Invasion: China is tunneling through the earth - GoFuckYourself.com

[H] · 10-02-2002, 05:27 PM

BEIJING -- Communism-crazed leaders in Red China have reportedly embarked on a bizarre new plan to invade America -- by digging a tunnel right through the center of the Earth!

A U.S. intelligence source claims that the ambitious, top-secret project is well under way and that Chinese tunnel rats have already dug down a mind-bending 104,000 feet -- nearly 20 miles beneath the Earth?s surface.

?If all goes according to plan, within six years they?ll break through on the other side, we believe somewhere in Oklahoma, around the Bartlesville area,? reveals the high-level source at the National Security Agency (NSA).

?Roughly 500 million bloodthirsty, screaming Chinese troops will come pouring out of that hole -- hell-bent on a bold mission to conquer the United States, reduce our people to slavery and seize all our women.?

The People?s Tunnel, as the ultra-secret project is known, was originally the brainchild of Chairman Mao Zedong, father of modern-day China.

?Back in the late 1960s, when China and the United States were at each other?s throats, Mao proposed building such a tunnel,? says the source. ?But at the time, it just wasn?t technically feasible because the drilling equipment available in China was so primitive. After Nixon went to China and U.S.-Sino relations started to warm up, the plan was put on the back burner.?

But two years ago, Chinese leaders took a fresh look at the idea.

?China has over a billion people and it doesn?t have the resources to feed them,? says the source. ?Because of the one-child-per-family policy and widespread abortion for sex-selection, men outnumber women by many times.

?They need grain, they need land -- and most of all, they need women.?

Lev · 10-02-2002, 05:29 PM

yeah ok...

Babaganoosh · 10-02-2002, 05:29 PM

Massivecock, is that you again?

I hope they remember this half-baked planet has a chewy red center.

WiredGuy · 10-02-2002, 05:54 PM

Someone been reading The Onion?
WG

Fletch XXX · 10-02-2002, 05:55 PM

10-02-2002, 05:58 PM

[H] as in hardocp ?

Zebra · 10-02-2002, 06:36 PM

Bartlesville, Oklahoma? Damn, that is only an hour away.. good thing I like Chinese food!

Chickety China, the Chinese chicken.. you have?

Honeyslut · 10-02-2002, 06:58 PM

You mean I will finally get laid ?

Pipecrew · 10-02-2002, 06:59 PM

Metaform You here this? you can start up a rice rocket dealeship, it will do excellent

[H] · 10-03-2002, 01:22 AM

watch out Oklahoma, the chinese mole people are coming.

Rocky · 10-03-2002, 01:28 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Armed & Hammered
Massivecock, is that you again?

I hope they remember this half-baked planet has a chewy red center.

Jizar II · 10-03-2002, 02:29 AM

ADL Colin · 10-03-2002, 02:40 AM

They should at least make these jokes more realistic.
Digging a whole from China through the
center of the Earth would end up in the Southern Hemisphere.

Smegma · 10-03-2002, 02:49 AM

I tried this when I was a kid. Good fucking luck. I hit water in 5 minutes, gave up, and went back inside and played pacman.

Jon · 10-03-2002, 02:53 AM

oh wow those chinamen are some funny fucks. what would be just so american like is 1 trigger happy american commando with a few grenades. he chucks them into the hole when they get close and it becomes congested with china-men parts. that blows their whole plan..

why dont they just take one of the tanker ships to america, kidnap a whole shitload of our ugly women and female prisoners, and haul ass back to china.

Milkipiades · 10-03-2002, 03:52 AM

US troops have some work to do....

MetaformX · 10-03-2002, 04:01 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Pipecrew
Metaform You here this? you can start up a rice rocket dealeship, it will do excellent

you are so right pipe! maybe if I have a rice rocket dealership, the chinese will allow me to live while they enslave you and the rest of the rice haters. Make sure you don't piss off Jun Wu Tu too much, or he may just give you some of his man love

Apollo · 10-03-2002, 04:13 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Smegma
I tried this when I was a kid. Good fucking luck. I hit water in 5 minutes, gave up, and went back inside and played pacman.

Wow, someone else who shared the samed problem as me when I was a kid. Glad to know there's someone else out there

EscortBiz · 10-03-2002, 06:49 AM

if they get stuck in the tunnel ya think the US will dispatch a rescue team?

Socks · 10-03-2002, 06:53 AM

I got linked on HardOCP once for my last site.. Slashdot a few times too.. Woop

AzteK · 10-03-2002, 07:40 AM

?They need grain, they need land -- and most of all, they need women.?

haha hide your wives cause here they come!

GregP · 10-03-2002, 07:54 AM

Let them invade , I should be able to handle at least 30 of the little guys.

