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Old 05-17-2008, 05:51 AM   #1
xxxjay
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Illegal Tube Site Owners: MY OPEN LETTER

So, you think it?s cool to swap MP3s? Sure, I?ve downloaded a song or ten thousand in my time, however: Under no circumstances: Should you ever, ever share PORN! That?s right, our beloved American institution is already in enough financial trouble. The ?talent? doesn?t get paid enough as it is! NOW, there?s barely enough incentive for a maladjusted teen with low self-esteem and a meth habit to start doing triple anal on film!

The cash pornographers lose to PORN THIEVES will translate to pay cuts to the porn girls. As money becomes scarce, the talent pool will dry up. Then people left still buying porn will diminish and sales will plummet. Revenue streams will dry up and Adult industry will go bankrupt.

With no more funds for lawyers, the good folks that run jizz become victims of a republican Witch-hunt and sent to prison. As the studios start fold, millions of Americans, who were quietly leading decent lives behind the scenes in porn will become displaced. These poor souls, unable to find work because of their past, will turn to violent crime. This will overload the court system with the influx of unemployed smut peddlers.

With all the smut peddlers in jail: Porn movies will become a memory of the distant past ? only living as a distant flicker on some file-sharing network!

With the industry out if the way: YOU will the only person the goon squad to come for! The prison system will bog down even more. Eventually, the number of Americans incarcerated will outnumber those on the street. A giant multi-billion dollar sized hole will be left in the economy.

The county will fall into disarray. Merciless budget cuts will be made. Medicare will go first. With the lack of healthcare, new strains of disease will form and reach pandemic levels quickly. With the death of porn, billions will shut off their computers, causing a massive surge on the power grid; leaving the United States powerless.

The only modern connivance left will be automobiles: which the survivors will turn to for heat, shelter and power. The massive release of hydrocarbons will kill all plant life, worldwide oxygen levels will plummet, and pollution will be so thick that it will eventually black out the sun ? thus ending all life, as we know it.

As a last result of the cataclysm, the Moon will be knocked off kilter, and it will collide with the now dead Earth ? sending us hurtling into deep space.

Over millions of years, the remnants our planet will be eroded by the cosmic winds, and will reduce Terra Firma to chunks of astral debris. If we are lucky, the chunks of our once mighty civilization will reenter another world as a shooting star for alien beings to make a wish on?all because:

They were smart enough to NEVER STEAL PORN!!!!
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Old 05-17-2008, 06:56 AM   #2
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I really doubt Illegal Tube Site Owners will read this.

Quote:
YOU will the only person the goon squad to come for! The prison system will bog down even more. Eventually, the number of Americans incarcerated will outnumber those on the street. A giant multi-billion dollar sized hole will be left in the economy.
Whoa that's a hardcore economic forecast! Along with the end of the world stuff.
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Old 05-17-2008, 06:58 AM   #3
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:11 AM   #4
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that is funny as hell
good job
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:19 AM   #5
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LOL

Good analysis...you should sell it to Wall Street Journal
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:33 AM   #6
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Nicely written...

Now the summary: WERE ALL GOING TO DIE!
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:40 AM   #7
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I love these fantasy stories...

More more more....
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:46 AM   #8
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funny shit
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:47 AM   #9
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serious business
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Old 05-17-2008, 09:56 AM   #10
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Yo Jay.. excellent read!!!

Sounds like it would make an awesome screenplay and movie...

We can call it: "Soylent Porn"
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Old 05-17-2008, 10:28 AM   #11
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the text is too long for a tubesite owner's brain
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Old 05-17-2008, 10:54 AM   #12
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Great job
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Old 05-17-2008, 10:58 AM   #13
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You must be on some funky shrooommsss
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Old 05-17-2008, 11:08 AM   #14
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xxxjay=cool..


Great read.. I will hold them and you can punch them..
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Old 05-17-2008, 11:12 AM   #15
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you need to make a video of this open letter

and put it up on youtube.


btw does this mean you have come over to the dark side with all us "fair use" advocates.
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Old 05-17-2008, 11:34 AM   #16
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Old 05-17-2008, 11:48 AM   #17
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Old 05-17-2008, 11:53 AM   #18
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most of the tube owners are not americans anyway, so they don't give a shit.
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Old 05-17-2008, 12:09 PM   #19
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I can see this happening.
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Old 05-17-2008, 12:17 PM   #20
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If you can't beat them, join them :mrgreen:
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Old 05-17-2008, 12:21 PM   #21
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lets all think positive at 4:20 this afternoon pacific time. If we all think positive at that exact moment we will see something happen. A miracle perhaps ...
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Old 05-17-2008, 01:34 PM   #22
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Yo Jay.. excellent read!!!

