Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard! - GoFuckYourself.com

Persius · 01-05-2009, 06:24 PM

It couldn't be simpler!

Check it out here

After Shock Media · 01-05-2009, 06:29 PM

OK I am glad I did not just jump back here after watching a few moments of that to say how absolutely fucking stupid that is. Resisted the urge and did not show everyone that I do not rush to judgement.

tony286 · 01-05-2009, 06:32 PM

that was too funny lol

MaDalton · 01-05-2009, 06:33 PM

nice, i want one ;)

~Ray · 01-05-2009, 06:35 PM

the onion

dav3 · 01-05-2009, 06:41 PM

"Everything is only a few hundred clicks away!"

hahah

hypedough · 01-05-2009, 06:44 PM

I want one!

jmk · 01-05-2009, 06:49 PM

LOL you gotta love the onion!

Grapesoda · 01-05-2009, 06:53 PM

fucking brilliant!

pornguy · 01-05-2009, 07:01 PM

HP has had a touch screen out for 2 months., and we saw a reason the other day that its good to have a keyboard.

A browser was opened and adjusted so that the X was off the top of the screen along with the top of the browser. There was no way to close it other then to reboot the system. No keyboard means no Ctrl Alt Del.

TyroneGoldberg · 01-05-2009, 07:01 PM

love it....

lol

EthnicLover · 01-05-2009, 07:03 PM

"I'll buy almost anything if its shiny and made by Apple"

"Where people use computers for actual work and not just dicking around."

Hey I'm not dicking around. Bitch.

wyldblyss · 01-05-2009, 07:06 PM

"spent 45 minutes typing an email to a friend" lol

HorseShit · 01-05-2009, 07:10 PM

quite the production for something fake

Scroto · 01-05-2009, 07:10 PM

epic failure lol..

abyss_al · 01-05-2009, 07:13 PM

96ukssob · 01-05-2009, 07:13 PM

that is great

TyroneGoldberg · 01-05-2009, 07:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EthnicLover

"I'll buy almost anything if its shiny and made by Apple"

"Where people use computers for actual work and not just dicking around."

Hey I'm not dicking around. Bitch.

that's funny and I use a Mac....

the emails says, 'sent from a Macbook wheel so everyone knows you have one'

9g's for 40GB

to reduce energy screen goes black after 4 seconds

bobby666 · 01-05-2009, 07:36 PM

really an impresive gadget

NaughtyRob · 01-05-2009, 07:58 PM

That shit is lame, I type like 65 wpm and that would slow me down BIGtime.

J$tyle$ · 01-05-2009, 08:06 PM

Jobs: People who use keyboards
'Standing in the way of human progress'

" ... virtually unbreakable unless dropped or hit"

"... they are already hard at work on the next generation of the MacBook Wheel, which will be 4 oz lighter ... due to its lack of a screen, hard drive or wheel"

bronco67 · 01-05-2009, 08:23 PM

"Everything is just a few hundred clicks away"

If you want a good laugh, read some of the "predicted sentences". I was laughing my ass off.

Si · 01-05-2009, 08:26 PM

that is seriously fucked!

Dvae · 01-05-2009, 08:40 PM

An attempt at humor, but FAILED miserably!

Yngwie · 01-05-2009, 08:52 PM

That's nothing. I invented a laptop with no keyboard or wheel. You just use the newly made Clapper to type, open files etc.. One clap = highlight file(s), 2 claps = open file(s) or folder(s). the alphabet clapping technique will take some practice, but after you have it mastered you will be typing at 1000wpm. There are many other features, but they will not be revealed till 3 moths prior to the launch which will be in 2053. What I can tell you is that it will have 256MB of edo ram, an insanely fast dx266 cpu, a large hdd totaling 10MB of space which you can use for anything and everything, TWO floppy drives, a 2400baud modem for super fast internet access and the list goes one.. The best part is the price.. It's will blow EVERYTHING out of the water and only cost $5500. How do we manage to sell for that low? We have made deals with the best hardware providers to give YOU what you need at a price you can afford.

COMING SOON!

qxm · 01-05-2009, 08:59 PM

wow...how stupid is that... I get the fact that anything Apple creates becomes a fashion accessory but ... fuck.. man... 45 mins to type an email... and I woudn't believe anyone who tells me the wheel is more efficient than the keyboard...no fucking way...

If Apple plans to pull this shit out of their asses they better include an optional keyboard .. otherwise this is preposterous Twattlecock! ....

BTW ... congratz to the winners (yeah .. stock owners!)

