Me getting a free "professional" massage next Friday -- what should I tell her to do? - GoFuckYourself.com

TheFLY · 05-16-2002, 05:24 PM

I was in my favorite bar and these two cuties are talking about all their massage friends -- yadda yadda -- she's talking about energy flowing and all this crap -- so I throw in a question about "body readings" -- 10 seconds later I got an appointment for a free massage :p -- anyone got suggestions? I'm going to enjoy this regardless... :p

Cheshire · 05-16-2002, 05:25 PM

Ask for the release technique and then pull out your johnson.

TheFLY · 05-16-2002, 05:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Cheshire
Ask for the release technique and then pull out your johnson.

RELEASE... is that an acronym?

TheFLY · 05-16-2002, 05:28 PM

I think I should buy my models "pro" massages before I shoot them... Nothing worse than a tense model...

Sly_RJ · 05-16-2002, 05:37 PM

Tell them Sly sent you, you'll be treated well my friend...

mrthumbs · 05-16-2002, 06:18 PM

Free massages... those where the days..

Perhaps i SHOULD become a boneprone...

Houdini · 05-16-2002, 06:21 PM

"How much for happy ending?" Since it's free....well, you get the picture.

baddog · 05-16-2002, 06:23 PM

aim high, shoot low

RedShoe · 05-16-2002, 06:28 PM

Seriously, don't mention sex. Just tell her you want "everything". If she's done message long enough, she'll know exactly what you mean.

If you get a stiffy while she's going at it, and she asks you if you want her to finish, say "please do" and just lie there like this happens all the time.

Go in and tell her you want it all, you want the full "rub-n-tug"

Mikey · 05-16-2002, 06:39 PM

I had an old school chinese massage where they use this contraption to create a vacuum over sore parts of your body and suck out the extra air there. The thing looked like a penis enlarger and left these blue/black marks over the areas that make it look like I got hit with a baseball bat.

But it was helpful.

Pipecrew · 05-16-2002, 07:16 PM

Tell her you have an extra 20 and want the rub and tug

bawdy · 05-16-2002, 07:26 PM

ask for 'hand relief'... thats what u want

UnseenWorld · 05-16-2002, 07:32 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by bawdy
ask for 'hand relief'... thats what u want

I've heard it called "the hand finish."

Sugarpuss · 05-16-2002, 08:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Mikey
I had an old school chinese massage where they use this contraption to create a vacuum over sore parts of your body and suck out the extra air there. The thing looked like a penis enlarger and left these blue/black marks over the areas that make it look like I got hit with a baseball bat.

But it was helpful.

A cup massage

jimmy3way · 05-16-2002, 08:43 PM

Tell her you want the 'blow job technique' and see what happens.

beemk · 05-16-2002, 08:49 PM

just pull out your cock, look down at it and say "it's not going to suck itself"

TopTGP · 05-16-2002, 10:56 PM

haha beemk

snarfs · 05-16-2002, 11:13 PM

Hahah

ah seriously though I've been told to ask for "full service"....

Snarfs

TheFLY · 05-16-2002, 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by RedShoe
Seriously, don't mention sex. Just tell her you want "everything". If she's done message long enough, she'll know exactly what you mean.

Ok thanks guys for all the suggestions...

Maybe I should just go in without underwear and a cock ring eheh...

hyper · 05-17-2002, 01:07 AM

yes, then she will show you her cockring

bhutocracy · 05-17-2002, 01:33 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by UnseenWorld

I've heard it called "the hand finish."

its called "manual relief".. or alternatively "oral relief"

bhutocracy · 05-17-2002, 01:38 AM

and don't you dare ask this poor girl for anything close to a sexual act.. she sounds like a professional masseuse.. not a rub'n'tug pro.

my partner is a masseuse.. and i'll tell you right now.. it is to every girls fear and disgust that a client may ask for it.. just have a nice relaxing massage.. if you want a handjob, pay for it.