Sounds like it would make an awesome screenplay and movie...

We can call it: "Soylent Porn"
Ha yeah...that would be good.
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Old 05-17-2008, 02:10 PM   #23
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Huh?

Wut?
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Old 05-17-2008, 03:16 PM   #24
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fuck me we are in alot of trouble
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Old 05-17-2008, 04:12 PM   #25
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I'd hit it!!
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Old 05-17-2008, 04:37 PM   #26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xxxjay View Post
So, you think it?s cool to swap MP3s? Sure, I?ve downloaded a song or ten thousand in my time, however: Under no circumstances: Should you ever, ever share PORN! That?s right, our beloved American institution is already in enough financial trouble. The ?talent? doesn?t get paid enough as it is! NOW, there?s barely enough incentive for a maladjusted teen with low self-esteem and a meth habit to start doing triple anal on film!

The cash pornographers lose to PORN THIEVES will translate to pay cuts to the porn girls. As money becomes scarce, the talent pool will dry up. Then people left still buying porn will diminish and sales will plummet. Revenue streams will dry up and Adult industry will go bankrupt.

With no more funds for lawyers, the good folks that run jizz become victims of a republican Witch-hunt and sent to prison. As the studios start fold, millions of Americans, who were quietly leading decent lives behind the scenes in porn will become displaced. These poor souls, unable to find work because of their past, will turn to violent crime. This will overload the court system with the influx of unemployed smut peddlers.

With all the smut peddlers in jail: Porn movies will become a memory of the distant past ? only living as a distant flicker on some file-sharing network!

With the industry out if the way: YOU will the only person the goon squad to come for! The prison system will bog down even more. Eventually, the number of Americans incarcerated will outnumber those on the street. A giant multi-billion dollar sized hole will be left in the economy.

The county will fall into disarray. Merciless budget cuts will be made. Medicare will go first. With the lack of healthcare, new strains of disease will form and reach pandemic levels quickly. With the death of porn, billions will shut off their computers, causing a massive surge on the power grid; leaving the United States powerless.

The only modern connivance left will be automobiles: which the survivors will turn to for heat, shelter and power. The massive release of hydrocarbons will kill all plant life, worldwide oxygen levels will plummet, and pollution will be so thick that it will eventually black out the sun ? thus ending all life, as we know it.

As a last result of the cataclysm, the Moon will be knocked off kilter, and it will collide with the now dead Earth ? sending us hurtling into deep space.

Over millions of years, the remnants our planet will be eroded by the cosmic winds, and will reduce Terra Firma to chunks of astral debris. If we are lucky, the chunks of our once mighty civilization will reenter another world as a shooting star for alien beings to make a wish on?all because:

They were smart enough to NEVER STEAL PORN!!!!

do you have icq ? i got somethin for you.
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Old 05-17-2008, 04:45 PM   #27
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Hahahahaha
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:03 PM   #28
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The bottom line is don't upload content to tube sites that doesn't belong to you.
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:31 PM   #29
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I love this shit Jay, you have wicked writing skillz man... Hope our path can cross one day!
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:36 PM   #30
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According to Lazy Boy:

"The schools now: It is all about self-esteem in the schools now.
Build the kids' self-esteem, make them feel good about themselves.
If everybody grows up with high self-esteem, who is going to dance in our strip clubs?
What's going to happen to our porno industry?
These women don't just grown on trees.
It takes lots of drunk dads missing dance recitals before you decide to blow a goat on the internet for fifty bucks.
And if that disappears, where does that leave me on a Friday night with my new high speed connection?"
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:41 PM   #31
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Jay.... I keep submitting to ya like it's '00.
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Old 05-17-2008, 07:57 PM   #32
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Save e a spot on your planet. There is no intelligent life here.
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Old 05-17-2008, 08:07 PM   #33
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do you have icq ? i got somethin for you.
62835707 - I can be slow answering it sometimes. [email protected] works best
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Old 05-17-2008, 08:16 PM   #34
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yo call me your house phone is actin kooky. voodoo is pickin me up in a few min.
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Old 05-18-2008, 03:28 PM   #35
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werd....
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Old 05-18-2008, 03:56 PM   #36
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Also don't forget that tube sites fund terrorism and communism.
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Old 05-18-2008, 05:16 PM   #37
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Pardon me, but would anyone happen to have any Grey Poupon?
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Old 05-18-2008, 05:55 PM   #38
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let me help you out.

