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#1 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: NJ
Posts: 13,334
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*** Joe Republican ****
Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards.
With his first swallow of coffee, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to insure their safety and that they work as advertised. All but $10 of Joe's medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too. He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry. In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body and how much it contained. Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. the air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for laws to stop industries from polluting our air. He walks to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor. Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy liberal union members fought and died for these working standards. Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal didn't think he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune. Its noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so the can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the GreatDepression. Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money over his lifetime. After work this evening, Joe plans to visit his father at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car safety standards. He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification. Joe is happy to see his father, who is now retired and lives on Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to. Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day. Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of themselves, just like I have."
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ISeekGirls.com since 2005 |
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#2 |
So Fucking Banned
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: I convert perverts like catholic church!
Posts: 5,133
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ll that was great !
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#3 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
Industry Role:
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Narnia
Posts: 10,764
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Yeah, damn hippies!
Always trying to be so nice to each other... who needs em anyway? Turn on Fucked Noise for the real facts - fair and balanced! |
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#4 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Punta Cana, DR
Posts: 29,601
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nice ...
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I know that Asspimple is stoopid ... As he says, it is a FACT ! But I can't figure out how he can breathe or type , at the same time .... |
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#5 |
working on my tan
Industry Role:
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Florida/Kentucky
Posts: 39,151
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Joe almost always votes Republican because the Democrats have a habit of shooting themselves in the foot when nominating someone for president.
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#6 | |
Too lazy to set a custom title
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: NJ
Posts: 13,334
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Quote:
HUh?? ![]()
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ISeekGirls.com since 2005 |
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#7 |
A freakin' legend!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada USA
Posts: 18,975
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If you think Democratic policies make a state a good place to live, then you really need to move to Rhode Island. ASAP! It is virtually a single party state, dominated by the Dems.
There you will find a workers paradise!! The welfare benefits are the best in the country. Lots of poor people and illegal immigrants are flooding in to enjoy it. The unions run the entire state. You will be very happy! Corruption is rampant, electricity cost is sky high, insurance cost is sky high, and they have highest taxes in the country. Please move there! They need more people, especially taxpayers. The state is so wonderful that I moved out because I felt guilty about taking up space there when others could be enjoying it. ;)
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Boner Money |
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#8 |
A freakin' legend!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada USA
Posts: 18,975
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I forgot to mention that RI has a $600 million deficit.
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Boner Money |
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#9 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
Industry Role:
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Punta Cana, DR
Posts: 29,601
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You also forgot to mention the USA deficit ... damn democrats ....
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I know that Asspimple is stoopid ... As he says, it is a FACT ! But I can't figure out how he can breathe or type , at the same time .... |
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#10 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: The Valley
Posts: 7,412
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![]() Good post. ![]() Partisanship for the sake of partisanship is silly.
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-D. ICQ: 202-96-31 |
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#11 | |
Apocalypse
Industry Role:
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Limbo
Posts: 3,043
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The Democrat version (not written by me):
Quote:
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#12 | |
Apocalypse
Industry Role:
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Limbo
Posts: 3,043
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Another one (also not by me):
Quote:
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#13 |
Just Du It
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 12,094
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#14 |
lurker
Industry Role:
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: atlanta
Posts: 57,021
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The republican one is very true the joe democrat is sour grapes and most listen to the pundits as gospel and vote against their own interests.Its very sad.
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#15 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 5,687
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__________________
No doubt one may quote history to support any cause, as the devil quotes scripture. -- Learned Hand http://www.bjpenn.com |
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#16 | |
Too lazy to set a custom title
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: NJ
Posts: 13,334
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Quote:
Republican get all knotted up like a sphincter when you point out the truth.
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#17 | |
A freakin' legend!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada USA
Posts: 18,975
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Quote:
The government corruption, welfare fraud, and other pillaging in RI won't ever help our society.
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Boner Money |
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#18 |
So Fucking Banned
Industry Role:
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: the beach, SoCal
Posts: 107,089
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#19 | |
A freakin' legend!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada USA
Posts: 18,975
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Quote:
ALWAYS THANK LIBERALS FOR YOUR HIGH TAXES.
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Boner Money |
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#20 |
A freakin' legend!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada USA
Posts: 18,975
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This is a fun one too:
The Mob That Whacked Jersey How rapacious government withered the Garden State http://www.city-journal.org/html/16_2_new_jersey.html
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Boner Money |
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#21 | |
A freakin' legend!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Las Vegas, Nevada USA
Posts: 18,975
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Quote:
If you enjoyed that one, then you will enjoy this one too: The Conspiracy Against the Taxpayers http://www.city-journal.org/html/15_4_taxpayers.html
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Boner Money |
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#22 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: GFY
Posts: 5,176
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GOP forever.
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ICQ 557504926 |
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#23 |
lurker
Industry Role:
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: atlanta
Posts: 57,021
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#24 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: GFY
Posts: 5,176
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"Republicans are true Americans, Democrats are fake Europeans". Quoting myself.
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ICQ 557504926 |
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#25 |
Confirmed User
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 2,704
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It's a wonder Halbucks could type anything given what he's been putting in his pipe.
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![]() 50/50 lifetime payout - EXCLUSIVE CONTENT - CCBill CLiCK here for your Bun Beating Dollars. |
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#26 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: NJ
Posts: 13,334
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"Joe Republican" house is on fire. The local fire department shows up and saves his house. FILL IN THE BLANK
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#27 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: NJ
Posts: 13,334
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Republicans have battered wife's syndrome!
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#28 |
Let slip the dogs of war.
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Bermuda
Posts: 17,263
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See how nicely you fit in to the groups you're told to belong to? TheSenator, the great liberal defender of Democracy and Daddyhalbucks, the staunch righteous conservative!
"They shout and curse, stabbing wildly; more brawlers than warriors. They make a wondrous mess of things. Brave amateurs...they do their part. " Truth be told, you're both clowns.
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#29 | |
Too lazy to set a custom title
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: NJ
Posts: 13,334
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Quote:
You my freng sound sour.
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#30 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: NJ
Posts: 13,334
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How many Republicans are there on this board?
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