Kids or No Kids?

[slackologist]

How many of you have children?

[detoxed]

I hope to god i dont have any kids yet

[TweetyBird]

I don't have any as yet.. but one day, who knows ??

[Living For Today]

haha. no kids i know of either. the day will come though.

[slackologist]

Originally posted by detoxed
I hope to god i dont have any kids yet

[Shortbread]

None that I know of.

[kenny]

I dont have any. But I like them just fine

Just to many at one time is to much. Maximum 2

[Vanilla DeVille]

I love kids!

[Jeff aka NIGHTfall]

i love kids.. just dont want one right now. maybe when im settled in later. all my life, my mother ran a daycare out of the house so when i was 8 i got to help her out with babies and shit. then my father had a daughter when i was 12 and now she is 6 and i fucking love her so much. i want a daugher some day and i want her to be just like my half sister.


kids are great until they turn about 8... then they turn into punks.

i love the death outta babies and love kids when they are at that age when they just learn how to talk and make sence, but not all the words are said right. like my fathers daughter shauna, she use to call my mother "ka key" because she couldnt say Kathy, and i was "beff" because she couldnt say jeff... i miss them days



-Jeff

[Sarah_Jayne]

two grown step daughters that don't live with us..i'm 27 and a walking jerry springer show.

[Jeff aka NIGHTfall]

**** i want ms. Vanilla to have my kids

[rett11]

I've got 2 beautiful. girls, 4 and 8. I l.ove them immensely.

[Vic Lagina]

Originally posted by Shortbread
None that I know of.

What he said.

[Ic3m4nZ]

Maybe in like 12 years.. I'm only turning 19 soon..

[pimplink]

Kids are like angels from above
so I think I'm gonna have one
someday.

[EZRhino]

I got one, and havent had a full nights sleep in 2 months

[slackologist]

Originally posted by EZRhino
I got one, and havent had a full nights sleep in 2 months

I know the feeling, i'm still paying off mine in sleepless nights also. (9months)

[Illicit]

been lucky so far, lots of close calls, but no positive pregnancy tests

[baddog]

I have at least 2, both older than most of the people here I think

[reynold]

I think I'll have one someday....

[phogirl69]

All the guys that say they want or love their kids, are you willing to take EXACTLY 50% responsibility for child rearing and taking care of the kids? If you had to quit down on some hours (if you had a regular job) to help raise your kids would you do it? Or don't tell me you would expect your wife/girlfriend to quit her job to devote her life to raising the kids because you think your job is so much more important ?

I think it's unfair how husbands expect their wives to quit their job and do 99% of the child rearing duties while the men most of the time just play with their kid for a while and think that's enough. I wonder how many guys actually change diapers and help feed their babies? My friend has a baby, and her bf complained and got extremely angry for having to watch it even a day, while she raises the baby all by herself day in and day out. I don't think men can stand the crying and having to take care of it.

That's another reason why I would never have kids. I don't want to devote my life to someone else, I want to live my life for myself.

[Rorschach]

Not in the near future thanks... or at all if I have it my way.

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69
All the guys that say they want or love their kids, are you willing to take EXACTLY 50% responsibility for child rearing and taking care of the kids? If you had to quit down on some hours (if you had a regular job) to help raise your kids would you do it? Or don't tell me you would expect your wife/girlfriend to quit her job to devote her life to raising the kids because you think your job is so much important ?

I think it's unfair how husbands expect their wives to quit their job and do 99% of the child rearing duties while the men most of the time just play with their kid for a while and think that's enough. I wonder how many guys actually change diapers and help feed their babies?

That's another reason why I would never have kids. I don't want to devote my life to someone else, I want to live my life for myself.

you need to find someone that would fuck you first I think

[phogirl69]

Originally posted by baddog


you need to find someone that would fuck you first I think

Better look in the mirror before you start talking. What does what I said have anything do with anyone wanting to fuck me?
What I said above is the truth, men don't want to take responsiblity for raising their own kids.

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69


Better look in the mirror before you start talking. What does what I said have anything do with anyone wanting to fuck me?
What I said is the truth.

I already have 2 kids, so I obviously got laid at least twice

[pimplink]

No, don't have as of now. But I do hope I'll have maybe 3 kids someday.

[slackologist]

Originally posted by phogirl69
All the guys that say they want or love their kids, are you willing to take EXACTLY 50% responsibility for child rearing and taking care of the kids? If you had to quit down on some hours (if you had a regular job) to help raise your kids would you do it? Or don't tell me you would expect your wife/girlfriend to quit her job to devote her life to raising the kids because you think your job is so much important ?

