funny pickup lines....? - GoFuckYourself.com

CyberHustler · 08-05-2007, 06:18 PM

how about you come sit on my lap and talk about the first thing that pops up...

any others?

CyberHustler · 08-05-2007, 06:21 PM

Here's another one...

Are you a parking ticket? (huh?) because you got fine written all over you!

techtony · 08-05-2007, 06:22 PM

I"m new in town, could I have directions to your house?

I may not be fred flinstone buy I can make your bed rock!

M0nk · 08-05-2007, 09:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by techtony

I may not be fred flinstone buy I can make your bed rock!

that one is just amazing!!!!

techtony · 08-05-2007, 09:57 PM

Hi, I make more money than you can spend. that one should get them every time.

CyberHustler · 08-05-2007, 09:57 PM

Do you know karate? 'Cause your body is really kickin'...

Hey, I lost my phone number... Can I have yours?

Spunky · 08-05-2007, 09:59 PM

You couldn't handle 10 inches

RawAlex · 08-05-2007, 10:00 PM

" I don't know your name, but your skirt is familiar"

techtony · 08-05-2007, 10:00 PM

Hi, will you help me find my puppy, I think he went into that cheap hotel accross the street.

Vick! · 08-05-2007, 10:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cyber-Hu$tler

Hey, I lost my phone number... Can I have yours?

this one rocks

Spunky · 08-05-2007, 10:03 PM

Get your ass up in the air and I'll be with you in a minute...Jack Nicholson

Profits of Doom · 08-05-2007, 10:06 PM

10 Psycho Pick-Up Lines

1. Didn't I see you on the grassy knoll?

2. Can I buy you a spatula?

3. Bet you're wondering why I have no nostrils.

4. Your crawlspace or mine?

5. You look like the kind of person who appreciates catheters.

6. May I lick your forehead?

7. Do you always wear your shoes over your socks?

8. Smeep. Smeep. Smeep.

9. What's your favorite flavor of wood?

10. You've stolen my heart, but I have three more back home in the freezer.

techtony · 08-05-2007, 10:10 PM

I like my women like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freazer.

cashbot · 08-05-2007, 10:12 PM

"scream and I'll kill you"

Spunky · 08-05-2007, 10:13 PM

How about $35?

CyberHustler · 08-05-2007, 10:17 PM

Oh no, I'm choking! I need mouth to mouth, quick...!

You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more...?

Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why, don't you like pizza...?

Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package...

I heard legs was the word of the day. how bout you come back to my place and spread the word...

It may look like a needle, but i works like a sewing machine baby...!

techtony · 08-05-2007, 10:17 PM

sssshhh, just lay in the ice and don't say a word.

Violetta · 08-05-2007, 10:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cashbot

"scream and I'll kill you"

Azz21 · 08-05-2007, 10:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cyber-Hu$tler

I heard legs was the word of the day. how bout you come back to my place and spread the word...

gecko · 08-06-2007, 12:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cashbot

"scream and I'll kill you"

I knew that was coming

D · 08-06-2007, 12:30 AM

You know... (:look woman from head to toe, and then back to her eyes: )... I can make you walk funny.

Actually batting .250 on that one.

D · 08-06-2007, 12:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by techtony

I like my women like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freazer.

Quote:

Originally Posted by cashbot

"scream and I'll kill you"

I'd bet nearly any amount of money you guys rarely - if ever - get laid.

Grow a pair, and move beyond the gynophobia, eh?

g$$$ · 08-06-2007, 12:37 AM

nice legs..what time they open?

Vitasoy · 08-06-2007, 12:44 AM

heh some of those are hilarious

Holly · 08-06-2007, 12:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by D

I'd bet nearly any amount of money you guys rarely - if ever - get laid.

Grow a pair, and move beyond the gynophobia, eh?

I hate to rain on your parade, but yours really wasn't any better.

SexualDragon · 08-06-2007, 01:58 AM

I love every bone in your body, especially mine

D · 08-06-2007, 02:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Holly

I hate to rain on your parade, but yours really wasn't any better.

