Married means MARRIED, you Moron! - GoFuckYourself.com

Donny · 08-24-2006, 04:23 PM

Found this on Craig's List:

It's getting to the point where I can't even read those stupid personal ads anymore, not even for fun.

They're loaded with married people, bitching about their spouses, and looking for something "better".

I've got a few things to tell you:

1. "She" is not the reason your marriage sucks. YOU are. If you spent half as much time paying attention to her as you do trolling CL for sluts, your marriage would be a whole hell of a lot better.

2. Yeah, yeah, we've all heard it a thousand times. You're in a sexless marriage. First of all, that's probably a lie, because most cheaters are liars too. I'm gonna let you in on a little secret, pal- if your wife isn't interested in sex, it's because you're not offering sex that's interesting. Married guys get awfully boring after a while. They do the same boring thing the same boring way every fucking time and they expect you to scream like a porn star. Seriously, you come home from work, totally ignore her while she chases the kids around for 4 hours, makes dinner, does the laundry, blah blah blah, and then you expect her to roll over with her legs open for another session of same-old same-old? When are you idiots going to learn that the best foreplay in the world for a woman is watching you take care of the kids, vacuum the floor, pick up the dog poo in the backyard. Or how about just listening when she talks? You know, it's not that fucking hard to stop thinking about yourself for five minutes and hear what she has to say. Think about it- way back when, when you were getting your brains fucked out on a regular basis- what were YOU doing differently than you're doing now? Planning dates, telling her she looked nice, acting like you're happy to be with her? A thousand dollars says if you do that stuff again you'll get the same result.

3. Your kids are NOT the reason you're staying married. If you were THAT miserable, you'd leave whether you had kids or not. If you're not getting a divorce it's because YOU DON'T WANT TO. For whatever reason. At least be honest and don't try to feed people that tired bullshit line about staying married for the kids. Contrary to what you think, it doesn't make you look like a poor suffering but honorable victim. You obviously don't care enough about your kids to treat their mother with enough respect not to cheat on her, and you don't care about them enough to spend time with THEM instead of some cheap whore, so cut it out with that crap. There is absolutely nothing honorable about putting your dick ahead of your kids. If you really really cared about them, you would put ALL your time and effort and money into saving the one thing that means most to them in the whole world- your marriage and their family. Otherwise you're full of shit.

4. We all know how bored you are. Poor you, someone should really come along to entertain you. What are you, fucking 12 years old? If you're bored with your marriage, it's because YOU'RE BORING, and have you ever stopped to think that if you're bored, she probably is too. But instead of throwing a temper tantrum like a 2 year old, she's at home cleaning out the lint trap on the dryer and washing kool-aid off the kitchen floor. Yeah, she's having a fucking riot washing your underwear and cleaning up cat puke. Marriage is hard work. Hell, life is hard work. Grow the fuck up and take some responsibility for yourself. You have a brain, USE it. Put some thought into your marriage and some effort into your life and stop blaming her and being a baby because life isn't fun.

5. You're looking for someone "younger". Sure you are. Dickhead. You think you look the same as you did when you got married? I'd bet not. Even if you do, you haven't spent the last 10 years having babies (the ones YOU wanted) and sacrificing your body for them. The next time you have to have someone stitch your asshole together because your just pushed a watermelon out of your butt, then you can sqwauk. If you ever spend 9 months with your belly stretched to obscene proportions, and manage to look exactly the same as you used to 6 weeks later, then you can bitch about how she's not attractive anymore. Until then, shut the fuck up. You have no concept of what she has sacrificed to give you the children you claim to love. You really think she wants varicose veins and stretch marks and saggy boobs? Get real. What she wants is a man who understands and values WHY she has varicose veins and stretch marks and saggy boobs. She wants a man who loves her because she was willing to make those sacrifices with her own body because she loves HIM. Instead, you criticize and go running off with the first perky 25 year old who gives you the time of day. Asshole.

