Gorgeous Russian Girls - GoFuckYourself.com

Haydos · 01-29-2006, 11:10 PM

Dear Russian girl posers:

I?m not sure exactly how successful your little racket is, sending out carefully crafted emails in broken English to guys with personal ads at various sites. But let me give you some advice to improve your business model and marketing techniques, and maybe you can send me a commission percentage if my suggestions work out for you.

1) If you imitate bad grammar, remember the rule ?a little goes a long way?. Hacking up each sentence in an attempt to sound ?Russian? it can be quite obvious that you are doing it on purpose. You might as well phonetically spell out a fake accent. It also really helps to mispell a couple of words too. It raises the credibility. This doesn?t work so well: ?Hello. My name Svetlana. I looked profiles and have seen yours profile, I liked yours profile and I would think that to me very much would be desirable to get acquainted better.?

2) The story of being an orphan is a bit of stretch and it has been way overused. Maybe have a more detailed and interesting story of being the sexy daughter of a factory worker who drinks too much vodka. I like the story of your aunt getting you that job as a secretary in an office building and having a sweet black cat named Masha. Very sweet. And including the photo of the cat was a nice touch. Other overused phrases are ?I with impatience wait for your letter? and ?I will look to the future I want real love with you?.

3) Keep the email address of your potential victims/customers better organized. If you send one email message under the name ?Ludmilla? and then send the identical message again under the name ?Mariya? soon after, even the most desperate and vulnerable guys will most likely make the connection. It?s possible that some will just think you have a nickname, but there will be fewer of us.

4) I understand you probably have hundreds or even thousands of emails to send out, but if you included a reason why you think that we would be a good match and ?be in loving and construct a family? forever and ever, it would go a long way to making that personal connection that really helps loosen up the money you will ask to be wired via Western Union later on.

5) If you mention getting married immediately after telling us your fake Russian name and the bleak Siberian town you live in, that is a red flag to almost every American guy regardless of their level of desperation. Even the most crazy desperate of guys have a built-in electrochemical alarm in our brains that makes us think there must be something wrong with someone that wants to marry their bleary-eyed, pasty faced, out-of-shape, too-much-tv/video game/pizza, lonely ass. At least before they get to know us and have a chance to bond.

6) When a potential victim/customer sends an email back, it might be a good idea to actually read it. There might be important information in there. Such as ?I?ve inherited several million dollars, and I would like to have a Russian mistress to pamper and spoil as long as I can visit whenever I want.? Or, ?I really liked that photo of you in that red lingerie standing out in the snow, but I am gay. And, honey, red is not your color.?

7) After gaining the mark?s confidence and getting his poor desperate soul?s hopes up that he might have a chance at having sex with a semi-attractive girl, even if he has to wire money to Zabrosk for the medical treatment that you need but can?t afford, it is important to follow up with some kind of reward. Maybe a photo of you kissing another pretty girl would be nice.

I?m sure I can give many more pointers for your scam, er, business. . . I mean opportunity for love and happiness in America. But we will take it slow for now until we get a chance to know each other better.

billywatson · 01-29-2006, 11:27 PM

You're kidding here, right?

fr0gman · 01-29-2006, 11:44 PM

Pouring onto your fingers too much time I see.

Haydos · 01-31-2006, 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fr0gman

Pouring onto your fingers too much time I see.

equivalent not to the time they spend ripping off the male species

just a punk · 01-31-2006, 04:04 PM

Who's there?

Lev · 01-31-2006, 04:06 PM

russkiye soski pizdec krasiviye

Michaelious · 01-31-2006, 04:28 PM

lol like it lol

Haydos · 01-31-2006, 04:32 PM

i cannot find anything 'free' to translate that...

Fresh · 01-31-2006, 04:34 PM

yot vayoomat

Lev · 01-31-2006, 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dave Guru

yot vayoomat

yob tvoyu mat, but close enough

just a punk · 01-31-2006, 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lev

russkiye soski pizdec krasiviye

uge v 100 raz kruche zhirnyh i vonuchih amerikanskih blyadey

So... let's get off on real Russian chicks (see below)

Haydos · 01-31-2006, 04:42 PM

K sozhaleniyu, ya poka ne govoryu po russki.

Govorite li vy po angliyski?

just a punk · 01-31-2006, 04:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Haydos

K sozhaleniyu, ya poka ne govoryu po russki.

Govorite li vy po angliyski?

po kakovski? nea... u nas na derevne po-russki to nikto chtat' ne umeet

Haydos · 01-31-2006, 05:10 PM

thread killer !!!!

just a punk · 01-31-2006, 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Haydos

thread killer !!!!

nope. we're thread reanimators

The Sultan Of Smut · 01-31-2006, 06:35 PM

mayon · 01-31-2006, 09:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Sultan Of Smut

i almost fell of my chair with this

KRL · 01-31-2006, 10:35 PM

Many Russian girls are actually fucking gorgeous though.

Vitasoy · 01-31-2006, 10:47 PM

Not what I was expecting.. but no doubt Russia girls are pretty hawt in general

Haydos · 01-31-2006, 11:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Sultan Of Smut

damn, i am going to cut off my left hand...

SmutGiant · 02-01-2006, 12:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KRL

Many Russian girls are actually fucking gorgeous though.