Hey... it worked once!

And when it didn't, it always got a laugh.

The ones that I quoted on that post were just... disturbing. Mine hinted at rough sex with a large penis... theirs strongly suggested actual violence against women.

I'd say that's a difference.

fris · 08-06-2007, 04:41 AM

you must be an astrologer because my libra is rising

you must be in the kkk because i think we'll have a lot of fun once we get under the sheets

you must be grand theft auto: san andreas because once i get inside of you i'm going to do all sorts of illegal things

you must be herbal essences because masturbating with you is a totally organic experience

you must be a 0day topsite because I just wanna max out your slots

you must be an HTTP status code because all i'm getting is: 402 Payment Required

you must be Frogger because I would cross rush hour traffic and cascading rivers in order to hop in your hole 6 times in a row

you must be a dialup internet connection because every time i want to do something useful on the phone i have to shut you up

you must be a rare warez release because after i get my hands on you, i'm going to pass you off to all of my friends

you must be the warp core of the starship enterprise because if you ever start acting up i will dump you

you must be a game of texas holdem cuz i just wanna go all in

you must be OSX because you're beautiful and alluring but mostly worthless

you must be a free porn website, because after one 10 minute visit i'll never see you again

you must be internet explorer because you give me popups all the time

you must be a hydroponic grow system because i cant wait to introduce my seeds

you must be aol instant messenger because i'd like to see all of my buddies on you

you must be haggis cause you make me want to stuff you with old meat

you must be an internet forum because i am about to try and impress you using my stale in jokes from 1998

CyberHustler · 08-06-2007, 04:51 AM

If I flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances are of getting head?

Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus.

What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.

I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?

bizarrejan · 08-06-2007, 04:52 AM

some idiot once used this on me, "can i kiss you where you wee" obviously was going to kiss the toilet,

fris · 08-06-2007, 05:07 AM

you must be a drow elf sorceress because you have cast level 3 ensnare on my heart

did you install back orifice 2000 on me because you just caused my cd tray to eject

you must be alan greenspan because you have just raised my interest rate by several percentage points

you must be a sata2 hard drive because you are modestly increasing my pipe

you must be a .bin with no .cue file because I have to wrangle with you for hours only be burned in the end

you must be java bytecode because you let me use you anywhere I want

you must be a microsoft product because when i find your holes i'm going to exploit them

you must be internet explorer because you give me popups all the time

you must be charles barkley because i want to take you to the hole but i doubt you would be impressed with my full-court press

you must be an o'reilly technical manual because despite your high price tag, you never say anything meaningful

you must be from stdout because i'd like to pipe you

you must be London because I want to explode inside your tunnel

you must be open source because the entire fucking high school class has seen your internal workings and tinkered with them

you must be Doom 3 cause when the action starts the lights go out

you must be a black market organ harvester cause you just stole my heart

ok_ok_ok · 08-06-2007, 05:24 AM

You: excuse me did you just feel my ass? Girl: no you: why not?

Oh my god, I thought I was gay... then I met you.

You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!

You've been a bad girl. Go to my room.

DeadFidel · 08-06-2007, 05:54 AM

Too many gog searches..becoming lame...

YET THE BEST "Tested" one is:

I'm gay and need a friend.

fris · 08-06-2007, 06:04 AM

you must be a playground slide because i want to go down on you repeatedly

you must be a rodeo bull because i want to ride you for 8 seconds and then get off

i like my urls like i like my women...dirty and mangled

i must be dick cheney because i want to fire my weapon into your back

i must be the u.s. senate because i'm totally rejecting your timetable for withdrawal of my troops

you must be gasoline because even though you're pricey, I'm still going to pump you in my van

you must be Six Flag's newest roller coaster because some rednecks told me that they have been saving up their money all summer to ride you

you must be herpes because every time I think i'm rid of you, there you are on my dick

you must be real networks because i cannot get at your media without installing this ridiculous software

you must be muslim cause im jihard as hell

you must be an NES cartridge because i will blow on your slot until you start functioning

you must be a taxidermy lab because you make me want to stuff a cock in you

zeruel · 08-06-2007, 06:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cyber-Hu$tler

I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?

fusionx · 08-06-2007, 06:12 AM

(wipe your finger on your cocktail glass, touch her shoulder) We've gotta get you out of those wet clothes

You: Do you sleep on your stomach? her: (yes|no|what?) You: Mind if I do?