6. And finally, if you're cheating on your wife, there's something wrong with YOU. If you're not happy with your marriage, exactly how do you think fucking some slut is going to fix that? Exactly how is that going to make anyone happy? Have you ever actually heard of adultery working out really well for everyone involved? Are you actually stupid enough to think that you're going to be the exception to that rule? If so, you are delusional and you need professional help. Affairs are disasters- not some of the time, not most of the time, ALL OF THE TIME. You guilt will drive you crazy. Someone WILL find out. You will NOT be able to keep up the lies and the deception. And it will all lead up to a disaster of epic proportions, which leads me to Lucky #7.

7. Here's what you can expect in the wake of your little fuck-fest:

Divorce- this is where you lose everything- your wife, your house, half your income and possessions, possibly your job if you're stupid enough to be fucking around with a co-worker, your kids- EVERYTHING. You will LOSE IT ALL.

Exposure- this is where everyone finds out what a scumbag you are. And they WILL find out. Your boss, your co-workers, your friends, your family, HER family, your neighbors, the parents of your kids' friends, everyone at your church. They WILL find out. Why? Because your now ex-wife will tell them. She will probably tell everyone she knows, and everyone you know, and she will feel good doing it. Consider yourself lucky if she doesn't rent a billboard. Otherwise, all bets are off. Be prepared.

Your Kids- this is where you totally lose the respect of your kids, and you deserve to lose it. They will realize in pretty short order that you didn't care enough about them to keep your fucking pants on. They will see their mother cry and they will hate you for it. They will end up shuttling back and forth between their home and your apartment, and they will hate you for it. Every time they have to tell someone that their parents are divorced, they will hate you for it. And God forbid you decide to "introduce" them to your shiny new soulmate/fuckbuddy, they will REALLY hate you for that. If your kids are really young, you have a little time before all this shit hits the fan, but be warned, it's coming. They will forever see you as the moron who broke up their family. They will know that you can't be trusted, that you are weak and immoral and selfish. And they'll figure it out all by themselves, even if you never talk to them about it. Because your kids are smarter than you are at this point.

So, go ahead and whine your pathetic bullshit about how you're a victim and your wife is a horrible shrew. Do your best to convince yourself that you didn't have any choice and your wife "drove you to it." Start with the rationalizations and justifications now, you're going to need a lot of them. Remember that the best defense is a good offense and start a mental list of all the ways your wife is deficient. Make sure to re-write the history of your marriage so that you can say that you were miserable from the first day. Be sure to tell your wife that you love her, you're just not "in love" with her anymore. Deal with your guilt by lashing out at everyone around you. Above all, take no responsibility for any problems YOU may have that caused you to be such a spineless bastard in the first place.

Congratulations, you've just joined the Adulterers Club. See you in hell.

AaronM · 08-24-2006, 04:25 PM

I just wanna cuddle with Donny.

ne0 · 08-24-2006, 04:26 PM

You're right.
If you cant make one happy why having two

Bro Media - BANNED FOR LIFE · 08-24-2006, 04:26 PM

cliff notes?

Belinda · 08-24-2006, 04:26 PM

damn that is a long read

Ice · 08-24-2006, 04:26 PM

Feel the love

blazi · 08-24-2006, 04:27 PM

marriage is so 19th century!!

wdsguy · 08-24-2006, 04:27 PM

*takes down my craigslist post*

Libertine · 08-24-2006, 04:27 PM

In other words: hell hath no whining like a woman dumped.

AaronM · 08-24-2006, 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Belinda

damn that is a long read

I read through number 1 then decided that the rest was probably pretty much the same. Either way.....All I care about is my quality cuddle time with Donny.

Donny · 08-24-2006, 04:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LOL :D

cliff notes?

That would defeat the purpose. Took me two minutes to read it all. It's not that hard for those of us who are literate.

AaronM · 08-24-2006, 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Donny

That would defeat the purpose. Took me two mintues to read it all. It's not that hard for those of us who are literate.

But what about those of us who are not?

Donny · 08-24-2006, 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaronM

I read through number 1 then decided that the rest was probably pretty much the same. Either way.....All I care about is my quality cuddle time with Donny.

