NemesisEnforcer

Means nothing. With both their egos I'm sure they are on each other's no list.

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no one seems to be commenting on the "Raped you as a Feminist" verbiage

I'm not taking away anything from her allegations - he sounds like a monster.

But why the qualifying Feminist remark?

dyna mo

that's the problem with the OP, she takes a serious issue/allegation and spins it into an opportunity to advance her own bizarro agenda.

JFK

Totally, It should of been done then and there!

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The Porn Nerd

Thanks for confirming that you are, indeed, a total fucktard halfwit moron not worthy of oxygen.

What do Zombies (and violence on TV) have anything to do with rape allegations?

What a total asshat you are man. Fuck off now.

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Far-L

If she had a safe word and he ignored it, like was stated, then what?

I may not agree all the time with Rochard but on this point I couldn't agree more. No means no even if it replaced by a safe word.

The pathetic misogynist defenses of Deen's alleged actions in this thread, regardless of whether he is guilty or innocent, tell the truth about what a bunch of women hating troglodytes so many here really are. Disgusting.

Explain to your mom's and your daughters how no doesn't really mean no when it comes to sex.

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The Porn Nerd

Incredibly well stated. Bravo.

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American Psycho

you and rochard should get a pizza and talk about trucks.... lol
reread what i wrote, maybe 5x, or until you get it.

im not a woman hater at all.

what about a scenario when a person consents to sex acts that are fantasy rape with their partner?
that what seems to have been happening here.

do they then have the right to cry rape like a person who was beaten and forcibly raped by a criminal in the streets? is it the same thing?

i don't think so and its clearly stated deen and stoya are into that type of thing and she said she used her safe word, so clearly she consented to something that was RAPEY up until that point.

so the issue here is that he continued here past her "safe word" to stop the consensual fantasy rape that she wanted and agreed to, and now he's a rapist?

seems like weird logic/law to me.

i do not agree with that.

in other domestic cases i can totally see how a husband or ex could rape when a woman didn't consent but in a case where the woman consents to rape fantasy it seems flawed the she can later cry rape for it going a bit past what she asked for.

and , lets all totally ignore the big issue of if she has actually made a criminal report or is this just a twitter post.

dyna mo

what's the point of a safe word then? i've seen quite a few situations where an extra few minutes past the safe word means a life-threatening trip to the emergency room

ITraffic

JFK

They are Allegations only , Have not been proven in a court of law ! So before you label people "a bunch of women hating troglodytes" they are entitled to their opinion , same as you are !

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dyna mo

i admit, i had to refresh myself on wtf a troglodyte is.

The Porn Nerd

It is my opinion that they are a bunch of women hating troglodytes.

Better?

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American Psycho

and you sir are and ignorant pussy

American Psycho

i knew what it was. I'm clearly smarter.

dyna mo

You're clearly proving that with your understanding of what a safe word is combined with your thinking you and I are in a smart off.

American Psycho

OFC if you are doing something that putting someones life at risk the safe word have life and death meaning BUT here again if a woman consents to a sex scenario putting her life at risk and then dies is the partner a murderer if by chance she dies even if used the safe word and something went awry.

lets say a magicians assistant or a partner in climbing.

if you take that precedent then people in any event where there is risk of death and death occurs is a murderer.

clearly somewhere here the persons consent to an act has to mean something and be factored in.

i don't know all the details so i can't say but I'm putting it out there.

IF SHE CONSENTED TO FANTASY RAPE CAN SHE THEN CRY RAPE??????

answer that directly then use your safe word.

dyna mo

heads-up, i'm not the one that needs to have the meaning of safe word explained to me, life or death.

OneHungLo

What the fuck is a troglodyte lol.

SIK

That was a HOT porno, but more of these stories I read from various "porn stars", the more I'm sensing a heavy dose of jealousy and spike.

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dyna mo

comedy is all about timing.

The Porn Nerd

I love it when ignorant people call me ignorant. LOL I may be ignint but I know how to spell and use proper English.

