If your cute Russian roommate offered you 15k to marry her... - Page 3 - GoFuckYourself.com

datatank · 05-08-2008, 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by slavdogg

see, now u know why i've always encouraged u to talk your ideas out in the open.

I got it.
here is the plan
We do the bar in AZ.

My name is Boris.
I'm a trust fund baby that likes women that cook.
I take her for a test drive til i get paid or i get sick of her and conveniently run off to Mexico leaving you with a vodka bar.

I sale mexican hideout

O MARINA · 05-08-2008, 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by datatank

You want to touch her cookie?

For the record everyone, LL is still The ' one touch cocki '

LauraLee · 05-08-2008, 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZ_Sarah_Maxcash

Lauralee ... a "wine cooler" drinker? Lmao...

LL~What was the bottle count on that last night in Florida ... me, you, Tina & the taxicab ride to 7-11?

Holy crap, to be honest, when the cab came to pick us up.. because we needed MORE alcohol, we took care of business on 5 bottles of red.

I wish I had the recording we left on Wolfies cell phone when we accidently drunk dialed and were discussing hookers.

Please do not repeat this at home folks. The participants involved are all well trained professionals.

O MARINA · 05-08-2008, 03:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by datatank

I sale mexican hideout

It's a good thing I know where you live.

slavdogg · 05-08-2008, 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by datatank

I sale mexican hideout

i dont believe u
twice i stopped by for a drink in the past year,
knocked on your door and no one was home.

have u ever taken a tour bus from the airport ?

O MARINA · 05-08-2008, 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LauraLee

drunk dialed and were discussing hookers.

The participants involved are all well trained professionals.

Slav
We won't let these Americans drink on the house

LauraLee · 05-08-2008, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by O MARINA

Slav
We won't let these Americans drink on the house

I wouldn't let us eat on the house either, if you are serving corndogs and cornish hens.

(that one is for you truckie! xoxo)

slavdogg · 05-08-2008, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by O MARINA

Slav
We won't let these Americans drink on the house

only under the bar

AZSarah · 05-08-2008, 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LauraLee

Holy crap, to be honest, when the cab came to pick us up.. because we needed MORE alcohol, we took care of business on 5 bottles of red.

I wish I had the recording we left on Wolfies cell phone when we accidently drunk dialed and were discussing hookers.

Please do not repeat this at home folks. The participants involved are all well trained professionals.

Where are the pics from that night that I took?
Neither you nor Truckie remembered me taking them when you found them the next day on the cam!

They were almost as good as this one ...

datatank · 05-08-2008, 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by slavdogg

i dont believe u
twice i stopped by for a drink in the past year,
knocked on your door and no one was home.

have u ever taken a tour bus from the airport ?

Only once. Is brutal

LauraLee · 05-08-2008, 03:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZ_Sarah_Maxcash

Where are the pics from that night that I took?
Neither you nor Truckie remembered me taking them when you found them the next day on the cam!

They were almost as good as this one ...

I can't stop laughing, do you see my teeth are PURPLE from the wine

That's class.

Look at 'blackstripe' hiding her global goddess identity with the black hat!

I am looking for those pics now... Ahhhhhhhhhh GREAT times.

slavdogg · 05-08-2008, 03:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by datatank

Only once. Is brutal

was a there a chick with a hip replacement who likes to tivo her shows and needed xmas shopping ideas ?

O MARINA · 05-08-2008, 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by datatank

Only once. Is brutal

city tourist with hip problem

J$tyle$ · 05-08-2008, 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by datatank

You want to touch her cookie?

If there are no retired cockroaches that have come to die - I'll look but won't touch.

Kard63 · 05-08-2008, 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LauraLee

This wasn't the mail order deal, this was a Russian stripper that wanted citizenship and didn't mind spending her twat money to get it

Well, if she is willing to spread her twat and eat twat give her my icq

tony286 · 05-08-2008, 05:42 PM

the key is dont fuck your room mate.

CarlosTheGaucho · 05-09-2008, 05:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by J$tyle$

If I wasn't married and straight - I'd fly to NYC just to have dinner with you!

Thanks for the support and encouragement, I am sentenced to polygamy already..

Angry Jew Cat - Banned for Life · 05-09-2008, 05:34 AM

Ask her if she wants to be a Canadian, I'll do it for $100, a daily blowjob and some perogies...

Drake · 05-09-2008, 05:44 AM

Give me her digits and measurements. I'll see what I can do for her.

Jens Van Assterdam · 05-09-2008, 05:59 AM

Why do most americans have room mates anyway? Isnt it pain in the ass to live with a couple of gringos in one house?