I'm not into cuddling. I just like fucking.

AaronM · 08-24-2006, 04:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Donny

I'm not into cuddling. I just like fucking.

No deal. I'll fuck you too but only if I can have some cuddle time before AND afterwards.

Donny · 08-24-2006, 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaronM

No deal. I'll fuck you too but only if I can have some cuddle time before AND afterwards.

Belinda's got me spoiled. There was a time I liked foreplay, but she just wanted to fuck and then go to sleep so now I'm a new man. No more foreplay for me.

Belinda · 08-24-2006, 04:37 PM

You can cuddle him when you get here.

AaronM · 08-24-2006, 04:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Belinda

You can cuddle him when you get here.

OUTSTANDING!

I'll see you tomorrow night.

crazies · 08-24-2006, 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Belinda

You can cuddle him when you get here.

Hey guys I am feeling a little lonely here........

Scott McD · 08-24-2006, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Donny

Congratulations, you've just joined the Adulterers Club. See you in hell.

Cheers !!

AaronM · 08-24-2006, 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazies

Hey guys I am feeling a little lonely here........

OK....You can have Donny and I will cuddle with Belinda instead. I am willing to make this sacrifice for you and only you.

You owe me one now.

BoyAlley · 08-24-2006, 04:48 PM

omg that's pretty funny

crazies · 08-24-2006, 04:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaronM

OK....You can have Donny and I will cuddle with Belinda instead. I am willing to make this sacrifice for you and only you.

You owe me one now.

Ouch and I just proposed to Belinda

Belinda · 08-24-2006, 04:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaronM

OUTSTANDING!

I'll see you tomorrow night.

For real tomorrow? need to know so i can clean LOL

AaronM · 08-24-2006, 04:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazies

Ouch and I just proposed to Belinda

How many times have you done that now?

AaronM · 08-24-2006, 04:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Belinda

For real tomorrow? need to know so i can clean LOL

Yep. I'm leaving LA tomorrow morning or mid day.

E$_manager · 08-24-2006, 04:53 PM

Donny, you are so right posting it that i feel a relative soul in you and wonder are you really a man?

AaronM · 08-24-2006, 04:53 PM

I've got Sophia with me...She can do the cleaning for you. ;)

crazies · 08-24-2006, 04:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaronM

How many times have you done that now?

OMG people read this board now I am screwed....

ok ok you can snuggle with Belinda and I will snuggle with Donny

BTW I am trying to be one of the chosen few on your list so paleeaseeee authorize me

crazies · 08-24-2006, 04:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaronM

Yep. I'm leaving LA tomorrow morning or mid day.

uh huh ok I see how it is, you clean for Aaron but hand me the vaccuum when I walk through the door

AaronM · 08-24-2006, 04:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazies

OMG people read this board now I am screwed....

ok ok you can snuggle with Belinda and I will snuggle with Donny

BTW I am trying to be one of the chosen few on your list so paleeaseeee authorize me

I'm about to go out to the pool for a swim. When I turn ICQ on next, I will authorize you.

Belinda · 08-24-2006, 04:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazies

uh huh ok I see how it is, you clean for Aaron but hand me the vaccuum when I walk through the door

Nah i just need to change the bed stuff, not really clean. I made sure your bedding was clean to so :P

crazies · 08-24-2006, 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AaronM

I'm about to go out to the pool for a swim. When I turn ICQ on next, I will authorize you.

awesome

have fun in the pool and take picssssssss

crazies · 08-24-2006, 05:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Belinda

Nah i just need to change the bed stuff, not really clean. I made sure your bedding was clean to so :P

ummmm yeahhh you did

cyberstar · 08-24-2006, 05:22 PM

great read... i bet the person who wrote that is not married :P

pink_in_the_middle · 08-24-2006, 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Donny

Found this on Craig's List:

It's getting to the point where I can't even read those stupid personal ads anymore, not even for fun.

They're loaded with married people, bitching about their spouses, and looking for something "better".

I've got a few things to tell you:

1. "She" is not the reason your marriage sucks. YOU are. If you spent half as much time paying attention to her as you do trolling CL for sluts, your marriage would be a whole hell of a lot better.

