Why I Fired My Secretary... - GoFuckYourself.com

Empress_JoinRightNow · 12-12-2006, 05:35 AM

LAST WEEK WAS MY BIRTHDAY AND I DIDN'T FEEL VERY WELL WAKING UP THAT
MORNING.

I WENT DOWNSTAIRS FOR BREAKFAST HOPING MY WIFE WOULD BE PLEASANT AND
SAY, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!", AND POSSIBLY HAVE A PRESENT FOR ME.

AS IT TURNED OUT, SHE BARELY SAID GOOD MORNING, LET ALONE "HAPPY
BIRTHDAY."

I THOUGHT... WELL, THAT'S MARRIAGE FOR YOU, BUT THE KIDS WILL
REMEMBER.

MY KIDS CAME INTO BREAKFAST AND DIDN'T SAY A WORD. SO WHEN I LEFT FOR
THE OFFICE, I WAS FEELING PRETTY LOW AND SOMEWHAT DESPONDENT.
AS I WALKED INTO MY OFFICE, MY SECRETARY JANE SAID, "GOOD MORNING,
BOSS,HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

IT FELT A LITTLE BETTER THAT AT LEAST SOMEONE HAD REMEMBERED.
I WORKED UNTIL ONE O'CLOCK AND THEN JANE KNOCKED ON MY DOOR AND SAID,
"YOU KNOW, IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY OUTSIDE, AND IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY,
LET'S GO OUT TO LUNCH, JUST YOU AND ME."

I SAID, "THANKS JANE, THAT'S THE GREATEST THING I'VE HEARD ALL DAY.
LET'S GO!"

WE WENT TO LUNCH. BUT WE DIDN'T GO WHERE WE NORMALLY WOULD GO.

WE DINED INSTEAD AT A LITTLE PLACE WITH A PRIVATE TABLE. WE HAD TWO
MARTINIS EACH AND I ENJOYED THE MEAL TREMENDOUSLY ON THE WAY BACK TO
THE OFFICE, JANE SAID, "YOU KNOW, IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY... WE
DON'T NEED TO GO BACK TO THE OFFICE, DO WE?"

I RESPONDED, "I GUESS NOT. WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN MIND?"

SHE SAID, "LET'S GO TO MY APARTMENT."

AFTER ARRIVING AT HER APARTMENT JANE TURNED TO ME AND SAID, "BOSS, IF
YOU DON'T MIND, I'M GOING TO STEP INTO THE BEDROOM FOR A MOMENT.
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK."
OK." I NERVOUSLY REPLIED.

SHE WENT INTO THE BEDROOM AND, AFTER A COUPLE OF MINUTES, SHE CAME OUT
CARRYING A HUGE BIRTHDAY CAKE... FOLLOWED BY MY WIFE, KIDS, AND DOZENS
OF MY FRIENDS AND CO-WORKERS, ALL SINGING "HAPPY BIRTHDAY".

AND I JUST SAT THERE...

ON THE COUCH...

NAKED....

That's why I fired my secretary!

killerkay · 12-12-2006, 05:44 AM

hehe oldie but goodie

timberlands · 12-12-2006, 05:48 AM

thats what you get

VegasKingPin · 12-12-2006, 05:50 AM

thats fucking piss funny bro

Crasy Bitch · 12-12-2006, 05:53 AM

lol I love it

Pete-KT · 12-12-2006, 05:54 AM

thats funny and old

E$_manager · 12-12-2006, 06:04 AM

THat is a funny anecdote. Old, but funny.

bobby666 · 12-12-2006, 06:26 AM

old old story , older than jesus

salesman · 12-12-2006, 01:29 PM

that's good, man, I've never heard that before, really, it was new for me

4Man · 12-12-2006, 01:38 PM

I hate this job of secretary.

needlive · 12-12-2006, 01:41 PM

Nice story

aico · 12-12-2006, 01:43 PM

That would have been funnier with the cap locks off.

_Richard_ · 12-12-2006, 01:48 PM

rofl.. that's awesome

R

BluewireAngie · 12-12-2006, 01:49 PM

nice one!

everestcash · 12-12-2006, 02:51 PM

unreadable (

TheDatingNetworkCameron · 12-12-2006, 03:12 PM

LOL great joke.

sicone · 12-12-2006, 03:14 PM

amandaspost · 12-12-2006, 03:24 PM

woj · 12-12-2006, 03:36 PM

reynold · 12-12-2006, 09:53 PM

Classic birthday surprise!

Przemek · 12-13-2006, 01:56 AM

Lol, gotta spread it, thanks

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude · 12-13-2006, 02:04 AM

ADG Webmaster

martinsc · 12-13-2006, 02:05 AM

oldie, but still funny

jacked · 12-13-2006, 02:06 AM

that was pretty dam funny

cheekycherry · 12-13-2006, 02:32 AM

Old But Very Very Funny Lol

marko13 · 12-13-2006, 03:21 AM

hehehhe.... that is so funny.... it cracks me....