10-02-2002, 05:27 PM	#1
[H] So Fucking Banned Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 103	Invasion: China is tunneling through the earth BEIJING -- Communism-crazed leaders in Red China have reportedly embarked on a bizarre new plan to invade America -- by digging a tunnel right through the center of the Earth! A U.S. intelligence source claims that the ambitious, top-secret project is well under way and that Chinese tunnel rats have already dug down a mind-bending 104,000 feet -- nearly 20 miles beneath the Earth?s surface. ?If all goes according to plan, within six years they?ll break through on the other side, we believe somewhere in Oklahoma, around the Bartlesville area,? reveals the high-level source at the National Security Agency (NSA). ?Roughly 500 million bloodthirsty, screaming Chinese troops will come pouring out of that hole -- hell-bent on a bold mission to conquer the United States, reduce our people to slavery and seize all our women.? The People?s Tunnel, as the ultra-secret project is known, was originally the brainchild of Chairman Mao Zedong, father of modern-day China. ?Back in the late 1960s, when China and the United States were at each other?s throats, Mao proposed building such a tunnel,? says the source. ?But at the time, it just wasn?t technically feasible because the drilling equipment available in China was so primitive. After Nixon went to China and U.S.-Sino relations started to warm up, the plan was put on the back burner.? But two years ago, Chinese leaders took a fresh look at the idea. ?China has over a billion people and it doesn?t have the resources to feed them,? says the source. ?Because of the one-child-per-family policy and widespread abortion for sex-selection, men outnumber women by many times. ?They need grain, they need land -- and most of all, they need women.?

10-02-2002, 05:29 PM	#3
Babaganoosh ♥♥♥ Likes Hugs ♥♥♥ Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: /home Posts: 15,841	Massivecock, is that you again? I hope they remember this half-baked planet has a chewy red center. __________________ I like pie.

10-02-2002, 05:54 PM	#4
WiredGuy Pounding Googlebot Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 34,482	Someone been reading The Onion? WG __________________ I play with Google.

10-02-2002, 05:55 PM	#5
Fletch XXX GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: that 504 Posts: 60,840	__________________ Want an Android App for your tube, membership, or free site? Need banners or promo material? Hit us up (ICQ Fletch: 148841377) or email me fletchxxx at gmail.com - recent work - About me

10-02-2002, 06:36 PM	#7
Zebra Banned from Kimmy's couch Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Down at Fraggle Rock Posts: 5,091	Bartlesville, Oklahoma? Damn, that is only an hour away.. good thing I like Chinese food! Chickety China, the Chinese chicken.. you have? __________________ Old School

10-02-2002, 05:29 PM	#2
Lev Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2001 Posts: 3,545	yeah ok...

10-02-2002, 05:58 PM	#6
X37375787 Guest Posts: n/a	[H] as in hardocp ?

10-02-2002, 06:58 PM	#8
Honeyslut Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Ass Valley, Ca Posts: 6,436	You mean I will finally get laid ? __________________ http://nakedlunchnews.comWhat's up ? Naked Lunch News !

10-02-2002, 06:59 PM	#9
Pipecrew Master of Gfy.com Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2002 Posts: 14,887	Metaform You here this? you can start up a rice rocket dealeship, it will do excellent

10-03-2002, 01:22 AM	#10
[H] So Fucking Banned Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 103	watch out Oklahoma, the chinese mole people are coming.

10-03-2002, 02:29 AM	#12
Jizar II Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: May 2001 Location: LLL© Posts: 1,425	LOL

10-03-2002, 02:40 AM	#13
ADL Colin Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Tube Titans, USA Posts: 11,929	They should at least make these jokes more realistic. Digging a whole from China through the center of the Earth would end up in the Southern Hemisphere. __________________ Adult Date Link - $50 PPS starting NOW! -- good and JUICY! skype = "adultdatelink"

10-03-2002, 02:49 AM	#14
Smegma Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2002 Posts: 1,751	I tried this when I was a kid. Good fucking luck. I hit water in 5 minutes, gave up, and went back inside and played pacman. __________________ <a href="http://www.jupiterhosting.com"><img src="http://www.jupiterhosting.com/banners/55x55.jupiter.gif" alt="" border="0" align=""></a>

10-03-2002, 02:53 AM	#15
Jon Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: New York City Posts: 2,578	oh wow those chinamen are some funny fucks. what would be just so american like is 1 trigger happy american commando with a few grenades. he chucks them into the hole when they get close and it becomes congested with china-men parts. that blows their whole plan.. why dont they just take one of the tanker ships to america, kidnap a whole shitload of our ugly women and female prisoners, and haul ass back to china. __________________ WickedFire.com - Stay here. We don't need more of you. Not unless you have money, then, fine...

10-03-2002, 03:52 AM	#16
Milkipiades Registered User Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Right here Posts: 84	US troops have some work to do.... __________________ Life sux .... - get a helm

10-03-2002, 06:49 AM	#19
EscortBiz Fuck Checks, CASH only! Join Date: May 2002 Location: New York City Posts: 19,422	if they get stuck in the tunnel ya think the US will dispatch a rescue team? __________________ Spanking, Medical Fetish, Sleeping, Strap-on Anal Lesbians, Girls Fucking Guys, Handjob site REAL HOT, Shemales, Anal and Ass Licking sites 100% Real EXCLUSIVE with amazing retention, ccbill payouts, lots of content FREE FTP HOSTING Promote the largest and oldest member paid escort site, Converts 10 times better then any dating site, CCBill payouts ICQ# 158802076

10-03-2002, 06:53 AM	#20
Socks Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: May 2002 Location: Toronto Posts: 8,475	I got linked on HardOCP once for my last site.. Slashdot a few times too.. Woop

10-03-2002, 07:40 AM	#21
AzteK Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Northern Cali, USA Posts: 3,445	?They need grain, they need land -- and most of all, they need women.? haha hide your wives cause here they come!

10-03-2002, 07:54 AM	#22
GregP Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada Posts: 539	Let them invade , I should be able to handle at least 30 of the little guys.