2. Yeah, yeah, we've all heard it a thousand times. You're in a sexless marriage. First of all, that's probably a lie, because most cheaters are liars too. I'm gonna let you in on a little secret, pal- if your wife isn't interested in sex, it's because you're not offering sex that's interesting. Married guys get awfully boring after a while. They do the same boring thing the same boring way every fucking time and they expect you to scream like a porn star. Seriously, you come home from work, totally ignore her while she chases the kids around for 4 hours, makes dinner, does the laundry, blah blah blah, and then you expect her to roll over with her legs open for another session of same-old same-old? When are you idiots going to learn that the best foreplay in the world for a woman is watching you take care of the kids, vacuum the floor, pick up the dog poo in the backyard. Or how about just listening when she talks? You know, it's not that fucking hard to stop thinking about yourself for five minutes and hear what she has to say. Think about it- way back when, when you were getting your brains fucked out on a regular basis- what were YOU doing differently than you're doing now? Planning dates, telling her she looked nice, acting like you're happy to be with her? A thousand dollars says if you do that stuff again you'll get the same result.

3. Your kids are NOT the reason you're staying married. If you were THAT miserable, you'd leave whether you had kids or not. If you're not getting a divorce it's because YOU DON'T WANT TO. For whatever reason. At least be honest and don't try to feed people that tired bullshit line about staying married for the kids. Contrary to what you think, it doesn't make you look like a poor suffering but honorable victim. You obviously don't care enough about your kids to treat their mother with enough respect not to cheat on her, and you don't care about them enough to spend time with THEM instead of some cheap whore, so cut it out with that crap. There is absolutely nothing honorable about putting your dick ahead of your kids. If you really really cared about them, you would put ALL your time and effort and money into saving the one thing that means most to them in the whole world- your marriage and their family. Otherwise you're full of shit.

4. We all know how bored you are. Poor you, someone should really come along to entertain you. What are you, fucking 12 years old? If you're bored with your marriage, it's because YOU'RE BORING, and have you ever stopped to think that if you're bored, she probably is too. But instead of throwing a temper tantrum like a 2 year old, she's at home cleaning out the lint trap on the dryer and washing kool-aid off the kitchen floor. Yeah, she's having a fucking riot washing your underwear and cleaning up cat puke. Marriage is hard work. Hell, life is hard work. Grow the fuck up and take some responsibility for yourself. You have a brain, USE it. Put some thought into your marriage and some effort into your life and stop blaming her and being a baby because life isn't fun.

5. You're looking for someone "younger". Sure you are. Dickhead. You think you look the same as you did when you got married? I'd bet not. Even if you do, you haven't spent the last 10 years having babies (the ones YOU wanted) and sacrificing your body for them. The next time you have to have someone stitch your asshole together because your just pushed a watermelon out of your butt, then you can sqwauk. If you ever spend 9 months with your belly stretched to obscene proportions, and manage to look exactly the same as you used to 6 weeks later, then you can bitch about how she's not attractive anymore. Until then, shut the fuck up. You have no concept of what she has sacrificed to give you the children you claim to love. You really think she wants varicose veins and stretch marks and saggy boobs? Get real. What she wants is a man who understands and values WHY she has varicose veins and stretch marks and saggy boobs. She wants a man who loves her because she was willing to make those sacrifices with her own body because she loves HIM. Instead, you criticize and go running off with the first perky 25 year old who gives you the time of day. Asshole.

6. And finally, if you're cheating on your wife, there's something wrong with YOU. If you're not happy with your marriage, exactly how do you think fucking some slut is going to fix that? Exactly how is that going to make anyone happy? Have you ever actually heard of adultery working out really well for everyone involved? Are you actually stupid enough to think that you're going to be the exception to that rule? If so, you are delusional and you need professional help. Affairs are disasters- not some of the time, not most of the time, ALL OF THE TIME. You guilt will drive you crazy. Someone WILL find out. You will NOT be able to keep up the lies and the deception. And it will all lead up to a disaster of epic proportions, which leads me to Lucky #7.