MikesTraffic · 01-05-2009, 09:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by qxm

wow...how stupid is that... I get the fact that anything Apple creates becomes a fashion accessory but ... fuck.. man... 45 mins to type an email... and I woudn't believe anyone who tells me the wheel is more efficient than the keyboard...no fucking way...

If Apple plans to pull this shit out of their asses they better include an optional keyboard .. otherwise this is preposterous Twattlecock! ....

BTW ... congratz to the winners (yeah .. stock owners!)

umm dude, I'm pretty sure it was just a joke

Adam_M · 01-05-2009, 09:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by qxm

wow...how stupid is that... I get the fact that anything Apple creates becomes a fashion accessory but ... fuck.. man... 45 mins to type an email... and I woudn't believe anyone who tells me the wheel is more efficient than the keyboard...no fucking way...

If Apple plans to pull this shit out of their asses they better include an optional keyboard .. otherwise this is preposterous Twattlecock! ....

BTW ... congratz to the winners (yeah .. stock owners!)

To Funny!

tiger · 01-05-2009, 09:29 PM

Everything is just a few hundred clicks away.

bronco67 · 01-05-2009, 09:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by qxm

wow...how stupid is that... I get the fact that anything Apple creates becomes a fashion accessory but ... fuck.. man... 45 mins to type an email... and I woudn't believe anyone who tells me the wheel is more efficient than the keyboard...no fucking way...

If Apple plans to pull this shit out of their asses they better include an optional keyboard .. otherwise this is preposterous Twattlecock! ....

BTW ... congratz to the winners (yeah .. stock owners!)

Somebody's humor detector has malfunctioned, or maybe this post is brilliant sarcasm.

Iron Fist · 01-05-2009, 10:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by qxm

wow...how stupid is that... I get the fact that anything Apple creates becomes a fashion accessory but ... fuck.. man... 45 mins to type an email... and I woudn't believe anyone who tells me the wheel is more efficient than the keyboard...no fucking way...

If Apple plans to pull this shit out of their asses they better include an optional keyboard .. otherwise this is preposterous Twattlecock! ....

BTW ... congratz to the winners (yeah .. stock owners!)

I see what you did there

NinjaSteve · 01-05-2009, 10:35 PM

Hahaha, automatically says "Sent form a Macbook wheel"

grumpy · 01-06-2009, 01:31 AM

the onion, always good

Mr. E · 01-06-2009, 01:41 AM

hmmm, looks like that would take some getting used to and seems slow. I would love to see one you could just give voice commands to and one that typed what you said to it.

Adam X · 01-06-2009, 01:55 AM

pretty lame.. I can type so fast.. why would I want to scroll for each letter, and it took that guy 45 minutes to type an email..... ridiculous

dav3 · 01-06-2009, 01:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GetNaughty

That shit is lame, I type like 65 wpm and that would slow me down BIGtime.

But DOOOOD! The predicted sentences totally make up for it!!

I am soooo getting one!

Malicious Biz · 01-06-2009, 02:21 AM

"I'll buy anything as long as it's shiny and made by apple"

Haha, I love The Onion.

Walter Gropius · 01-06-2009, 02:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EthnicLover

"I'll buy almost anything if its shiny and made by Apple"

"Where people use computers for actual work and not just dicking around."

Hey I'm not dicking around. Bitch.

Walter Gropius · 01-06-2009, 02:29 AM

My favourite predicted sentence has to be:

"The advertisement was effective."

Brilliant!

Zorgman · 01-06-2009, 02:54 AM

Did they say the battery last for only 19 minutes?

germ · 01-06-2009, 03:34 AM

haha. i love the onion.

After Shock Media · 01-06-2009, 03:40 AM

I love some of the replies here.

qxm · 01-06-2009, 03:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by After Shock Media

I love some of the replies here.

Thank u

... I try to do my best but nowadays it is very hard to please the audience .....

quantum-x · 01-06-2009, 04:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pornguy

HP has had a touch screen out for 2 months., and we saw a reason the other day that its good to have a keyboard.

A browser was opened and adjusted so that the X was off the top of the screen along with the top of the browser. There was no way to close it other then to reboot the system. No keyboard means no Ctrl Alt Del.

Right click on taskbar icon, select move, and move it / close it ?
My computer / taskman / kill process
On screen keyboard..
...

Antonio · 01-06-2009, 05:01 AM

Slappin Fish · 01-06-2009, 06:13 AM

That was funny but some of the replies in this thread scare me

travs · 01-06-2009, 06:16 AM

whoahohohoho nice

Serial Pervert · 01-06-2009, 06:18 AM

very nice!

tranza · 01-06-2009, 06:26 AM

Nice one!!!

