User Join Date: May 2005 Location: behind you Posts: 7,402	thanks for the laugh!... __________________ Proadultoutsourcing.com ~ version 2.0 OFFSHORE SOLUTIONS PROVIDER SINCE 2003 ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE 264-580-554

06-03-2005, 08:18 AM	#21
sickkittens I am a meat popsicle. Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 25,100	That was funny....back in 1992. __________________ HIGHEST PAYOUTS FOR NO-CONSOLE TOURS IN THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY! THIS SIG CAN BE YOURS FOR $200 - ICQ: 78881543

06-03-2005, 09:03 AM	#22
taibo Confirmed User Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 3,720	lol nice one