7. Here's what you can expect in the wake of your little fuck-fest:

Divorce- this is where you lose everything- your wife, your house, half your income and possessions, possibly your job if you're stupid enough to be fucking around with a co-worker, your kids- EVERYTHING. You will LOSE IT ALL.

Exposure- this is where everyone finds out what a scumbag you are. And they WILL find out. Your boss, your co-workers, your friends, your family, HER family, your neighbors, the parents of your kids' friends, everyone at your church. They WILL find out. Why? Because your now ex-wife will tell them. She will probably tell everyone she knows, and everyone you know, and she will feel good doing it. Consider yourself lucky if she doesn't rent a billboard. Otherwise, all bets are off. Be prepared.

Your Kids- this is where you totally lose the respect of your kids, and you deserve to lose it. They will realize in pretty short order that you didn't care enough about them to keep your fucking pants on. They will see their mother cry and they will hate you for it. They will end up shuttling back and forth between their home and your apartment, and they will hate you for it. Every time they have to tell someone that their parents are divorced, they will hate you for it. And God forbid you decide to "introduce" them to your shiny new soulmate/fuckbuddy, they will REALLY hate you for that. If your kids are really young, you have a little time before all this shit hits the fan, but be warned, it's coming. They will forever see you as the moron who broke up their family. They will know that you can't be trusted, that you are weak and immoral and selfish. And they'll figure it out all by themselves, even if you never talk to them about it. Because your kids are smarter than you are at this point.

So, go ahead and whine your pathetic bullshit about how you're a victim and your wife is a horrible shrew. Do your best to convince yourself that you didn't have any choice and your wife "drove you to it." Start with the rationalizations and justifications now, you're going to need a lot of them. Remember that the best defense is a good offense and start a mental list of all the ways your wife is deficient. Make sure to re-write the history of your marriage so that you can say that you were miserable from the first day. Be sure to tell your wife that you love her, you're just not "in love" with her anymore. Deal with your guilt by lashing out at everyone around you. Above all, take no responsibility for any problems YOU may have that caused you to be such a spineless bastard in the first place.

Congratulations, you've just joined the Adulterers Club. See you in hell.

Good advice

Pinky

Bama · 08-24-2006, 06:37 PM

Sounds like somebody has massive anger for blowing countless numbers of married guys and buying the "i'll leave her for you, but just not yet......uhhhhh you *are* going to swallow that right?" line

rodney25 · 08-24-2006, 07:35 PM

Thank goodness, I'm still single.

Bro Media - BANNED FOR LIFE · 08-24-2006, 07:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Donny

That would defeat the purpose. Took me two minutes to read it all. It's not that hard for those of us who are literate.

i'm literate, i just really don't care to read a bunch of verbal diarrhea about what you think about people on craigs list

Jace · 08-24-2006, 07:42 PM

isn't it annoying when people quote really long posts and just type a two word reply at the end?

anyway, excellent shit donny...I am sending that to everyone I know...LOL...mostly the cheater assholes

Jace · 08-24-2006, 07:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LOL :D

i'm literate, i just really don't care to read a bunch of verbal diarrhea about what you think about people on craigs list

apparently you are illiterate, he cleary states in his first line that he "found this on craigslist"

tony286 · 08-24-2006, 07:44 PM

man having a bad day lol

JD · 08-24-2006, 07:46 PM

this thread needs more jellyfish

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude · 08-24-2006, 07:48 PM

ADG Webmaster

E$_manager · 08-24-2006, 07:50 PM

That was really a good reading. I am gonna safe it.

BlackCrayon · 08-24-2006, 07:53 PM

um, im pretty damn sure i read that you cheated on your ex-wife donny.

Drake · 08-24-2006, 07:57 PM

If my spouse doesn't cheat like everybody else does, I'm going to feel cheated.

BlackCrayon · 08-24-2006, 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlackCrayon

um, im pretty damn sure i read that you cheated on your ex-wife donny.

ack, didn't read that you found this on craiglist. nevermind.