Did you wash those pants in lemon fresh joy? I can see myself in them.

Is it hot in here or is it just you?

techtony · 08-06-2007, 06:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by D

I'd bet nearly any amount of money you guys rarely - if ever - get laid.

Grow a pair, and move beyond the gynophobia, eh?

nah, I got that one from t-shirt hell, I don't think I've ever had to use a pick up line.

Lycanthrope · 08-06-2007, 06:42 AM

You: I think you're beautiful and I would love to spend the night with you. Would you sleep with me for a million dollars?
Her: Yes, of course
You: How about twenty-five dollars?
Her: Hell no, what do you think I am, a whore?
You: We have already established that, now we are negotiating a price...

Baal.PitBull · 08-06-2007, 06:57 AM

My all time favorite..

Nice hair. Wanna Fuck?

gingy · 08-06-2007, 07:45 AM

I think, any girl can be bought, literally this word, there would be cash

Slick · 08-06-2007, 08:08 AM

Are you from Tennessee ??

Her reply - "No, why ?"

because you're the only "Ten I See"

tranza · 08-06-2007, 08:14 AM

Lol, there are actually some nice ones in this thread.....

JerkOMatic · 08-06-2007, 09:16 AM

"Want to see what it's like to ride in the trunk of my car?!"

JerkOMatic · 08-06-2007, 09:18 AM

"Want to see what it's like to ride in the trunk of my car?!"

Brother Bilo · 08-06-2007, 09:31 AM

I've always liked.....

Giiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrl...you make my dick hard.

08-05-2007, 06:18 PM	#1
CyberHustler Masterbaiter Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 26,084	funny pickup lines....? how about you come sit on my lap and talk about the first thing that pops up... any others?

08-05-2007, 06:22 PM	#3
techtony Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 668	I"m new in town, could I have directions to your house? I may not be fred flinstone buy I can make your bed rock! __________________ The Freak and Geek Show The F&G Network The F&G Shop ICQ# 486382410

08-05-2007, 09:57 PM	#5
techtony Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 668	Hi, I make more money than you can spend. that one should get them every time. __________________ The Freak and Geek Show The F&G Network The F&G Shop ICQ# 486382410

08-05-2007, 09:59 PM	#7
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,940	You couldn't handle 10 inches __________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*

08-05-2007, 10:00 PM	#9
techtony Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 668	Hi, will you help me find my puppy, I think he went into that cheap hotel accross the street. __________________ The Freak and Geek Show The F&G Network The F&G Shop ICQ# 486382410

08-05-2007, 06:21 PM	#2
CyberHustler Masterbaiter Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 26,084	Here's another one... Are you a parking ticket? (huh?) because you got fine written all over you!

08-05-2007, 10:00 PM	#8
RawAlex So Fucking Banned Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: In a house. Posts: 9,465	" I don't know your name, but your skirt is familiar"

08-05-2007, 10:03 PM	#11
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,940	Get your ass up in the air and I'll be with you in a minute...Jack Nicholson __________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*

08-05-2007, 10:06 PM	#12
Profits of Doom Monster Rain Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Mongo Posts: 4,978	10 Psycho Pick-Up Lines 1. Didn't I see you on the grassy knoll? 2. Can I buy you a spatula? 3. Bet you're wondering why I have no nostrils. 4. Your crawlspace or mine? 5. You look like the kind of person who appreciates catheters. 6. May I lick your forehead? 7. Do you always wear your shoes over your socks? 8. Smeep. Smeep. Smeep. 9. What's your favorite flavor of wood? 10. You've stolen my heart, but I have three more back home in the freezer. __________________ “My Free Cams Affiliate Program by CrakRevenue”