$15k for a marriage... mhh for $15k i get an unused russian bride delievered to my door step. Maybe even 2 at the same time. Let me call Bronco..

O MARINA · 05-09-2008, 06:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by marketsmart

see, this is what happens when you have a fucking piano in the house....

i would put that hammer and sickle bitch in the piano and throw it in the pool...

that is of course after i put some ciggarettes out on her face....

Here you go Sarah ^
Alpha male, type A
and SOoo romantic lol

Pornopat · 05-09-2008, 06:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZ_Sarah_Maxcash

would you do it?

A friend of mine found a roommate online, she moves in & within a couple of months they are hooking up.
Next thing he knows she tries to do the instant relationship thing with him.
When he tells her he doesn't want to be tied down, she pulls the old pregnancy scare.
When that ends up being nothing she goes psycho every time he talks to another woman or goes out.
When he tells her to move she changes her attitude & tries to be nice again, then makes him a "business" proposition... she will pay him 15 grand to marry her so she can get her citizenship.
He tells her no, she proceeds to make life hell, throws rocks in the pool, puts cigarettes out in his hats & in the pool, plays the piano really loudly in the middle of the night

etc etc.

Is this the new age of the reverse mail order bride? I mean she obviously planned it all along & would rather do it this way & pick the guy she likes ... weird eh?
Anyone hear of this before?

Depends. What is she playing on the piano?

O MARINA · 05-09-2008, 06:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pornopat

Depends. What is she playing on the piano?

Beethoven

pay attention!!

Sarah_Jayne · 05-09-2008, 06:45 AM

My freshman year roommate was a Russian girl who had lived in Japan for a few years after her parents left Russia after the coup. She was seriously insane but only showed it to me. Everybody else thought she was sweet but she would watch me sleep and weird out things like that. I found out because she came in one night and I was in the weird half sleep zone and she leaned over me and goes 'I know you aren't sleeping'. So, of course I pretended to be asleep.

s9ann0 · 05-09-2008, 07:12 AM

yikes these girls are crazy be carefull! I wouldn't try and do a fake marriage I mean I know people with legit marriages who have had a hard enough time with immigration

CarlosTheGaucho · 05-09-2008, 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZ_Sarah_Maxcash

Where are the pics from that night that I took?
Neither you nor Truckie remembered me taking them when you found them the next day on the cam!

They were almost as good as this one ...

hilarious

sextoyking · 05-09-2008, 09:15 AM

Great thread

AZSarah · 05-09-2008, 09:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tony404

the key is dont fuck your room mate.

E X A C T L Y!

AZSarah · 05-09-2008, 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sarah_MaxCash

My freshman year roommate was a Russian girl who had lived in Japan for a few years after her parents left Russia after the coup. She was seriously insane but only showed it to me. Everybody else thought she was sweet but she would watch me sleep and weird out things like that. I found out because she came in one night and I was in the weird half sleep zone and she leaned over me and goes 'I know you aren't sleeping'. So, of course I pretended to be asleep.

Ok, that is totally creepy.

And I hear you on the sweet part, I have met this chick a few times and really liked her and thought she was great & told him how he lucked out on the roommate he found.

(I also warned him in advance not to bang her because it would ruin everything, but oh well!)

Twisted Dave · 05-09-2008, 09:23 AM

Tell him to leave the property. She'll be stuck with rent :D

AZSarah · 05-09-2008, 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PunchBunny Dave

Tell him to leave the property. She'll be stuck with rent :D

It's his house! Haha, his mortgage, so that won't work.

He told her to move out, she is supposed to be gone this weekend.

montel · 05-09-2008, 10:35 AM

why are there so many stories of russian chicks being insane?

Holly · 05-09-2008, 10:43 AM

- old school looks [I dress like Vanilla Ice.]
- sensitive on request [A pussy.]
- artistically inclined and seriously educated [Unemployed.]
- impress the society with your new husband! if you want to lead a conversation about something that sounds smart, whether it will be politics, history, popular culture or vintage porn, I am tough to match! [I want to be a kept man.]
-trilingual [I know "yes" and "hello" in Spanish.]
- std proof and very passionate, there are no boundaries in what we can do together! ( boy girl, group only, no bi or gay) [I'm a virgin.]
- reliable and not expensive to maintain [Liar.]
- used to work out in the past [Fat.]
- cynicism, sarcasm, irony included [I laugh at my own jokes. No one else does.]
- a free trial in NYC, a dinner for two included [Make sure you bring your wallet.]

pornbling · 05-09-2008, 10:46 AM

I would marry her If I wanted to get Russian citizenship and 15K

Ivan Fuckalot · 05-09-2008, 10:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZ_Sarah_Maxcash

It's his house! Haha, his mortgage, so that won't work.