Hypo · 05-17-2002, 01:38 AM

If you were in Thailand you would have asked for the full body massage where she would have massaged your naked body with hers, with nothing but a slippery layer of bubbly soap in between. Then there would be sex, which is taken for granted.

bhutocracy · 05-17-2002, 01:40 AM

trust me if they're talking energy flow they're a pair of remedial massage students or something... don't make a fool of yourself unless she asks to massage your cock

bhutocracy · 05-17-2002, 01:40 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hypo
If you were in Thailand you would have asked for the full body massage where she would have massaged your naked body with hers, with nothing but a slippery layer of bubbly soap in between. Then there would be sex, which is taken for granted.

you can get those here.. called a "body slide"

bhutocracy · 05-17-2002, 01:46 AM

are "erotic" massage parlours legal in the states?

boneprone · 05-18-2002, 12:24 AM

Two words:

"Happy Ending"

jojojo · 05-18-2002, 12:38 AM

You don't have to wear underwear. Most good masseuses would prefer to have you take them off if you wear them anyways.

If they are any good you won't even care about a bj or handjob.

Just chill out and enjoy it - you obviously have never had a massage before and your body will be dying for it :^)

I have massages all the time from the luxury hotel where I live.

Every man should discover what they are missing at the spas :^)

BTW - Don't wear any clothes that are too expensive because you will get oil all over them - and if they ask you if you want scented or unscented oil - ask for unscented because the scented stuff really gets into your skin and smells all day.

You'll want to shower too when you get home :^)

BTW - you should all get a god damn pedicure too - I'm sure that 90% of the men on this board have dry cracked assed feet. Like I said you don't know what you are all missing.

There are probably a few of you guys that go to the spa all the time that know what I'm talking about

lawpal · 05-18-2002, 01:56 AM

Just ask her to swallow.

LoveAsianChicks · 05-18-2002, 02:10 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by bhutocracy
and don't you dare ask this poor girl for anything close to a sexual act.. she sounds like a professional masseuse.. not a rub'n'tug pro.

my partner is a masseuse.. and i'll tell you right now.. it is to every girls fear and disgust that a client may ask for it.. just have a nice relaxing massage.. if you want a handjob, pay for it.

A guy doesn't go to a masseuse cause his neck is sore. He wants the damn handjob.

bhutocracy · 05-18-2002, 07:27 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by LoveAsianChicks

A guy doesn't go to a masseuse cause his neck is sore. He wants the damn handjob.

heheheheh.. yeah.. but you can't beat a good neck massage

05-16-2002, 05:24 PM	#1
TheFLY So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: http://www.thefly.net/ --- Quit your job and live off steady traffic. Posts: 11,856	Me getting a free "professional" massage next Friday -- what should I tell her to do? I was in my favorite bar and these two cuties are talking about all their massage friends -- yadda yadda -- she's talking about energy flowing and all this crap -- so I throw in a question about "body readings" -- 10 seconds later I got an appointment for a free massage :p -- anyone got suggestions? I'm going to enjoy this regardless... :p

05-16-2002, 05:25 PM	#2
Cheshire Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Rosen-Villin Posts: 5,738	Ask for the release technique and then pull out your johnson. __________________ just a little bit naughty

05-16-2002, 06:28 PM	#9
RedShoe 赤い靴 call me 202-456-1111 Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: The Valley Posts: 14,831	Seriously, don't mention sex. Just tell her you want "everything". If she's done message long enough, she'll know exactly what you mean. If you get a stiffy while she's going at it, and she asks you if you want her to finish, say "please do" and just lie there like this happens all the time. Go in and tell her you want it all, you want the full "rub-n-tug" __________________ SPECIALTY COSTUMES • PROPS • FX Superheroes • Monsters • Robots PM for details For any manufacturing needs. Adult or otherwise. aka BonsHigh on Insta Bonsai weed plants

05-16-2002, 08:43 PM	#15
jimmy3way Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Top Secret Hideout Posts: 2,508	Tell her you want the 'blow job technique' and see what happens. __________________ One thing, I forgot this last detail: the Biz Markie will always prevail.

05-16-2002, 08:49 PM	#16
beemk CLICK HERE Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2002 Posts: 20,829	just pull out your cock, look down at it and say "it's not going to suck itself" __________________ I host with Vacares

05-16-2002, 05:28 PM	#4
TheFLY So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: http://www.thefly.net/ --- Quit your job and live off steady traffic. Posts: 11,856	I think I should buy my models "pro" massages before I shoot them... Nothing worse than a tense model...