Blingbaby · 01-06-2009, 06:34 AM

Duh ok The Onion, funny ..

01-05-2009, 06:24 PM	#1
Persius Tap into MOBILE! Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Hollywood Posts: 11,779	Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard! It couldn't be simpler! Check it out here

01-05-2009, 06:29 PM	#2
After Shock Media It's coming look busy Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn". Posts: 35,299	OK I am glad I did not just jump back here after watching a few moments of that to say how absolutely fucking stupid that is. Resisted the urge and did not show everyone that I do not rush to judgement. __________________ [email protected] ICQ:135982156 AIM: Aftershockmed1a MSN: [email protected]

01-05-2009, 06:33 PM	#4
MaDalton I am Amazing Content! Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 39,822	nice, i want one ;) __________________ AmazingContent.com - providing only the best content and service since 2003 Monetize your content on Veegaz.com - one of Germanies largest VOD sites Got German traffic? We convert it into money for you! Skype: madalton02826 - Email: oltecconsult [at] gmail [dot] com

01-05-2009, 06:35 PM	#5
~Ray visit hardlinks.org Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Las Vegas , Nv >>> [email protected] or icq 94994627 anytime Posts: 18,362	the onion __________________ Adult Backlinks for Adult Websites - Testimonials Available

01-05-2009, 06:41 PM	#6
dav3 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 7,348	"Everything is only a few hundred clicks away!" hahah __________________ Webmasters :: Juicy Ads :: ACWM :: Crak Revenue :: Money Tree

01-05-2009, 06:32 PM	#3
tony286 lurker Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: atlanta Posts: 57,021	that was too funny lol

01-05-2009, 06:44 PM	#7
hypedough Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Now running NATS4: HypeDough.com! Posts: 3,743	I want one! __________________ Ricky D :: Hype Dough President \| XBIZ.net \| ICQ 172-939-826 AIM+Skype HypeDough \| [NATS4] Kayden420: ['09 '10 '11 XBIZ Nominee \| Exclusive & HD] \| ThePornScout: [Exclusive + Reality \| Amateurs Want to Become Pornstars]

01-05-2009, 06:49 PM	#8
jmk Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 5,391	LOL you gotta love the onion!

01-05-2009, 06:53 PM	#9
Grapesoda So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Montana Posts: 46,238	fucking brilliant!

01-05-2009, 07:01 PM	#10
pornguy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Homeless Posts: 62,911	HP has had a touch screen out for 2 months., and we saw a reason the other day that its good to have a keyboard. A browser was opened and adjusted so that the X was off the top of the screen along with the top of the browser. There was no way to close it other then to reboot the system. No keyboard means no Ctrl Alt Del. __________________ PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic AmateurDough The Hottes Shemales online! TChicks.com \| Angeles Cid \| Mariana Cordoba \| MAILERS WELCOME!

01-05-2009, 07:01 PM	#11
TyroneGoldberg Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 1,081	love it.... lol

01-05-2009, 07:03 PM	#12
EthnicLover Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: S. California Posts: 1,584	"I'll buy almost anything if its shiny and made by Apple" "Where people use computers for actual work and not just dicking around." Hey I'm not dicking around. Bitch. __________________ Honest adult reviews? - Adult Reviews Ethnic paysite owners? - Get reviewed Follow me? - Twitter Porn

01-05-2009, 07:06 PM	#13
wyldblyss Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: The Buck Starts Here Posts: 5,779	"spent 45 minutes typing an email to a friend" lol

01-05-2009, 07:10 PM	#14
HorseShit Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 17,513	quite the production for something fake

01-05-2009, 07:10 PM	#15
Scroto Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2005 Posts: 2,804	epic failure lol..

01-05-2009, 07:13 PM	#16
abyss_al LOOKING FOR TRADES Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Southern California Posts: 15,605	__________________ EMAIL: allen @ vasmediagroup.com \| ICQ: 311329761 \| SKYPE: abyss.al \| AIM: xABYSSxALx

01-05-2009, 07:13 PM	#17
96ukssob So Fucking Banananananas Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: If I was in your ass you'd know it Posts: 12,991	that is great __________________ Email: Clicky on Me

01-05-2009, 07:36 PM	#19
bobby666 boots are my religion Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Heart of europe Posts: 21,765	really an impresive gadget __________________

