7 Signs That You?ve Given Up on Getting Laid - GoFuckYourself.com

cthulhu_waves · 07-20-2010, 12:25 PM

Chris Lathrop wrote this hilarious piece and I thought it's worth sharing to you pervs here.

Quote:

When you boil a man down to his core essence, the desire to get laid drives everything. Without it, there is no motivation to excel, succeed or be relevant. Whether or not he actually gets laid isn?t important. Even a married man who has no interest in bedding down other women must possess this desire, otherwise he will surely lapse into the abyss of a nondescript existence, a fate that is absolutely worse than death. Here are seven telltale signs that you?ve simply given up on impressing the opposite sex, and thus, given up on life. If any of these pertain to you, do something about it. Now.

Read the Seven Signs here.

CaptainHowdy · 07-20-2010, 12:39 PM

I would put the pee stains around the toilet as the first and most important sign of them all...

sortie · 07-20-2010, 12:41 PM

I think there is only one sign :

Surfing GFY all day.

BlackCrayon · 07-20-2010, 12:42 PM

the south park tiger woods episode was pretty funny in regards to this "you mean a man would actually try to be successful just so he can sleep with many women?" lol

CaptainHowdy · 07-20-2010, 12:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sortie

I think there is only one sign :

Surfing GFY all day.

That would be the second most important sign for me...

seeandsee · 07-20-2010, 12:49 PM

when i am full of food, i cant think about it

Jarmusch · 07-20-2010, 12:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CaptainHowdy

I would put the pee stains around the toilet as the first and most important sign of them all...

This is why I've been sitting down to pee at home for a long time.

However, I failed on the very first sign. I have a pair of sneakers that stay on with two strips of velcro.

JD · 07-20-2010, 12:51 PM

wow that's a fucking stupid blog post lol

CaptainHowdy · 07-20-2010, 12:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jarmusch

This is why I've been sitting down to pee at home for a long time.

I do that every once in a while just to spice things up...

sortie · 07-20-2010, 12:55 PM

But the most clear sign of giving up is when people can make songs out of your
phone conversations :

JFK · 07-20-2010, 01:03 PM

?so would you be open to an afternoon movie and you sucking my cock afterward?

07-20-2010, 01:12 PM

as mystery said, nature will unappologetically weed your genes out of existance!

Jarmusch · 07-20-2010, 01:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CaptainHowdy

I do that every once in a while just to spice things up...

I do it mostly because I'm too lazy to clean the aftermath.

Also, peeing sitting down is a nice rest from sitting in front of the computer all day.

gmr324 · 07-20-2010, 01:33 PM

That reminds me of the Seinfeld episode with George wearning elastic band sweatpants!
Funny stuff!

CYF · 07-20-2010, 04:23 PM

that blog post sucked.

CurrentlySober · 07-20-2010, 04:29 PM

I piss in the handbasin. Its a better height and has a wider area

CDSmith · 07-20-2010, 04:40 PM

Wow, was I ever surprised to find I'm not guilty of any of those things.

Btw, who is Chris Laptop?

cam_girls · 07-20-2010, 05:04 PM

I just got used to standing in a puddle of urine

GrouchyAdmin · 07-20-2010, 05:48 PM

Oddly enough, I've only got one of those, and I don't even bother dealing with people unless I have to. The test is askew.

fatfoo · 07-20-2010, 06:28 PM

I would say it's the desire to survive, not desire not get laid.

kane · 07-20-2010, 06:34 PM

Luckily I only resemble one of them. The paper and plastic thing. It is summer, I grill a lot and make sandwiches a lot so I use paper plates a lot. The girlfriend doesn't seem to mind.

BJ · 07-20-2010, 06:36 PM

scabs on your pee pee

pornmasta · 07-20-2010, 06:39 PM

yes but no...

http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures...rted-35309.jpg

pornmasta · 07-20-2010, 06:42 PM

Also i you find god you can have sex with thess 7 signs (yes to create son of god)...

tiger · 07-21-2010, 02:48 PM

Some of those are pretty funny but some are stupid.

Anyway if you are rich or famous you can do every single thing on that list and still get laid more than you could ever want I'm sure.

mynameisjim · 07-21-2010, 02:56 PM

Sort of funny, but oddly enough, the guys I know who pick up the most women are pretty disgusting with their living habits. The clean I guys I know almost always go home empty handed. Go figure.

A lot of it is attitude and how you carry yourself. If you look a little too put together, that's sort of a turn off for women.

_Richard_ · 07-21-2010, 03:00 PM

i was in the clear till girlfriend was removing my sandals, and i heard the horrible sound of velcro and thought to myself 'that's the first fucking sign!'

CDSmith · 07-21-2010, 07:19 PM

I was poor and never got laid.
Then I got rich, and the girls started coming around
I asked them "where were you when I was fucking poor?"
So I still
never get laid.

The Porn Nerd · 07-21-2010, 09:54 PM

I'm so lonely...

07-20-2010, 12:39 PM	#2
CaptainHowdy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Happy in the dark. Posts: 93,153	I would put the pee stains around the toilet as the first and most important sign of them all... __________________ FLASH SALE INSANITY! deal with a 100% Trusted Seller Buy Traffic Spots on a High-Quality Network 1 Year or Lifetime — That’s Right, Until the Internet Explodes!

07-20-2010, 12:41 PM	#3
sortie Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 7,771	I think there is only one sign : Surfing GFY all day. __________________

07-20-2010, 12:42 PM	#4
BlackCrayon Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Ottawa Posts: 19,631	the south park tiger woods episode was pretty funny in regards to this "you mean a man would actually try to be successful just so he can sleep with many women?" lol __________________ you don't know you're wearing a leash if you sit by the peg all day..