12-12-2006, 05:35 AM	#1
Empress_JoinRightNow Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Montreal Posts: 1,207	Why I Fired My Secretary... LAST WEEK WAS MY BIRTHDAY AND I DIDN'T FEEL VERY WELL WAKING UP THAT MORNING. I WENT DOWNSTAIRS FOR BREAKFAST HOPING MY WIFE WOULD BE PLEASANT AND SAY, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!", AND POSSIBLY HAVE A PRESENT FOR ME. AS IT TURNED OUT, SHE BARELY SAID GOOD MORNING, LET ALONE "HAPPY BIRTHDAY." I THOUGHT... WELL, THAT'S MARRIAGE FOR YOU, BUT THE KIDS WILL REMEMBER. MY KIDS CAME INTO BREAKFAST AND DIDN'T SAY A WORD. SO WHEN I LEFT FOR THE OFFICE, I WAS FEELING PRETTY LOW AND SOMEWHAT DESPONDENT. AS I WALKED INTO MY OFFICE, MY SECRETARY JANE SAID, "GOOD MORNING, BOSS,HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" IT FELT A LITTLE BETTER THAT AT LEAST SOMEONE HAD REMEMBERED. I WORKED UNTIL ONE O'CLOCK AND THEN JANE KNOCKED ON MY DOOR AND SAID, "YOU KNOW, IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY OUTSIDE, AND IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY, LET'S GO OUT TO LUNCH, JUST YOU AND ME." I SAID, "THANKS JANE, THAT'S THE GREATEST THING I'VE HEARD ALL DAY. LET'S GO!" WE WENT TO LUNCH. BUT WE DIDN'T GO WHERE WE NORMALLY WOULD GO. WE DINED INSTEAD AT A LITTLE PLACE WITH A PRIVATE TABLE. WE HAD TWO MARTINIS EACH AND I ENJOYED THE MEAL TREMENDOUSLY ON THE WAY BACK TO THE OFFICE, JANE SAID, "YOU KNOW, IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY... WE DON'T NEED TO GO BACK TO THE OFFICE, DO WE?" I RESPONDED, "I GUESS NOT. WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN MIND?" SHE SAID, "LET'S GO TO MY APARTMENT." AFTER ARRIVING AT HER APARTMENT JANE TURNED TO ME AND SAID, "BOSS, IF YOU DON'T MIND, I'M GOING TO STEP INTO THE BEDROOM FOR A MOMENT. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK." OK." I NERVOUSLY REPLIED. SHE WENT INTO THE BEDROOM AND, AFTER A COUPLE OF MINUTES, SHE CAME OUT CARRYING A HUGE BIRTHDAY CAKE... FOLLOWED BY MY WIFE, KIDS, AND DOZENS OF MY FRIENDS AND CO-WORKERS, ALL SINGING "HAPPY BIRTHDAY". AND I JUST SAT THERE... ON THE COUCH... NAKED.... That's why I fired my secretary! __________________

12-12-2006, 05:48 AM	#3
timberlands Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 504	thats what you get Last edited by timberlands; 12-12-2006 at 05:49 AM..

12-12-2006, 05:53 AM	#5
Crasy Bitch Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Ottawa, Canada Posts: 598	lol I love it __________________ Behind every great woman, is a guy looking at her ass.

12-12-2006, 06:04 AM	#7
E$_manager Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: pink adult dreams Posts: 13,557	THat is a funny anecdote. Old, but funny. __________________ Enjoy more sales with EnjoyBucks! Homemade: Asian : Ebony : GFs : Voyeur : Nudist : Public : 3D

12-12-2006, 06:26 AM	#8
bobby666 boots are my religion Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Heart of europe Posts: 21,765	old old story , older than jesus __________________

12-12-2006, 05:44 AM	#2
killerkay Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: amish paradise Posts: 1,482	hehe oldie but goodie

12-12-2006, 05:50 AM	#4
VegasKingPin Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 312	thats fucking piss funny bro

12-12-2006, 05:54 AM	#6
Pete-KT Workin With The Devil Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: West Bloomfield, MI Posts: 51,532	thats funny and old

12-12-2006, 01:29 PM	#9
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12-12-2006, 01:38 PM	#10
4Man Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 3,830	I hate this job of secretary.

12-12-2006, 01:41 PM	#11
needlive Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 2,191	Nice story __________________ http://www.needlive.com Adult XXX Cams

12-12-2006, 01:43 PM	#12
aico Moo Moo Cow Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Washington State Posts: 14,748	That would have been funnier with the cap locks off.

12-12-2006, 01:48 PM	#13
_Richard_ Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Earth Posts: 30,989	rofl.. that's awesome R

12-12-2006, 01:49 PM	#14
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12-12-2006, 02:51 PM	#15
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12-12-2006, 03:12 PM	#16
TheDatingNetworkCameron Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Toronto, Ontario Posts: 581	LOL great joke. __________________ TheDatingNetwork.com Cameron Steer - Business Development Skype: Cameron.Steer3 Well sell our Email traffic! Hit me up!

12-12-2006, 03:14 PM	#17
sicone Retired Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Sac Posts: 18,453	__________________

12-12-2006, 03:24 PM	#18
amandaspost Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: New Jersey Posts: 1,935

12-12-2006, 03:36 PM	#19
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12-12-2006, 09:53 PM	#20
reynold Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Global Traveler Posts: 51,271	Classic birthday surprise!

12-13-2006, 01:56 AM	#21
Przemek Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 417	Lol, gotta spread it, thanks __________________ PinkMedia Cash www.fuckmypolishthroat.com - deep throat www.pigfights.com - female fights

12-13-2006, 02:04 AM	#22
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12-13-2006, 02:05 AM	#23
martinsc Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: 127.0.0.1 Posts: 27,047	oldie, but still funny __________________ Make Money

12-13-2006, 02:06 AM	#24
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12-13-2006, 02:32 AM	#25
cheekycherry Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: N/A Posts: 1,703	Old But Very Very Funny Lol

12-13-2006, 03:21 AM	#26
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