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Old 12-26-2009, 12:10 AM   #1
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If Jesus Was On Earth Today

Here is a post from a war mongering hate spreading conservative cunt on a 'take back America For Jesus forum. The thread is entitled IF JESUS WAS ON EARTH TODAY. A better title would be IF JESUS WAS ON EARTH TODAY, HE'D BE A HATE MONGERING PRICK JUST LIKE ME. This retarded CUNT is on record as praying that God will unleash his wrath and kill liberals. He is always harping about getting his gun and taking Washington, DC by force, killing every sinner in his way.

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He would be an NRA member,
He would be pro life
He would be against the current health care bill
He would be against amnesty for illegals
He would say Rush and Sean are good guys
He would be against gay marriage and gay rights
He would chastise the current government(both parties) for trampling the Constitution.
He would shut down the porn industry and clean up Hollywood
He would treat our seniors and veterans better.
He would be in favor of American Revolution II.
He would hate the evil Obama but love the man,
He would be against US imperialism around the world and encourage charity instead,
HE WOULD BE A CONSERVATIVE!!!
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Old 12-26-2009, 03:12 AM   #2
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bump for jesus
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Old 12-26-2009, 03:54 AM   #3
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He would be coo coo for cocoa puffs.
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Old 12-26-2009, 04:03 AM   #4
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He would say, "I love you", "Though shalt not kill" and "Blessed are the peacemakers."
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Old 12-26-2009, 04:43 AM   #5
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He would probably want to hit up Burger King for a flame broiled Whopper, and then snort a few lines off a hookers ass.
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Old 12-26-2009, 04:54 AM   #6
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Old 12-26-2009, 04:58 AM   #7
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practically everyone would take a stab at him and verbally abuse him, nobody would offer him any kind of assistance or means to some peace and quiet and time on his own.

the Bible says (hehe I've never written that before)... the bible says to SEARCH FOR GOD.

How come I've been posting dozens of times on the internet "I am God" and not one Christian had the brains to search for that phrase on Google?

What the frick is the Pope doing? Wasn't the pope-hood handed down over hundreds of years to keep an eye out for Jesus' second coming, to hand over religion to the next son of God. To give him a iron sealed chapel to evade the anti-christ american secret service that records the son of God's every movement.

Pope's a fuckwad, not a religious bone in the cunt, not a single religious person on the planet. fucking hypocrites serve a dead man, how easy is it, yes Jesus I'll do anything for you.... fucking hard that.

When a movie comes out called THE TRUE-SHOW and it's about a single man being constantly monitored, and his initials are JC you grow a fucking brain and work it out.
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Old 12-26-2009, 05:15 AM   #8
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Originally Posted by cam_girls View Post
practically everyone would take a stab at him and verbally abuse him, nobody would offer him any kind of assistance or means to some peace and quiet and time on his own.

the Bible says (hehe I've never written that before)... the bible says to SEARCH FOR GOD.

How come I've been posting dozens of times on the internet "I am God" and not one Christian had the brains to search for that phrase on Google?

What the frick is the Pope doing? Wasn't the pope-hood handed down over hundreds of years to keep an eye out for Jesus' second coming, to hand over religion to the next son of God. To give him a iron sealed chapel to evade the anti-christ american secret service that records the son of God's every movement.

Pope's a fuckwad, not a religious bone in the cunt, not a single religious person on the planet. fucking hypocrites serve a dead man, how easy is it, yes Jesus I'll do anything for you.... fucking hard that.

When a movie comes out called THE TRUE-SHOW and it's about a single man being constantly monitored, and his initials are JC you grow a fucking brain and work it out.
Lay off the eggnog
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Old 12-26-2009, 05:25 AM   #9
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It's a crazy world today. There is the existence of friendly terrorists that actually constantly spy on people and help the people being terrorized. Other terrorists are not so friendly.

But, you know what George Bush says, "America has to use terror to fight terror."
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Old 12-26-2009, 05:36 AM   #10
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If Jesus live today he will just give up
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Old 12-26-2009, 05:38 AM   #11
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Jesus is already on earth.... I have talked to him like 10 times in Vegas, couple times in LA, once in NYC, the guy has been doing this for like 2000 years now, he really gets around.
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Old 12-26-2009, 06:05 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cam_girls View Post
...........

What the frick is the Pope doing? Wasn't the pope-hood handed down over hundreds of years to keep an eye out for Jesus' second coming, to hand over religion to the next son of God. To give him a iron sealed chapel to evade the anti-christ american secret service that records the son of God's every movement.
The pope thing is a farce.. and they are all headed for Hell in a handbag..
Nothing in the bible gave any pope such powers as he thinks he has..
God said not to teach outside of the bible.. the pope teaches canon law.. and changes it when he feels like it.. big no-no..
One huge political power/money grab..
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Old 12-26-2009, 07:25 AM   #13
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He will be to old, he will be 2010 years old... xaxaaaa...
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Old 12-26-2009, 08:57 AM   #14
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Here is a reply by the same guy to the same thread, fucked up spelling and all. He claims that liberals are pro-beastiality. These people are fucking unbelievable.

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The second cominf of Christ he will be THE ANGRY MAN as porttrayed in Revelations. The good will koin his army and the bad he will send spinning into hell. Liberals have a knack of violating his commandments and justifying doing so:
Abortion
Sodomy
Porn
Immorality of all kinds
Beastiality
Murder
Sloth(illegals and welfare recioients)

I could go on and on. Liberals FAVOR allowing these activities to take place!
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Old 12-26-2009, 09:14 AM   #15
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you can add "He would run a cam site."
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Old 12-26-2009, 09:33 AM   #16
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Another from the same poster. I know it is easy to mock and ridicule these people but there are a whole lot of them and they vote. This is a SERIOUS cancer on society.

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This stuff happens due to our lienent court system. rapists should be given the death penalty! Who says these preditors are usually white christian men? The lefty media? A large percentage are most likely gays. The line about blacks and computers is just NOT TRUE!!!
If you are liberal, this cunt thinks you must be gay.

Can someone please explain these people to me? The Jesus I read about in the NT is NOTHING like this, but this is a TYPICAL extremest Christian viewpoint. What is wrong with these people?
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Old 12-26-2009, 09:33 AM   #17
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you can add "He would run a cam site."
Attempt at humor = FAIL
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Old 12-26-2009, 09:45 AM   #18
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Jesus would definitely be running a tube site and try to take Brazzers down.
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Old 12-26-2009, 09:47 AM   #19
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What do you think his opinion of the McRib would be?
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