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Old 06-27-2007, 03:15 PM   #1
punker barbie
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I need a man in my household

Neither my roommate and i can open the apple juice bottle
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:16 PM   #2
Profits of Doom
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I'm available. Just saying...
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:17 PM   #3
Jman
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Let me correct you...

You Need a FrenchMan in your household

Good with is hands and as a french speaking tongue...

Oui fucking Oui!!!
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:18 PM   #4
SilkyJohnson
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I wish Achmed were here, he would know what to do...
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:18 PM   #5
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I predict 2 pages of volunteers.. lol
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:19 PM   #6
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men are over rated
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:20 PM   #7
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I predict 2 pages of volunteers.. lol
wayyyyyyy more then that LOL
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:22 PM   #8
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men are over rated
Ya, but the can open the shit out of some apple juice bottles.
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:24 PM   #9
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men are over rated
I do snore really loud, too, so that might be a deal breaker...
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:25 PM   #10
punker barbie
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I can deal with snoring. Im a stoned cold sleeper. Fellas post pics my roommie and i are taking applications. hehe
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:25 PM   #11
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apple juice makes you fart anyways
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:26 PM   #12
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I wish Achmed were here, he would know what to do...
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:26 PM   #13
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Use your nose. That should be able to hook around the cap and a thousand others and pry that bitch off. Wither that or use a hip bone as a can opener
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:28 PM   #14
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:29 PM   #15
Profits of Doom
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I can deal with snoring. Im a stoned cold sleeper. Fellas post pics my roommie and i are taking applications. hehe
I have a pug that also snores when he is sleeping, so the two of us together sound like heavy machinery operating at night...
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:30 PM   #16
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My wife said I can come over. I'm an apple juice opener expert.

Trust me.
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:33 PM   #17
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I'm free for the next sixty years of my life Punker. I'll gladly move in with you and be your servant boy.
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:33 PM   #18
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Ya know.

I've said the same thing many times.. then I stop to think about all the other hassles that come with having a man in the house.... and I think I'd opt to drink something other than apple juice.

Maybe I've just never found the right man.

PK
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:33 PM   #19
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I will fill the position HOWEVER I must tell you there can be NO SEX, I just want to talk and cuddle.

oh and I give great massages too.

;)

-Loki-
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:35 PM   #20
baddog
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fireman is off the market . . . too late
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:37 PM   #21
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do you like the falafel ms. barbie?
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:40 PM   #22
MaDalton
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i would love to open your... ehemmm... bottle
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:46 PM   #23
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I can open apple juice, jam jars, mayo aswell as many other types of twisty things that need ot be opened... haha
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:47 PM   #24
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I wouldn't you really just prefer this

and this
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:47 PM   #25
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this is some serious business
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Old 06-27-2007, 03:54 PM   #26
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I recommend avoiding the additional dead weight, and just use your charm on the clerk at the store - have him open it when you buy it, then just close it back up for the drive home

Last edited by Redmanthatcould; 06-27-2007 at 03:56 PM..
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Old 06-27-2007, 05:40 PM   #27
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Try a rubber band?
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Old 06-27-2007, 05:44 PM   #28
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i recommend achmed
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Old 06-27-2007, 05:51 PM   #29
p1mpdogg
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what happend to the felon?
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Old 06-27-2007, 05:51 PM   #30
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Fedex it to me and I'll open it for you.
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Old 06-27-2007, 05:52 PM   #31
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I'm good with my hands..hence my job..and only snore when drunk..
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Old 06-27-2007, 05:54 PM   #32
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Old 06-27-2007, 06:02 PM   #33
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black and decker make an auto jar opener.
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Old 06-27-2007, 06:08 PM   #34
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Ya know.

I've said the same thing many times.. then I stop to think about all the other hassles that come with having a man in the house.... and I think I'd opt to drink something other than apple juice.

Maybe I've just never found the right man.

PK
I switched to pineapple juice for that exact same reason!!
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Old 06-27-2007, 06:09 PM   #35
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i recommend achmed
I would like to go on record as seconding this and would like to add that Achmed is most likely, probably, without a doubt, kind of an outstanding gentlemen.
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Old 06-27-2007, 06:40 PM   #36
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run the top under hot water for 1 minute then try.
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Old 06-27-2007, 06:42 PM   #37
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Tap the lid gently with a butter knife
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Old 06-27-2007, 06:55 PM   #38
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Tap the lid gently with a butter knife
what he said
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Old 06-27-2007, 07:34 PM   #39
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move into my house

do the dishes and vacuum the floors, dust the furniture and I'll open all the apple juice bottles you need.
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Old 06-27-2007, 09:28 PM   #40
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Honey I am a man and I can help, just send me the address.
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Old 06-27-2007, 09:49 PM   #41
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Can't you buy apple juice in a box or something?
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Old 06-28-2007, 04:01 PM   #42
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Damn you punker barbie!!!

I just went to open the apple juice and I can't open it and there are no men around to do it for me. You cursed apple juice bottles everywhere.
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Old 06-28-2007, 04:07 PM   #43
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i had an accident that took away 70% or my grip strength... my prenis is grateful, but I can't open the bottle for you either. sorry.
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Old 06-28-2007, 04:24 PM   #44
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I can deal with snoring. Im a stoned cold sleeper. Fellas post pics my roommie and i are taking applications. hehe
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Old 06-28-2007, 04:26 PM   #45
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id hit ya baby
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Old 06-28-2007, 04:33 PM   #46
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I'll have to ask my wife first, but it shouldn't be an issue.
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Old 06-28-2007, 04:36 PM   #47
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Did somebody say APPLE?!?!?!
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Old 06-28-2007, 04:37 PM   #48
Juicy D. Links
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A/S/L pics???????????/
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Old 06-28-2007, 05:41 PM   #49
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I'd love to see some pics of you and your roomate trying to "open the apple juice bottle"....

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Old 06-28-2007, 05:47 PM   #50
trix
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Well, a man is always better than a can opener but....

Take a regular oldschool can opener (the narrow sharp pointed one used to open beer cans back in the day)

Turn it upside down, stick the point up under the lid, slightly push. Move over an inch and do it again. Pretty soon the lid will let go/ the seal will pop and you can open it right up. You will hear the hiss.

I know this because years ago I had a stubborn lid on spaghetti sauce stick and a jar shatter and I got cut.
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