He told her to move out, she is supposed to be gone this weekend.

Does he need a new roomate?

O MARINA · 05-09-2008, 12:22 PM

holly lol

Sarah_Jayne · 05-09-2008, 12:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZ_Sarah_Maxcash

Ok, that is totally creepy.

And I hear you on the sweet part, I have met this chick a few times and really liked her and thought she was great & told him how he lucked out on the roommate he found.

(I also warned him in advance not to bang her because it would ruin everything, but oh well!)

She is the reason I read the school handbook and found out that if you roommate died you got straight A's.

WiredGuy · 05-09-2008, 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZ_Sarah_Maxcash

It's his house! Haha, his mortgage, so that won't work.

He told her to move out, she is supposed to be gone this weekend.

I'd call INS on her ass, chances are she's not even legal. If she is, by the time INS releases her, he can have her stuff on the street to pickup and change the locks.
WG

scarlettcontent · 05-09-2008, 12:36 PM

hell no

LauraLee · 05-09-2008, 12:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sarah_MaxCash

She is the reason I read the school handbook and found out that if you roommate died you got straight A's.

Wait. If your roommate dies you get straight A's????
Geez, that seems like an open invitation for murder, for a sick fuck too lazy to study themselves.

Kard63 · 05-09-2008, 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jens Van Assterdam

Why do most americans have room mates anyway? Isnt it pain in the ass to live with a couple of gringos in one house?

$15k for a marriage... mhh for $15k i get an unused russian bride delievered to my door step. Maybe even 2 at the same time. Let me call Bronco..

How do we arrange this?

CarlosTheGaucho · 05-09-2008, 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Holly

- old school looks [I dress like Vanilla Ice.]
- sensitive on request [A pussy.]
- artistically inclined and seriously educated [Unemployed.]
- impress the society with your new husband! if you want to lead a conversation about something that sounds smart, whether it will be politics, history, popular culture or vintage porn, I am tough to match! [I want to be a kept man.]
-trilingual [I know "yes" and "hello" in Spanish.]
- std proof and very passionate, there are no boundaries in what we can do together! ( boy girl, group only, no bi or gay) [I'm a virgin.]
- reliable and not expensive to maintain [Liar.]
- used to work out in the past [Fat.]
- cynicism, sarcasm, irony included [I laugh at my own jokes. No one else does.]
- a free trial in NYC, a dinner for two included [Make sure you bring your wallet.]

How funny,

Did you just described someone you know the best?

Sarah_Jayne · 05-09-2008, 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LauraLee

Wait. If your roommate dies you get straight A's????
Geez, that seems like an open invitation for murder, for a sick fuck too lazy to study themselves.

Yup, it was in the book and then years later after I found that there was a movie based on that premises. I can't remember the name of the movie but I remember noticing when it came out because I had found that page in the handbook and thought it strange. I am fairly sure if you are charged with the murder they may void it..lol

MaDalton · 05-11-2008, 01:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by O MARINA

who?

MaDalton ? J/K

ssssshhhhhhhh!!! i burried the bitch in the backyard after the money was spent

but i'm still into russian strippers

MaDalton · 05-11-2008, 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by O MARINA

Her vagine is where retired cockroaches come to die.

do you kiss your mom with that mouth???

O MARINA · 05-11-2008, 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MaDalton

do you kiss your mom with that mouth???

lol

do you kiss the Russian strippers ??

starpimps · 05-11-2008, 02:55 PM

sounds like a grade A succubus

MaDalton · 05-11-2008, 03:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by O MARINA

lol

do you kiss the Russian strippers ??

if they say "please" - maybe.

TMM_Vlad · 05-11-2008, 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZ_Sarah_Maxcash

would you do it?

A friend of mine found a roommate online, she moves in & within a couple of months they are hooking up.
Next thing he knows she tries to do the instant relationship thing with him.
When he tells her he doesn't want to be tied down, she pulls the old pregnancy scare.
When that ends up being nothing she goes psycho every time he talks to another woman or goes out.
When he tells her to move she changes her attitude & tries to be nice again, then makes him a "business" proposition... she will pay him 15 grand to marry her so she can get her citizenship.
He tells her no, she proceeds to make life hell, throws rocks in the pool, puts cigarettes out in his hats & in the pool, plays the piano really loudly in the middle of the night

etc etc.

