Rules of Minnesota - GoFuckYourself.com

Compdoctor · 07-29-2007, 09:37 PM

1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.

2. Let's get this straight; it's called a 'gravel road.' I drive a
pickup truck because I want to. No matter how slow you drive, you're going to
get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.

3.You say our lakes smell to you. They smell like money to us. Get over
it.

4. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have $250,000
combines that are driven only 3 times a year.

5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's called being friendly.
Try to understand the concept.

6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of ducks are coming in, we
WILL shoot it out of your hand You better hope you don't have it up to your
ear at the time.

7. Yeah, we eat walleye & northern pike and love it. You really want
sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.

8. The 'Opener' refers to the first day of deer season. It's a
Religious holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.

9. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of
age.

10. No, there's no 'vegetarian special' on the menu. Order steak. Or
you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the pound of ham & turkey.

11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats,
vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: Onion, Pepper, and Garlic!

12. You bring 'coke' into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served
over ice. You bring 'Mary Jane' into my house, she better be cute,
know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.

13. College and High School Football is as important here as the Lakers
and the Knicks, and a hell of a lot more fun to watch.

14. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards -it
spooks the fish.

15. Colleges? Try St. Olaf, Concordia, Gustavus or St. John's. They come out of
there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they
still wave at passing pickups when they come home for the holidays.

16. We have more folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines, than
any other state, so 'Don't screw with Minnesota ,' If you do, you
will get whipped by the best.'

Michaelious · 07-29-2007, 09:38 PM

Lol funny! I like it

tony286 · 07-29-2007, 09:41 PM

I will tell my wife about this one ,she will love it.

bobby666 · 07-29-2007, 11:36 PM

i have to move to minnesota

Compdoctor · 07-30-2007, 06:12 AM

it is a nice place to play, and live

Ramos · 07-30-2007, 06:14 AM

Always pay respect to Kirby Puckett!

He put Minnesota on the map!

sniperwolf · 07-30-2007, 09:14 AM

wow! that's awesome....

Scott McD · 07-30-2007, 09:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Compdoctor

19. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.

Fuck that then...

KBoogie · 07-30-2007, 09:23 AM

Been a Southern Cali girl my whole life but this is really funny!

atom · 07-30-2007, 10:14 AM

wow, you must live out in the sticks. I live in a suburb 20 minutes outside of Minneapolis and its nothing like that.

DaddyHalbucks · 07-30-2007, 11:11 AM

Good one, thanks for sharing.

GigoloMason · 07-30-2007, 11:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atom

wow, you must live out in the sticks. I live in a suburb 20 minutes outside of Minneapolis and its nothing like that.

I was thinking the same thing

07-29-2007, 09:37 PM	#1
Compdoctor Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: True 3D Content Posts: 1,937	Rules of Minnesota 1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot. 2. Let's get this straight; it's called a 'gravel road.' I drive a pickup truck because I want to. No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way. 3.You say our lakes smell to you. They smell like money to us. Get over it. 4. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have $250,000 combines that are driven only 3 times a year. 5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's called being friendly. Try to understand the concept. 6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of ducks are coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time. 7. Yeah, we eat walleye & northern pike and love it. You really want sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop. 8. The 'Opener' refers to the first day of deer season. It's a Religious holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November. 9. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age. 10. No, there's no 'vegetarian special' on the menu. Order steak. Or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the pound of ham & turkey. 11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: Onion, Pepper, and Garlic! 12. You bring 'coke' into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served over ice. You bring 'Mary Jane' into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair. 13. College and High School Football is as important here as the Lakers and the Knicks, and a hell of a lot more fun to watch. 14. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards -it spooks the fish. 15. Colleges? Try St. Olaf, Concordia, Gustavus or St. John's. They come out of there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they still wave at passing pickups when they come home for the holidays. 16. We have more folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines, than any other state, so 'Don't screw with Minnesota ,' If you do, you will get whipped by the best.' __________________ Content By Compdoctor- Original 3D Cartoon Work 3D Comics Anime Resource Accepting Toon/Hentai Links

07-29-2007, 09:38 PM	#2
Michaelious Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Scotland Posts: 6,720	Lol funny! I like it __________________

07-29-2007, 11:36 PM	#4
bobby666 boots are my religion Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Heart of europe Posts: 21,765	i have to move to minnesota __________________

07-30-2007, 06:12 AM	#5
Compdoctor Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: True 3D Content Posts: 1,937	it is a nice place to play, and live __________________ Content By Compdoctor- Original 3D Cartoon Work 3D Comics Anime Resource Accepting Toon/Hentai Links

07-30-2007, 06:14 AM	#6
Ramos Custom User Title Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 11,927	Always pay respect to Kirby Puckett! He put Minnesota on the map! __________________ blewit.com - Performance & Pleasure Training For Men.

07-29-2007, 09:41 PM	#3
tony286 lurker Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: atlanta Posts: 57,021	I will tell my wife about this one ,she will love it.

07-30-2007, 09:14 AM	#7
sniperwolf Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 17,743	wow! that's awesome.... __________________ ~Accepting design works~

07-30-2007, 09:23 AM	#9
KBoogie Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 740	Been a Southern Cali girl my whole life but this is really funny! __________________ Kristin www.smartbucks.com www.ten.com ICQ: 367485738 AIM: KrsJy1 1 join = $40pps \| 2+ joins = $50pps \| 5+ joins = $75pps \| 10+ joins = $100pps

07-30-2007, 10:14 AM	#10
atom Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Minneapolis Posts: 2,739	wow, you must live out in the sticks. I live in a suburb 20 minutes outside of Minneapolis and its nothing like that. __________________ Adult is dead.... Want to push a mainstream product that works? Hit me up at adam @ Natures86 dot com

07-30-2007, 11:11 AM	#11
DaddyHalbucks A freakin' legend! Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Las Vegas, Nevada USA Posts: 18,975	Good one, thanks for sharing. __________________ Boner Money