This is how you write an ad, anybody want to buy a Harley? - GoFuckYourself.com

MK Ultra · 05-21-2014, 08:44 AM

http://slo.craigslist.org/mcy/4480512421.html

Quote:

OK, let me start off by saying this Harley Davidson is only available for purchase by the manliest of men (or women). My friend, if it was possible for a vehicle to sprout chest hair and a five o'clock shadow, this bike would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly.

It was never intended to drive to the mall so you can pick up that adorable shirt at Abercrombie & Fitch that you had your eye on. It wasn't meant to transport you to yoga class or Linens & Things. No, that's what your Prius is for. If that's the kind of vehicle you're looking for, then just do us all a favor and stop reading right now. I mean it. Just stop.

THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR A MAN WHO: does not own a toolbox, has never changed their own oil, and are scared of firearms.
THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR A MAN WHO: has been posting on facebook all about how excited you are for pumpkin latte season.
THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR A MAN WHO: gets offended easy and often, whine to your co-workers, and uses coconut hand lotion every morning.
THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR A MAN WHO: has never uttered the words, "Hold my beer and watch this ..."
THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR A MAN WHO: owns a bieber album, white oakleys, affliction t-shirts, or those candy-assed stitched-pocket jeans.
THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR A MAN WHO: considers the 2nd Amendment an anachronistic relic and have never owned a firearm.

This bike was engineered by Army Ranger Navy Seal super-warriors to serve the needs of the man that cheats death on a daily basis. They didn't even consider superfluous nancy boy amenities like navigation systems (real men don't get lost), heated leather seats (a real man doesn't let anything warm his butt), or On Star (real men don't even know what the hell On Star is). No, this brute comes with the things us testosterone-fueled super action junkies need. It has a massive engine to outrun the cops. It's got special blood/gore resistant upholstery. It even has a first-aid kit in the back. You know what the first aid kit has in it? A pint of whiskey, a stitch-your-own-wound kit and a hunk of leather to bite down on when you're operating on yourself.

It has room for you and a hotty you picked up on the way to the gym to blast your pecs and hammer your glutes. There's only 12,800 miles on this two-wheeled hellcat from Planet Kickass. Trust me, it will outlive you and the offspring that will carry your name. It will live on as a monument to your machismo.

You like going fast? Ever tried to outrun 24 police cars and 3 helicopters? You need this a bike. Its like someone took a rocket and opened its mouth and poured steroids down its throat and and threatened to kill its family if it wasn't the fastest motherfcker you've ever rode.

Now, go look in the mirror and tell me what you see. If it's a rugged, no holds barred, super brute he-man macho Chuck Norris stunt double, then contact me.

Horny Dude · 05-21-2014, 08:48 AM

That is going to get some attention. Dude must be a copywriter.

dyna mo · 05-21-2014, 08:52 AM

hah, those sportster riders sure need to build up the tall tales about sportsters. and to justify a 10k asking price for a 6 year old sportie!

Tom_PM · 05-21-2014, 08:54 AM

TL;DR does not a good ad make. He should have added at the end that if you were still reading then you are too much of an egg head for a Harley.

seeandsee · 05-21-2014, 09:00 AM

And i never had one

TCLGirls · 05-21-2014, 09:05 AM

He forgot to say:

THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR A MAN WHO: lives in San Luis Obispo, AKA: Hippy Haven of Central California

L-Pink · 05-21-2014, 09:19 AM

If he'll take $4,500 I'll have it painted pink and get it for my girlfriend. She's always wanted a sportster.

dyna mo · 05-21-2014, 09:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by L-Pink

If he'll take $4,500 I'll have it painted pink and get it for my girlfriend. She's always wanted a sportster.

she might want to get a stage 2 kit for it, so it will have some actual energy created from the motor.

PR_Glen · 05-21-2014, 09:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by L-Pink

If he'll take $4,500 I'll have it painted pink and get it for my girlfriend. She's always wanted a sportster.

i see sportsters going for that price pretty often. Why are they so much cheaper? I kind of like the idea of them being a lighter bike. I have zero interest in riding a couch on wheels myself.

L-Pink · 05-21-2014, 09:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PR_Glen

i see sportsters going for that price pretty often. Why are they so much cheaper? I kind of like the idea of them being a lighter bike. I have zero interest in riding a couch on wheels myself.

Here's the exact copy from craigs list for a black fatboy of the same year ?...

condition: like new

2008 Haley Davidson Fatboy - Like New!! Price reduced to $11,000

NEW REDUCED PRICE!!

96 cubic inch - 1584 cc
2,600 miles - Black & Chrome beauty
Perfect condition, garage kept under cover
Detachable windshield and backrest
Vance & Hines pipes & many upgrades

http://sarasota.craigslist.org/mcy/4467127696.html

.

Vendzilla · 05-21-2014, 09:38 AM

1200 sporty's are pretty fast, but not worth all that. The one I had was in better condition and I got it for 5k.
Now that I'm riding a full sized road king, I want a little more off the line power so I'm getting a cam kit, it will make a huge difference. I ride almost every day.