I think it's unfair how husbands expect their wives to quit their job and do 99% of the child rearing duties while the men most of the time just play with their kid for a while and think that's enough. I wonder how many guys actually change diapers and help feed their babies?

That's another reason why I would never have kids. I don't want to devote my life to someone else, I want to live my life for myself.

My partner quit work around 7 weeks into her pregnancy, this was her choice.

After the birth, i worked 3 days / week and spent the other 2 at home helping with all the chores, washing/cleaning etc , nappy changing feeding, preparing food ( cutting up a small forest of vegetables and boiling them, then freezing them into ice cubes,s ame with fruit, meat etc etc..

9 months later, i've started full-time ( I'd much rather stay at home with our child - but 1) we need the money my job provides and 2) i can't breast feed and 3) my partner wants to stay at home with our child.

She's looking at going into teaching over hte next 2-3 years and i'm supporting her in that. It's a game of balance and compromise. I'd like more time with my child and if she goes back to work i'll be only too happy to give up my day job.

I've devoted my life to my family.

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69


What I said above is the truth, men don't want to take responsiblity for raising their own kids.

and BTW, fuck you. I raised two great kids that are undoubtably going to contribute more to society than you can ever hope to achieve

[phogirl69]

Originally posted by baddog


I already have 2 kids, so I obviously got laid at least twice

Don't worry about me, I could get fucked anytime I want. The thing is that I actually have standards and I don't get with just anybody. What does me getting fucked have to do with my opinion? Where is all this hatred coming from? Are you still annoyed at me because I didn't want to tell you where I lived in socal last time on another thread? After that incident you seemed to like to take jabs at me. sorry, didn't mean to hurt your feelings, I didn't know you would take it so personally.

[phogirl69]

Originally posted by baddog


and BTW, fuck you. I raised two great kids that are undoubtably going to contribute more to society than you can ever hope to achieve

wow, I wasn't even talking about you, I don't know why you have to take it so personally and cry about it. I was referring to "most men" or "the majority" which is true. There are some guys that take great care of their kids, and there are great dads who are single parents. I was posing a question, didn't know it would rub you the wrong way that much.

All I'm saying is that I would never be a housewife, I would expect the guy to contribute too. That is just my opinion, and I'm entitled to it. Because I have strong opinions no one wants to fuck me now? mmmm... okaaaaay...

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69


Don't worry about me, I could get fucked anytime I want. The thing is that I actually have standards and I don't get with just anybody. What does me getting fucked have to do with my opinion? Where is all this hatred coming from? Are you still annoyed at me because I didn't want to tell you where I lived in socal last time on another thread? After that incident you seemed to like to take jabs at me. sorry, didn't mean to hurt your feelings, I didn't know you would take it so personally.

that will teach me to eat while reading GFY, I almost choked on that last bite.

You give yourself way too much credit. I had to stop and figure out WTF you were talking about, but for the record, I could give two shits as to where you live.

And yah, being a chick I suppose you can get laid in a pinch, but with your attitude I am sure you are going to have a hard time finding anyone of quality.

You are going to have to remind me, Isn't this the second time I have ever talked to you?

[phogirl69]

Originally posted by baddog


that will teach me to eat while reading GFY, I almost choked on that last bite.

You give yourself way too much credit. I had to stop and figure out WTF you were talking about, but for the record, I could give two shits as to where you live.

And yah, being a chick I suppose you can get laid in a pinch, but with your attitude I am sure you are going to have a hard time finding anyone of quality.

You are going to have to remind me, Isn't this the second time I have ever talked to you?

Ok, but why do you think I have a bad attitude? Just because I don't want to be a housewife and sacrify my life? Because I have certain opinions you may not disagree with I'm a bitch? So what consists of a "good attitude"? Some who is passive and loves to
stay home and serve her husband on hand and foot?

Ok, well sorry about the comment about where I live. I just thought maybe that's why you were annoyed...

Do you think I have an "attitude" because I'm independent, and I won't bow down to anyone? I just feel that responsibilities should be divided equally, that to me seems fair. How is that attitude?