07-20-2010, 12:49 PM	#6
seeandsee Check SIG! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Europe (Skype: gojkoas) Posts: 50,945	when i am full of food, i cant think about it __________________ BUY MY SIG - 50$/Year Contact here

07-20-2010, 12:55 PM	#10
sortie Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 7,771	But the most clear sign of giving up is when people can make songs out of your phone conversations : __________________

07-20-2010, 12:51 PM	#8
JD Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 22,651	wow that's a fucking stupid blog post lol

07-20-2010, 01:03 PM	#11
JFK FUBAR the ORIGINATOR Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: FUBARLAND Posts: 67,374	?so would you be open to an afternoon movie and you sucking my cock afterward? __________________ FUBAR Webmasters - The FUBAR Times - FUBAR Webmasters Mobile - FUBARTV.XXX For promo opps contact jfk at fubarwebmasters dot com

07-20-2010, 01:12 PM	#12
Altwebdesign Guest Posts: n/a	as mystery said, nature will unappologetically weed your genes out of existance!

07-20-2010, 01:33 PM	#14
gmr324 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,199	That reminds me of the Seinfeld episode with George wearning elastic band sweatpants! Funny stuff!

07-20-2010, 04:23 PM	#15
CYF Coupon Guru Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Minneapolis Posts: 10,973	that blog post sucked. __________________ Webmaster Coupons Coupons and discounts for hosting, domains, SSL Certs, and more! AmeriNOC Coupons \| Certified Hosting Coupons \| Hosting Coupons \| Domain Name Coupons

07-20-2010, 04:29 PM	#16
CurrentlySober Too lazy to wipe my ass Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: A Public Bathroom Posts: 38,549	I piss in the handbasin. Its a better height and has a wider area __________________ My AI Handywork... My Dream Gal... XXX 👁️ 👍️ 💩

07-20-2010, 04:40 PM	#17
CDSmith Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: May 2001 Location: My network is hosted at TECHIEMEDIA.net ...Wait, you meant where am I located at? Oh... okay, I'm in Winnipeg, Canada. Oops. :) Posts: 51,460	Wow, was I ever surprised to find I'm not guilty of any of those things. Btw, who is Chris Laptop? __________________ *Promote Wildmatch, ImLive, Sexier.com, and more!!* ALWAYS THE HIGHEST PAYOUTS: Big Bux/ImLive SIGNUP ON NOW!!! Put some PUSSYCA$H in your pocket. ICQ me at: 31024634

07-20-2010, 05:04 PM	#18
cam_girls So Fucking Banned Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 2,968	I just got used to standing in a puddle of urine

07-20-2010, 05:48 PM	#19
GrouchyAdmin Now choke yourself! Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 12,085	Oddly enough, I've only got one of those, and I don't even bother dealing with people unless I have to. The test is askew. __________________ AIM: GrouchyGfy

07-20-2010, 06:28 PM	#20
fatfoo ICQ:649699063 Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 27,763	I would say it's the desire to survive, not desire not get laid. __________________ Send me an email: [email protected]

07-20-2010, 06:34 PM	#21
kane Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: portland, OR Posts: 20,684	Luckily I only resemble one of them. The paper and plastic thing. It is summer, I grill a lot and make sandwiches a lot so I use paper plates a lot. The girlfriend doesn't seem to mind.

07-20-2010, 06:36 PM	#22
BJ Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: asia Posts: 5,590	scabs on your pee pee

07-20-2010, 06:39 PM	#23
pornmasta Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 19,029	yes but no... http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures...rted-35309.jpg

07-20-2010, 06:42 PM	#24
pornmasta Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 19,029	Also i you find god you can have sex with thess 7 signs (yes to create son of god)...

07-21-2010, 02:48 PM	#25
tiger Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 6,986	Some of those are pretty funny but some are stupid. Anyway if you are rich or famous you can do every single thing on that list and still get laid more than you could ever want I'm sure. __________________

07-21-2010, 02:56 PM	#26
mynameisjim Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 2,985	Sort of funny, but oddly enough, the guys I know who pick up the most women are pretty disgusting with their living habits. The clean I guys I know almost always go home empty handed. Go figure. A lot of it is attitude and how you carry yourself. If you look a little too put together, that's sort of a turn off for women. __________________ jim (at) amateursconvert . com Amateurs Convert

07-21-2010, 03:00 PM	#27
_Richard_ Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Vancouver Posts: 30,985	i was in the clear till girlfriend was removing my sandals, and i heard the horrible sound of velcro and thought to myself 'that's the first fucking sign!'

07-21-2010, 07:19 PM	#28
CDSmith Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: May 2001 Location: My network is hosted at TECHIEMEDIA.net ...Wait, you meant where am I located at? Oh... okay, I'm in Winnipeg, Canada. Oops. :) Posts: 51,460	I was poor and never got laid. Then I got rich, and the girls started coming around I asked them "where were you when I was fucking poor?" So I still never get laid. __________________ *Promote Wildmatch, ImLive, Sexier.com, and more!!* ALWAYS THE HIGHEST PAYOUTS: Big Bux/ImLive SIGNUP ON NOW!!! Put some PUSSYCA$H in your pocket. ICQ me at: 31024634

07-21-2010, 09:54 PM	#29
The Porn Nerd Living The Dream Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Inside a Monitor Posts: 19,532	I'm so lonely... __________________ My Affiliate Programs: Porn Nerd Cash \| Porn Showcase \| Aggressive Gold Over 90 paysites to promote! Now on Teams: peabodymedia