Is this the new age of the reverse mail order bride? I mean she obviously planned it all along & would rather do it this way & pick the guy she likes ... weird eh?
Anyone hear of this before?

Shes Russian right?

MaDalton · 05-11-2008, 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by barslut

Shes Russian right?

you're genius, right?

05-09-2008, 05:59 AM	#120
Jens Van Assterdam The Dupre Pimp Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Koh Samui Posts: 6,677	Why do most americans have room mates anyway? Isnt it pain in the ass to live with a couple of gringos in one house? $15k for a marriage... mhh for $15k i get an unused russian bride delievered to my door step. Maybe even 2 at the same time. Let me call Bronco.. __________________ Read TOS for signature rules

05-09-2008, 09:15 AM	#127
sextoyking Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Portland, OR. Posts: 6,034	Great thread __________________ ICQ: 52344098 -------------------------------------- 50% Commissions on all Product Sales. http://www.wishing.com/money

05-09-2008, 09:23 AM	#130
Twisted Dave Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 3,635	Tell him to leave the property. She'll be stuck with rent :D __________________ Custom Cartoon Mascots - ICQ: 243355699, Email: [email protected] or Click Sig - 15% referrals. Send me clients, make money!

05-09-2008, 10:35 AM	#132
montel Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: See sig! Posts: 2,606	why are there so many stories of russian chicks being insane? __________________ Barefootsies

05-09-2008, 10:43 AM	#133
Holly Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Jesusland Posts: 10,017	- old school looks [I dress like Vanilla Ice.] - sensitive on request [A pussy.] - artistically inclined and seriously educated [Unemployed.] - impress the society with your new husband! if you want to lead a conversation about something that sounds smart, whether it will be politics, history, popular culture or vintage porn, I am tough to match! [I want to be a kept man.] -trilingual [I know "yes" and "hello" in Spanish.] - std proof and very passionate, there are no boundaries in what we can do together! ( boy girl, group only, no bi or gay) [I'm a virgin.] - reliable and not expensive to maintain [Liar.] - used to work out in the past [Fat.] - cynicism, sarcasm, irony included [I laugh at my own jokes. No one else does.] - a free trial in NYC, a dinner for two included [Make sure you bring your wallet.] __________________ War National Damn Champions Eagle

05-08-2008, 05:42 PM	#116
tony286 lurker Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: atlanta Posts: 57,021	the key is dont fuck your room mate.

05-09-2008, 05:34 AM	#118
Angry Jew Cat - Banned for Life (felis madjewicus) Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: In Mom & Dad's Basement Posts: 20,368	Ask her if she wants to be a Canadian, I'll do it for $100, a daily blowjob and some perogies...

05-09-2008, 05:44 AM	#119
Drake Hello world! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 12,508	Give me her digits and measurements. I'll see what I can do for her.

05-09-2008, 06:45 AM	#124
Sarah_Jayne Now with more Jayne Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 40,077	My freshman year roommate was a Russian girl who had lived in Japan for a few years after her parents left Russia after the coup. She was seriously insane but only showed it to me. Everybody else thought she was sweet but she would watch me sleep and weird out things like that. I found out because she came in one night and I was in the weird half sleep zone and she leaned over me and goes 'I know you aren't sleeping'. So, of course I pretended to be asleep.

05-09-2008, 07:12 AM	#125
s9ann0 Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Boston Posts: 4,873	yikes these girls are crazy be carefull! I wouldn't try and do a fake marriage I mean I know people with legit marriages who have had a hard enough time with immigration

05-09-2008, 10:46 AM	#134
pornbling Registered User Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: underground Posts: 251	I would marry her If I wanted to get Russian citizenship and 15K

05-09-2008, 12:22 PM	#136
O MARINA I'm clockin' ya, Versace shade watchin' ya Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: internet Posts: 13,795	holly lol Last edited by O MARINA; 05-09-2008 at 12:24 PM..

05-09-2008, 12:36 PM	#139
scarlettcontent www.scarlettcontent.net Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Pleiades Posts: 6,031	hell no __________________ Scarlett Content - Adult Content Provider - High Quality Adult Stock Content for your Websites, Mobile Media and Print. Over 3 Million Images (14,000 photo sets) over 5000 Videos - Many Niches, US-2257, Awesome Prices. Over 40 years in the adult industry. [email protected] Follow us on twitter.

05-11-2008, 02:55 PM	#147
starpimps Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: internets Posts: 6,954	sounds like a grade A succubus __________________ Teen Porn Models / Solo Girls