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Old 12-29-2020, 11:16 PM   #1
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Dad Passing Away!

December 15th, I am trying to cope during the Holidays how can others deal with this tragedy. Still waiting for him to call to hear his voice that will never come. Sorry to Vent!
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Old 12-30-2020, 01:34 AM   #2
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Old 12-30-2020, 03:23 AM   #3
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That's horrid news - Nothing I can say will make you feel better - You are meant to be sad - Celebrate his life and his achievements, be the best person you can be and make him proud...
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Old 12-30-2020, 07:27 AM   #4
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Old 12-30-2020, 07:39 AM   #5
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Good Call !

Sorry to hear about your dad
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Old 12-30-2020, 07:42 AM   #6
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Very sorry to hear this. I can say you will never get over losing him. He will live on in your memory though. Like Eddy said, celebrate his life and the time you had together.
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Old 12-30-2020, 08:18 AM   #7
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Old 12-30-2020, 11:33 AM   #8
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That sucks! I lost my dad too. The only thing that helps is time.
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Old 12-30-2020, 01:27 PM   #9
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I'm so sorry. This year you will just get through it. Next year will wreck you.

Now that the anniversary has passed I am getting back control of my mind. I was consumed with thoughts of my mom for a whole month leading up to the anniversary of her death. I really thought something was wrong with me. If I was not doing something, my mind was consumed with visions, thoughts, words.

It's gut-wrenching, and I don't have good advice, but I do have sympathy. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Hugss
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Old 12-30-2020, 01:42 PM   #10
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I get it. My mom passed on the 14th.

Was not close to her by a long shot but still. It creeps up on you some times.
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Old 12-30-2020, 02:28 PM   #11
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VERY sorry to hear about your Dad!
This year has been the worst for so many people.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MakeMeGrrrrowl View Post
I'm so sorry. This year you will just get through it. Next year will wreck you.

Now that the anniversary has passed I am getting back control of my mind. I was consumed with thoughts of my mom for a whole month leading up to the anniversary of her death. I really thought something was wrong with me. If I was not doing something, my mind was consumed with visions, thoughts, words.

It's gut-wrenching, and I don't have good advice, but I do have sympathy. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Hugss
You know my recent situation so I feel for you, I really do. NOT looking forward to next year's reminders at all. But time does make things a bit easier, for all of us. Hang in there!

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I get it. My mom passed on the 14th.

Was not close to her by a long shot but still. It creeps up on you some times.
So sorry to hear about your mom. Doesn't really matter how close you were/were not she's still your mom so you are going to feel it. You hang in there too!
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Old 12-30-2020, 05:23 PM   #12
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December 15th, I am trying to cope during the Holidays how can others deal with this tragedy. Still waiting for him to call to hear his voice that will never come. Sorry to Vent!
It's going to happen to us all ... Especially my mom when I work a 12hr day.. and ya make that daily phone call to her saying "I'm home".. and that phone call to her is not a option anymore.

I'm getting all emotional right now thinking about it and it's going to happen soon ma-man.

If I can be so bold.. neuter yourself in to thinking he said "fuck it all" im outta here and it's up to you too take over shit ---

It will save your sanity ... I've seen grown men mentally bust apart.. turned to alcoholism and to this day they never mentally recovered over their parents deaths ...

and by the way.. my estranged dad passed away and to this day I have no idea where he is buried ...


Sorry for your loss
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Old 12-30-2020, 05:28 PM   #13
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I lost my father in February after a long illness. It's rough. You have my condolences.
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Old 12-30-2020, 05:55 PM   #14
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That's horrid news - Nothing I can say will make you feel better - You are meant to be sad - Celebrate his life and his achievements, be the best person you can be and make him proud...
How can you make a dead person proud? I'm puzzled.
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Old 12-30-2020, 06:27 PM   #15
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My mom died on the 23rd of December; I know it has messed with a few of my siblings 9 years later.