08-05-2007, 10:10 PM	#13
techtony Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 668	I like my women like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freazer. __________________ The Freak and Geek Show The F&G Network The F&G Shop ICQ# 486382410

08-05-2007, 10:12 PM	#14
cashbot So Fucking Banned Join Date: Apr 2007 Posts: 325	"scream and I'll kill you"

08-05-2007, 10:13 PM	#15
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,940	How about $35? __________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*

08-05-2007, 10:17 PM	#16
CyberHustler Masterbaiter Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 26,084	Oh no, I'm choking! I need mouth to mouth, quick...! You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more...? Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why, don't you like pizza...? Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package... I heard legs was the word of the day. how bout you come back to my place and spread the word... It may look like a needle, but i works like a sewing machine baby...!

08-06-2007, 12:30 AM	#21
D Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: The Valley Posts: 7,412	You know... (:look woman from head to toe, and then back to her eyes: )... I can make you walk funny. Actually batting .250 on that one. __________________ -D. ICQ: 202-96-31

08-06-2007, 12:37 AM	#23
g$$$ Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 2,807	nice legs..what time they open?

08-06-2007, 12:44 AM	#24
Vitasoy GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 58,202	heh some of those are hilarious __________________ [email protected]

08-06-2007, 01:58 AM	#26
SexualDragon Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Canada Posts: 3,038	I love every bone in your body, especially mine __________________ Make 2009 a great year with Tiffany Preston 436-127-934

08-06-2007, 04:41 AM	#28
fris Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 55,372	you must be an astrologer because my libra is rising you must be in the kkk because i think we'll have a lot of fun once we get under the sheets you must be grand theft auto: san andreas because once i get inside of you i'm going to do all sorts of illegal things you must be herbal essences because masturbating with you is a totally organic experience you must be a 0day topsite because I just wanna max out your slots you must be an HTTP status code because all i'm getting is: 402 Payment Required you must be Frogger because I would cross rush hour traffic and cascading rivers in order to hop in your hole 6 times in a row you must be a dialup internet connection because every time i want to do something useful on the phone i have to shut you up you must be a rare warez release because after i get my hands on you, i'm going to pass you off to all of my friends you must be the warp core of the starship enterprise because if you ever start acting up i will dump you you must be a game of texas holdem cuz i just wanna go all in you must be OSX because you're beautiful and alluring but mostly worthless you must be a free porn website, because after one 10 minute visit i'll never see you again you must be internet explorer because you give me popups all the time you must be a hydroponic grow system because i cant wait to introduce my seeds you must be aol instant messenger because i'd like to see all of my buddies on you you must be haggis cause you make me want to stuff you with old meat you must be an internet forum because i am about to try and impress you using my stale in jokes from 1998 __________________ Since 1999: 69 Adult Industry awards for Best Hosting Company and professional excellence. WP Stuff

08-06-2007, 04:51 AM	#29
CyberHustler Masterbaiter Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 26,084	If I flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances are of getting head? Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus. What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper. I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?

08-06-2007, 04:52 AM	#30
bizarrejan Confirmed User Join Date: May 2006 Location: UK Posts: 1,487	some idiot once used this on me, "can i kiss you where you wee" obviously was going to kiss the toilet,

08-06-2007, 05:07 AM	#31
fris Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 55,372	you must be a drow elf sorceress because you have cast level 3 ensnare on my heart did you install back orifice 2000 on me because you just caused my cd tray to eject you must be alan greenspan because you have just raised my interest rate by several percentage points you must be a sata2 hard drive because you are modestly increasing my pipe you must be a .bin with no .cue file because I have to wrangle with you for hours only be burned in the end you must be java bytecode because you let me use you anywhere I want you must be a microsoft product because when i find your holes i'm going to exploit them you must be internet explorer because you give me popups all the time you must be charles barkley because i want to take you to the hole but i doubt you would be impressed with my full-court press you must be an o'reilly technical manual because despite your high price tag, you never say anything meaningful you must be from stdout because i'd like to pipe you you must be London because I want to explode inside your tunnel you must be open source because the entire fucking high school class has seen your internal workings and tinkered with them you must be Doom 3 cause when the action starts the lights go out you must be a black market organ harvester cause you just stole my heart __________________ Since 1999: 69 Adult Industry awards for Best Hosting Company and professional excellence. WP Stuff