If you spend more than 5k for a sporty, it better have gold plating somewhere

Vendzilla · 05-21-2014, 09:46 AM

LOL, just realized I got my road king with less miles on it for less and I have a $500 lePara seat on mine

Tom-LifeSelector · 05-21-2014, 09:48 AM

Nice marketing text unfortunately

I am too tall for this bike

scuba steve · 05-21-2014, 09:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by L-Pink

Here's the exact copy from craigs list for a black fatboy of the same year ?...

condition: like new

2008 Haley Davidson Fatboy - Like New!! Price reduced to $11,000

NEW REDUCED PRICE!!

96 cubic inch - 1584 cc
2,600 miles - Black & Chrome beauty
Perfect condition, garage kept under cover
Detachable windshield and backrest
Vance & Hines pipes & many upgrades

http://sarasota.craigslist.org/mcy/4467127696.html

.

fatboy much more bike than a sportster. fun bikes, but not exactly the manly rocket he's bragging about

Fat Panda · 05-21-2014, 09:50 AM

a sportster. ha what a fucking loser

JustDaveXxx · 05-21-2014, 09:53 AM

Funny add. lol

Just Dave

dyna mo · 05-21-2014, 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by scuba steve

fatboy much more bike than a sportster. fun bikes, but not exactly the manly rocket he's bragging about

to be fair, the sportster he's bragging about is not a manly rocket.

L-Pink · 05-21-2014, 09:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tom-LifeSelector

Nice marketing text unfortunately

I am too tall for this bike

With rider weight a Sportster seat height is taller than a Fatboy/Wide Glide, same as a Roadking and 1/2 inch shorter than a full dresser.

I've gone thru this drill before when friends want to get a sportster for their girlfriends. The weight factor is the only real difference, not height.

.

PR_Glen · 05-21-2014, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dyna mo

to be fair, the sportster he's bragging about is not a manly rocket.

since when does the bike make the man? plenty of pussies on big bikes too.

dyna mo · 05-21-2014, 11:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PR_Glen

since when does the bike make the man? plenty of pussies on big bikes too.

I didn't say that. You said he was bragging about a manly rocket, and he was. But that sportster isn't manly and it isn't a rocket. Now some can be made to be and I almost took on that project after my dyna project.

but it's a tall order, to wit:

there are plenty of examples of rocketship sportsters, but they are very trick and that one in that craigslist ad is not one of them. That bike in the op is built from the shelves of the harley accessories dept.

This is another example of a rocket sportie and very similar to one my bro built and rode when I rode my dyna with him

scuba steve · 05-21-2014, 12:07 PM

hm think you misread my post. i was saying the sportster is not the manly rocket he was claiming. i've had one. its fun, great ride, but not the rocket he says it is

ContentPimp · 05-21-2014, 01:15 PM

Nice one.. copyscape it to reveal it was used many times for many other bikes

Dead · 05-21-2014, 04:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dyna mo

I didn't say that. You said he was bragging about a manly rocket, and he was. But that sportster isn't manly and it isn't a rocket. Now some can be made to be and I almost took on that project after my dyna project.

but it's a tall order, to wit:

there are plenty of examples of rocketship sportsters, but they are very trick and that one in that craigslist ad is not one of them. That bike in the op is built from the shelves of the harley accessories dept.

This is another example of a rocket sportie and very similar to one my bro built and rode when I rode my dyna with him

Stabilizer tied to the rod tube? I have never seen this..
Nice build, picking it apart is all

MK Ultra · 05-21-2014, 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dyna mo

hah, those sportster riders sure need to build up the tall tales about sportsters. and to justify a 10k asking price for a 6 year old sportie!

You gotta admire the chutzpah of a guy asking $10000 for a $6500 Sportster.
Unless he's one of those Harley owners who has what he's got invested in it confused with what's it's actually worth.

Quote:

Originally Posted by TCLGirls

He forgot to say:

THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR A MAN WHO: lives in San Luis Obispo, AKA: Hippy Haven of Central California

I occasionally amuse myself by riding over to SLO and going up Marsh Street and down Higuera setting off car alarms with my pipes and causing all the hippie liberals on the sidewalks to cover their ears and flee shrieking to the shelter of their Safe Place. (The Apple Store)

Quote:

Originally Posted by PR_Glen

i see sportsters going for that price pretty often. Why are they so much cheaper? I kind of like the idea of them being a lighter bike. I have zero interest in riding a couch on wheels myself.

Sportster is a smaller, lighter less horsepower bike with a corresponding lower retail price, fewer are sold new and they are seen as a less-desirable used machine.
Seen by many (not me of course) as a "chick's" Harley.

How tall are you? If you are over 5'7" I wouldn't consider getting a Sportster, it will soon seem too small.
Ask Vendzilla, he had a one for a while, he very soon traded it off on a bigger bike.

