Joke I just heard....funny shit - GoFuckYourself.com

Snake Doctor · 04-14-2005, 01:02 AM

An elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary. The old man leans forward and says softly to his wife, "Dear, there is something that I must ask you. It has always bothered me that our 10th child never quite looked like the rest of our children. Now I want to assure you that these 75 years have been the most wonderful experience I could have ever hoped for, and your answer cannot take all that away. But, I must know: did he have a different father?"

The wife drops her head, unable to look her husband in the eye. She pauses for a moment and then confesses, "Yes, yes he did."

The old man is shaken; the reality of what his wife admitted hit him harder than he had expected. With a tear in his eye he asks, "Who? Who was he? Who was the father?"

Again the old woman drops her head, saying nothing at first as she tries to muster the courage to tell the truth to her husband. Then, finally, she says, "You."

foxylady · 04-14-2005, 01:04 AM

lol

JFPdude · 04-14-2005, 01:07 AM

Elli · 04-14-2005, 01:27 AM

ohhhh that's awful

Homer · 04-14-2005, 01:32 AM

nice joke

wargames · 04-14-2005, 01:38 AM

Funny shit.

Marcus Aurelius · 04-14-2005, 01:43 AM

It's like the old couple who celebrated their 70th wedding anniversary by having breakfast in the nude, just like our honeymoon the old woman says to her naked husband across the table from her "you know dear, after 70 years, you still make my nipples all warm and tingly" the old man lovingly replies gently...

"they are in your oatmeal".

Morgan · 04-14-2005, 01:47 AM

ummm... how sad.

i just was reunited with my brother of 38 years today.

lol, but serious. no joke. see other thread.

chaze · 04-14-2005, 01:54 AM

Those are both good, too bad I never remember the good jokes just the lame ones like:

this guy walked into a bar and says ouch.

I know pathetic.

Marcus Aurelius · 04-14-2005, 01:58 AM

an old man starts having health problems so his wife takes him for a checkup. after a ton of bloodowork and tests the doctors are on the phone with her a week later, "mam, we are confused as to your husbands condition..we think he either has alzheimers or the early stages of aids, his blood work up was just too inconclusive we will have to do a few tests"

This is horrible the woman says, I know it wouldnt seem it for our age but we are still sexually active, what should I do if he makes a move on me?!

Well mam, my best advice the doctor replies, get him in the car, drive about a mile from your house, and put him out.

If he comes home..dont fuck him!

beta-tester · 04-14-2005, 02:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lenny2

An elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary. The old man leans forward and says softly to his wife, "Dear, there is something that I must ask you. It has always bothered me that our 10th child never quite looked like the rest of our children. Now I want to assure you that these 75 years have been the most wonderful experience I could have ever hoped for, and your answer cannot take all that away. But, I must know: did he have a different father?"

The wife drops her head, unable to look her husband in the eye. She pauses for a moment and then confesses, "Yes, yes he did."

The old man is shaken; the reality of what his wife admitted hit him harder than he had expected. With a tear in his eye he asks, "Who? Who was he? Who was the father?"

Again the old woman drops her head, saying nothing at first as she tries to muster the courage to tell the truth to her husband. Then, finally, she says, "You."

ROFL

Damn man, that was really funny one

Vitasoy · 04-14-2005, 02:20 AM

haha damn that made my day.

Wolfy · 04-14-2005, 03:51 AM

Two old men were siting around and one had just celebrated his 60th anniversary with his wife. The old man was trying to tel the other all the thngs they did the night before, but was having a hard time with his alzheimers. He tells his crotchety friend, "We had a spectacular evening! Shrimp and steak and a bottle of wine, which at our age is an incredible feat, as you know!" To which his friend inquires, "Where did you go to eat?"
The old man scratches his head and ponders a moment. His eyes squint as he tries to recall. He asks his friend, "What's the name of that flower? It's red, has thorns..."
"Rose?"
"Yeah!" Then he hollers to the kitchen, "ROSE, HONEY! What's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"

imafuckingaussie · 04-14-2005, 03:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mdcq

It's like the old couple who celebrated their 70th wedding anniversary by having breakfast in the nude, just like our honeymoon the old woman says to her naked husband across the table from her "you know dear, after 70 years, you still make my nipples all warm and tingly" the old man lovingly replies gently...

"they are in your oatmeal".

LMAO, even funnier then the thread starter joke

webcrawler · 04-14-2005, 06:01 AM

a good one.

margarita · 04-14-2005, 06:05 AM

Ron-AWE · 04-14-2005, 06:22 AM

That was a good one !