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69


wow, I wasn't even talking about you, I don't know why you have to take it so personally and cry about it. I was referring to "most men" or "the majority" which is true.

hmmmm,

Originally posted by phogirl69


What I said above is the truth, men don't want to take responsiblity for raising their own kids.

does seem to be grouping us all together. . . . on top of that, I hardly doubt you know "most men" or even a "majority" of them

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69


Ok, but why do you think I have a bad attitude?

one more time

Originally posted by phogirl69


What I said above is the truth, men don't want to take responsiblity for raising their own kids.

[phogirl69]

Originally posted by baddog


does seem to be grouping us all together. . . . on top of that, I hardly doubt you know "most men" or even a "majority" of them

I don't know all men obviously , I can only speak from experience from what I have seen from people around me that have kids, such as my friends, family, my father. I am just talking from things I have observed.

ok, and I'll edit my sentence just for you Baddog

Originally posted by phogirl69


What I said above is the truth, MOST men don't want to take half the responsiblity for raising their own kids.

MOST but not ALL
and I edited in the "HALF the responsibility"

[slackologist]

Originally posted by slackologist


My partner quit work around 7 weeks into her pregnancy, this was her choice.

After the birth, i worked 3 days / week and spent the other 2 at home helping with all the chores, washing/cleaning etc , nappy changing feeding, preparing food ( cutting up a small forest of vegetables and boiling them, then freezing them into ice cubes,s ame with fruit, meat etc etc..

9 months later, i've started full-time ( I'd much rather stay at home with our child - but 1) we need the money my job provides and 2) i can't breast feed and 3) my partner wants to stay at home with our child.

She's looking at going into teaching over hte next 2-3 years and i'm supporting her in that. It's a game of balance and compromise. I'd like more time with my child and if she goes back to work i'll be only too happy to give up my day job.

I've devoted my life to my family.

Most men i know share the duties as much as possible, i know a few men that stay at home with the kids while the mother works full-time, it's not uncommon here, but perhaps a cultural problem exists wherever you are, phogirl69.

[phogirl69]

Originally posted by slackologist


Most men i know share the duties as much as possible, i know a few men that stay at home with the kids while the mother works full-time, it's not uncommon here, but perhaps a cultural problem exists wherever you are, phogirl69.

You sound like a great dad! No, there's no cultural problem where I am, I think I'm just really , I don't know how to say it,
"disillusioned" so I see sexism everywhere in all areas of life sometimes perhaps when it doesn't even exist. I just read a lot of stuff about double standards on certain fields like law or medicine, and that a lot of women work part-time once they have kids and that hinders the advancement of their careers, and this is here in the US, not some society where the culture is really old fashioned or anything. So they don't get promoted as much in the work force and aren't seen as good workers because they have to balance family and work.

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69


I don't know all men obviously , I can only speak from experience from what I have seen from people around me that have kids, such as my friends, family, my father. I am just talking from things I have observed.

ok, and I'll edit my sentence just for you Baddog

Originally posted by phogirl69


What I said above is the truth, MOST men don't want to take responsiblity for raising their own kids.

MOST but not ALL

yeah, I was sitting here figuring that you are probably too young to have really dealt with any real men, probably mainly boys. so I guessed that you must have come from a broken family, or had a bad relationship with your father. Don't hold that against the real men out there.

As far as any "observations" you may have - if you are talking to your girlfriends that are divorced, do you really think they are going to speak highly of the ex? Consider the source.

Most men I know are responsible for their children. Since men usually make more than women, it is only natural that if one parent is going to quit work it would be the chick, besides, most of them want to quit so they can "bond."

Personally, I started working the graveyard shift so I could take care of my kids during the day, teach at their school, coach their soccer, little league and basketball teams, and participate in their scouting activities.

So yeah, I might take it a little personal when you come off with comments like

Originally posted by phogirl69


What I said above is the truth, men don't want to take responsiblity for raising their own kids.

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69

I just read a lot of stuff about double standards on certain fields like law or medicine, and that a lot of women work part-time once they have kids and that hinders the advancement of their careers, and this is here in the US, not some society where the culture is really old fashioned or anything. So they don't get promoted as much in the work force and aren't seen as good workers because they have to balance family and work.

this is because the woman decides that she wants to have a family more than she wants to have a career. That is not the man's fault.

After all, it is entirely the woman's decision if there will be children or not.

[phogirl69]

Originally posted by baddog

I'm not that young, I'll be hitting mid 20's in 2 months so that is not that young. But how do you feel if the woman makes more than the man and she would rather work?