You go out for a full day of riding and you get to about 300 miles covered you might just rethink that "couch on wheels" comment.

Like you I didn't want the full "Geezer Glide" and everybody on a Harley these days seem to be on Road Kings or Road Glides or Street Glides, I wanted to go a bit lighter, more nimble so I went with a Dyna, same motor as the bigger bikes but a couple hundred pounds lighter. Which makes it easy for me to outrun most other Harley riders I meet on the road.

But, it's not a great bike for long-distance touring, I'm thinking about getting a second bike for multi-day trips.

upforit_sarah · 05-21-2014, 04:32 PM

Ohhhh, a girly bike, just for me. LOL

05-21-2014, 08:48 AM	#2
Horny Dude Earn enough to buy coffee Industry Role: Join Date: May 2002 Location: San Diego, Ca. Posts: 4,912	That is going to get some attention. Dude must be a copywriter. __________________

05-21-2014, 08:54 AM	#4
Tom_PM Porn Meister Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 16,443	TL;DR does not a good ad make. He should have added at the end that if you were still reading then you are too much of an egg head for a Harley. __________________ 43-922-863 Shut up and play your guitar.

05-21-2014, 09:00 AM	#5
seeandsee Check SIG! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Europe (Skype: gojkoas) Posts: 50,945	And i never had one __________________ BUY MY SIG - 50$/Year Contact here

05-21-2014, 09:38 AM	#11
Vendzilla Biker Gnome Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: cell#324 Posts: 23,200	1200 sporty's are pretty fast, but not worth all that. The one I had was in better condition and I got it for 5k. Now that I'm riding a full sized road king, I want a little more off the line power so I'm getting a cam kit, it will make a huge difference. I ride almost every day. If you spend more than 5k for a sporty, it better have gold plating somewhere __________________ Webair died? Carbon is not the problem, it makes up 0.041% of our atmosphere , 95% of that is from Volcanos and decomposing plants and stuff. So people in the US are responsible for 13% of the carbon in the atmosphere which 95% is not from Humans, like cars and trucks and stuff and they want to spend trillions to fix it while Solar Panel plants are powered by coal plants think about that

05-21-2014, 09:46 AM	#12
Vendzilla Biker Gnome Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: cell#324 Posts: 23,200	LOL, just realized I got my road king with less miles on it for less and I have a $500 lePara seat on mine __________________ Webair died? Carbon is not the problem, it makes up 0.041% of our atmosphere , 95% of that is from Volcanos and decomposing plants and stuff. So people in the US are responsible for 13% of the carbon in the atmosphere which 95% is not from Humans, like cars and trucks and stuff and they want to spend trillions to fix it while Solar Panel plants are powered by coal plants think about that

05-21-2014, 08:52 AM	#3
dyna mo The People's Post Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: invisible 7-11 Posts: 65,340	hah, those sportster riders sure need to build up the tall tales about sportsters. and to justify a 10k asking price for a 6 year old sportie!

05-21-2014, 09:05 AM	#6
TCLGirls Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: California Posts: 3,068	He forgot to say: THIS VEHICLE IS NOT FOR A MAN WHO: lives in San Luis Obispo, AKA: Hippy Haven of Central California

05-21-2014, 09:19 AM	#7
L-Pink working on my tan Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Florida/Kentucky Posts: 39,151	If he'll take $4,500 I'll have it painted pink and get it for my girlfriend. She's always wanted a sportster.

05-21-2014, 09:48 AM	#13
Tom-LifeSelector Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2013 Posts: 767	Nice marketing text unfortunately I am too tall for this bike __________________ LifeSelector Affiliates - Make money today promoting the online porn of tomorrow. tom [at] lifeselector.com skype: tom-ia icq: 684001976

05-21-2014, 09:50 AM	#15
Fat Panda Porn is Dead. Move along. Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 13,295	a sportster. ha what a fucking loser

05-21-2014, 09:53 AM	#16
JustDaveXxx I AM JUSTDAVE ! Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: LA Posts: 4,111	Funny add. lol Just Dave __________________ Smut Peddler Productions.com ICQ #378-696-435 / / Skype: JustDaveXxx "We shoot custom, exclusive content your way"

05-21-2014, 12:07 PM	#21
scuba steve Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: i'm in miami bitch Posts: 1,888	hm think you misread my post. i was saying the sportster is not the manly rocket he was claiming. i've had one. its fun, great ride, but not the rocket he says it is __________________

05-21-2014, 01:15 PM	#22
ContentPimp Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 3,184	Nice one.. copyscape it to reveal it was used many times for many other bikes __________________ Blog Post Writing and Reviews are 2 cents per word & Titles and Gallery Descriptions 1 cent per word We also write Pay Site Reviews, SEO and Mainstream text www.contentpimp.info Contact me on ICQ at 400792466 Payoneer, Paxum and Paypal Accepted forms of Payment by the Pimp

05-21-2014, 04:32 PM	#25
upforit_sarah Registered User Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2014 Location: Sunny California Posts: 65	Ohhhh, a girly bike, just for me. LOL