Condolences
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Old 12-30-2020, 07:27 PM   #16
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My mom died on the 23rd of December; I know it has messed with a few of my siblings 9 years later.

Condolences
Terrible time to lose a loved one. My step sister just lost her father December 26th. I'm pretty sure it's going to forever change how she feels about this time of year.
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Old 12-30-2020, 07:34 PM   #17
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How can you make a dead person proud? I'm puzzled.
So then you don't believe in Heaven and God and all that stuff I presume?

In that case, you still might be able to accomplish the above, and why not try just in case?
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Old 12-30-2020, 08:11 PM   #18
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So then you don't believe in Heaven and God and all that stuff I presume?
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Old 12-30-2020, 08:40 PM   #19
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lost my pops in 2013 sorry 2 hear...

(btw he was the ladies man of all don juans, he was always shaggin women!)
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Old 12-30-2020, 08:40 PM   #20
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but heart felt sorry!
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Old 12-31-2020, 03:41 AM   #21
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As somebody else, said, the only thing that heals the hurt is time.

I find it very hard to deal with death. My dad died nearly 25 years ago and sometimes when he's in a dream and I wake up, and realize he's dead, it still hurts - like being told again he's died.

My mother is 88 and recently got through cancer. Can't visit her because I'm 1,000 miles away and quarantines for travellers.

People who say that 'death is part of life' etc, I know you're trying to console the OP here, but it's not part of life, it's an abomination that shows how cruel and heartless nature is. If twenty years ago we had pumped the money we are spending on Covid (or losing due to lockdowns) on longevity research, we might have conquered aging by now. Even now, without decent funding and with the FDA still not classifying aging as a disease, we are close to being able to rejuvenate the thymus - which would have saved millions of old people from Covid.
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Old 12-31-2020, 04:19 AM   #22
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It's been 3 years since i lost my mum to alzheimers...I know for a fact i haven't been the same person since.

And i suspect i never will. We had a bond which you couldn't ever put a price on. As an adult with no kids my aim at this time of year every year was simply to make sure my mum had a good Christmas etc. That was my only focus.

Now that that focus is gone nothing is the same and never will be. But yes we do continue and do the best we can but.....yep it's not easy.
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Old 12-31-2020, 09:19 AM   #23
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I'm sorry for your loss. Such a personal loss so close to a holiday is rough, as it will be a consistent reminder.

Several year ago, my dad died the day before Thanksgiving. Now, I don't even recall the actual date, just that it was the day before Thanksgiving.

A couple of things:
If you don't have a pet, I recommend getting one. Companionship and something to care for can really help.

Something the geek in me has found oddly comforting at times is the idea that time is an illusion. Everything is happening now. Past, present, and future are like frames on a film: they all exist concurrently but our perception is limited to "the present". So, if the theory is valid, dad is still alive and well, just not here with me in the moment I am currently experiencing.
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Old 12-31-2020, 09:40 AM   #24
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My mom passed christmas night 3 years ago. You never get over it but a friend gave me good advise. Talk to him. Have conversations with hm. it really helped me.
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Old 12-31-2020, 10:10 AM   #25
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December 15th, I am trying to cope during the Holidays how can others deal with this tragedy. Still waiting for him to call to hear his voice that will never come. Sorry to Vent!
lots of people don't have dads, count your blessings and the time you had with him
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Old 12-31-2020, 10:34 AM   #26
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My mom passed christmas night 3 years ago. You never get over it but a friend gave me good advise. Talk to him. Have conversations with hm. it really helped me.
Sad, lost mine one year ago!! like she never left ..
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Old 12-31-2020, 01:54 PM   #27
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same, lost mine years ago, only time helps but it never really goes away, these are always some moments that memories come out of the blue like a hammer. Be strong.
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Old 12-31-2020, 02:58 PM   #28
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Something the geek in me has found oddly comforting at times is the idea that time is an illusion. Everything is happening now. Past, present, and future are like frames on a film: they all exist concurrently but our perception is limited to "the present". So, if the theory is valid, dad is still alive and well, just not here with me in the moment I am currently experiencing.
you ever watch The Egg?