01-05-2009, 07:58 PM	#20
NaughtyRob Two fresh affiliate progs Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Inside teen pussy Posts: 29,602	That shit is lame, I type like 65 wpm and that would slow me down BIGtime. __________________ [email protected] Skype: 17026955414 Vacares Web Hosting - Protect Your Ass with Included Daily Backups

01-05-2009, 08:06 PM	#21
J$tyle$ Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Sunny San Diego Posts: 11,500	Jobs: People who use keyboards 'Standing in the way of human progress' " ... virtually unbreakable unless dropped or hit" "... they are already hard at work on the next generation of the MacBook Wheel, which will be 4 oz lighter ... due to its lack of a screen, hard drive or wheel"

01-05-2009, 08:23 PM	#22
bronco67 Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 29,032	"Everything is just a few hundred clicks away" If you want a good laugh, read some of the "predicted sentences". I was laughing my ass off. __________________

01-05-2009, 08:26 PM	#23
Si Such Fun! Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 13,900	that is seriously fucked!

01-05-2009, 08:40 PM	#24
Dvae Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: US Posts: 5,326	An attempt at humor, but FAILED miserably!

01-05-2009, 08:52 PM	#25
Yngwie I am an Alien from space Industry Role: Join Date: May 2003 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 11,118	That's nothing. I invented a laptop with no keyboard or wheel. You just use the newly made Clapper to type, open files etc.. One clap = highlight file(s), 2 claps = open file(s) or folder(s). the alphabet clapping technique will take some practice, but after you have it mastered you will be typing at 1000wpm. There are many other features, but they will not be revealed till 3 moths prior to the launch which will be in 2053. What I can tell you is that it will have 256MB of edo ram, an insanely fast dx266 cpu, a large hdd totaling 10MB of space which you can use for anything and everything, TWO floppy drives, a 2400baud modem for super fast internet access and the list goes one.. The best part is the price.. It's will blow EVERYTHING out of the water and only cost $5500. How do we manage to sell for that low? We have made deals with the best hardware providers to give YOU what you need at a price you can afford. COMING SOON!

01-05-2009, 08:59 PM	#26
qxm Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: NoHo Posts: 5,970	wow...how stupid is that... I get the fact that anything Apple creates becomes a fashion accessory but ... fuck.. man... 45 mins to type an email... and I woudn't believe anyone who tells me the wheel is more efficient than the keyboard...no fucking way... If Apple plans to pull this shit out of their asses they better include an optional keyboard .. otherwise this is preposterous Twattlecock! .... BTW ... congratz to the winners (yeah .. stock owners!) __________________ ICQ: 266990876

01-05-2009, 09:29 PM	#29
tiger Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 6,986	Everything is just a few hundred clicks away. __________________

01-05-2009, 10:35 PM	#32
NinjaSteve Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 11,089	Hahaha, automatically says "Sent form a Macbook wheel" __________________ ...

01-06-2009, 01:31 AM	#33
grumpy Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Holland Posts: 9,870	the onion, always good __________________ Don't let greediness blur your vision \| You gotta let some shit slide icq - 441-456-888

01-06-2009, 01:41 AM	#34
Mr. E Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 453	hmmm, looks like that would take some getting used to and seems slow. I would love to see one you could just give voice commands to and one that typed what you said to it.

01-06-2009, 01:55 AM	#35
Adam X Now Giving 1 Fuck Daily Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: California Posts: 2,493	pretty lame.. I can type so fast.. why would I want to scroll for each letter, and it took that guy 45 minutes to type an email..... ridiculous __________________ Cronfund - Buy CRON now and earn 4% plus coin value. The best of DEFI!

01-06-2009, 02:21 AM	#37
Malicious Biz So Fucking Banned Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Put Shoe On Head Plz Posts: 4,575	"I'll buy anything as long as it's shiny and made by apple" Haha, I love The Onion.

01-06-2009, 02:29 AM	#39
Walter Gropius Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: UK Posts: 397	My favourite predicted sentence has to be: "The advertisement was effective." Brilliant! __________________ Adulterate \| Porn Legends \| Classic Porno \| Porn Blog ICQ: 433306197

01-06-2009, 02:54 AM	#40
Zorgman Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Sydney, Australia Posts: 6,103	Did they say the battery last for only 19 minutes? __________________ ---

01-06-2009, 03:34 AM	#41
germ ( o Y o ) Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 3,108	haha. i love the onion.

01-06-2009, 03:40 AM	#42
After Shock Media It's coming look busy Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn". Posts: 35,299	I love some of the replies here. __________________ [email protected] ICQ:135982156 AIM: Aftershockmed1a MSN: [email protected]