HELP! I need a cover website FAST. Family is visiting and they want to see what I do
 

I'm so fucked. My family is visiting me and my sister is out of work. They want to see what I do tonight. I told them I do web design and work on an intranet for a company. Making shit up as I go.

Is there any mainstream website where I can log into to make it look like I work there?
I'll pay any fee to join anything so it can look like I work on it.

My family isn't technical but I want to show something believable.
I'm so fucked help!!!

Tell them you mostly do consulting and are not allowed to share with others final product.

How old are you?

how long have you known about this visit? you're waiting until just hours before they arrive to ask gfyers.

don't get me wrong, i love this thread already.

Show your porn site and say that you designed it for your customer. Or some of those.

Or why to show anything; just tell what you do. "Blaadi blaa.. good interface, user friendly, conversion.. blaa..blaa. Just don't tell that it is user friendly porn site with good interface.

Lol I'm 32. My main site is a gay hookup site with dicks and cumshots everywhere lol
Doesn't really matter how old I am I don't want family seeing it.

They never asked too SEE it in the past so was always able to give a blowoff answer but now they want to SEE it. Just sprang it on me

Ilol pay anything to join anything as a front to show them something believable

lol



.

You're on Online Project Manager

https://basecamp.com/

Do you need cover-up girlfriend too? :) LOL

Go to random mainstream website download a copy of the site, toss it into a few tools that you use and call it your current project... Or just tell them you work in adult...

Copy a site

Change the information and add yourself as director on the "about us" page

Host it on your own server

buy a domain for it

when they leave, take it down

Put some Sudafed, battery acid, drain cleaner, lantern fuel and antifreeze on the corner of your kitchen counter.

When questioned just laugh and say "Kidding, I make gay porn" They'll pat you on the back and take you out to dinner.

That's a good one. I can tell them I'm a contractor for my main client an energy company and not allowed to show it because the company will see I logged in when I was supposed to be away and didn't do any work and question me.
Good one thanks

And I have some small shit ones mainstream personals I can show as small stuff

Whats the problem with it?

1. gay hookup site?
2. cumshots (without females)?
3. you might be gay and they don't know?
4. Anything else...

:thumbsup

I don't have anything in english...
Say that u own a hosting company lolz and give them some url/page to see... dunno :Oh crap

Just open some html/php files inside Notepad++, six or seven tabs, then say you are working on that intranet.

It will look impossibly complicated to them.

Take the files from something like the latest wordpress :2 cents:

No they know im gay I dont care, they met my boyfriend and I live in the gay hood. I just do t want then to know I work in porn

There you go perfect, plus it will look impossible for your unemployed sister to hint at help getting her a job.

hwhehehhehe

Yup exactly what I'm planning to do thank you
But I was hoping to have something I could show of the front end but this'll have to do

:thumbsup

Can't help you out :(

I can lunch a vps at DigitalOcean give u access to it...
u can put some shits running on the screen and u say that u manage a server for some company ....

http://i.imgur.com/i1yvT48.gif

when they start to ask to may questions can say to them "are we here to have fun or talk about work? i'm no drug or arm dealer!"

Fucking brilliant thank you

I have some tech review blogs that I basically abandoned. I could set a a wordpress user account for you. maybe post a few new product reviews?

[QUOTE=MrGusMuller;20442868]:thumbsup

Can't help you out :(

I can give u access to a server...
u can put some shits running on the screen and u say that u manage a server for some company ....

http://i.imgur.com/i1yvT48.gif

/QUOTE]

Lollz that's exactly what I want. Just confuse the shit out of them and Theyll never ask again.

Is there a free c++ or vb compiler and vb program I can download to show that? And I can be looking like "look I'm adding a button to this interface. Or something

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

Yes! Perfect. I'm good witheordpress how do i contact you? I'll paupalyou for this. And only use it for 5 minutes. I won't touch anything just show them to confuse them

Grrr on my phone and keeps autocorrecting

post a photo of your sister I might have work for her

I know right FML

shoot me an email
[email protected]

Sent. You rock. I'll PayPal you after

Just show them Facebook - tell them you'll be sitting pretty when you cash in your options.

I showed them GFY and now they think I work on a funky online newspaper ...

you a grown ass man :1orglaugh Gomer Pyle account hacked :2 cents:

Pretty sad when you have to lie to your family.. be a fucking man.

Told and showed my parents what I do for a living once. They never asked me after how's work or what's new with my job. One time was enough :D.

You do understand that they're asking to see your work either because they already suspect what you really do or someone told them, right? Just tell the truth. "Look, I haven't already sent you the link to my website because it's a gay dating site, and people post adult images of themselves on it. Although it's really popular in the community and provides a nice income for me, I figured it would make you uncomfortable to browse through." You'll feel so much better if you're honest.

just install ubuntu on your PC and open the terminal and run command line bullshit
and tell then you are setting up a web server for a client.

Run "sudo apt-get update" and then "sudo apt-get upgrade"
that will blow them away.

if that's not enough then just keep doing "yum installs" that are already installed.


:1orglaugh

just download some free wordpress themes and have them open for editing

i had a feeling this thread would be chocked full of much killarity!

Download a trial copy of Sublime Text and fill a few tabs with a ton of code (grab off pastebin). Maximize it and leave it on your screen. When asked, start explaining the code to them. Make shit up as you go along. They'll lose interest within 15 seconds.

If they still ask what it looks like on a computer, make them feel dumb by saying "it is the code that runs the backend, there is nothing to 'see.'" Be sure to mock them. They'll feel really dumb and give up.

Make it sound complicated and make them feel dumb.

Mikesouths comment is the reason why i dont want my family to know I work in porn, cuz of the jaded industry people who say shit like that.