Smart cats...(joke) - GoFuckYourself.com

SilentKnight · 01-09-2009, 11:24 PM

Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.

The first man was an Engineer,
the second man was an Accountant,
the third man was a Chemist, and
the fourth man was a Government Employee.

To show off, the Engineer called his cat, 'T-square, do your stuff.'

T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle.

Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.

But the Accountant said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said,

'Spreadsheet, do your stuff.'

Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies.

Everyone agreed that was good.

But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, 'Measure, do your stuff.'

Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces into the glass without spilling a drop.

Everyone agreed that was pretty good.

Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, 'What can your cat do?'

The Government Employee called his cat and said, 'CoffeeBreak, do your stuff.'

CoffeeBreak jumped to his feet.......ate the cookies.......drank the milk......shit on the paper.......screwed the other three cats.......claimed he injured his back while doing so.......filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions.......put in for Workers Compensation...............and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave............

AND THAT, MY FRIEND IS WHY I WANT TO WORK FOR THE GOVERNMENT!!

Spunky · 01-09-2009, 11:27 PM

I heard the same joke but he was a Pakistani who just arrived in Canada

longbrick · 01-09-2009, 11:28 PM

True, True

SilentKnight · 01-09-2009, 11:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spunky

I heard the same joke but he was a Pakistani who just arrived in Canada

Yeah, but the cat version is closer to reality since they seem to understand English.

martinsc · 01-09-2009, 11:40 PM

Sweet Smile · 01-10-2009, 01:31 AM

haha, that's funny true

01-09-2009, 11:24 PM	#1
SilentKnight Megan Fox's fluffer Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: shooting pool in Elysium Posts: 24,818	Smart cats...(joke) Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were. The first man was an Engineer, the second man was an Accountant, the third man was a Chemist, and the fourth man was a Government Employee. To show off, the Engineer called his cat, 'T-square, do your stuff.' T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart. But the Accountant said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, 'Spreadsheet, do your stuff.' Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies. Everyone agreed that was good. But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, 'Measure, do your stuff.' Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces into the glass without spilling a drop. Everyone agreed that was pretty good. Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, 'What can your cat do?' The Government Employee called his cat and said, 'CoffeeBreak, do your stuff.' CoffeeBreak jumped to his feet.......ate the cookies.......drank the milk......shit on the paper.......screwed the other three cats.......claimed he injured his back while doing so.......filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions.......put in for Workers Compensation...............and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave............ AND THAT, MY FRIEND IS WHY I WANT TO WORK FOR THE GOVERNMENT!!

01-09-2009, 11:27 PM	#2
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,928	I heard the same joke but he was a Pakistani who just arrived in Canada __________________ CONTACT FOR YOUR INFORMATION HERE

01-09-2009, 11:28 PM	#3
longbrick Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Toronto Posts: 913	True, True __________________ Porn Site Reviews

01-09-2009, 11:40 PM	#5
martinsc Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: 127.0.0.1 Posts: 27,047	__________________ Make Money

01-10-2009, 01:31 AM	#6
Sweet Smile Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 455	haha, that's funny true __________________ ICQ: 306-812-749