Противозаконные предприниматели места пробки: МОЕ ОТКРЫТОЕ ПИСЬМО Так, вы думаете что оно холодны для того чтобы обменить MP3s? Конечно, я загружал песню или 10 тысяч в моем времени, как бы: Под никакими обстоятельствами: Если вы всегда, всегда ПОРНОГРАФИЯ доли! То право, наше любимое американское заведение уже внутри достаточная финансовохозяйственная тревога. «Талантливость» не получает оплащенной достаточно по мере того как она! ТЕПЕРЬ, чуть-чуть достаточный стимул для maladjusted предназначенного для подростков с низким самоуважением и привычкой meth, котор нужно начать сделать втройне заднепроходное на пленке! Распространители порнографии наличных дег теряют к ПОХИТИТЕЛЯМ ПОРНОГРАФИИ переведут к урезаниям зарплаты к девушкам порнографии. По мере того как деньги будут вряд, бассеин талантливости высушит вверх. После этого порнография выйденная людьми все еще покупая умалит и сбывания погружаются. Потоки доходов высушат вверх и взрослая индустрия пойдет банкрот. Без больше фондов для законоведов, хорошие люди которые бегут jizz будут жертвами республиканской охоты на ведьм и посланными к тюрьме. По мере того как студии начинают створка, миллионы американцов, которые тихо водили пристойные жизни за местами в порнографии станет смещенной. Эти плохие души, неспособные для того чтобы найти работа из-за их прошлого, повернут к насильственному преступлению. Это перегрузит судебную систему с притоком разносчиков порнографии безработных. С всеми разносчиками порнографии в тюрьме: Кино порнографии станут памятью дистантного прошлого - только живущ как дистантный фликер на некоторой архив-сети! С индустрией вне если путь:, то ВЫ единственная персона отряд чокнутого придете для! Тюремная система трясина опустит даже больше. Окончательно, число incarcerated американцов outnumber те на улице. Гигантским многомиллиардным отверстие определенное размер долларом будет выйдено в экономию. Графство упадет в беспорядок. Безпощадно бюджетные сокращения будут сделаны. Medicare пойдет сперва. С отсутсвием медицинского соревнования, новые напряжения заболевания сформируют и достигнут пандемические уровни быстро. С смертью порнографии, миллиардыы отключат их компьютеры, причиняя массивнейшую пульсацию на решетке силы; выходящ Соединенные Штаты невластной. Единственное самомоднейшее выйденное попустительство будет автомобилями: что оставшийся в живых повернут к для жаре, укрытию и силе. Массивнейший отпуск углеродов убьет всю жизнь растений, всемирные уровни кислорода погружаются, и загрязнение будет настолько толщино что оно окончательно почернит вне солнце - таким образом кончающся вся жизнь, по мере того как мы знаем его. В последний результат катаклизма, луна будет постучана с kilter, и она вступит в противоречия с глухим замыканием на землю now - посылкой нас hurtling в глубокий космос. Над миллионами лет, обмылки наша планета будут выветрены космическими ветрами, и уменьшат Terra Firma к ломтям астральных твердых частиц. Если мы удачливейши, то ломти нашего как только могущественная цивилизация reenter другой мир как звезда стрельбы для alien существований для того чтобы сделать желание на? всех потому что
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Old 05-19-2008, 01:50 PM   #39
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Very well written masterpiece, check out the time it was written.

Makes it even more impressive.
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Old 05-19-2008, 01:54 PM   #40
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You must be on some funky shrooommsss
word
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Old 05-19-2008, 02:09 PM   #41
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Very well written masterpiece, check out the time it was written.

Makes it even more impressive.
Ha, so true.
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Old 05-19-2008, 06:28 PM   #42
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I love this shit Jay, you have wicked writing skillz man... Hope our path can cross one day!
Thanks man!
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Old 05-19-2008, 08:45 PM   #43
Big Red Machine
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Porno Dan View Post
Very well written masterpiece, check out the time it was written.

Makes it even more impressive.
Before 9 am Jay must have been up late
Always great to read things written by Jay he's a Wizzzard with Words
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Old 05-19-2008, 11:11 PM   #44
C H R I S
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words of wisdom.... love it
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Old 05-19-2008, 11:51 PM   #45
Violetta
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do you have icq ? i got somethin for you.
a free tube script that will make you millions!
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Old 10-15-2008, 03:55 PM   #46
DarkJedi
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so how's the fight going jay?

maybe you should stop whining like a lil bitch and do something about it?
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Old 10-15-2008, 03:58 PM   #47
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funny shit
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