Most of my ex-girlfriends. :D

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Far-L

I am labeling them that because that is what is clear from the positions they take on the subject. I am not taking a position on Deen's guilt or innocence. However, the excuses people are making based on the hearsay, the blatant trolling, etc. from people in this thread is 100% misogynist and in my opinion that makes them troglodytes.

And neanderthals too now that you mention it.

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JFK

There ya go with those big words again

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Far-L

You may not agree or understand the logic but that is entirely your own fault and lack of sensitivity to the issues. Understanding of why a SAFE WORD is critically important in those types of relationships, and comprehension of what it means to ignore a "NO" when that line is drawn is everything, couldn't agree more with Dyna Mo. You may see it as a "grey area" but being in this biz you should know better. The trust and security of having a safe word to help define that limit and boundary is 100% based on trust and acknowledgement so violating that trust is just black and white.

So to answer your question, yes, if there was a safe word that was ignored and something like rape or accidental death occurred then the person that did not heed the call and crossed the line is responsible.

This doesn't have to even be a "feminist" issue at all because the same principals would apply to even a same sex relationship.

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Far-L

One never knows when that Word-A-Day calendar is going to come in handy... you just have to bide your time and know you have a solid line of credit on the $.50 cent words...

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dyna mo

says the sesquipedalian.

American Psycho

grown men feeling high and mighty about being the auto correct police is quite funny.
it shows a total lack of any depth beyond that of a internet board idiot.

American Psycho

ANSWER THIS.
IF SHE CONSENTED TO FANTASY RAPE CAN SHE THEN CRY RAPE?

I think that is a very very gray area at best, regardless of a safe word and put the burden of the situation on the persons consent to enter such a role play.

Did he continue to fuck for 30 seconds or 1 minutes or did he keep her hostage and beat her for 3 days. If its anything close to the former then a rape accusation is very over the top.

Also jezze, she posted it on fucking twitter, Until she makes a formal police report this is all just an accusation with no facts beyond 150 char post which makes her accusation of rape look even less credible.

im not advocating rape at all just putting this in context of what seemed to have happened.

from whats known she to have very weak stance for an accusation of rape.

The Porn Nerd

There you go again. You never learn, do you?

You must be ignorant or something.

Let me learn you a lesson son. Your sentence should read thusly:

it shows a total lack of any depth beyond that of an internet board idiot

We'll leave the fact that you forgot to capitalize the first letter of your sentence for Lesson 2.

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dyna mo

i certainly agree that running to twitter is not the way to handle it. and sure, fantasy rape has gray areas that make defining a safe word important, assuming this, as i've never participated in that or witnessed it.

nevertheless, my post to you was re: a safe word specifically and the fact it is a distinct and clear boundary understood to not be crossed while engaging in extreme sex. it doesn't mean, well, i'm about to bust a nut so hold on. or no means yes, or anything other than stop right now.

Far-L

Do you personally know anyone into these types of fantasies that indulges in this as a lifestyle choice? Perhaps a friend could get it through to you so you understand. Going even one second past the call to stop is wrong. Those into this type of thing will tell you how important that trust and understanding is to the whole relationship. Fantasy is one thing but when it is going too far there has to be an acknowledgement and consent and agreement to stop. Trying to test that limit beyond what a person desires means it is no longer serving the fantasy of the one and only serving the desire of the other and that makes it non-consensual.

Make sense?

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American Psycho

I've produced 200+ bdsm movies so yes i know about this.

"Going even one second past the call to stop is wrong."
BUT IS IT RAPE IN THE COMMON SENSE OF THE TERM?
I DONT THINK SO.
WRONG YES. RAPE IN THE COMMON SENSE? DEFINITELY NO.
ESPECIALLY WHEN THE CONSENTED FANTASY BEING PLAYED IS RAPE.
AND YES IT MATTERS WHAT LINE WAS CROSSED.
DID THE DOM CONTINUE FOR 1MIN OR DID DOM CONTINUE FOR 3HRS. MATTERS WHEN THROWING THE TERM RAPE AROUND AND LABELING SOMEONE AS A RAPIST.

dyna mo

at some point past saying stop, consensual sex becomes nonconsensual right?