GatorB · 08-24-2006, 08:12 PM

Women cheat too. I know this for a fact.

minusonebit · 08-24-2006, 08:26 PM

Damn, someone needs to put thier bible away.

iwantchixx · 08-24-2006, 08:42 PM

thats fuckign retarted..

Sometimes the wifey really is the problem..

It's called being female and not always getting their way anymore.

08-24-2006, 04:23 PM	#1
Donny As you wish... Industry Role: Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 13,754	Married means MARRIED, you Moron! Found this on Craig's List: It's getting to the point where I can't even read those stupid personal ads anymore, not even for fun. They're loaded with married people, bitching about their spouses, and looking for something "better". I've got a few things to tell you: 1. "She" is not the reason your marriage sucks. YOU are. If you spent half as much time paying attention to her as you do trolling CL for sluts, your marriage would be a whole hell of a lot better. 2. Yeah, yeah, we've all heard it a thousand times. You're in a sexless marriage. First of all, that's probably a lie, because most cheaters are liars too. I'm gonna let you in on a little secret, pal- if your wife isn't interested in sex, it's because you're not offering sex that's interesting. Married guys get awfully boring after a while. They do the same boring thing the same boring way every fucking time and they expect you to scream like a porn star. Seriously, you come home from work, totally ignore her while she chases the kids around for 4 hours, makes dinner, does the laundry, blah blah blah, and then you expect her to roll over with her legs open for another session of same-old same-old? When are you idiots going to learn that the best foreplay in the world for a woman is watching you take care of the kids, vacuum the floor, pick up the dog poo in the backyard. Or how about just listening when she talks? You know, it's not that fucking hard to stop thinking about yourself for five minutes and hear what she has to say. Think about it- way back when, when you were getting your brains fucked out on a regular basis- what were YOU doing differently than you're doing now? Planning dates, telling her she looked nice, acting like you're happy to be with her? A thousand dollars says if you do that stuff again you'll get the same result. 3. Your kids are NOT the reason you're staying married. If you were THAT miserable, you'd leave whether you had kids or not. If you're not getting a divorce it's because YOU DON'T WANT TO. For whatever reason. At least be honest and don't try to feed people that tired bullshit line about staying married for the kids. Contrary to what you think, it doesn't make you look like a poor suffering but honorable victim. You obviously don't care enough about your kids to treat their mother with enough respect not to cheat on her, and you don't care about them enough to spend time with THEM instead of some cheap whore, so cut it out with that crap. There is absolutely nothing honorable about putting your dick ahead of your kids. If you really really cared about them, you would put ALL your time and effort and money into saving the one thing that means most to them in the whole world- your marriage and their family. Otherwise you're full of shit. 4. We all know how bored you are. Poor you, someone should really come along to entertain you. What are you, fucking 12 years old? If you're bored with your marriage, it's because YOU'RE BORING, and have you ever stopped to think that if you're bored, she probably is too. But instead of throwing a temper tantrum like a 2 year old, she's at home cleaning out the lint trap on the dryer and washing kool-aid off the kitchen floor. Yeah, she's having a fucking riot washing your underwear and cleaning up cat puke. Marriage is hard work. Hell, life is hard work. Grow the fuck up and take some responsibility for yourself. You have a brain, USE it. Put some thought into your marriage and some effort into your life and stop blaming her and being a baby because life isn't fun. 5. You're looking for someone "younger". Sure you are. Dickhead. You think you look the same as you did when you got married? I'd bet not. Even if you do, you haven't spent the last 10 years having babies (the ones YOU wanted) and sacrificing your body for them. The next time you have