05-16-2002, 05:37 PM	#5
Sly_RJ Live Hard - Die Hard Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Ready to leave... Posts: 17,042	Tell them Sly sent you, you'll be treated well my friend...

05-16-2002, 06:18 PM	#6
mrthumbs salad tossing sig guy Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: mrthumbs*gmail.com Posts: 11,702	Free massages... those where the days.. Perhaps i SHOULD become a boneprone...

05-16-2002, 06:21 PM	#7
Houdini Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: SoCal Posts: 1,651	"How much for happy ending?" Since it's free....well, you get the picture.

05-16-2002, 06:23 PM	#8
baddog So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: the beach, SoCal Posts: 107,089	aim high, shoot low

05-16-2002, 06:39 PM	#10
Mikey Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 665	I had an old school chinese massage where they use this contraption to create a vacuum over sore parts of your body and suck out the extra air there. The thing looked like a penis enlarger and left these blue/black marks over the areas that make it look like I got hit with a baseball bat. But it was helpful.

05-16-2002, 07:16 PM	#11
Pipecrew Master of Gfy.com Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2002 Posts: 14,887	Tell her you have an extra 20 and want the rub and tug

05-16-2002, 07:26 PM	#12
bawdy Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2002 Posts: 1,424	ask for 'hand relief'... thats what u want

05-16-2002, 10:56 PM	#17
TopTGP Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: poco, BC, Canada Posts: 546	haha beemk __________________ I can't think of anything funny to say..

05-16-2002, 11:13 PM	#18
snarfs Registered User Join Date: May 2002 Location: Sacramento, CA Posts: 64	Hahah ah seriously though I've been told to ask for "full service".... Snarfs

05-17-2002, 01:07 AM	#20
hyper Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Mass Ass Posts: 5,294	yes, then she will show you her cockring __________________

05-17-2002, 01:38 AM	#22
bhutocracy Not making A Comeback Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 10,218	and don't you dare ask this poor girl for anything close to a sexual act.. she sounds like a professional masseuse.. not a rub'n'tug pro. my partner is a masseuse.. and i'll tell you right now.. it is to every girls fear and disgust that a client may ask for it.. just have a nice relaxing massage.. if you want a handjob, pay for it.

05-17-2002, 01:38 AM	#23
Hypo So Fucking Banned Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 1,104	If you were in Thailand you would have asked for the full body massage where she would have massaged your naked body with hers, with nothing but a slippery layer of bubbly soap in between. Then there would be sex, which is taken for granted.

05-17-2002, 01:40 AM	#24
bhutocracy Not making A Comeback Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 10,218	trust me if they're talking energy flow they're a pair of remedial massage students or something... don't make a fool of yourself unless she asks to massage your cock

05-17-2002, 01:46 AM	#26
bhutocracy Not making A Comeback Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 10,218	are "erotic" massage parlours legal in the states?

05-18-2002, 12:24 AM	#27
boneprone Hall Of Fame Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Portland Oregon USA Posts: 34,415	Two words: "Happy Ending"

05-18-2002, 12:38 AM	#28
jojojo Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Vancouver, BC Posts: 2,318	You don't have to wear underwear. Most good masseuses would prefer to have you take them off if you wear them anyways. If they are any good you won't even care about a bj or handjob. Just chill out and enjoy it - you obviously have never had a massage before and your body will be dying for it :^) I have massages all the time from the luxury hotel where I live. Every man should discover what they are missing at the spas :^) BTW - Don't wear any clothes that are too expensive because you will get oil all over them - and if they ask you if you want scented or unscented oil - ask for unscented because the scented stuff really gets into your skin and smells all day. You'll want to shower too when you get home :^) BTW - you should all get a god damn pedicure too - I'm sure that 90% of the men on this board have dry cracked assed feet. Like I said you don't know what you are all missing. There are probably a few of you guys that go to the spa all the time that know what I'm talking about

05-18-2002, 01:56 AM	#29
lawpal Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Miami Posts: 824	Just ask her to swallow.