If I work really hard at a career and would not want to sacrifice that for a family. I just feel that I want to live life for myself, and not be responsible for anyone else. I just want to be free, if I want to travel somewhere I just want to go without having any obligations, I don't want anything or anyone holding me back in life, I want to enjoy life and be sucessful carreer-wise, I also don't want anything hindering my career, especially if I have worked so hard for it.

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69


I'm not that young, I'll be hitting mid 20's in 2 months so that is not that young.

*note to self: do not eat while reading GFY


Look, like I said before, it is up to the woman if there will be any kids or not. If she has a career and a man that is willing to take care of the child rearing, then more power to the two of them.

I am just saying don't get knocked up, and then decide that you are going to try and force the father to take on the rearing responsibilities. This should be decided before pregnancy.

From reading your comments I think it is a great idea if you never have children, however, I will not be the least bit surprised that if in 10 years your biological clock starts ticking loud enough to keep some guy awake at night

[brizzad]

i had a daughter when i was 17..

i wanted her mother to choose adoption, and she didnt..


im so glad she didnt, i have NO regrets at all

[phogirl69]

Originally posted by baddog


*note to self: do not eat while reading GFY


Look, like I said before, it is up to the woman if there will be any kids or not. If she has a career and a man that is willing to take care of the child rearing, then more power to the two of them.

I am just saying don't get knocked up, and then decide that you are going to try and force the father to take on the rearing responsibilities. This should be decided before pregnancy.

From reading your comments I think it is a great idea if you never have children, however, I will not be the least bit surprised that if in 10 years your biological clock starts ticking loud enough to keep some guy awake at night

I think some people are more "motherly" and nurturing than others. I have never liked kids a lot, and to be honest I prefer not to be around them, so I don't think my biological clock will start ticking. To be honest, I don't even really like to play with kids at all. I think I'm more an agressive and ambitious person that "nurturing" or a "caretaker".

And I would never just decide to get pregnant and make the father raise the kids on his own, I'm one of those people who overanalyze and overplan everything, I would know how he felt about it beforehand. But it would have to be exactly 50/50. Although there are men who take great care of their kids, sometimes its 60/40 or 55/45 with the mother taking just a " tiny bit" more care of the kids than the guy is.

Also, with the salary thing, women are catching up and some are making more than men.... in a hundred years or so it might get close to equal.

Also, I'm 25 (in 2 monthhs) , so in 10 yrs that's 35, that's a bit risky for having kids edging towards 40 (more complications the older you get), I thought most women's clocks start ticking at 30.

I also know some women consciously make the decision to stay home so it's not the husbands fault, but I just can't imagine it for myself, I don't like that choice. It would be so depressing to stay home all the time. I feel really bad for them, some are doctors and lawyers and spent over 100k on their education and know they are going to progress as well as the others in their field because they have taken too much time off. I suppose it's their choice not to put their kids in daycare.

[GiantGnome]

I have 2 boys and have been a stay at home dad for 14 years and a home maker for about 18 years while the wife goes to work. Id like to say I do most of the chores but I am afraid my wife might read this and kill me for lying.

Not every man wants thier wife to be a house wife.

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69

But it would have to be exactly 50/50. Although there are men who take great care of their kids, sometimes its 60/40 or 55/45 with the mother taking just a " tiny bit" more care of the kids than the guy is.

I noticed you took out the "more than my fair share" comment. Good move.

Trust me, you would make a lousy mother, please don't change your mind and get pregnant

[X-Wing]

Someday... maybe maybe

[phogirl69]

Originally posted by baddog


I noticed you took out the "more than my fair share" comment. Good move.

Trust me, you would make a lousy mother, please don't change your mind and get pregnant

You said the "fair share" part in another post you made, not the one I was quoting. I may have been quoting you, but I wasn't referring to you specifically, I adressed some points you made, but the 60/40 part was redirected to some cases, not to you!
You've made your point, your a great dad and did you share fair of raising yor kids, I get it.

Also, I get my numbers from research I've done on the net on this topic. So it's not like pulling numbers out of my head.

[armyofme]

i saw my godson today. he's awfully cute, despite the drool and the boogers. during dinner he mashed peas up his nose and smeared spaghetti in his ears.....makes me want to have a dozen of 'em.

[baddog]

Originally posted by phogirl69


So it's not like pulling numbers out of my head.

I never thought you were pulling them out of your head . . . a little lower and to the rear.

[sickkittens]

not I - 10 yrs maybe.