to have someone stitch your asshole together because your just pushed a watermelon out of your butt, then you can sqwauk. If you ever spend 9 months with your belly stretched to obscene proportions, and manage to look exactly the same as you used to 6 weeks later, then you can bitch about how she's not attractive anymore. Until then, shut the fuck up. You have no concept of what she has sacrificed to give you the children you claim to love. You really think she wants varicose veins and stretch marks and saggy boobs? Get real. What she wants is a man who understands and values WHY she has varicose veins and stretch marks and saggy boobs. She wants a man who loves her because she was willing to make those sacrifices with her own body because she loves HIM. Instead, you criticize and go running off with the first perky 25 year old who gives you the time of day. Asshole. 6. And finally, if you're cheating on your wife, there's something wrong with YOU. If you're not happy with your marriage, exactly how do you think fucking some slut is going to fix that? Exactly how is that going to make anyone happy? Have you ever actually heard of adultery working out really well for everyone involved? Are you actually stupid enough to think that you're going to be the exception to that rule? If so, you are delusional and you need professional help. Affairs are disasters- not some of the time, not most of the time, ALL OF THE TIME. You guilt will drive you crazy. Someone WILL find out. You will NOT be able to keep up the lies and the deception. And it will all lead up to a disaster of epic proportions, which leads me to Lucky #7. 7. Here's what you can expect in the wake of your little fuck-fest: Divorce- this is where you lose everything- your wife, your house, half your income and possessions, possibly your job if you're stupid enough to be fucking around with a co-worker, your kids- EVERYTHING. You will LOSE IT ALL. Exposure- this is where everyone finds out what a scumbag you are. And they WILL find out. Your boss, your co-workers, your friends, your family, HER family, your neighbors, the parents of your kids' friends, everyone at your church. They WILL find out. Why? Because your now ex-wife will tell them. She will probably tell everyone she knows, and everyone you know, and she will feel good doing it. Consider yourself lucky if she doesn't rent a billboard. Otherwise, all bets are off. Be prepared. Your Kids- this is where you totally lose the respect of your kids, and you deserve to lose it. They will realize in pretty short order that you didn't care enough about them to keep your fucking pants on. They will see their mother cry and they will hate you for it. They will end up shuttling back and forth between their home and your apartment, and they will hate you for it. Every time they have to tell someone that their parents are divorced, they will hate you for it. And God forbid you decide to "introduce" them to your shiny new soulmate/fuckbuddy, they will REALLY hate you for that. If your kids are really young, you have a little time before all this shit hits the fan, but be warned, it's coming. They will forever see you as the moron who broke up their family. They will know that you can't be trusted, that you are weak and immoral and selfish. And they'll figure it out all by themselves, even if you never talk to them about it. Because your kids are smarter than you are at this point. So, go ahead and whine your pathetic bullshit about how you're a victim and your wife is a horrible shrew. Do your best to convince yourself that you didn't have any choice and your wife "drove you to it." Start with the rationalizations and justifications now, you're going to need a lot of them. Remember that the best defense is a good offense and start a mental list of all the ways your wife is deficient. Make sure to re-write the history of your marriage so that you can say that you were miserable from the first day. Be sure to tell your wife that you love her, you're just not "in love" with her anymore. Deal with your guilt by lashing out at everyone around you. Above all, take no responsibility for any problems YOU may have that caused you to be such a spineless bastard in the first place. Congratulations, you've just joined the Adulterers Club. See you in hell.