American Psycho

Like i said its a very gray area, especially when the consent was for rape play.
Rape is a very serious accusation and these details in such a scenario matter.
It also matters what line was crossed.

xXXtesy10

guy is an arrogant prick

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dyna mo

if it's not rape, then what is it? assault? nothing?

American Psycho

its certainly something.

i feel the details of the scenario would determine what it would be called.
it may actually be rape but rape is a very strong word to throw around.
and given that we know she contented to extreme play starting (ie safe work being used) it better be a major line he crossed to call someone a rapist to 200k followers.

i can't say if its right or wrong in this case but she better have a MAJOR reason to do that given that she was consented with extreme play starting.

The Porn Nerd

This is especially true if one is part of a community of sex positive polyamorous lovers. If someone went even one second past a safe word the rest of the community would hear of it immediately and that person could no longer play with that group.

Very serious indeed.

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So far I have not seen anywhere that she has said that Deen outright raped her.

She qualifies it by saying he "raped her as a feminist"

Isn't that only a half-accusation?

Once again - he seems like a monster I'm not taking his side, I believe in no-means-no but if there was a grey area here (they were in the midst of having consensual sex when the "rape" occurred?) then she made it a LOT Greyer with the raped the feminist remark.

georgeyw

The only point that you should take note of is that they had a safe word. That is something they would have discussed and agreed upon *before* beginning any sexual contact.

So if they both agreed on a word that would be used to break OUT of the fantasy. If that word is then ignored when it is used in exactly the circumstances that they both had discussed it was to be used... That doesn't strike you as against the other person's consent?

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The Porn Nerd

And what is this "unavailable until blah blah" shit about? You cannot access Twitter wherever you are Stoya?

To be 100% fair here is probably what happened: James Deen is a jerk to many women in porn and now Stoya (and others) want to ruin his rep. Maybe it's justified, maybe it isn't. But "rape" should bring with it evidence and criminal charges. If not, it's hearsay and inflammatory.

As sad as it may be for feminists and the issue of rape, Stoya's allegations may end up doing more harm than good. If not true and/or she can't prove them it will make taking porn girls (or any woman's) rape allegations less serious.

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georgeyw

I read that a few times and feel as though maybe she messed up the grammar on that post.

ie

This :
Should have been ?

Not such a huge stretch, I know I stuff up grammar on my phone all the time and don't bother fixing it, although this has a far greater meaning....

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georgeyw

I disagree, it takes a lot of courage for these women to speak up, especially when it is against an influential person / person they see as powerful in their industry.

Look at history and how other powerful / influential men (abusers) have been brought down by one woman speaking up then others feeling empowered to do the same.

Don't shame these women for not having the courage to speak up when the event happened, applaud them for having the courage to speak up now.

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C H R I S

qft......

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The Porn Nerd

I agree totally. Sorry if my point was lost there. But the way in which Stoya did this/is doing this is not the best strategy in my opinion. Too much room to call her tactics and motives into question. But I absolutely believe women should feel safe to speak out when assaulted and if this is the end result then something great has come of this.

If I were a Miss Universe pageant contestant my answer, when asked what my dream was, would be: "The total and complete eradication of rape, assault and sexual slavery on Earth." I wouldn't win, of course. LOL

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georgeyw

I honestly do not know the best way these types of things could be handled, all I think is that there would be a huge amount of emotions involved. That usually doesn't help with adopting the best strategy at the best of times.

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jimmycooper

I don't wanna sound like a queer or nothin but that was a pretty badass post.

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The Porn Nerd

Well, standing behind the statement/allegation and not dropping it like a bomb then disappearing for a month would be a good start.

Agreed.

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American Psycho

she has the courage to call it out on twitter publicly but to not bring charges.
she consented to rape play but then doesn't like it went a bit far.

that doesn't add up. a lot doest add up to a rape accusation here.