Spunky · 04-14-2005, 06:26 AM

Har har..that gave me a chuckle

04-14-2005, 01:02 AM	#1
Snake Doctor I'm Lenny2 Bitch Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: On top of my soapbox Posts: 13,449	Joke I just heard....funny shit An elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary. The old man leans forward and says softly to his wife, "Dear, there is something that I must ask you. It has always bothered me that our 10th child never quite looked like the rest of our children. Now I want to assure you that these 75 years have been the most wonderful experience I could have ever hoped for, and your answer cannot take all that away. But, I must know: did he have a different father?" The wife drops her head, unable to look her husband in the eye. She pauses for a moment and then confesses, "Yes, yes he did." The old man is shaken; the reality of what his wife admitted hit him harder than he had expected. With a tear in his eye he asks, "Who? Who was he? Who was the father?" Again the old woman drops her head, saying nothing at first as she tries to muster the courage to tell the truth to her husband. Then, finally, she says, "You." __________________ sig too big

04-14-2005, 01:04 AM	#2
foxylady Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 1,829	lol __________________

04-14-2005, 01:27 AM	#4
Elli Reach for those stars! Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Vancouver, BC Posts: 17,991	ohhhh that's awful __________________ email: [email protected]

04-14-2005, 01:32 AM	#5
Homer Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 6,780	nice joke __________________

04-14-2005, 01:38 AM	#6
wargames Kliris Join Date: May 2003 Location: ca Posts: 10,423	Funny shit. __________________ ICQ 212-115-582 Email Steve at Vas Media Group .com

04-14-2005, 01:07 AM	#3
JFPdude Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Mountains of Western North Carolina. Posts: 4,027

04-14-2005, 01:43 AM	#7
Marcus Aurelius No Refunds Issued. Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2003 Posts: 14,809	It's like the old couple who celebrated their 70th wedding anniversary by having breakfast in the nude, just like our honeymoon the old woman says to her naked husband across the table from her "you know dear, after 70 years, you still make my nipples all warm and tingly" the old man lovingly replies gently... "they are in your oatmeal".

04-14-2005, 01:47 AM	#8
Morgan Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: May 2002 Location: Corona Del Mar, CA Posts: 10,520	ummm... how sad. i just was reunited with my brother of 38 years today. lol, but serious. no joke. see other thread. __________________ PornstarPlatinum.com \| TransErotica.com

04-14-2005, 01:54 AM	#9
chaze Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 9,752	Those are both good, too bad I never remember the good jokes just the lame ones like: this guy walked into a bar and says ouch. I know pathetic.

04-14-2005, 01:58 AM	#10
Marcus Aurelius No Refunds Issued. Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2003 Posts: 14,809	an old man starts having health problems so his wife takes him for a checkup. after a ton of bloodowork and tests the doctors are on the phone with her a week later, "mam, we are confused as to your husbands condition..we think he either has alzheimers or the early stages of aids, his blood work up was just too inconclusive we will have to do a few tests" This is horrible the woman says, I know it wouldnt seem it for our age but we are still sexually active, what should I do if he makes a move on me?! Well mam, my best advice the doctor replies, get him in the car, drive about a mile from your house, and put him out. If he comes home..dont fuck him!

04-14-2005, 02:20 AM	#12
Vitasoy GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 58,202	haha damn that made my day. __________________ [email protected]

04-14-2005, 03:51 AM	#13
Wolfy Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Wisconsin Posts: 3,574	Two old men were siting around and one had just celebrated his 60th anniversary with his wife. The old man was trying to tel the other all the thngs they did the night before, but was having a hard time with his alzheimers. He tells his crotchety friend, "We had a spectacular evening! Shrimp and steak and a bottle of wine, which at our age is an incredible feat, as you know!" To which his friend inquires, "Where did you go to eat?" The old man scratches his head and ponders a moment. His eyes squint as he tries to recall. He asks his friend, "What's the name of that flower? It's red, has thorns..." "Rose?" "Yeah!" Then he hollers to the kitchen, "ROSE, HONEY! What's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"

04-14-2005, 06:01 AM	#15
webcrawler Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: ICQ .:. 286608143 Posts: 2,692	a good one.

04-14-2005, 06:05 AM	#16
margarita Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 917	__________________ Check out my favourite kinky sponsor and must-have tool Nifty Stats

04-14-2005, 06:22 AM	#17
Ron-AWE Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: AWEmpire.com Posts: 301	That was a good one ! __________________ Adult Webmaster Empire

04-14-2005, 06:26 AM	#18
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,939	Har har..that gave me a chuckle __________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*