08-24-2006, 04:26 PM	#3
ne0 Confirmed User Join Date: May 2006 Location: brazil Posts: 781	You're right. If you cant make one happy why having two __________________ hai2u

08-24-2006, 04:26 PM	#5
Belinda NubilesCash.com Manager Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: NorCal Posts: 4,365	damn that is a long read __________________ NEW SITES FROM NUBILESCASH.COM MomLover.com, FamilySwap.xxx Skype- belindam81 Email: [email protected]

08-24-2006, 04:26 PM	#6
Ice Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Sunny California Posts: 26,053	Feel the love __________________ icq 1904905

08-24-2006, 04:27 PM	#9
Libertine sex dwarf Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 17,860	In other words: hell hath no whining like a woman dumped. __________________ /(bb\|[^b]{2})/

08-24-2006, 04:25 PM	#2
AaronM Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: ┌∩┐ ◣_◢ ┌∩┐ Posts: 46,909	I just wanna cuddle with Donny.

08-24-2006, 04:26 PM	#4
Bro Media - BANNED FOR LIFE MOBILE PORN: IMOBILEPORN Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Tinseltown NL Posts: 16,502	cliff notes?

08-24-2006, 04:27 PM	#7
blazi Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Closer now Posts: 4,321	marriage is so 19th century!! __________________ makingcoin.com - 100% payouts coinscuties.com

08-24-2006, 04:27 PM	#8
wdsguy Ryde or Die Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: California-Shanghai Posts: 19,568	takes down my craigslist post

08-24-2006, 04:37 PM	#16
Belinda NubilesCash.com Manager Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: NorCal Posts: 4,365	You can cuddle him when you get here. __________________ NEW SITES FROM NUBILESCASH.COM MomLover.com, FamilySwap.xxx Skype- belindam81 Email: [email protected]

08-24-2006, 04:48 PM	#21
BoyAlley So Fucking Gay Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 19,714	omg that's pretty funny

08-24-2006, 04:53 PM	#26
E$_manager Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: pink adult dreams Posts: 13,557	Donny, you are so right posting it that i feel a relative soul in you and wonder are you really a man? __________________ Enjoy more sales with EnjoyBucks! Homemade: Asian : Ebony : GFs : Voyeur : Nudist : Public : 3D

08-24-2006, 05:22 PM	#34
cyberstar Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Paradise Posts: 1,263	great read... i bet the person who wrote that is not married :P __________________ Star @ ShockMediaLab 250-060-302 web design, development, gallery submissions, outsourcing

08-24-2006, 06:37 PM	#36
Bama Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Redmond, WA Posts: 2,727	Sounds like somebody has massive anger for blowing countless numbers of married guys and buying the "i'll leave her for you, but just not yet......uhhhhh you are going to swallow that right?" line

08-24-2006, 07:35 PM	#37
rodney25 Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 7,090	Thank goodness, I'm still single. __________________ AFFORDABLE Hosting -- Extreme Dependability -- FULL Service ICQ ME for DAMN GOOD HOSTING DEALS: 5380773

08-24-2006, 07:42 PM	#39
Jace FBOP Class Of 2013 Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: bumfuck, ky Posts: 35,562	isn't it annoying when people quote really long posts and just type a two word reply at the end? anyway, excellent shit donny...I am sending that to everyone I know...LOL...mostly the cheater assholes

08-24-2006, 07:44 PM	#41
tony286 lurker Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: atlanta Posts: 57,021	man having a bad day lol

08-24-2006, 07:46 PM	#42
JD Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 22,651	this thread needs more jellyfish

08-24-2006, 07:48 PM	#43
AsianDivaGirlsWebDude Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: San Francisco Bay Area Posts: 38,323	ADG Webmaster __________________ Asian Diva Girls - Exclusive Photos and Videos Asian Diva Girls Affiliate Program (50% ccBill Revshare)

08-24-2006, 07:50 PM	#44
E$_manager Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: pink adult dreams Posts: 13,557	That was really a good reading. I am gonna safe it. __________________ Enjoy more sales with EnjoyBucks! Homemade: Asian : Ebony : GFs : Voyeur : Nudist : Public : 3D

08-24-2006, 07:53 PM	#45
BlackCrayon Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Ottawa Posts: 19,631	um, im pretty damn sure i read that you cheated on your ex-wife donny. __________________ you don't know you're wearing a leash if you sit by the peg all day..

08-24-2006, 07:57 PM	#46
Drake Hello world! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 12,508	If my spouse doesn't cheat like everybody else does, I'm going to feel cheated.

08-24-2006, 08:12 PM	#48
GatorB The Demon & 12clicks Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: SallyRand is a FAGGOT Posts: 18,208	Women cheat too. I know this for a fact.

08-24-2006, 08:26 PM	#49
minusonebit So Fucking Banned Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: [email protected] Posts: 7,391	Damn, someone needs to put thier bible away.

08-24-2006, 08:42 PM	#50
iwantchixx Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Boonies Posts: 12,860	thats fuckign retarted.. Sometimes the wifey really is the problem.. It's called being female and not always getting their way anymore.