08-06-2007, 05:24 AM	#32
ok_ok_ok Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 135	You: excuse me did you just feel my ass? Girl: no you: why not? Oh my god, I thought I was gay... then I met you. You know the more I drink, the prettier you get! You've been a bad girl. Go to my room.

08-06-2007, 05:54 AM	#33
DeadFidel Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: This was my wife circa 2002 Posts: 6,760	Too many gog searches..becoming lame... YET THE BEST "Tested" one is: I'm gay and need a friend.

08-06-2007, 06:04 AM	#34
fris Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 55,372	you must be a playground slide because i want to go down on you repeatedly you must be a rodeo bull because i want to ride you for 8 seconds and then get off i like my urls like i like my women...dirty and mangled i must be dick cheney because i want to fire my weapon into your back i must be the u.s. senate because i'm totally rejecting your timetable for withdrawal of my troops you must be gasoline because even though you're pricey, I'm still going to pump you in my van you must be Six Flag's newest roller coaster because some rednecks told me that they have been saving up their money all summer to ride you you must be herpes because every time I think i'm rid of you, there you are on my dick you must be real networks because i cannot get at your media without installing this ridiculous software you must be muslim cause im jihard as hell you must be an NES cartridge because i will blow on your slot until you start functioning you must be a taxidermy lab because you make me want to stuff a cock in you __________________ Since 1999: 69 Adult Industry awards for Best Hosting Company and professional excellence. WP Stuff

08-06-2007, 06:12 AM	#36
fusionx Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Olongapo City, Philippines Posts: 4,618	(wipe your finger on your cocktail glass, touch her shoulder) We've gotta get you out of those wet clothes You: Do you sleep on your stomach? her: (yes\|no\|what?) You: Mind if I do? Did you wash those pants in lemon fresh joy? I can see myself in them. Is it hot in here or is it just you?

08-06-2007, 06:42 AM	#38
Lycanthrope Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Wisconsin Posts: 4,517	You: I think you're beautiful and I would love to spend the night with you. Would you sleep with me for a million dollars? Her: Yes, of course You: How about twenty-five dollars? Her: Hell no, what do you think I am, a whore? You: We have already established that, now we are negotiating a price... __________________

08-06-2007, 06:57 AM	#39
Baal.PitBull Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: In my house Posts: 205	My all time favorite.. Nice hair. Wanna Fuck?

08-06-2007, 07:45 AM	#40
gingy Registered User Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 58	I think, any girl can be bought, literally this word, there would be cash __________________ Nude teens ftv girls

08-06-2007, 08:08 AM	#41
Slick Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Houghton, MI Posts: 7,338	Are you from Tennessee ?? Her reply - "No, why ?" because you're the only "Ten I See"

08-06-2007, 08:14 AM	#42
tranza ICQ: 197-556-237 Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: BRASIL !!! Posts: 57,559	Lol, there are actually some nice ones in this thread..... __________________ I'm just a newbie.

08-06-2007, 09:16 AM	#43
JerkOMatic Registered User Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Boynton Beach, FL Posts: 33	"Want to see what it's like to ride in the trunk of my car?!"

08-06-2007, 09:18 AM	#44
JerkOMatic Registered User Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Boynton Beach, FL Posts: 33	"Want to see what it's like to ride in the trunk of my car?!"

08-06-2007, 09:31 AM	#45
Brother Bilo Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: I live in cage Posts: 4,193	I've always liked..... Giiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrl...you make my dick hard. __________________