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Old 03-12-2019, 07:09 AM   #1
CurrentlySober
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Best place to hide a turd in someone's new house?

OK, so long story short, there's this local asshole who I went to school with. Used to be a total bully and no one liked him. Didn't achieve anything for himself after leaving school. Stayed on government benefits and spent most of life just causing other people trouble. Fast forward to late last year and his parents died and left him a substantial inheritance. So he's bought a place locally and invited everyone he can remember the name of, to come over for a 'party' and to see 'How well he has done for himself..'

He really isn't being nice in throwing the party. He just wants to lord up how much money he now has, through no achievement of his own, other than being the fastest sperm out of his father's ball-sack... So, I've decided to attend, and think it would be cool revenge to "drop a deuce", and then hide it somewhere in his house.... But where? The bed would be too obvious, and if I put it somewhere too remote, he may never find it. I want him to come across it, within the next day or so, and think - Fuck ! Who left that there? They must really dislike me...

So what do you reckon guys? Where is a good location for me to leave his 'gift' ?
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Old 03-12-2019, 07:20 AM   #2
Colmike9
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In his dryer or dishwasher
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Old 03-12-2019, 07:20 AM   #3
Bladewire
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Put it in his electrical box. The next time he has to go reset a fuse he'll open it up and see shit everywhere it'll be hard to get out of the crevices of each of the switches That a long term stealth one.

If you want a quick instant gratification you could do the oldie but goodie called the upper decker or you can leave a present under the pillow on his bed or you could leave some under the driver side door door handles on his car
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Old 03-12-2019, 07:21 AM   #4
alexistexasass
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:tongue

Closet
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Old 03-12-2019, 07:22 AM   #5
OneHungLo
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easiest, most inconspicuous place would be to drop an upper decker. That is an actual photo of me doing it.
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Old 03-12-2019, 07:30 AM   #6
PiffStenis
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In the bottom of a box of cereal
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Old 03-12-2019, 07:35 AM   #7
redwhiteandblue
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Airing cupboard.
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Old 03-12-2019, 07:41 AM   #8
blackmonsters
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If you want to make sure he never finds it then hide it in a book.

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Old 03-12-2019, 07:50 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PiffStenis View Post
In the bottom of a box of cereal
OOOOOooooh!
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Old 03-12-2019, 08:17 AM   #10
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Group of people I knew went on holiday, coming back and getting the photos developed (pre digital) first photo out the camera, so taken on day 1 was a close up arsehole shot with the guys toothbrush sticking out of it.

Maybe recreate that.

Or leave a shit in the airing cupboard. will take a day or so to really stink.
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Old 03-12-2019, 08:31 AM   #11
The Truth Hurts
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be a grown up, and stay home.
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Old 03-12-2019, 08:36 AM   #12
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Here's another one put a pile of shit in air conditioning duct
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Old 03-12-2019, 08:40 AM   #13
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easiest, most inconspicuous place would be to drop an upper decker. That is an actual photo of me doing it.
I believe you, because I see you metaphorically do that to gfy daily.
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Old 03-12-2019, 08:51 AM   #14
escorpio
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In a shoe.
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Old 03-12-2019, 08:55 AM   #15
OneHungLo
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Originally Posted by Dead Eye View Post
I believe you, because I see you metaphorically do that to gfy daily.
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Old 03-12-2019, 08:57 AM   #16
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Hide it inside a fair-sized pet's rectum . . .
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Old 03-12-2019, 09:11 AM   #17
Busty2
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Open up a central heating duct grill and slide it in there!

My ex was pissed with someone in San Diego and slide a frozen chicken under their bed, apparently after a week they had to move out of their apartment as the smell got so bad
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Old 03-12-2019, 05:50 PM   #18
Mr Pheer
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Nothing beats a shrimp in the air vent. Works in houses, cars, Army vehicles, aircraft, etc.
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