I couldn't agree more!

just a punk · 02-01-2006, 03:50 AM

and that's true

01-29-2006, 11:10 PM	#1
Haydos Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Down Under Posts: 308	Gorgeous Russian Girls Dear Russian girl posers: I?m not sure exactly how successful your little racket is, sending out carefully crafted emails in broken English to guys with personal ads at various sites. But let me give you some advice to improve your business model and marketing techniques, and maybe you can send me a commission percentage if my suggestions work out for you. 1) If you imitate bad grammar, remember the rule ?a little goes a long way?. Hacking up each sentence in an attempt to sound ?Russian? it can be quite obvious that you are doing it on purpose. You might as well phonetically spell out a fake accent. It also really helps to mispell a couple of words too. It raises the credibility. This doesn?t work so well: ?Hello. My name Svetlana. I looked profiles and have seen yours profile, I liked yours profile and I would think that to me very much would be desirable to get acquainted better.? 2) The story of being an orphan is a bit of stretch and it has been way overused. Maybe have a more detailed and interesting story of being the sexy daughter of a factory worker who drinks too much vodka. I like the story of your aunt getting you that job as a secretary in an office building and having a sweet black cat named Masha. Very sweet. And including the photo of the cat was a nice touch. Other overused phrases are ?I with impatience wait for your letter? and ?I will look to the future I want real love with you?. 3) Keep the email address of your potential victims/customers better organized. If you send one email message under the name ?Ludmilla? and then send the identical message again under the name ?Mariya? soon after, even the most desperate and vulnerable guys will most likely make the connection. It?s possible that some will just think you have a nickname, but there will be fewer of us. 4) I understand you probably have hundreds or even thousands of emails to send out, but if you included a reason why you think that we would be a good match and ?be in loving and construct a family? forever and ever, it would go a long way to making that personal connection that really helps loosen up the money you will ask to be wired via Western Union later on. 5) If you mention getting married immediately after telling us your fake Russian name and the bleak Siberian town you live in, that is a red flag to almost every American guy regardless of their level of desperation. Even the most crazy desperate of guys have a built-in electrochemical alarm in our brains that makes us think there must be something wrong with someone that wants to marry their bleary-eyed, pasty faced, out-of-shape, too-much-tv/video game/pizza, lonely ass. At least before they get to know us and have a chance to bond. 6) When a potential victim/customer sends an email back, it might be a good idea to actually read it. There might be important information in there. Such as ?I?ve inherited several million dollars, and I would like to have a Russian mistress to pamper and spoil as long as I can visit whenever I want.? Or, ?I really liked that photo of you in that red lingerie standing out in the snow, but I am gay. And, honey, red is not your color.? 7) After gaining the mark?s confidence and getting his poor desperate soul?s hopes up that he might have a chance at having sex with a semi-attractive girl, even if he has to wire money to Zabrosk for the medical treatment that you need but can?t afford, it is important to follow up with some kind of reward. Maybe a photo of you kissing another pretty girl would be nice. I?m sure I can give many more pointers for your scam, er, business. . . I mean opportunity for love and happiness in America. But we will take it slow for now until we get a chance to know each other better. __________________

01-29-2006, 11:27 PM	#2
billywatson Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: The Valley o' Smut. Posts: 3,281	You're kidding here, right? __________________ We're Fabulous! PROTECT YOUR CONTENT on Twitter I Shoot Porn.

01-29-2006, 11:44 PM	#3
fr0gman Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 2,093	Pouring onto your fingers too much time I see. __________________ Earn up to $.03 per Visitor -> No Click Monetization! "Because the World Wide Web is all about two things: horrifyingly stupid psychodrama, and naked chicks." Wild College Videos \| ICQ: 7746696

01-31-2006, 04:04 PM	#5
just a punk So fuckin' bored Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 32,386	Who's there? __________________ Obey the Cowgod

01-31-2006, 04:28 PM	#7
Michaelious Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Scotland Posts: 6,720	lol like it lol __________________

01-31-2006, 04:06 PM	#6
Lev Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2001 Posts: 3,545	russkiye soski pizdec krasiviye

01-31-2006, 04:32 PM	#8
Haydos Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Down Under Posts: 308	i cannot find anything 'free' to translate that... __________________

01-31-2006, 04:34 PM	#9
Fresh TubeClicks.com - First Tube Affiliate Program Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: LA Posts: 4,920	yot vayoomat __________________ Promote ONE Legal Tube Site, Collect Checks from 19 Sponsors Fresh Dave \| Email: [email protected] \| ICQ: 317160390

01-31-2006, 04:42 PM	#12
Haydos Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Down Under Posts: 308	K sozhaleniyu, ya poka ne govoryu po russki. Govorite li vy po angliyski? __________________

01-31-2006, 05:10 PM	#14
Haydos Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Down Under Posts: 308	thread killer !!!! __________________

01-31-2006, 06:35 PM	#16
The Sultan Of Smut Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Vancouver Posts: 4,325

01-31-2006, 10:35 PM	#18
KRL Entrepreneur Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: USA Posts: 31,429	Many Russian girls are actually fucking gorgeous though. __________________ If you would like to develop your domains, you can lease inexpensive foreign labor from the leaders in the field at iWebmasters.com TO LOWER YOUR COSTS AND INCREASE YOUR PRODUCTION! * * * * * * * * * * * * Domains Adult News KRL's Newsletter Biz Tips Just Listed Domains

01-31-2006, 10:47 PM	#19
Vitasoy GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 58,202	Not what I was expecting.. but no doubt Russia girls are pretty hawt in general __________________ [email protected]

02-01-2006, 03:50 AM	#22
just a punk So fuckin' bored Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 32,386	and that's true __________________ Obey the Cowgod