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Old 12-31-2020, 05:04 PM   #29
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You know my recent situation so I feel for you, I really do. NOT looking forward to next year's reminders at all. But time does make things a bit easier, for all of us. Hang in there!
Man, we're both gonna be crazy at the same time come next year. It really is awful.
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Old 12-31-2020, 05:20 PM   #30
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Sorry for your loss! It's a tough year no doubt!
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Old 12-31-2020, 05:32 PM   #31
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My father died when I was nine months old.
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Old 12-31-2020, 08:19 PM   #32
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Rip, be strong, time heals
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Old 12-31-2020, 09:35 PM   #33
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I'm sorry. I lost my dad 13 yrs. ago and I still miss him. Keep him in your thoughts.
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Old 01-01-2021, 05:16 PM   #34
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Sorry Man...It sucks
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Old 01-02-2021, 05:55 PM   #35
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I’m sorry for your loss. My mom is 85 and dealing with colon cancer and no chemotherapy due to the pandemic. Forty years ago she had breast cancer and thirty years ago she had it again with a mastectomy.

It’s never easy losing a parent. My dad died in 2013 in the same nursing home that I was in.

The holidays are a tough time for a loss.
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Old 01-02-2021, 06:13 PM   #36
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I’m sorry for your loss. My mom is 85 and dealing with colon cancer and no chemotherapy due to the pandemic. Forty years ago she had breast cancer and thirty years ago she had it again with a mastectomy.

It’s never easy losing a parent. My dad died in 2013 in the same nursing home that I was in.

The holidays are a tough time for a loss.
I read this the other day and it might be helpful for your mom.
Artemisinin and sodium butyrate - combined cure cancer.
https://gab.com/Surfingranny4DJT/pos...55153897954120
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Old 01-02-2021, 06:58 PM   #37
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I read this the other day and it might be helpful for your mom.
Artemisinin and sodium butyrate - combined cure cancer.
https://gab.com/Surfingranny4DJT/pos...55153897954120
Thanks. She had surgery and she is doing okay. I’ll read this later tonight.

Losing your family is hard. People act like it’s not a traumatic issue.
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Old 01-05-2021, 09:13 AM   #38
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I haven't had to deal with the loss of a parent (thankfully) and I am not really sure how I would deal with it should it happen tomorrow. But I do know that no one can take away the memories, and if anything. We can always close our eyes, and hope to dream of those memories, and the time spent growing up with our parents... loving us, and cherishing us.

There is really no substitute for the unconditional love that usually only comes from a parent, so I really am truly sorry for your loss. I just hope you do know that he's in a better place now.

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Old 01-05-2021, 09:41 AM   #39
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So sorry for all You guys for loss, humain being is pricless but death is next door who s next?

Due this reason be good and treat people well in hope to be well treated always
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Old 01-06-2021, 06:57 AM   #40
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December 15th, I am trying to cope during the Holidays how can others deal with this tragedy. Still waiting for him to call to hear his voice that will never come. Sorry to Vent!
I feel for you. My dad passed a year ago and I feel his loss every day. At times I feel him around but you'll never forget only cope with it. That's the sad truth about life in that few of us understand that we're not immortal nor think about that one day we'll all die and what will we make of our life now.

Best way is to live a life that your dad would be proud of as well as you. Stick to the good memories and write off the bad ones as lessons. Finally be thankful that at least when he passed you were on good terms and that you let him know how much you did love him and all he did. You don't want regret to be apart of your grieving process.

I loved my dad as well - spent the last few days with him along with my family and he enjoyed being with his grandkids. That's how I am at peace though same as you - miss not hearing from him - his advice - humor and discussions.
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